GREEN
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2795 15.29 KB 276
2795 15.29 KB 276
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>Yesterday was probably one of the best days you’ve had in a very long time.
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>You lay in bed for a little bit to think.
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>As long as you go out with your friends, things can be fun.
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>’Do you honestly believe they can do this all the time?’
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>Of course not, I’m not dumb.
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>’Really? It took both Connie AND Rest to get you out of the house.’
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>That’s different.
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>’No it isn’t, had they not pushed, you would’ve stayed inside.’
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>Yeah, you’re right about that.
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>’When this is all over, things will go back to the same routine, you can never escape that.’
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“That’s not true.”
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>’Don’t fucking lie to yourself Eri, it’s sad.’
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>You pull a pillow over your head and groan into it.
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>’Can’t ignore this forever, you will see.’
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“Fuck this.”
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>Tossing the pillow aside, you get up and leave the bedroom.
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>As you go out into the hallway, you nearly slip on the socks you’re wearing.
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>Forgot about those, you put them on to hide the bandages last night.
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>Carefully, you continue to the source of the heavenly aroma.
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>Of course Connie is cooking again.
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“That smells wonderful.”
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>Connie turns to you with a small smirk.
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>>”I’m certain it does, it’s french toast with a side of hay bacon.”
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>Not like your stomach is going to argue with that.
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>Joining Rest at the table, you see she is half finished.
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>”Nice socks.”
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>You stumble out an excuse.
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“T-thanks, my hooves were a little cold last night.”
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>>”Told you it can get cold at night here.”
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>Rolling your eyes, you reply back.
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“And that’s why I packed socks and hoodies.”
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>You start to eat and let out a small moan of satisfaction.
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>Hearing a giggle you see Rest looking at you with a smile.
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>”Yeah, it is good isn’t it?”
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>Nodding, you rather not speak right now, just enjoy the food.
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>As you continue to eat, Connie joins you both.
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>>”So, after I’m done practicing, where would you two like to go next?”
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>”You mentioned the museum, how about there?”
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>Before they can ask you like yesterday, you just agree.
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“Sounds good.”
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>>”Great, we can even get a tour as well. I haven’t been there in a while, but it’s a lovely place. I’m certain you two will like it.”
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>You nod along and finish eating.
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>Figuring you should go wash up, you head back to the bedroom.
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“I’ll go prepare then.”
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>Connie nods and the two of them start to chat as you reach the bedroom.
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>You look through your clothes and just settle on wearing the same hoodie again.
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>No point in changing into something else, though the socks gotta go.
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>You set them aside for now.
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>Though as you turn to go to the bathroom, you run into Rest.
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>”Hey there.”
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>You freeze, thankfully the bandages are covered by the clothes you’re holding, but that doesn’t stop the fear.
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“H-hey.”
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>She looks concerned.
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>”Just checking on you, wanna make sure you’re alright.”
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>Of course.
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>’Why wouldn’t she? You cause her enough concern.’
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“Yeah I’m fine, looking forward to seeing the museum.”
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>She smiles and gets a little closer making you feel more nervous.
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>”I’m happy to hear that, but don’t forget that you can open up to either of us.”
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>Rest gives you a small hug, one you eagerly return.
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>’You’re so desperate it’s pathetic.’
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>Let me have this dammit.
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>She pulls away, and gives a soft smile.
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>You give a smile in return and head into the bathroom.
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>As the tub slowly fills, you check on your cut from yesterday.
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>Looks better, but that doesn’t mean much.
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>’So how long do you think you will hold out Eri?’
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“As long as I can.”
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>’You know Rest really isn’t your friend, right?’
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>Your anger starts to rise.
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“Just fuck off.”
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>’Touched a nerve? She sees you as a pet project you know.’
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“T-that’s not true.”
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>’Face it, when you’re fully ‘healed’ she will leave you.’
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>Gritting your teeth and squeezing your eyes tightly you try to silence the thoughts.
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“Leave me alone...Please...”
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>The sound of the filling tub is the only noise you hear.
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>Opening your eyes slowly, let out a slow sigh of relief.
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“Have to stop doing that.”
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>Turning off the facet, you climb into the tub and try to relax.
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>However, your thoughts start to wander again.
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>How long will you actually hold out?
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>It’s not like you want to die, right?
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>…
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>Maybe dying isn’t so bad...
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>Shaking your head, you quickly clean up rather than deal with this shit.
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>Though you hurry, it doesn’t hide the fact that you thought of that.
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“W-why can’t I just be normal? Seriously, is it that fucking hard?”
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>Silence.
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>Letting out a groan, you should know better by now.
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>Just as you’re about to leave the bathroom, you nearly forget to wrap up your leg again.
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“Idiot, I can’t believe I nearly did that.”
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>You quickly wrap it up and look it over.
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>Feeling satisfied, you put on your hoodie and head out to the other room.
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>Connie’s music echos from the living room, it soothes you a little.
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“At least I have that...”
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>Slowly you trot to the living room, and see them both were they where yesterday.
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>For a while, you stand there in the entrance, just listening to the music.
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>It’s beautiful.
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>Makes you wish you could play an instrument, but you always sucked.
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>All you have is a talent that no pony can enjoy, least of all yourself.
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>A cold feeling enters your heart, and your eyes start to moisten.
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>You close them in an attempt to hold back the tears, but a few tears fall to the floor.
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>Taking a few steps back, you don’t want either of them to see you like this.
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>You can’t hold back much longer, so you retreat to the bedroom to let it out.
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>The moment you reach the bed, you bury your head in a pillow and softly cry.
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>Rest even told you that you could open up to either of them, but here you are, alone and crying.
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>But you know why you’re not, you don’t want them to see you suffer nor do you want them change today’s plans.
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>Just suffer alone...For them…
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>Eventually your tears dry up, and you pull away from the pillow.
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>Your voice is barely a whisper now.
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“S-so s-stupid...”
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>You rub your eyes and head to the bathroom to see if you can hide the disgrace marking your face.
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>Looking into the mirror reveals your eyes are bloodshot and puffy.
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>’How do you intend to hide this one?’
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“I’ll figure it out.”
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>’You can’t expect them to not see it.’
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“J-just leave me alone...”
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>You turn on the facet and splash some cold water on your face.
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>It helps freshen you up a little, but you’re going to have to wait it out for your eyes to clear up.
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>So you sit in the bathroom and trace a hoof over the other leg’s scars.
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“Don’t remember most of these...”
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>Many you did while falling apart, even got close to cutting too deep far too many times.
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>Some like yesterday, were in a bathroom.
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>A sudden knocking causes you to jump.
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>”How long are you going to be?”
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>Of course it’s Rest…
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“Just a few more minutes!”
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>You give yourself a once over in the mirror and hope for the best.
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>Thankfully your eyes are mostly cleared up.
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>You flush the toilet and run the sink for a minute before turning it off.
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>Opening the door you give Rest a fake smile and head to the living room.
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>Connie is looking over some music sheets again.
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“H-hey, how’s it going?”
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>She beams and turns her attention to you.
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>>”Pretty good actually, I’d say practice went well, how about yourself?”
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>’Yeah, how about it Eri?’
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>Still wearing the same fake smile, you answer her.
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“I’m doing alright, little nervous about today.”
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>Connie nods and motions for you to sit, which you do.
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>>”It’s okay to be nervous, just remember we will be right there with you. I’m certain you will like what the museum has to the offer.”
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>Hopefully she’s right.
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“Yeah, I’m sure I will get through it.”
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>She nods and starts to put away her things.
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>>”Suppose I should get ready as well, be right back.”
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>You nod and watch her leave.
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>While your anxiety settles, your mind wanders.
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>’Do you think you will actually enjoy going to a museum?’
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>Haven’t been to one since I was little, so maybe I’ll appreciate it more.
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>’At least with the theater you couldn’t see the other ponies, but now you will be surrounded in broad daylight.’
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>I can handle this.
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>’Maybe you will, maybe you won’t. With your track record though...’
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“I said I will handle this.”
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>”Who are you talking to Eri?”
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>Freezing up, you see Rest looking confused.
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>Your embarrassment skyrockets and you stumble out a response.
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“I-um...I-I...M-myself! I was talking to myself.”
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>Sure it’s the truth, but do you honestly think she will buy that?
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>”Okay, do you want to talk? I know you tend to talk to yourself when you get worked up.”
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>Forgot she knew that, don’t need to say everything though.
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“J-just stress that’s all. Still working my way through all of this. Don’t worry though, I haven’t forgotten what either of you have said.”
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>She smiles and nods.
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>”I can imagine, you’re doing really well so far.”
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>’Holy shit, she actually bought that?’
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>Just fuck off.
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“You think so? Maybe this is all working out then.”
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>’Or maybe you’re on a path to collapse, again.’
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>I can try dammit.
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>”Yes I do, you’ve taken another step towards getting better.”
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>Maybe you are getting better.
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>’We’ll see about that.’
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>Ignoring that thought, you stand up, feeling a little more renewed.
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>Connie trots back into the living room looking quite pleased.
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>>”Alright, lets get going, I’m really excited to visit the museum again. I usually feel inspired after I go there.”
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>The three of you leave the apartment and like yesterday, Connie hails a taxi.
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>Though this time, you try to stay focused.
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>Just remember Eri, do it for them.
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>A taxi pulls up and you climb in, you decide to try to chat with the other two this time.
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“From the sounds of things, you’ve been to the museum a lot?”
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>Connie nods.
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>>”Yes, it’s nice to see what history is contained within. Really puts a whole perspective on everything.”
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>”I can imagine a city like this has a lot of history, though I don’t know much about Manehattan.”
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>>”It’s not just on Manehattan, there is stuff on the history of Equestria and much more.”
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>Would be nice if you could share their enthusiasm, maybe you will when you see it all.
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>While you wouldn’t mind adding more to the conversation, you start to zone out.
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>’Giving up again?’
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>They understand, not like they expect me to be as talkative.
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>’Do you honestly believe that? They would probably like it more if you actually talked instead of being a fucking wall.’
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>Die in a fire.
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>The taxi pulls up to a huge concrete building adorned with statues and pillars.
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>Guess this is the museum.
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>Connie and Rest get out of the taxi with you joining them.
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>As you all trot up to the building, you’re starting to feel overwhelmed
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>This place feels really imposing.
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>Damn anxiety is trying to dissuade you again.
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>Gritting your teeth, you continue to follow them and watch as Connie talks to a mare who probably is in charge of tours.
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>You look around in the meantime, this place has high ceilings and banners.
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>Of course there is a fuck ton of ponies around, and slowly you feel yourself start to shake.
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>Not because you’re cold, but because you’re so damn afraid.
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>For fucks sake, just hold on Eri, you can do this.
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>You pulse rises and with it, so does your breathing.
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>Come on you piece of trash, don’t give in, please for the love of Celestia, don’t give in…
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>>”We made it just in time for the next tour.”
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>Snapping out of it, you see Connie smiling and looking at you two.
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>Thank fuck…
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>You slowly calm down and follow Connie as she leads you over to a group.
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>A guide grabs the attention of the whole group.
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>>>”Alright everypony, we are about to begin our journey through the museum. I ask that you wait to ask questions till after I explain each exhibit and to stay together. We don’t want anypony to get lost after all. Is everypony ready then?”
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>A collective agreement goes out from the group.
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>She smiles and starts to lead the group to one of the wings of the museum.
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>>>”Starting off with Manehattan, it was founded shortly after the unification of the three tribes. This was necessary...”
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>Slowly, you tune her out and look at the many exhibits around the room.
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>There are many pictures and even some old things from when the city was founded.
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>You feel yourself start to relax as you distract yourself.
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>The guide starts to move with the group again and you follow along once more.
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>This section has various fossils, skeletons, and all other kinds of stuff.
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>Of course you zone in on the skeletons, they looks pretty cool.
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>One of which is labeled Modern Equus.
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“Huh, so that’s what is inside of me. Spooky.”
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>”It’s pretty rad.”
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>You jump and notice Rest is looking at the skeleton with you.
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>She realizes this and smirks.
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>”Jumpy?”
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“Fuck, you scared me.”
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>She giggles.
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>”Didn’t mean to, but I’m happy to see you interested.”
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>>”Come on you two, we can’t fall behind.”
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>You both look to see Connie waving to the moving group.
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>”Be right with you.”
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>Nodding, you both quickly rejoin the group.
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>Looks like the next area is dedicated to Equestion history in general.
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>Sure you learned that in school and you forgot most of it, but it’s kinda nice to remember.
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>As the tour guide talks, you look around again.
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>’Can’t pay attention, can you?’
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>I can, just rather look is all.
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>’You were the same way when you were a filly, guess you didn’t change at all.’
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>That’s not true, I’m not a damn filly anymore.
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>’Doesn’t stop you from breaking down and crying like one.’
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>It’s not like I want to!
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>’That’s real rich. ALL of your problems are from being an attention whore.’
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>Shut the fuck up!
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>’Truth hurts, don’t it Eri? Then again, that’s not the only thing that hurts, you hurt yourself.’
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>You shut your eyes tightly as tears threaten to emerge.
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>I am getting better, regardless of what you think.
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>’You mean what you think. I am a random thought in YOUR head, YOUR thoughts at that.’
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>I-I need to find Rest and Connie.
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>As you open your eyes, you don’t see the group.
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>Your eyes widen as you realize you’re alone.
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“No, no, no, no...I-I can find them...Just focus like they told you.”
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>Quickly, you start to look for them.
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>As you enter the next room, you see them quickly rush to you.
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>”There you are!”
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>>”Are you alright?”
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“Yeah I’m fine, just got distracted is all.”
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>”Are you sure about that? You don’t look alright.”
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>You probably look awful.
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“I just...I had a minor incident, that’s all.”
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>They don’t look that convinced.
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>>”How about we just...Finish this up and get going?”
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>Connie looks to Rest who nods.
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>’Fantastic Eri, you ruined the whole tour.’
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>You say nothing and follow them while looking downwards.
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>Though they talk and try to include you, you just nod or shake your head instead of talking.
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>The tour finishes up and you leave them with, feeling worse.
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>Even the ride back to the apartment, you remain silent.
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>When you get back, you skip out on dinner and just head back to the bedroom.
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“...Idiot...Couldn’t stay normal for one day...No...”
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>Tears fall freely as you reach the bed and collapse on it.
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>Slowly, you fall asleep crying.
by NHanon
by NHanon
by NHanon
by NHanon
by NHanon