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Flanking Maneuvers Episode 9: B Side.

By Mandroid
Created: 2020-12-19 13:15:18
Expiry: Never
anoncelestiasafecomedy/aie/

  1. 1.
    =Flanking Maneuvers Episode 9=
  2. 2.
     
  3. 3.
    >You skipped along the Canterlot streets, happy as could be.
  4. 4.
    >It was barely after ten, but you had already made your day.
  5. 5.
    >Today had been the culmination of weeks of planning and pranking Celestia.
  6. 6.
    >You had been hiding them all over the city.
  7. 7.
    >Along the walls.
  8. 8.
    >In the shops.
  9. 9.
    >Over roofs and under bridges.
  10. 10.
    >Even got a few on the top of the castle.
  11. 11.
    >Dildos.
  12. 12.
    >Hundreds upon hundreds of dildos, spread all over Canterlot where Celestia would see.
  13. 13.
    >She had, to your shock and surprise, actually gotten rid of most of her prosthetics when the two of you got married.
  14. 14.
    >Most.
  15. 15.
    >Six boxes of plastic dongs and a couple late night snooping sessions had lead to one of your greatest pranks ever.
  16. 16.
    >And it all got capped off this morning at breakfast when Celly found a plastic cock baked into her bread.
  17. 17.
    >The look on her face was priceless, you couldn't tell if she wanted to just eat around it or swallow the whole thing.
  18. 18.
    >She had stormed off after you started laughing and left her breakfast sitting there, apparently locking herself in the Magi tower.
  19. 19.
    >You glanced over at said tower, it was lit up like a Christmas tree like it always was.
  20. 20.
    >Except this time, the antenna on top was glowing like no tomorrow, gathering up magical energy.
  21. 21.
    >That...wasn't supposed to happen...
  22. 22.
    >A pink crack of lightning strikes the tip of the tower and sends a wave of magic over the city.
  23. 23.
    >You raise your arms over your face as the wave tosses you back.
  24. 24.
    >Voices around you cry out in shock asking "what happened?" over and over.
  25. 25.
    >Your entire body stings as you push yourself up off the ground... and...
  26. 26.
    >You look down and see them, your mind not believe it.
  27. 27.
    "WHY DO I HAVE TITS!?"
  28. 28.
    -Theme song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XmGkfWDtv78-
  29. 29.
     
  30. 30.
    >You stormed through the palace.
  31. 31.
    "WHERE IS HE? WHERE IS HE!?"
  32. 32.
    >You were a feral tiger on the hunt, and you knew just the kind of blood you wanted.
  33. 33.
    >You reached out and grabbed a royal guard by the scruff of her armor.
  34. 34.
    "WHERE IS MY HUSBAND?"
  35. 35.
    >She timidly points a hoof down the hall, towards your room.
  36. 36.
    >You toss her away and go kick the door open, he's standing there with that shit eating grin of his.
  37. 37.
    "SOLARIIIIIIIIIIS!"
  38. 38.
    >He turns and flashes a smile to you.
  39. 39.
    >"Hello darling! How are yo-"
  40. 40.
    >You grab his face and shut him up.
  41. 41.
    "I'M GOING TO KILL AND EAT YOU."
  42. 42.
    >His smile twists into a smarmy grin.
  43. 43.
    >"In what order~?"
  44. 44.
    >You grab his horn and tilt his head down so you can look into his eyes.
  45. 45.
    "Fix. This."
  46. 46.
    >He chuckles. "I don't know if I can."
  47. 47.
    >What.
  48. 48.
    >WHAT.
  49. 49.
    "WHAAAAAAT?!"
  50. 50.
    >"Who is shouting in here!?" A navy alicorn behind you yelled.
  51. 51.
    "SHUT UP ORION!"
  52. 52.
    >You turn back to your husband.
  53. 53.
    "What do you mean you "don't know if you can"?"
  54. 54.
    >Solly smiles. "Just that dear, the spell seemed to...misfire. I can't say this gender swapping effect was what I had in mind."
  55. 55.
    >That might explain why even your thoughts were flipped.
  56. 56.
    >Wait.
  57. 57.
    "What WAS the effect you wanted?"
  58. 58.
    >Solly smiles.
  59. 59.
    >"Irritable bowel syndrome dear, honest."
  60. 60.
    >Brilliant...
  61. 61.
     
  62. 62.
    >You, Solaris and Orion were all crammed into a carriage heading towards Ponyville.
  63. 63.
    >You sat with your arms crossed as the sky outside whizzed by.
  64. 64.
    >Solaris spent the entire time staring at your chest.
  65. 65.
    "Fuck off."
  66. 66.
    >"Whatever do you mean, dear?"
  67. 67.
    "I mean I said I wasn't taking my tits out when we were at the castle and I'm not taking them out here."
  68. 68.
    >He nuzzles against your cheek.
  69. 69.
    >"Oh but darling...this is a once in a lifetime opportunity! Aren't you the least bit...curious?" He says.
  70. 70.
    >No.
  71. 71.
    >No you were not.
  72. 72.
    "Solly...your brother is RIGHT THERE."
  73. 73.
    >Orion sat in his seat on the far side of carriage, red faced as can be.
  74. 74.
    >"This...is what I get for seeing Pippy, isn't it?"
  75. 75.
    "Shut up Orion."
  76. 76.
    >He leans back in and begins trying to nibble at your ear.
  77. 77.
    >"See? He has no right to complain with the things he does..."
  78. 78.
    >The world was not prepared for your spouse with testosterone flooding his brain.
  79. 79.
    >But there was one thing that it was less prepared for.
  80. 80.
    >You. PMS'ing.
  81. 81.
    >Your hand shoots up and snatches Solaris' tongue from his mouth.
  82. 82.
    "Solly, if you utter another word about us having sex in this carriage, I'm going to rip this out."
  83. 83.
    >"'Ut iss 'ould 'e a o'y 'ime 'e 'ath 'oo 'y i'!"
  84. 84.
    "I don't care if this is the only time we have to try this! I am not letting you fuck me after you turned me into a boiling tub of estrogen!"
  85. 85.
    >Solaris yanks his tongue back into his mouth and pouts in the seat next to you.
  86. 86.
    >"You're fine with sleeping with me when you're a man but the second I turn you into a woman it's "Keep that thing away from me!"."
  87. 87.
    "...Yeah, that's how normal couples work."
  88. 88.
    >The carriage is silent...
  89. 89.
    >"...Pippy and I don't work like that."
  90. 90.
    "SHUT UP ORION."
  91. 91.
     
  92. 92.
    >You open the door to the Ponyville Library.
  93. 93.
    "Dusk! You better be able to fix this crap!"
  94. 94.
    >Dusk Shine trots down the stairs from his second floor, Stiletto the dragon on his back.
  95. 95.
    >"You guys too, huh?"
  96. 96.
    >"I'm afraid so, my faithful student..." Solaris said.
  97. 97.
    >You could care less that Solaris didn't want to tell Dusk he did this, whatever, he'll get his later.
  98. 98.
    >You just wanted your balls back.
  99. 99.
    >"That Mo'?" A voice from the basement asked.
  100. 100.
    >Ahttp://www...her too?
  101. 101.
    "Hey Ann."
  102. 102.
    >The two of you embrace in the library.
  103. 103.
    "How's Blitz taking it?"
  104. 104.
    >"Amazed at his new appendage, how bout you two?"
  105. 105.
    >You glance at your husband and narrow your eyes.
  106. 106.
    "We're dealing..."
  107. 107.
    >Solaris clears his throat.
  108. 108.
    >"Yes, well, why don't we get started trying to solve this dilemma?" He says.
  109. 109.
    >He turns to Dusk and Ann.
  110. 110.
    >"I believe the spell was a transmogrification wave sent across the Angel spectrum."
  111. 111.
    >"How could this get on the Angel spectrum!? The power requirements would be enormous!"
  112. 112.
    >"But if it -IS- on the Angel Spectrum..."
  113. 113.
    >"...Then the Princes' using their magic on a Riselem Ankh hooked up to a transmitter should reverse the effects!"
  114. 114.
    >They were talking a different language when they were like this.
  115. 115.
    >You couldn't even tell who said what.
  116. 116.
    >Dusk walked over to a shelf. "I have a Riselem Ankh in here somewhere, we can just hook it up to a dish and be set to go!"
  117. 117.
    >He levitates the box out and dumps the contents on the floor.
  118. 118.
    >You imagine he immediately regrets it based on what falls out and the shade of crimson his cheeks take.
  119. 119.
    "Now I KNOW the maids at the castle don't have fishnets as part of their outfits..."
  120. 120.
    >"They will starting next week~..."
  121. 121.
     
  122. 122.
    >An hour or two later you were back at the palace.
  123. 123.
    >And your balls were back in their rightful spot.
  124. 124.
    >Celly had been disappointed when her own pair winked away, but at least it stopped her from giving you that lusty stare.
  125. 125.
    >The three of you had said your goodbyes and made way back to Canterlot.
  126. 126.
    >As part one of your revenge, you had let slip that it was Celly who flipped everyone, Luna was in the process of nagging your ears off about it.
  127. 127.
    >"-and I have NEVER seen such a blatant disregard for ones duties in all my years! Honestly Sister, swapping the genders of the ENTIRE NATION? OVER PETTY REVENGE?!"
  128. 128.
    >A glance at Celly's face told you that she was just as tired of this as you were.
  129. 129.
    >The two of you walked into your room as Luna ranted in the hallway.
  130. 130.
    >"Why, if this were the days of Olde Equestria, we would take you out an-"
  131. 131.
    >She gets cut off as you slam the door.
  132. 132.
     
  133. 133.
    >"THANK you..." Celestia said as she walked to her beauty desk.
  134. 134.
    >"Another minute of that and I'd have to send her to the moon again..."
  135. 135.
    "You deserve it."
  136. 136.
    >"Oh come now dear, I told you that it was unintended! I only wanted to give you the runs!"
  137. 137.
    "Oh well in THAT case..."
  138. 138.
    >Celly pouts at the desk. "Wasn't even willing to experiment with the time we had..."
  139. 139.
    "Oh fuck off, you're lucky I don't divorce you."
  140. 140.
    >"Ha! As if anyp0ny else would put up with you!"
  141. 141.
    >The room is silent for a moment.
  142. 142.
    "You know..."
  143. 143.
    >Celly turns to you.
  144. 144.
    "I'm not opposed to it..."experimentation"...
  145. 145.
    >Her gaze turns sultry as she gets to her feet and trots to the other side of the bed from you.
  146. 146.
    >"Oh~? What kind?..."
  147. 147.
    "Hehe...let me show you..."
  148. 148.
    >You reach under the bed and grab It.
  149. 149.
    >You plop it down on the bed and grab the rip cord as Celly's eyes grow wide and she realizes what it is you're holding.
  150. 150.
    >"Mous! Don't you-"
  151. 151.
    >You pull the chord.
  152. 152.
    "DILDO BOMB!"

BiE 1: Introductions

by Mandroid

BiE 2: Train, pains, and narcissism.

by Mandroid

BiE 3: Exposition and espionage.

by Mandroid

BiE 3.5: More trains, soon to be back pains.

by Mandroid

BiE 4: Home Improvement.

by Mandroid