Anon gets into a fight


                                            Transferred from https://pastebin.com/UnWp0GuF

                                            Originally published JAN 4TH, 2016


                                            >You are Anon and you are on your off day.

                                            >It's not like 'independent contractors' (fix-it colts, as mares say) had days-off,

                                            >but, aside from emergencies, nobody wanted to schedule repairs for the weekend.

                                            >In a place with no vidya or [spoiler]reddit[/spoiler], this left you with plenty of free time.

                                            >Back home, getting out to a park with a good book was a rare event, but here,

                                            >in a small town in the middle of nowhere, you were practically living in a park.

                                            >Outdoors study became your weekly ritual. Gotta stay educated in a hostile world.

                                            >A month ago it was modern horse history, last week you brushed up on

                                            >wilderness survival and poisonous plants, today it was time for a bit of sociology.

                                            >But now the day was coming to an end. You finished reading by sunset,

                                            >but the second best study hill was just too good to leave immediately.

                                            >Staying the night outside wasn't an option, however.

                                            >It was time to go home.


                                            >Unlike the sleepless cities, both the ones back home and the larger ones here,

                                            >the town of Ponyville liked to sleep a lot. It slept in late in the morning,

                                            >took a nap in the afternoon, and then settled for an early bedtime in the early evening.

                                            >By the time you decided to drag your lazy ass back home,

                                            >the only place showing any signs of activity was the local bar.

                                            >The streets were empty and lifeless.

                                            >...

                                            >As if it mattered.

                                            >At least it would allow you to get home faster,

                                            >no small night-blind horses bumping into your knees all the time.

                                            >And so you walk on through, humming a merry tune

                                            >[spoiler]"We slept in rocket silos and we can't wait any more -  Whoa![/spoiler]

                                            >Not even noticing the three mares that were following you.

                                            >Surprisingly, hooves on dirt can be pretty quiet.


                                            >Even the strike that hit you in your hip and made you tumble into a back-alley was pretty quiet, all things considered.


                                            ------


                                            >You try to get up

                                            "Fuck"

                                            >That fucking hurt.

                                            >Still, the leg isn't bent or something, so nothing's broken, probably?

                                            "Hey, what the fuck just happened? Don't you ever watch where you're going?"

                                            >"I know exactly where I'm going, ape"

                                            >Oh shit. The voice... that's her.

                                            >Pile Driver

                                            >It was obvious that the hit wasn't an accident, but why did she have to snap first?..

                                            >The rush of adrenaline gets you back on your feet like magic.

                                            >"Oh, you don't need to get up for my sake, it would be easier to have our talk eye to eye."

                                            >Flanking her are two other mares. One of them, Monkey Wrench, is a plumber who you've been putting out of a job.

                                            >The other one you are seeing for the first time .

                                            "I -ow- prefer the term 'monkey' myself. It sounds like something cute, small, nimble and playful."

                                            >the plumber explodes in anger

                                            > "You fucking dick, you think you can just walk in! and fuck everything up! and then you mock me?

                                            >   I've done been fixing the fucking shit in this town for fifteen years, and now I'm supposed to fuck of without a single thanks?"

                                            "Ponies wouldn't be calling me to fix your shoddy work if you deserved anything."

                                            >Oh shit, you done goofed, she is gonna charge

                                            >The third one steps in: "Come on Mon, you won't do any good by kicking his ribs in. We gotta educate him!"

                                            >And the head-bitch: "Yes. Like he educated my naive little brother."

                                            > "You know, I was going to let much slide, I don't care if you play around with everything that has a cunt,

                                            >   I didn't care what job you did, but now you tried to ruin my brother's life with your filth.

                                            >   You shouldn't have touched Auger. You shouldn't have fed him lies. Now you're gonna regret it. "

                                            "Is that your penis envy speaking, 'Pile' Driver?"

                                            >...

                                            >...shouldn't have said that.


                                            ------


                                            >You are Anon in FuckedUpQuestria

                                            >Behind you is a wall, to the both sides are shops, closed down for the night.

                                            >In your mouth you've got a very loose tongue (blame the adrenaline from the hit).

                                            >In front of you are three very angry earth pony mares

                                            >It's their turn, and the most pissed-off mare of the three is trotting towards you.

                                            >She has reared up...

                                            >Now, there is this deal with ponies, especially earthies.

                                            >They are not very fast, and dodging their hoofy-kicks and bucks is easy.

                                            >But behind each strike that Wrench throws you can feel a wrongness, as if the physics of this world creak and groan.

                                            >Watching them at work is one thing, but feeling the air tug on your body as her hoof sails past...

                                            >As if a truck zipped by. Fuck this shit. You need to end this.

                                            >"Oh just sit down so we can have a chat!"

                                            >Pile flanked you. Dodging her buck almost had you back on your ass.

                                            >Time to employ the most advanced self-defense tactic you know...


                                            >...strike, run away and get help.

                                            >Your heart is thumping like an over-revved engine.

                                            >So you kick the head bitch in the face.

                                            >Your boot impacts it with a satisfying pomf.

                                            >Slap Monkey Wrench on the ear.

                                            >She recoils in pain.

                                            >Now would be the time to run away, but 'gentle educator' is blocking your way in a narrow spot.

                                            >She is standing next to a closed garbage container, thinking that you will have to go through her.

                                            >The container is low enough for ponies to throw trash inside.

                                            >You just vault over the thing and bail

                                            >No matter how inept they were, fighting with someone who can shatter your spine in a blink of an eye is a stupid idea.

                                            >And so you run on through the town. You desperately needed a friend right now.


                                            >...what was that?

                                            >Bon-Bon and Lyra's house!

                                            >You know for a fact that Lyra is an auxiliary guard.

                                            >Safe. You're safe.

                                            >You raise your fist to pound on the door as you yell:

                                            "Lyra! Bon! Help me!"


                                            ------


                                            >...your fist connects and the door swings open.

                                            >It wasn't even locked.

                                            >You rush in, close it behind you, and collapse to the floor.

                                            >A moment later you see Bon-Bon going quietly down the stairs,

                                            >as casual as if she is about to open shop for the day.

                                            >"Anonymous? Is this you?"

                                            "Bon, I was going home, and there were these three mares, they"

                                            >"You're limping. Did they hit you?"

                                            "--they attacked me, so I hit back, and then I just--"

                                            >...and you feel hooves gently placed on your shoulders.

                                            >"You did everything right. It's ok, you're safe now. We'll handle things from here."

                                            >...the hard keratin feels soft as a pillow.

                                            >Some more magic fuckery, you bet.

                                            >As the rush dies down, the reality of what happened starts to settle in

                                            >You just got into a three on one fight, goaded your opponents to strike,

                                            >kicked in some faces and escaped unscathed. Some hits were close though.


                                            >"Bonnie? What's the commotion? Oh, hello Anon!"

                                            >Lyra comes down the stairs, groggy and half-asleep.

                                            >"Good morning sleepyhead. Anon got jumped, and ran to us for safety."

                                            >And just like that, she is at attention

                                            >"Where did it happen? Anon, do you know who it was?"

                                            "Calm down--"

                                            > "You will have to forgive Lyra and her guard training, Anon. You know what they say about guards.

                                            >   Give them a fulcrum and they fall asleep! Sleep through anything, too! I'm surprised she even got up!"

                                            >"Bon-Bon, stop it! We've got to go and handle this!"

                                            >"No we don't. There is nopony there to handle. They probably fled as soon as Anon got here."

                                            >Bon-bon looks closely at your boots.

                                            >"By the way, thanks to Anon, identifying them won't be that hard..."

                                            >Blood.

                                            >These bitches ruined your boots.

                                            >"...but we should move out and look at the place, just in case. Anon, will you show us where it happened?"


                                            ------


                                            >When you fled, you felt like you arrived at Lyra's house within seconds.

                                            >Actually, you were at least two blocks away.

                                            >As you round the last corner, you notice that there are quite a lot of ponies standing where the fight took place.

                                            >Turns out everypony heard it, and seconds after you ran, people began gathering around.

                                            >"Do you remember anyone, Anon?"

                                            "I know two of them. It was Monkey Wrench and Pile Driver. Also some other pony that I didn't see around here.

                                            Green-yellow coat. Key-lime poofy mane. Didn't notice her mark"

                                            >"Are you sure about the first two? Can you remember something about them? Mane color?"

                                            "I know what I saw, Minty. One of them lashed out at me because I was ruining her business.

                                            The other told me not to mess with her brother Auger. I'm sure"

                                            >The third pony from tonight is still there. She is yelling at the crowd, something about an attack.

                                            "And there she is, the green one. Talking to the crowd. Same colors, recognize the voice."

                                            >"...and then that ape just ran up and bucked her, without any warning!"

                                            "HEY, CUT THE CRAP! THREW ME INTO A CORNER TO BEAT ME UP AND YOU KNOW IT!"

                                            >All eyes are on you. There are at least 20 ponies gathered.

                                            >Wrench here too, sitting in the corner... crying?

                                            >Nurse Redheart here. Not in uniform. Next to her, a pony is lying on the ground.

                                            >It's Pile Driver.

                                            >She isn't moving.

                                            >The kick, the feel of it..

                                            >You didn't kick her in the face. Too soft. You kicked her in the throat.

                                            >You kicked her in the throat and crushed her windpipe.

                                            >She suffocated while you ran away.

                                            [spoiler]You feel your sins crawling on your back[/spoiler]


                                            ------


                                            >Lyra approaches the crowd.

                                            >"Okay listen up! I'm with the guard and I will need statements from everypony here!

                                            >   Let's keep calm, do this quick and without incidents, and most of you will be free to go"

                                            >"Yeah, let's do this quick. I'll do this monster in quick! I'll do him in as quick as he did in Pile!"

                                            >Wrench charges at you in fury.

                                            >Before you can react, Bon-bon jumps in between the two of you.

                                            >She takes the first blow. It sends her flying to the side.

                                            >Holy shit. Can't run now. You need to take the madmare out.

                                            >Before you can react, however, Wrench tumbles down, her front legs twisted at unnatural angles,

                                            >hooves glued to the ground with the green glow of Lyra's aura.

                                            "Bon-Bon, are you alr--"

                                            >Bon-Bon is already up, completely unfazed by the blow.

                                            >Lyra lifts your attakcer in the air

                                            > "Does anypony else want to start a fight with the guard here? No?

                                            >   Then let's get this started"


                                            ------


                                            >As soon as the medics arrive, you are sent off to the hospital to get your injuries looked at.

                                            >Lyra said that somepony will collect your statement later, if it's necessary.

                                            >Surprisingly, some of the blows that couldn't have connected left some nice bruises.

                                            >Thanks to bullshit earth pony magic and your pale, thin skin.

                                            >Right hip looks like a dadaist painting, with splotches of red, purple, yellow and black.

                                            >You could have sworn Nurse Tenderheart became whiter when she saw it,

                                            >Every bruise and scratch is meticulously documented for the guard.

                                            >And you look like hell.

                                            >As the nurse was finishing up the report, somepony knocks on the door

                                            >"This is officer Heartstrings, may I come in?"

                                            >"No, you mustn't--

                                            "Come in, Lyra. I'm naked though, and you might not like what you see though."

                                            >"What do you mean- Oh, sweet Celestia!"

                                            >You can see her wince as if she was kicked in the stomach.

                                            "I hope you can bring me some good news"

                                            > "... Monkey Wrench told us everything. Apparently, Pile Driver and her were lovers, so... she snapped.

                                            >   She also told us that Apple Honey was with them. The third mare. She is from out of town..

                                            >	You're in the right, Anon. There will be no charges. Nopony will dare prosecute you."

                                            >Lyra drops her gaze

                                            > " Apple honey tried to deny everything, but a stallion recognized her voice... as she threatened to ..educate you.

                                            >   Anon, I'm so sorry. It is my failure. I knew what Pile and Wrench were capable of. I should have

                                            >   brought them in before this happened, I could have thought of something.."

                                            "Everything is fine. Now just let me get dressed."

                                            >"But you're hurt!"

                                            "No fractures, so I think I'm pretty fine."


                                            ------


                                            >As you exit the emergency room, you notice Bon-Bon sitting on one of the couches.

                                            >You walk up and sit next to her

                                            "Were you waiting for me here?"

                                            >Bon-Bon turns to you and smiles.

                                            >"I was. Did you show Lyra your hot alien body?"

                                            "I did, but she didn't seem to like it. You know, because of all the injuries"

                                            >"I read the report. You shouldn't have denied hospitalization, you know? You're in no state to work now."

                                            "I've had worse. I saw you fight though, you even got to fly a little. When are you checking in?"

                                            >Her smile gets just a little bit wider.

                                            > "It doesn't pay to stoically stop punches with your face. When you roll with the punches and really sell it..

                                            >  that can be helpful. An overconfident opponent is an easy target. Wins the crowd's sympathies, too."


                                            >"You seem to be taking it all in stride."

                                            "I've had worse. You seem to be taking it in stride, too. Unlike everyone else."

                                            >"I've seen worse. Ponies like to pretend stuff like murders doesn't happen, but..."

                                            >...

                                            >... you can feel your boot plunging into her flesh.. with a little crunch.

                                            >...

                                            >"Oh. Anon. Anon, stop! You did nothing wrong."

                                            >Are you a murderer? You could have prevented this.

                                            "I insulted them. I goaded them to attack--"

                                            >"They decided to attack you before any of you said a word. Speaking from experience. You couldn't have swayed them."

                                            "I didn't know you were a guard"

                                            >"I'm not"

                                            >She leans on you a little


                                            >"You know, after what happened, you can expect Lyra to be looking after you a lot more."

                                            "Won't you be looking after me too?"

                                            >Bon turns to you and looks you in the eyes.

                                            >"Oh Anon, I know I don't need to look after you. You're a big colt!"

                                            "For you"

                                            >She laughs

                                            >"No, you're just my size. But please be kind to Lyra. She can be loopy, but she's a sweet girl."

                                            >"And.. drop by if you ever need something"


                                            original prompt https://desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25456533/#q25457170