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1885 10.8 KB 179
1885 10.8 KB 179
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=Am I Evil 22=
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>You walk down the street enjoying the slightly warmer weather with a spring in your step.
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>The sun was shining, your cereal was delicious, and you slept well last night. You were ready for a full day of music.
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>You round the corner to your practice space and run your hand along the wall to-
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>Standing outside the back door and leaning on the wall stood Flim and Flam smoked a cigarette each and looked drained.
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>…Oh…
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>It was going to be one of THOSE days.
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>You sigh and walk up to them scratching your head.
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“Do I even want to know?”
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>Flim rubs his face. “We’ve been here…since DAWN…fulfilling the inanest requests imaginable.
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“Huh?”
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“Are the others already here?”
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>Flam jerks his thumb inside. “Everyone but Chrysalis, we went on break before she could demand we drive a bus.”
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>Bus?
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“What the hell kind of requests are we talking about here?”
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>You don’t do anything with children or animals.
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>They both run their face or pinch their nose. “Just…go inside, see for yourself.”
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>Oh WOW.
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“That bad, huh?”
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>The twins nod.
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>You put your hand on the door and make sure to take a deep breath before you head inside.
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>Oh.
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>OH.
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>…Oh…
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>You walk into the break room and find a familiar, but equally peculiar sight. Eris sits on the back couch with her hair dyed jet black and her skin sickeningly pale. She’s dressed in an all-black one slip gown with a collar around her neckline and big white gloves on. She leans back and smokes a cigarette through a holder.
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“…Hhhhhhhiiiii sweety.”
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>She glances over to you. “Salutations, Anonymous.”
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“What the fuck is with the look?”
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>Eris bristles and looks at you. “This is the new me.”
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“Eh?”
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>She flips her hair back over her shoulders. “After our occult ritual on the bus, I felt the presence of Tirek inside me. Through my own research, I’ve decided to embrace all there is about Tirekism and make me a better musician.
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>You walk over to the counter and grab some fruit, turning off the tv as it blabbed on about a collection of magical disturbances coming up from the south or some nonsense.
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“New you, huh?”
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>”Yep.”
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“This isn’t you.”
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>She bristles again.
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“You sit in your pajamas and watch cartoons-“
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>”Anime.”
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“-Anime all day. You impulse buy and binge eat because you love life. I’ve never seen anyone who loves life as much as you. Seeing you all…bleak and black is gross.”
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>Eris bristles again.
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>”I. Am a spirit of Chaos. Nothing is “not me” because “me” is anything. It’s practically my duty to shake things up.”
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>You chuckle once.
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“Not if it’s fuckin’ stupid.”
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>Eris glares at you for a few seconds before you both hear a loud blaring horn.
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>Was that a fucking bus?
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>It was. It was a fucking bus.
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>You and Eris walk outside to see about two dozen people filing off a double decker bus in fuxedos.
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“What the shit is THIS?”
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>You hear cackling behind you and turn to see Chrysalis get out of the limo. “They found their way here!”
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“What the HELL Chrys! What is this?”
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>”The Canterlot Royal Orchestra.”
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>HAHA. WHAT.
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“You drove them HERE? From THERE?”
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>”Yes?” She says cocking an eyebrow.
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“It’s a six hour train ride!”
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>”And about a twelve hour bus ride, hence the luxury bus.”
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“Fucking WHY?”
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>Chrysalis strides over and puts her hands on her hips, looking at the orchestra.
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>”We need to go bigger, that’s why!” she crows. “Better! More grandiose! More in-your-face! We need to grab the world by the ears and shout who we are right in its face!”
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>Eris blows smoke from her cigarette next to you.
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“I’ll reiterate. FUCKING WHY?”
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>Chrysalis turns back to you. “I was thinking an orchestral metal album.”
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>You drag your hand down your face and point to Eris.
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“What do you think of this?”
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>Chrysalis looks Eris over. “Honey…black is not your color.”
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>Eris sneers.
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“Yes, okay? That’s retarded.”
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>You take the Changeling by the shoulder and turn her to the bus.
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“This? ALSO retarded.”
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>Chrysalis narrows her eyes at you.
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>”Do I even want to ask?” you hear behind you.
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>You turn around again, Sombra walks up to the commotion wearing a ratty old hoodie with stains on it, his face is drained of color and his eyes are red.
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“What the FUCK happened to you?”
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>”I got invited to a party…”
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“When?”
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>Sombra blinks a few times at you. “Thhhhree days ago?”
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“Have you SLEPT since then?”
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>”I think so…”
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>You rub your face.
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“Dude…come on, serious the fuck up.”
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>”I’m serious as fu-.”
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>He doesn’t finish what he’s saying before two identical girls come around the corner.
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>”HEY! SOMBRA!”
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>”Shit…” he groans.
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>What was it no-oh.
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>The two women, both sporting a -lovely- pair of baby-bumps march up to him.
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>”Why haven’t you answered your phone?” “Why have you been avoiding us?” “When are you going to take responsibility for our children!?” they shout.
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>Sombra closes his eyes and raises his hands. “As me and my lawyer BOTH told you ladies, I’m not taking responsibility for anything until they come out and you get a dna test.”
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>The two stare at him with contempt, probably fucking gold diggers.
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>You put your hand on Sombra’s shoulder and look at him, getting his back.
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“You heard the man.”
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>Despite what you expected, Sombra grunts and shakes your hand off. “I don’t need your friggen help here, man.”
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>Okay that was-
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>”THIS IS THE LAST BLOODY DAMN STRAW!”
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>Oh what now.
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>You look up and see Artemis floating down on waves of magic, something you rarely see him do.
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“Ho boy…”
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>”Eighty percent!” he shouts, touching down. “You people have spent eight per-goddamn-cent of my fucking money on expenses for this band and it stops NOW!”
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>Chrysalis and Eris look at him. “I thought you covered band operational funds…” Chrys says.
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>”Yeah, you always bankroll us.” Eris adds.
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>Artemis marches up to the two girls, still furious. “I’m not paying for luxury bussing for fucking sixty and-“
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>Artemis grabs Eris’s hair and sniffs it. “-Royal Obsidian hair dye!”
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>”The guy at the store said this was the best…”
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>”Because it’s made with ACTUAL crushed obsidian, Eris! That doesn’t grow on bloody trees!”
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>Sombra rolls his eyes. “Okay, we get it, just drop the fucking dad routine and tell us to use our own money next time, jee-“
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>Artemis interrupts him by laughing a great belly laugh. “We could sell a hundred million records and it wouldn’t be enough to cover the legal costs you get us into you great big Neanderthal! A fraction of the kingdom’s gpd goes to keeping people from throwing you back in the ice but at this rate I may just let them!”
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>Sombra’s brow furrows. “Oh come off it!”
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>”Blow me!”
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>Chrysalis slaps Artemis shoulder, he pushes her off.
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“Guys! Stop the shit!”
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>”Don’t fucking hit me, Chrysalis!”
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>”Get off your high horse and stop trying to hold us back, Artemis! Your rotund sister belongs there but you -chose- to come down here into the dirt with us!”
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>”Stop stifling my creativity!” Eris whines.
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“Will you assholes stop levying your past mistakes NOW and admit when you’re wrong?”
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>Everything after that devolves into a shouted argument between four immortal powerhouses that scream with energy crackling around their eyes and you.
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>The onlookers take a step back.
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>”HEY ASSHOLES!”
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>”WHAT!?” you all turn to shout at Flim.
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>Wait. Flim?
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>Flim, his brother, and Huey all stand by the back door.
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>”We quit.”
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>You blink twice. It was quiet now.
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“…What?”
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>”He said we quit. Fucking goodbye.” Flam says walking past his brother.
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>You turn your head and watch the two best technicians walk down the street before snapping back to Ahuizotl.
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“Huey…what the fuck?”
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>Huey, the eternal rock of the Neon Knights, takes a drag on his cigarette. “I give it three days, Anonymous.”
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>Huh?
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“What?”
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>Huey holds up three fingers. “Three. Days.”
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>”Three days is what I give you before we can’t be convinced otherwise.”
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>”Hey if Flim and Flam want to quit, that’s their ca-“ Sombra starts.
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>Huey points a sharp finger at the crystal king. “SHUT. Your lantern mouth, Sombra. I don’t know if the view is distorted from your crystal tower but you DON’T treat your crew like that, especially not your friends.”
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>”You sound like those disgusting pop songs…” Eris says.
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>Huey puts his hands in his pockets. “Maybe you five idiots ought to give them a listen, they do a good job of teaching toddlers not to be dicks.”
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>The others don’t laugh at Huey’s joke, but you can’t get past something else.
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“Huey, what did you mean “we can’t be convinced otherwise”?”
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>Huey is silent for a few moments. He takes his cigarette from his mouth and slowly, carefully stomps it out.
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>”Look, this is hard to say. None of us wants it deep down.” He looks back up at you. “But like the wonder twins, I’m fucking DONE until you dimwits get your shit together or get gone.”
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>The air hangs still for an eternity. “Nobody likes a diva.”
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>Huey puts his hands in his pockets and walks away.
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“Huey, wait!”
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>”Nothing more to say, Anon. Good luck.”
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>Then he was gone.
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>You all untangle from the melee you were in and look around.
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The orchestra, the twins, they were all gone.
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>No one speaks, but everyone looks to each other.
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>”We…are back in Stalliongrad…” Chrysalis says. “In that alley…”
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>”But I thought we fixed our songs…?” Eris says.
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>”But we didn’t fix -us- Eri…”
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>”Oh…” She looks down at the ground.
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“Fuck…”
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>This can’t be it.
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>”We need to see Him.”
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>You look back up at Chrysalis, all the others nod at her in agreement.
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“Who’s Him?”
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>”He’s been around almost as long as Tirek was, always on the fringes…”
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>Eris puts her arm on your shoulder. “We gotta go see The Child, Anon.”
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-Elsewhere-
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>You trudge through the desert lands, drinking in the death around you.
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>The world had changed since you last walked it, you could feel the primal power of your dirge from eons past singing in the air.
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>It fed you, yet drove your hunger like nothing before you.
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>Suddenly, from the east, you feel a twinge of something.
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>You crane your head and reach out with your senses.
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>The state of the world had a catalyst…and that catalyst was fracturing. You could feel it.
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>Their power over the world had been shaken, their link to your ancient enemy nearly severed then and there.
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>Now was the time to act.
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>You turn your head behind you.
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“The long dawn soon approaches, our shadows will not be at the advantage for long.”
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>Turning back and leaning on your lute, you push forward and bring the storm with you.
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“We march to their heart, and we will pluck it from their chests before their saviors can reach them.”
by Mandroid
by Mandroid
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