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original post:https://desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/25570084/#q25570084
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*original author is Anon*
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OP:
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>"Rarity please"
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>"I'm begging you..."
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>"Don't take anon away from me"
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>"He is the best thing that could have happened to me"
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"B-But darling..."
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"That's not my desicion, it's his..."
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>"B-But, I thought t-that..."
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>"I-I g-guess that's it then..."
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>"Just tell him I'm sorry"
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--
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>>25570084
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>Anon could just sit there watching in silence as he realized that ponies take their table seats positions very very seriously.
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>Rarity takes her place beside you
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"Twilight could you please pass the mashed potato" you ask, hoping to ignore the sobbing Rainbow Dash a few seats from you
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>Twilight ignores you
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"Twilight?" you ask again
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>"I'm sorry Anon but according to Equestrian table manners nopony can talk to the owner of the house"
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>"Didn't you read that book on Equestrian etiquette I sent you?"
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>That damn book was a tome
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>You'd been using it as a doorstop for weeks now
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"Alright, well, no bu-"
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>You're inturrupted as Twilight used her magic to slam your head into the table
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>You yelp in pain and lurch back
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"What the hell was that for?!"
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>"Rule 18, Section 12; nopony can start a sentence with a vowel"
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>"Oh go easy on him Twilight, he's new to this" says Applejack
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>Realising what she's just said, her expression turns to one of firm resolve as Pinkie leans over from her seat and smashes Applejack's head through the hard, mahogany table
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>"Yes! That's double points for me!" chirps Pinkie and splatters two hoof-fuls of her food onto the wall
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>"Foul!" cries Fluttershy "Double points only occur if the table is made of oak or hickory!"
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>"But we're going by the Equestrian Standard edition 4.0, not 3.5!" retorts Pinkie
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>"Arguing over rules, that's a double disqualifier!" yells Rainbow Dash and wipes away her tears before her head is mercilessly slammed into the table by Rarity
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>"Pegasi-Unicorn Bonus round!" declares Rarity and begins passionately making out with the dazed Rainbow Dash whilst the other ponies start arranging their food into as many geometric shapes as possible
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"Can someone explain to me what the fuck is going on?" you demand
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>All the ponies gasp
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>"Anon swore! Dance round initiated!" cries Twilight and slams her head into the table
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>She lifts her head, blood dripping from her nose, and levitates you into the middle of the table
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>"Dance! Dance! Dance!" the ponies chant
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>You cry as you sway from side to side and the ponies break out into loud ululating
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>Fucking ponies man
by kqaii
by kqaii
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by kqaii
by kqaii