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Vinyl shorts: And that's how I met your mother

By TiredAsShit
Created: 18th December 2020 09:57:56 PM

  1. Prompt:
  2. I want to ride on Vinyl's back.
  3.  
  4. Green:
  5. >Be Anon
  6. >Be pretty fugged up
  7. >Some might say you were acting 'inappropriately' at this little shindig.
  8. >'Some' being specifically the parents of this kids birthday party who were trying their best to push you out of their house.
  9. >The nerve of these guys, you stop by uninvited and they have the gall to get mad when you pour yourself a few drinks.
  10. >If they didn't want anyone drinking then they shouldn't have left the booze out down in the basement and locked behind a cupboard.
  11. >Needless to say, they were being poor hosts, which you informed them of.
  12. "Yoouu guyz aree being reeeal jerkz..."
  13. >"Just get out! We don't want you here!" The lady horse says, pushing you to the door.
  14. >"Who are you?!" The penis one yells into your leg.
  15. >Typical
  16. >Not wanting to stay here any longer yourself, you make for the door when something catches your eye in the backyard.
  17. "Aww whaat? Youze got a bouncy castkle? Awesome."
  18. >Turning back around, you head to the opposite door, dragging the couple behind you as they try to stop your drunken advance.
  19. >"Oh my Celestia, Maple, he's almost to the children! Get the guards!
  20. >You feel the weight leave your legs and see the man pony brace himself against the door in front of you.
  21. >"You will NOT go out there! The guards will be here any second, you'd better leave!"
  22. "Youuu can't tell me what to do! You're not me real dad!"
  23. >"Wha-"
  24. >And with that, you grab a hold of the door and fling it open, sending the father with it smashing him into the wall.
  25. "Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeers *urp* Uncle Aaanoon! Where's da birthday boy?"
  26. >A picnic table full of foals all turns to look at you, one of them answering back.
  27. >"I'm a girl!"
  28. >"Aww acourse ya are Billy!" You say, staggering over to the table.
  29. >Stopping half way, you notice there's music playing and start doing the monkey.
  30. "Aww yeah, thisz my jam!"
  31. >Looking where the music was coming from, you see a bored white unicorn looking through records.
  32. "Damn millennialsh, always lookin at their phones. Back in my day... Oh wait pony rides!"
  33. >Making your way over to the poky pony, she notices you as your shadow covers her.
  34. >She gives you an inquisitive look, which you don't answer. Instead throwing a leg over her back and grabbing a hold of her blue mane.
  35. >Being a little too tall, you have to squat down a bit, resting your weight on her back.
  36. >This makes her let out a very strained wheeze and start squirming to try and get away from you, to no avail.
  37. >Bending over, you whisper into the increasingly frantic pony's ear.
  38. "Hey baby, I'm Anon."
  39. >The mare goes rigid for a second before trying her best to buck you off of her.
  40. "Yee haw! Get a lawng little doggy!" You yell, smacking your ride on her flank a few times.
  41. >Your pony becomes more agitated, neighing fearfully and kicking out, knocking over a few speakers and chairs.
  42. >As you're taken near the main picnic table, the foals all scream and stampede out of the way before it's flipped over, sending cake and balloons everywhere.
  43. >Panting, the sweaty mare beneath you stumbles and falls over into the bouncy castle, ripping a hole in it with her horn and sending you into the air pump, smashing it.
  44. >The castle slowly deflates, covering you both in its rubbery confines.
  45. >Not long after, you are dragged out from beneath the castle and put into restraints, two guard ponies holding you up by the armpits.
  46. >"Thank you for calling us ma'am, we'll get this troublemaker out of your mane."
  47. >"No thank /you/, I'm just happy none of my babies got hurt."
  48. >You feel the ground move under you as you're dragged from the backyard and through the house, mostly out of it and a little woozy.
  49. >"Into the chariot Anon, the princess is gonna want a word with you."
  50. >Cracking your eyes open a little more, you try to focus as you are lifted and thrown into the backseat of what must be a pony version of a cruiser.
  51. >Doing your best not to vomit from the movement, you sit up, looking back at the house you came from.
  52. >Watching you was the horse family, the foals looking at you with fear, the mom smug, and the dad nursing a bloody nose.
  53. >As the chariot begins to leave, you take a last look at the music pony, covered in a blanket and staring right at you with a blush on her face.
  54. >Did she just mouth 'call me'?
meme

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