mare wink


                                            Original thread: https://boards.4channel.org/mlp/thread/37738707

                                            original author is Anon.

                                            -----


                                            >I'm passing a new law across Equestria my faithful student. All mares MUST stop winking at anonymous. The winking will cease in his presence immediately, no matter the circumstances, time of day or their own personal feelings. Its become too much of a hassle to deal with the consequences of mare's letting their clams flutter away at that poor boy. Please Twilight you have to help me enforce this law, its just...its just too much! I'm at my wits end here and I don't know of any other options!


                                            >“Wow, okay then. I mean, sheesh, really? Like, listen, I know I’m not one to usually go on talking about this sort of thing, but just *really*? A whole law *just* not to wink at Anonymous?” said Rainbow Dash.

                                            >Twilight sighed at their little table at McPoner

                                            >“Yep,” said she.“I’m afraid so.”

                                            >Rainbow shook her head at this.

                                            >Scoffed.

                                            >"Yeah? Well, I’m telling ya, Twi, that this is totally not gonna fly over well. It doesn’t even fly over with me.”

                                            >“I know,” said Twilight. “Believe me, I know…”

                                            >Twilight had ordered four hayburgers five minutes ago.

                                            >She’d barely nibbled on her first one.

                                            >That was why Rainbow grabbed one for herself, reaching across the table.

                                            >Twilight, meanwhile, continued to elaborate on her thoughts.

                                            >“But you see, that’s the thing, Rainbow Dash; I think I agree with Princess Celestia on this one! It’s not appropriate to wink at Anonymous. Especially all the time. It’s objectifying. And for all these mares just to wink at him, constantly...?”

                                            >“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” said Rainbow Dash, swallowing as not to talk with her mouth full, “look, if Anonymous really hates it that much, then why doesn’t he give us a piece of his mind, huh? Besides, it’s my choice if I wink at him, right?”

                                            >“Yes, it is,” confessed Twilight. “But it’s not appropriate.”

                                            >“But it’s also my right to wink when I’m tryna get some, right?” said Rainbow Dash.

                                            >“Well of course,” said Twilight, “but for Anonymous, it’s—”

                                            >“But what? This law or whatever is gonna restrict me and everypony else of one of their rights! I mean, even *I* know that, Twi, and I barely know about this political stuff!”

                                            >She took another bite of burger.

                                            >Twilight just deadpanned at her.

                                            >“...Rainbow. This is sexual harassment, not an act of free speech towards Anonymous.”

                                            >“Ugh! But see? That’s the point though! Don’t get me wrong, he’s a totally awesome dude, but he's just *one* hoo-man in Equestria! Besides, Rarity told me they raised our taxes last year just to finance the Royal Guard to get him a place to stay on his butt in Equestria all day. And now you’re telling me I can’t even show my freakin’ clitoris to the guy when I want to try and fuck him? Like, come on!”

                                            >Twilight glared at her friend for a minute.

                                            >And within that moment of silence which grew as the seconds ticked by, Rainbow Dash formed a smirk at Twilight, thinking she had taken a win.

                                            >Until Twilight spoke again.

                                            >“...Rainbow Dash? I meant winking as in with your *eyes*.”

                                            >“Oh!” went Rainbow Dash.

                                            >She tilted her head.

                                            >Thought for a second before nodding her head with a tight grimace.

                                            >“Yeah, no, that’s just gross. No mare should do that to a stallion.”