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Malus Equestria - Chapter 1 (And only one) AKAME AUG 27TH, 2013

By Sodapop
Created: 2020-12-23 01:09:21
Expiry: Never

  1. 1.
    >"Come on. Move!"
  2. 2.
    >Twilight Sparkle stares angrily at the wriggling mass of flesh trapped inside a glass dome on her desk.
  3. 3.
    >The recently ascended princess flips through her notes before sighing in frustration.
  4. 4.
    >"Chaos Worms are supposed to… cause chaos!"
  5. 5.
    >*Poke* *Poke*
  6. 6.
    >She prods the bunch of invertebrates in an attempt to cause a reaction.
  7. 7.
    >…
  8. 8.
    >Nothing.
  9. 9.
    >*Yawn*
  10. 10.
    >"I guess I'll just have to finish this experiement tomorrow."
  11. 11.
    >The purple p0ny huffs out of her workroom, leaving her little experiment to pulsate alone in the dark.
  12. 12.
    "Ha ha ha ha ha…"
  13. 13.
    >Your form silently shifts back into it's usual discordant physique, and you gleefully toss the lampshade from your disguise off frame.
  14. 14.
    >As you wring your hands menacingly, the Chaos Worms take note of their master and begin to spell out a phrase.
  15. 15.
    >HEY_BOSS
  16. 16.
    "Not very poetic. I'm frozen in stone for… how many years?"
  17. 17.
    >*Slither*
  18. 18.
    >1,037
  19. 19.
    "Right, 1,037 years- and that's all you have to say?"
  20. 20.
    >MEH
  21. 21.
    "Ooh, I have missed my sarcastic slimeballs so much!"
  22. 22.
    >You pat the mound before bringing your face close to eye your minions.
  23. 23.
    "Hmm… One of these things is not like the other, one of these things is…
  24. 24.
    >A quick tap on a Chaos Worm and a bright flash later, a single worm is-
  25. 25.
    "GONE! Ah ha ha ha! This should take that pretentious princess down a peg… asus wing… *snort* or two!"
  26. 26.
    >The Chaos Worms crawl into position as you guffaw to yourself.
  27. 27.
    >1,037_YEARS_IS_A_LONG_TIME
  28. 28.
    >*Slide*
  29. 29.
    >YOUR_SENSE_OF_HUMOR
  30. 30.
    >*Slide*
  31. 31.
    >IS_OUTDATED_A_BIT
  32. 32.
    >…
  33. 33.
    >You really should teleport them into the sun for that.
  34. 34.
    >They're just lucky that you are more interested in causing some chaos, and a missing mound of mucus-eaters may cause more mayhem with Sparkle than you can manage.
  35. 35.
    >That, and Celestia didn't exactly enjoy the last time you teleported a throbbing piece of meat inside her.
  36. 36.
    >With your task completed, you give a final laugh before warping back to Canterlot.
  37. 37.
    >This should be fun.
  38. 38.
     
  39. 39.
    >*Chirp* *Chirp*
  40. 40.
    >The morning sun casts its rays over the hillside at Sweet Apple Acres prompting the birds to begin their early song.
  41. 41.
    >For you, however, work started thirty minutes ago.
  42. 42.
    >"All right, Anon. We only got three acres ta harvest today, so enjoy the slow day!"
  43. 43.
    >You chuckle quietly to yourself.
  44. 44.
    >A 'slow day' huh?
  45. 45.
    >An orange mare taps her hoof impatiently beneath you as you collect some straggler apples hanging high in a tree.
  46. 46.
    >She starts walking once you jump down and dump your small collection of fruit into the wagon behind her.
  47. 47.
    >It's hard work here on the farm, but hey, what can you say?
  48. 48.
    >You love apples.
  49. 49.
    >It's one of the few Equestrian foods that you can regularly enjoy with others, and the work manages to keep you in shape.
  50. 50.
    >Really it's a win-win.
  51. 51.
    >*Crack*
  52. 52.
    >Applejack bucks another tree, causing it's products to fall into the wagon.
  53. 53.
    >"Anon."
  54. 54.
    >You nod to the earthp0ny and swiftly climb the tree, once again picking the few remaining apples hidden amongst the leaves.
  55. 55.
    >It's nice working with AJ, she has an almost perfect buck, occasionaly missing only 3 - 5 apples per tree per kick.
  56. 56.
    >Big Mac has a better record, but is not as much fun to work with.
  57. 57.
    >Still, he's much better than Applebloom.
  58. 58.
    >The one time you worked with her, she got almost no apples on any buck.
  59. 59.
    >You snuck around the backs of the trees and hit them the same time she did to get her a better yield.
  60. 60.
    >She was just so excited that she was bouncing off the walls at the end of the day.
  61. 61.
    >Sure, you might have collapsed when you got home that night, but seeing that little filly smile so big…
  62. 62.
    >Well, sentimentality isn't something you like to devote time to.
  63. 63.
    >…
  64. 64.
    >It was worth it though.
  65. 65.
    >You return to the world of the working and jump back to the ground.
  66. 66.
    "All clean, you got 'em all that time."
  67. 67.
    >Applejack adjusts her stetson and grins.
  68. 68.
    >"Ah told ya' Ah'm gettin' better. Might not need ya' pretty soon…"
  69. 69.
    >She winks at you, letting you know that she's joking before she pulls the cart to another tree.
  70. 70.
    *Crack*
  71. 71.
    >Up you go.
  72. 72.
    >For the first few branches, everything seems fine.
  73. 73.
    >Then you see it.
  74. 74.
    >A great, big, juicy red apple, right near the top of the tree.
  75. 75.
    >You climb up next to it and pluck it with a satisfying snap.
  76. 76.
    >It's almost too beautiful for words.
  77. 77.
    >The skin texture is smooth without being glossy and the-
  78. 78.
    >*pop*
  79. 79.
    >A worm burrows out of the apple and wiggles, almost as if waving at you.
  80. 80.
    >So much for beautiful.
  81. 81.
    >You bleakly toss the apple over your shoulder, taking care to not have it fall into the wagon.
  82. 82.
    >One bad apple and such…
  83. 83.
    >"Oh, Anon! Giving me gifts already? You do move fast."
  84. 84.
    >The whole world seems to go quiet as you slowly turn to face your unsolicited guest.
  85. 85.
    >Fluttershy is licking the apple.
  86. 86.
    >Licking might not be a strong enough verb actually, slobbering seems more appropriate.
  87. 87.
    >Sensing that things are about to get wierd-
  88. 88.
    >"Mmmmm *Slurp* Mmmmmmmm"
  89. 89.
    >…
  90. 90.
    > -er, you climb down the tree.
  91. 91.
    >"What took ya' so long, Anon?"
  92. 92.
    "Sorry Applejack. Looks like you got everything in this tree too, on to the next one?"
  93. 93.
    >The farmp0ny raises an eyebrow before nodding.
  94. 94.
    >"Well alright then."
  95. 95.
    >The rest of the day goes by without incident.
  96. 96.
    >Fluttershy must have thought fruit licking or something equally stupid was your fetish.
  97. 97.
    >God, every day with that fetish crap!
  98. 98.
    >When Applejack had first described her to you, she made Fluttershy sound like some kind of p0ny Jane Goodall.
  99. 99.
    >But in reality, she's just a animal enthusiast with a creepy obsession for you.
  100. 100.
    >You might have taken it as misguided affection, but ever since the swimsuit incident she's been getting worse.
  101. 101.
    >She's woken you up at 3:00 AM before to "serenade" you.
  102. 102.
    >Others would say she tried to blow you while singing, again, at 3:00 AM.
  103. 103.
    >And the Twinkie incident-
  104. 104.
    *Gag*
  105. 105.
    >"You ok there, sugarcube?"
  106. 106.
    >Applejack places a hoof on your back and hands you a cold mug of cider.
  107. 107.
    "Heh heh, yeah."
  108. 108.
    >You take a swig of the sweet beverage.
  109. 109.
    *Glup*
  110. 110.
    "Ah~ Just, remembered something bad. How are we looking?"
  111. 111.
    >The orange farmp0ny frowns and downs a few gulps of cider from her own mug.
  112. 112.
    >"Well, the summer harvest is almost over, but we still have a fourth of the total crop ta' do."
  113. 113.
    >She sighs, frustrated, before sitting next to you on the Apple family porch.
  114. 114.
    >The glow of the setting sun transforms the orchards into beautiful shades of red and orange.
  115. 115.
    >You close your eyes and breath in the delectable scent of blossoming apples.
  116. 116.
    >Now would probably be a good time.
  117. 117.
    "Hey Applejack, I-"
  118. 118.
    >"Anon! Hey, Anon!"
  119. 119.
    >Applebloom runs around the corner of the house, dressed in a garish mask and cape.
  120. 120.
    >Behind her are her cohorts and fellow fillies, Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle.
  121. 121.
    >Both are, of course, wearing their own masks of equal, and somehow in Sweetie Belle's case; more, garishness.
  122. 122.
    >You know something bad is about to happen, but just look at those faces!
  123. 123.
    >How could you run and hide from those?
  124. 124.
    "Yes? What is it?"
  125. 125.
    >The trio arrive at the porch side and begin speaking at Mach 5.
  126. 126.
    >"We know how we can get our cutie marks!"
  127. 127.
    >"Yeah! All we need to do-"
  128. 128.
    >The orange pegasus moves to the left.
  129. 129.
    >"-is become…"
  130. 130.
    >Sweetie moves to the right.
  131. 131.
    >Each strikes a dramatic pose that would embarrass Captain Ginyu himself before screaming in unison.
  132. 132.
    >"Cutie Mark Crusader Luchadores!"
  133. 133.
    >…
  134. 134.
    >Thi-
  135. 135.
    >You-
  136. 136.
    >Wha-
  137. 137.
    >…
  138. 138.
    >Applejack's and yours stares of confusion must have been some kind of silent GO! switch, because the young p0nies spring into action.
  139. 139.
    >"Get him!"
  140. 140.
    >All three of the Cutie Mark Crusader Luchadores tackle you.
  141. 141.
    >"I, La Campana, will take his leg!"
  142. 142.
    >Sweetie Belle hugs your leg in an adorable attempt to suplex you.
  143. 143.
    >"I, Aventador de el Arco Iris, will take his stomach!"
  144. 144.
    >Scootaloo grapples with your abdomen.
  145. 145.
    >"And I, La Manzana" will take his head!"
  146. 146.
    >Applebloom tugs at your neck.
  147. 147.
    >Their antics cause you to burst out in laughter.
  148. 148.
    >"Girls, get off've Anon! He and Ah were talkin'!"
  149. 149.
    >The trio groan and release their 'strangle hold' on you.
  150. 150.
    >"We were just tryin' ta' get our cutie marks… Now we'll never know if this was how we'd do it..."
  151. 151.
    >Defeated, they hang their heads and sulk.
  152. 152.
    >Uh oh, sadness…
  153. 153.
    >Not something children should have to deal with.
  154. 154.
    "Bwa! HA! HA! You niñas thought you could defeat-"
  155. 155.
    >You quickly take of your shirt and take out your pocket knife.
  156. 156.
    >A few cuts here, a few tears there, and you've done the mask of-
  157. 157.
    "El Mono Mano!"
  158. 158.
    >You wink at Applejack and she shakes her head while chuckling.
  159. 159.
    >The CMCL's faces light up as you rush towards them, flexing theatrically all the way.
  160. 160.
    >Guess it wasn't the right time after all, but that doesn't matter…
  161. 161.
    >All three luchadores grab your right shin and attempt to lift you.
  162. 162.
    >Playing along, you and throw yourself over them, landing in a puddle of mud near the water pump.
  163. 163.
    >You can always show Applejack later.
  164. 164.
    >Laughter rolls over the hillsides as the smiling faces of three little fillies outshines even the brilliance of the evening sky.
  165. 165.
     
  166. 166.
    >[Later that night]
  167. 167.
    >"G'night Granny."
  168. 168.
    >You shut Granny Smith's door and trot over to Applebloom's room to check on her.
  169. 169.
    >She's sound asleep.
  170. 170.
    >Playing with Anon really tired her out.
  171. 171.
    >A grin spreads across your face as you return to your room for the night.
  172. 172.
    >He's really great.
  173. 173.
    >How he manages to have so much energy at the end of the day, you'll never know.
  174. 174.
    >Crawling into bed, you picture him in his silly outfit.
  175. 175.
    >White mask stained with mud and sweat.
  176. 176.
    >His strong build glistening in the sunlight…
  177. 177.
    "Woah there girl, back up!"
  178. 178.
    >You shake your head to get rid of the image.
  179. 179.
    >What are you doing?
  180. 180.
    >You can't just imagine something like THAT with someone.
  181. 181.
    >Besides, Anon would never-
  182. 182.
    >You curl up under the covers of your bed.
  183. 183.
    >With you…
  184. 184.
    >…
  185. 185.
    >At least you will see him again tomorrow.

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