-
>"Now are the two of you going to play nice or are we going to have to keep you tied up like that?"
-
"You KNOW that this wasn't my fault, Time Turner! Anon--"
-
>"Ah, ah, ah! I didn't ask for an explanation, I asked if the two of you were going to stop jumping at each other every five seconds."
-
>Your eyes narrowed as you stared up at your "friends"
-
>You wiggled around, checking to see if the ropes securing you were tight
-
>...Horse apples, they were...
-
>Mr. Cake really knew how to tie a knot...
-
>You turned to glare at Anon, who was just as tied up as you
-
>"You know, if you didn't hate fun so much we wouldn't be tied up like this," he said matter-of-factly
-
>You nearly spat
-
"And if you could CONTROL yourself for five minutes I wouldn't have to watch you like I do," you retorted
-
>Time Turner, Mr. Cake, Thunderlane and Spark Plug looked at each other
-
>"You know we can just keep judging the flanks with you tied up like this," Spark Plug pointed out. "Then we wouldn't have to stop ever five seconds
-
>Anon's eyes widened
-
>"Don't you fucking dare do that!" he said, struggling against his bonds. "Don't you cock block me like that! Don't you do it!"
-
>Anon fell onto his side, wiggling around like a worm
-
>Rolling his eyes, Mr. Cake walked over and placed a hoof on his back, holding him in place
-
>"We won't as long as you Pinkie Promise to stop with all of your horse apples. We're all starting to have fun and you two are ruining it."
-
>Anon froze at that
-
>"...Really?"
-
>The fellas nodded and Anon grimanced
-
>Regret washed over his features as he looked down at the ground
-
>"...Alright then, I'll be good. And I'm sorry. Just untie me and I'll go ahead and do the Pinkie Promise."
-
>Mr. Cake and the rest smiled at that
-
>"Don't worry, Anon dear, we know that you just get excited easily," Mr. Cake kindly said, leaning down to untie him
-
-
>Time Turner walked over to you, an eyebrow raised
-
"..."
-
>"..."
-
"I'm not apologizing."
-
>"We're not asking you to apologize," Time Turner said with a shrug. "We just want you to promise that you'll quit fighting."
-
>...
-
>Buck it
-
>You weren't going to lay here tied up all day
-
"Fine. But I want to see Anon do the Pinkie Promise first."
-
>"I promise that I'll be good and I'll do my best to stave off the booty lust. Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye."
-
>Looking over you could see Anon going through the motions with Pinkie Pie standing right next to him
-
>Which was even better
-
>Nopony wanted to break a Pinkie Promise if they could help it but you DOUBLY didn't want to break it if Pinkie was there to witness it
-
>...
-
>You remember the last time somepony broke a Pinkie Promise that was done in front of the party pony
-
>...
-
>It didn't end well...
-
>A happy noise escaped Pinkie's throat as Anon finished up by lightly poking his eye
-
>"Yay! Now we can get back to inspecting butts!" the pink pony chirped, hopping into Anon's lap
-
>The human's hands twitched, and for a second you though that he was about to sign his own death warant as his hands drifted down to her flank
-
>But, in a remarkable show of willpower (for him at least), Anon just placed his hands in the middle of the mare's back, giving her a little hug
-
>...
-
"Alright, untie me. I'll do the stupid Pinkie Promise."
-
>After you were untied and your oath was struck and Pinkie got out of Anon's lap you and the fellas turned back to the remaining Pegasi, all of whom were waiting impatiently for you to get on with it
-
-
>And get to it you did
-
>Since Anon had been cowed with the threat of a Pinkie Promise being held over his head you and the fellas got to take over for most of the judging
-
>Though a part of you thinks that Anon just wasn't that much of a fan of smaller flanks and didn't want to spend that much time on them
-
>And, being an earth pony, you could understand that
-
>But, as time went on and you got to judging more and more flanks you started to get an appreciation for pegasi butt
-
>You liked the firmness
-
>You liked that the better ones were just big enough to play with but not big enough to drown in
-
>You also liked how tight and perky they were
-
>If you didn't know that your parents would KILL you if you herded with a pegasus you might have tried to get one of your own
-
>You had to give it to Anon: he was really right when he said that pegasi were compact
-
>"Nah; you boys keep those hooves away from these buns."
-
>You and the fellas frowned as Blossomforth stared at you resolutely
-
>The mare had her neck bent at an impossible angle as she did this, not moving the rest of her body at all
-
>You knew that Blossom was a contortionists but it was still weird seeing a pony bend like that
-
>The mare knew this, which was probably why she was doing it; partially to look at you and partially to keep you away
-
>And it worked
-
>You weren't getting near her while she was doing... THAT
-
>"How are we going to judge you then?" Thunderlane demanded. "We HAVE to poke at your rump!"
-
>Snorting, Blossom nudged her head toward Anon
-
>"I don't want YOU touching my flank; I want that one over there to do it," she said, licking her lips
-
>Mr. Cake's nose scrunched up
-
>"Sweetie, even though Anon here is an expert on flanks I'm sure we can--"
-
>"Not a single one of you has made a mare cum; he has," Blossom interrupted. "So I want him and those spider-hooves of his to work their magic on me."
-
>...
-
>Ew
-
>Now remembered why you didn't like to hang around this mare...
-
-
>Giving her flank a quick once over you checked to see if you could give her a super low score like you had with Rainbow Dash
-
>...
-
>Shoot, you don't think so... and, since there's not really any rules against Blossom's demand, you couldn't just kick her out...
-
>You all looked at Anon
-
>You could see that a single bead of sweat was dripping down the human's forehead
-
>...
-
>Looking back you could see that Blossom was also staring at Anon
-
>...Though she had folded herself so that she was looking at him with her head tucked in between her back legs
-
>...He was doomed
-
>"Come on, Anon," she cooed, giving her rump a shake as she gave Anon her best bedroom eyes. "You know you want to give these buns a squeeze~"
-
>Anon's hands opened and closed, and he looked over at Pinkie
-
>The mare pointed at him, mouthing the word "FOREVER!" at him
-
>Nevertheless, since he was a "professional", Anon stepped up and kneeled down
-
>"Alright, super bendy pone," Anon said nervously. "If you'd assume a more normal position I can get on with the judging."
-
>Blossomforth giggled, unbending herself so that she was standing regularly
-
>"There you go sweetheart," she purred, her tail flicking out of the way
-
>Not being made out of stone, you walked over and placed a hoof on his shoulder
-
>Thunderlane also made his presence known, pressing himself against the human
-
>Even though you weren't too happy with your friend right now you were going to be with him through this
-
>Because that's what friends do: make sure that their buddies don't lose their minds and break a Pinkie Promise because of a REALLY flexible mare that just wants to get off
-
>...
-
>Friendship was weird...
-
>Giving you both a weak smile, Anon grabbed the edges of Blossom's panties and tenderly pulled them down
-
>Blossom bit her lip as he did so, her tail flicking back and forth
-
>"Come on, hot stuff, don't be shy~"
-
>As Anon let her panties drop to the stage Blossom's tail flicked again, giving you an... eyeful
-
-
>With a tense, jerky motion Anon's hands found themselves on Blossom's rump
-
>"A-Alrighty then. Lets--"
-
>"Aha~"
-
>"--Let's get judging."
-
>Anon's fingers dug into the mare's flank, squeezing and tugging and pulling
-
>He didn't leave an inch of Blossom's rump untouched, much to the mare's delight
-
>Though you could tell that he wasn't enjoying it as much as he probably wanted to
-
>But a Pinkie Promise was a Pinkie Promise, and he wasn't going to break one
-
>Every few seconds Blossom would let out a groan or flick her tail out of the way or give her rump a wiggle, trying to rile up Anon anyway that she could
-
>And throughout all of her teasing you had to give it to Anon
-
>He actually DID handle it very well
-
>Even when he was rubbing his face against the mare's flank and Blossom was making enough noise to wake the dead he didn't break\
-
>Though you were ready to give Blossom a piece of your mind
-
>And it looked like you weren't alone
-
>By the time it was all over, there were about a dozen or so mares GLARING at Blossom, some of them muttering angrily amongst themselves
-
>Hopefully Blossom would get her flank kicked after this was over...
-
>You and the fellas were feeling... less than comfortable and Anon looked like he had just gotten back from a war zone
-
TO make matters worse there was a puddle of... juices at Blossom's hooves
-
>...Ew...
-
>"Alright, i-it looks like w-we got our first t-ten outta t-ten," Anon said, reaching into his back pocket and pulling out his marker
-
>His hand shook as he brought the marker and put a ten on her flank
-
>Blossom, sweaty and breathing hard, let out a breathless giggle as she looked back at the number written down on her bottom
-
>"Oh! Awesome!" she chirped, giving her rump one final shake. "Looks like I'll be a finalist then and--"
-
>You ignored whatever else the mare said as you watched Anon walk over to you like a zombie
-
>He stopped a few feet from you and sat down, and without a second thought you all crowded around him
-
-
"I'm proud of you, Anon," you said, patting him on the shoulder. "That must not have been easy."
-
>"Yeah, epecially with Blossom acting like a bucking slut," Time Turner said, giving the pegasus a glare
-
>Blossomforth just giggled, making kissy faces at him
-
>The bitch...
-
"Do you need a minute to collect yourself?" you kindly asked
-
>Anon nodded, and without saying a word he gave you his marker, his unfocused eyes staring at nothing and everything
-
>...
-
>He'd be alright...
-
>Turning back toward the row of mares you looked around
-
"Alright, who's next?" you asked
-
>And that was when you saw it
-
>The flank of the hottest, most sought after mare in all of Ponyville
-
>A flank which was lacking a number
-
>Some say that when she was born Celestia herself began to weep tears of both joy and sorrow
-
>Others say that when she was little she managed to stop a raging Ursa Major with nothing but a rubber band and two pencils
-
>The mare before you was breathtaking in every way
-
>She was a goddess of beauty
-
>A model of mareliness
-
>Somepony who you didn't have a snowballs chance of ever herding with, no matter how much you wanted that dream to come true
-
>Motherbucking Derpy Hooves
-
>"Hiya, Caramel!" the mare chirped, the golden diamonds that were her eyes settling on you
-
>You couldn't help but giggle as you hid you face with a hoof so that she wouldn't see you blushing
-
>She... She knew your name!
-
"Hiya, D-Derpy," you managed to say, trying and failing not to swoon
-
>You take back what you said about your parents being mad about you bringing a pegasus home
-
>If your moms and dad saw you bringing one like this home they'd be so proud that you'd sure that they'd burst to pieces
-
>Oh you'd bet that Derpy would take you to the NICEST places whenever you want out on dates
-
>You could see yourself now: your mom walking you down the aisle
-
>Derpy would be right there with a big smile--
-
>"So are you gonna be the one to judge my bottom?" Derpy asked, knocking you right out of your WONDERFUL fantasy
-
-
>Not that you were made at her for doing it
-
>You could NEVER be mad at her...
-
>Never ever
-
>And that's when it hit you
-
>You were going to be TOUCHING Derpy's flank
-
>You were going to lay your hooves on one of the hottest mares in all of Ponyville, if not the world!
-
>...
-
>You take back what you said
-
>Anon was the best
-
>He was the best for setting this up and you were thrilled to be here
-
>THIS WAS THE BEST DAY EVER!
-
>A squee escaped your throat, but you managed to (mostly) cover it up by loudly clearing your throat
-
"Y-Yep, I'll be look--ugh!"
-
>"Actually, ALL of us are gonna judge you, Derpy," Thunderlane said, shoving his hoof into--
-
>Ew...
-
>You can taste where his hooves have been...
-
>The fellas all crowed around you, Mr. Cake, included, slightly too big smiles on their faces
-
>Whoo
-
>Way to let the hay fall out of your pockets boys...
-
>Derpy blinked, the act making your heart flutter, before she smiled, which almost made you want to get down on your knees and worship this fine, fine, FINE specimen
-
>"Okie dokie!" she chirped presenting her dfkjvbsldfjb!
-
>...
-
>Shaking your head, you quickly wiped the drool that was making its way down your chin
-
>Keep it together, Caramel!
-
>KEEP IT TOGETHER, COLT!
-
>THISISYOURONEANDONLYBUCKINGCHANCE!
-
>There was some pushing, a bit of biting and some shoving as you all tried to make your way over to Derpy but, as luck would have it, you wound up face-to-face with the famous bubble butt
-
>A flank that was hoof crafted by Faust herself whilst a chorus of angels sang
-
>And it was PERFECT
-
>Though pretty much every mare had elected to wear a pair of panties Derpy had wisely chosen to walk the road less traveled and wear nothing at all
-
>OhsweetbabyLunalookatit!
-
>Youweren'tworthy!
-
>You covered your mouth with your hooves
-
>From beside you you could hear Thunderlane gasp
-
>A thud from your left signaled that the sight of the PERFECT flank had been too much for Spark Plug
-
-
>And while you felt yourself getting lightheaded, your heart POUNDING in your chest, you nevertheless reached out to touch Derpy's bottom
-
>The bottom to end all bottoms
-
"A-Alright. Here w-we go..."
-
>Though you were barely touching her bottom you could feel yourself slipping out of your sheath
-
>The softness of her fur...
-
>The perkiness...
-
>The bounciness...
-
>Her cutiemarks...
-
>Even her smell...
-
>You bit your lip as you let your hooveswander up and down the jaw-dropping bubble butt before you
-
>At first your pokes and touches were light, but as time went on you got more and more daring and rougher and rougher with your groping
-
>"O-Oh... That's nice," Derpy murmured, pressing her butt against your hoof. "Keep squeezing like that~"
-
>Your breath caught in your throat as your cock slapped against your belly
-
>OhsweetCelestiayouweresobuckinghardrightnow!
-
>Out of the corner of your eye you watched as Thunderlane, whose lil' Thunder was twitching against his stomach, reached over and touched Derpy's butt
-
>"Wow," he breathed, a blush on his face. "Look at it..."
-
>He gave Derpy's flank a squeeze
-
>Derpy, her wings slowly extending, let out another moan, her tail flicking out of the--ddfkjvnldfvfbvdkjf!
-
>You bit your lip hard as your stallionhood twitched
-
>"I love my wife, I love my wife, I love my wife," you could heard Mr. Cake chant from behind you
-
>To right you could see Time Turner's hoof reaching out to Touching Derpy's buns as well
-
>Derpy's rump flexed and she wiggled it around
-
>Ohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh!
-
>Don'tyoubuckingcumstallion!
-
>Don'tyoubuckingdoit!
-
>Not trusting yourself not to lose it, you didn't lean in and nuzzle Derpy's rump
-
>...Even though you really, really, REALLY wanted to...
-
>Instead you, with your cock out for all to see, uncapped Anon's marker and silently put a ten on Derpy's flank
-
-
>Derpy looked back at her rump with a smile
-
>"Aw, neat!" she chirped. "Thank's Caramel!"
-
>From beside you, Thunderlane hit the floor, out like a light
-
>Your eyes widened as Derpy turned around
-
>Oh no...
-
>She lifted up a hoof
-
>Oh sweet Celestia no...
-
>She assumed the booping position
-
>OH SWEET CELESTIA, LUNA, CADENCE, AND TWILIGHT NO!
-
>You stood there frozen as Derpy's hoof made its way toward your snoozle
-
>Your cock twitched, a bit of precum splashing against the floor
-
>You knew what was going to happen
-
>The second that Derpy touched your nose you were going to cum and you were going to do it HARD
-
>If that happened, and if you soaked Derpy like you were guessing that you were going to do, you were going to be the laughingstock of Ponyville
-
>You'd have to skip town, change your name, work as a stripper in some rundown donkey strip club
-
>...Just like what happened with your cousin...
-
>You tried to move out of the way with all of your might, to stop this travesty in the making, but you couldn't
-
>Derpy's bewitching gaze held you firmly in place
-
>You couldn't look away from those golden eyes; you were trapped
-
>This was it... this was when your social life died complete--
-
>"Easy there Derpy. You're about to kill the poor guy."
-
>Before Derpy's hoof touched your nose a hand blocked its way
-
>Both you and Derpy looked up to see Anon standing right there, looking a good deal more collected than he had before
-
>...
-
>Derpy smiled
-
>"Hiya, Anon!" she said, waving her hoof around
-
>You let out a sigh, nearly flopping to the ground in relief
-
>Oh by Luna's flaming teats was that a close one...
-
>Anon smiled at the mailmare
-
>"So it looks like you got a ten out of ten huh?"
-
-
>Derpy nodded with a happy--
-
>NO!
-
>LOOK AWAY FROM HER, CARAMEL!
-
>LOOK AWAY FROM HER!
-
>YOU WERE GOING TO LOSE IT IF YOU CONTINUED TO STARE AT PERFECTION LIKE THIS!
-
>"Yep! It looks like my bottom was a good one!"
-
>Anon ruffled the mare's mane, making her giggle, before he leaned down and grabbed both you and Thunderlane, carrying you away from Derpy
-
>You were silent as Anon set you down and he started trying to wake up Thunderlane
-
"I... I think I understand you now, Anon," you said after a minute. "I think I understand why you're so bucking crazy all the time."
-
>"Just give it a minute or two, Caramel. The first bout of booty madness is hard for everone," Anon said, slapping Thunderlane in the face
-
>The stallion's eyes shot open
-
>"Who?! What?! Where?!"
-
>You watched as Anon sat the pegasus down, more dropped him really, and stood up
-
>He turned and smiled down at you
-
>It was a knowing smile, a understanding smile
-
>You had just walked a mile in Anon's shoes and he was delighted that you did
-
>You were... conflicted, and still ACHINGLY hard, but mostly conflicted
-
>"Why don't I get the rest of the mares while you and the other guys calm yourselves down a little bit?" Anon suggested, ruffling your mane
-
>You didn't even bother to slap away his hoof, simply nodding
-
"...You do that."
-
>Hoofing Anon his marker back you looked over at the crowd of mares that you JUST remembered were watching you
-
>...
-
>They were all staring at your junk weren't they?
-
>For a moment you consider covering yourself up but you just can't seen to gather up the will to do so
-
>Buck it
-
>Your beliefs had just been turned upside down staring at that flank
-
>You could be horrified later
-
>AFTER you survived all of... THIS
-
>...Yeah
-
-
>By the time you and the boys had recovered you noticed that Anon had finished with the last of the pegasi
-
>To your surprise the number of ten's was a lot smaller than the earth pony group
-
>There was that BITCH Blossomforth, D-Derpy and...
-
>"Hello boys~" CloudChaser cooed, wiggling her rump at you
-
>Urgh...
-
>You and the boys stared up at Anon, who shrugged
-
>"Hey, whatever you think about her she has a nice butt," he told all of you
-
>...
-
>Horse apples...
-
>She does
-
"Alright, what are we gonna do for these finalists?" you asked
-
>Anon grinned
-
>"I'm glad that you asked!" he said, clapping his hands together. "Hey ladies! Could you bring up those bricks up here please?"
-
>...Bricks?
-
>Following Anons gaze you watched as a group of earth ponies started to carry a bunch of bricks onto the stage, stacking them on top of each other
-
>Anon turned toward the crowd
-
>"Even though pegasi are a lot smaller and a good deal weaker than their earth pony counterparts that doesn't mean that they're fragile!" he said. "In fact, if you don't count alicorns, pegasi are probably the most durable of the races."
-
>You eyed the bricks carefully
-
>To be honest they didn't look anything out of the ordinary
-
>They might have been a little thicker than an average brick but other than that they looked normal...
-
>"A pegasus can break the sound barrier, lose control, hit the ground and walk away from it with barely a limp. Everything from the tips of their snouts to their rumps are made to take one hell of a beating."
-
>Anon smiled as some of the mares in the crowd jeered good naturedly at the double entendre
-
>"And not only can they take one hell of a beating they can dish it out too! I'm sure many of you have had a pegasus smash through your wall or fuck up your mail box once upon a time."
-
>You frowned
-
>...Bucking Rainbow Dash
-
-
>That jerk STILL hadn't offered to pay you for your mailbox...
-
>"And that destructive power is what we're gonna test here. What we're gonna have these ladies--"
-
-
CRACK!
-
-
>A thunderous crack unlike any that you had ever heard before came from behind you
-
>The stage and the very earth below it shook so hard that you, the fellas, Anon and some of the mares in the crowd lost their footing
-
>WHATTHEBUCKWASTHAT?!
-
>ISTHISANEARTHQUAKE?!
-
>You covered your head and closed your eyes, waiting for whatever this was to pass
-
>When it did you picked up your head and opened your eyes
-
>You could see every single mare in the crowd looking past you with surprise, shock and mystification
-
>Confused as to why they were looking where they were looking you looked over your shoulder
-
>Derpy was sitting human-style on a stack of bricks, her keister hanging off their edge
-
>The stack was about thirty stacks high and every single one of them was split down the middle
-
>The wooden floorboards all around the bricks were cracked as well, some of them were even completely snapped in half
-
>You hadn't the foggiest clue as to how Derpy managed to sit on those broken bricks like that without falling off
-
>...
-
>How the HAY did she do that?
-
>She was--
-
>They did--
-
>Why would--
-
>Derpy, who was humming a little tune to herself as she kicked her back legs, completely oblivious to the destruction that she had just caused, noticed that you were all staring at her
-
>She looked at all of you, then she looked at all the damage, before she grinned sheepishly
-
>"Oops... sorry. These bricks just looked like such a good place to sit--"
-
"Derpy wins."
-
-
>Anon slowly nodded, looking just as confused and as shocked as the rest of you
-
>"Yep, Derpy wins."
-
>"Derpy wins," Thunderlane said
-
>"Yep," Mr. Cake and Spark Plug said
-
>Time Turner nodded as well
-
>"She wins as long as she keeps that rump away from me."
-
>...Heresy
-
>You'd die HAPPY if it meant getting a face full of that rump...
-
>Derpy looked at all of you before a huge smile came to her face
-
>"Yeah!" she cried, throwing her hooves in the air
-
>In doing so she lost her balance and fell off the bricks with a yelp butt fi--
-
>Oh sweet Celestia no!
-
>From behind you the crowd shouted as Anon launched himself forward
-
"Anonbuckingcatchher!"
-
>"I'mgoingtoCaramel!"
-
"Don'tletherhitthebuckinggroundIDON'TWANTTODIE!"
-
>You would have liked to say that he made it
-
>But he didn't
-
>...
-
>He didn't
by lapsbin
by lapsbin
by lapsbin
by lapsbin
by lapsbin