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Flanking Maneuvers Musical Short 6.

By Mandroid
Created: 19th December 2020 01:39:20 PM

  1. =Flanking Maneuvers Musical Short 6=
  2.  
  3. >You are Princess Celestia and you're at the Grand Galloping Gala.
  4. >It was the biggest night of the year for you, even bigger than the summer solstice and your husband's annual attempt to do something idiotic.
  5. >You have finally escaped from your spot at the top of the stairs and are now going around greeting the meeting dignitaries.
  6. "Why hello, governor! Is your daughter taking to being a mother well?"
  7. >She had better be for ruining the body she had...
  8. >Governor What's-his-name chuckles. "She iz taking very vell to zee change, Princess. Zhank you for askingk."
  9. >What the HELL was that accent?
  10. "Oh I'm overjoyed to hear it. I truly cannot wait to see the little bundle of joy  in a few years time."
  11. >Note to self: Get stronger liquor for when the baby arrives.
  12. >The governor's wife walks up next to him and bows to you.
  13. >"Good evening Princess, this is a wonderful party."
  14. >You return the bow.
  15. "Made only so by the guests that attend."
  16. >She glances around. "Princess...where may I ask has your husband run off to? I admit that I've heard the stories about him and wanted to see for myself..."
  17. >You force a soft laugh.
  18. "I'm afraid my husband cannot join us this evening, he has...come down with something."
  19. >She brings her hoof to her mouth. "Oh dear! Is everything alright?"
  20. >You wave a hoof.
  21. "Simply a stomach virus, nothing more. The poor dear was throwing up not too long ago."
  22. >That was the best excuse for "drank too damn much of the alcohol" you had.
  23. >"Well, please give him our warm wishes."
  24. >You're almost in the clear here.
  25. "I'll be sure to tell him you said hel-"
  26. >You feel your face fall to the floor when the music starts.
  27. "Shit."
  28.  
  29. >Mous burst through the doors at the end of the hall, his suit jacket unbuttoned and a stumble in his step.
  30. >He looks across the floor at everyone in attendance and then bumbles out onto it.
  31. >"Well I'm upper-upper class high society..."
  32. >He raises his hand to the skylight "God's gift to ballroom notoriety!...*hic!*"
  33. >He spins around, addressing everyp0ny here. "And I always fill my ballroom, the event is never shmall,"
  34. >"The social pages say I've got the biggest balls of all. HA!"
  35. >Mous begins some sort of shimmying dance towards various members of the congregation, they're wise enough to back away.
  36. >"I've got big balls!"
  37. >"I've got big balls..."
  38. >"They're such big balls, and they're dirty big balls!
  39. >Your soon to be dead husband points to Fancypants across the hall and you.
  40. >"And he's got big balls and she's got big balls..."
  41. >And from somewhere, a choir of voices joins him in shouting "BUT WE'VE GOT THE BIGGEST BALLS OF THEM ALL!"
  42.  
  43. >"Huh!"
  44. >Mous jumps up on a nearby table and walks down it, kicking plates off as he goes.
  45. >"And my ballssh are always bouncing, my ballroom always full. And everybody cums and cums again!"
  46. >Some ponies snicker at the innuendo, others blush and turn away as he jumps down and wraps his arms around their shoulders.
  47. >"If your name is on the guest list, no one can take you higher..."
  48. >Mous twirls away and grabs at his groin, tugging and flitting his tongue like a snake.
  49. "Everybody says I've got great balls of fire!"
  50. >Mous sticks his hands deep into his pockets, leaving nothing to the imagination about what he's doing with them as he struts around.
  51. >"I've got big balls! Oh I've got big balls!"
  52. >"And they're such big balls, dirty big balls!"
  53. >"And he's got big balls,  and she's got big balls..."
  54. >"BUT WE'VE GOT THE BIGGEST BALLS OF THEM ALL!"
  55. >Mous spins around and makes a beeline for you and the governor's family.
  56. "Oh stars..." you mumble.
  57. >He gets close and loops his arms over each of their backs, grinning like a madman.
  58. >"Some balls are held for charity...And some for fancy dressh..."
  59. >He leans over to the governor's wife, right up to her ear. "But when they're held for pleasure, they're the balls that I like best~"
  60. >"O-oh my..." she mutters.
  61. >You will wreck that whore right here if she makes a-
  62. >No, husband singing, be angry.
  63.  
  64. >"My balls are always bouncing! To the left and to the right..."
  65. >Mous struts between the two of them and comes up beside you.
  66. >"It's my belief that my big balls should be held every night...HA!"
  67. >With a slap on your rear and a blush to your face, he runs off into the dance floor.
  68. >He spins around, gesturing to every single pony in the ballroom.
  69. >"We've got big balls!"
  70. >"We've got big balls!"
  71. >"We've got big balls!"
  72. >"Dirty big balls!"
  73. >"He's got big balls, she's got big balls!"
  74. >"BUT WE'VE GOT THE BIGGEST BALLS OF THEM ALL!"
  75. >Mous sways back and forth pointing at his balls.
  76. >"WE'VE GOT BIG BALLS!" they sang.
  77. >"WE'VE GOT BIG BALLS!"
  78. >Mous runs around to various ponies in the room.
  79. >"And I'm just itching to tell you about them!"
  80. >"Oh we had such wonderful fun!"
  81. >"Seafood cocktail, crabs, crayfish!"
  82. >"BUT WE'VE GOT THE BIGGEST BALLS OF THEM ALL!"
  83. >All eyes are on you as Mous struts around you with his tongue out and his mystery choir sang.
  84. >"BALL SUCKER!"
  85. >"BALL SUCKER!"
  86. >"BALL SUCKER!"
  87. >"BALL SUCKER!"
  88.  
  89. >Welp, time for Option Black.
  90. >With their eyes on you, the guests in the room don't notice one of the tables glowing golden before being launched at high speed out the window into the fountain below.
  91. "Oops! Discord must be causing trouble! Gala canceled, the guards will help you get to safety. Get the buck out  of my house while beat an ape!"
  92. >You grab Mous in your grip and drag him away.
  93. >"GOODNIGHT! AND GOD BLESS!" he calls back.
AIE Safe Anon Celestia Comedy

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