Through the void to Anon


                                            This story is a follow-up to NTT anon's green (which is itself a spin-off of https://pastebin.com/QZMzLS7E).

                                            Anon's story:


                                            ----------------


                                            >From outside you can faintly hear the sound of birds chirping

                                            >Small beams of light flicker into your room through the window

                                            >You nuzzle you head into the warm body beside you

                                            >Anonymous

                                            >Your human, Anonymous

                                            >If anyone had told you a few months back that you'd be cuddling up to a space man you would have given them an earful on the improbability of other life existing in the universe

                                            >Sure technically you're still right because he came from another universe

                                            >Maybe the specifics aren't entirely accurate, he stopped your research when he told you he didn't want to go back

                                            >It's funny, his reason was that you hadn't been sleeping or eating

                                            >Even though his life was thrown into chaos that would make Discord do a double take, he still cared about your well-being first

                                            >The first of a long list of things you'd come to love about him

                                            >But you never even considered that he might have come from another plane of existence

                                            >Actually no that would mean he'd have come from heaven or hell

                                            >You're not sure which is more accurate for him

                                            >Maybe he came from another dimension?

                                            >No that would mean his body would be suited to operate within a 1 dimensional, 2 dimensional or maybe even 4 dimensional space

                                            >You begin to ponder about what kind of cultures creatures like that would have and the things you could learn from just observing that sort of space

                                            >Now you're just rambling in your head

                                            >He might have a point when he says you go too deep in thought

                                            >Not that you'll ever admit it

                                            >Celestia knows he'd never let you live it down

                                            >A wave of grogginess washes over you and you go back to nuzzling into his neck

                                            >He's definitely Equestria's best cuddler if nothing else

                                            >He's also a bit quieter than usual

                                            >A lot quieter actually

                                            >Normally after the sun rises he's cursed Celestia and her fat ass

                                            >His words not yours

                                            >Slowly lifting your head you begin to kiss up his neck and across his jawline softly

                                            >That always wakes him up


                                            >Not even a stir

                                            >Oh he thinks he's funny does he?

                                            >.....

                                            >If anypony hears about this you'll never live it down...

                                            >But then again, the likelihood of anypony believing him is pretty low

                                            >A smug grin tugs at the corners of your lips as you light up your horn and give a little attention to his "little buddy"

                                            >Again his words not yours

                                            >After a few seconds you still get no reaction from him

                                            >Now you're starting to panic

                                            >No, just breathe Twilight, maybe it's just sleep paralysis, he gets that sometimes right?

                                            >.....

                                            >Shit no he doesn't

                                            >You're now thoroughly jarred out of your peaceful rest and giving him a firm shake

                                            "Anon? Anon wake up!"

                                            >His body shakes limply

                                            >Still no response

                                            "Damn it Anon this isn't funny. Wake up already!"

                                            >Your voice cracks slightly as you shake him more vigorously

                                            >You give him a harsh shove and he ends up tumbling to the floor

                                            >Still no response

                                            >You bring a hoof to your mouth as you feel your breath hitch in your throat

                                            >Quickly jumping off the bed you turn him over and check his vitals

                                            >A PULSE

                                            >You feel your heart skip a beat with joy finding a steady pulse

                                            >But besides that nothing, he isn't responding to anything

                                            >Countless thoughts pass through your mind, each one worst than the last

                                            >Small voices whisper in the back of your mind everything that could be wrong

                                            >'Damn it you big idiot wake up'

                                            >You try mentally screaming at him as your voice fails you, paranoia clouding your mind

                                            "ANON!"

                                            >The voices in your head go silent as the very walls seem to shake

                                            >Was that... the Royal Canterlot Voice?

                                            >Damn it Twilight focus

                                            >With another flash of magic you grab Anon's body and teleport to Ponyville Central

                                            >Your hooves slam into solid ground and the familiar sterile smell filling your nostrils

                                            "I NEED A DOCTOR, NOW"

                                            >Several nurses rush over to you

                                            >You explain the situation to them as quickly as possible

                                            >Thankfully you get a doctor less than a minute later


                                            >You watch as they wheel Anon through to the A&E

                                            >You feel so helpless

                                            >What happened to him

                                            >He was so happy and full of life last night

                                            >Now this

                                            >With a flick of your horn you go about Ponyville, telling your friends about the situation

                                            >Little under twenty minutes later and you're all waiting for news on what's happened to him

                                            >The others try to calm you down but you can't help but pace back and forth

                                            >You have to keep yourself busy

                                            >It's certainly better than trying to collect your thoughts

                                            >Plus it's not like any of them are holding up much better

                                            >You see the sheen of tears threatening to break away from their eyes

                                            >Even Rainbow isn't able to keep her breathing steady

                                            >A few minutes later and Doctor Horse steps out

                                            >You immediately bolt over to him, causing him to jump back slightly

                                            "Is he alright doctor? What happened to him? Can you treat him?"

                                            >He holds up a hoof and you stop your bombardment

                                            >"We're not entirely sure how, but it seems Mr. Anonymous slipped into a coma during his rest, tell me was there anything blocking his airflow last night?"

                                            "No I- I don't think so"

                                            >"Any pressure against his cranium"

                                            "No nothing at all like that"

                                            >"Well then I don't know what to tell you, the closest thing I could relate it to is that it's like he's dreaming but his brain has somehow accepted that as reality"

                                            >"Well shoot is that even possible doc?"

                                            >You're slightly startle as you feel Applejack's hoof come to rest on your withers, giving you a reassuring squeeze

                                            >"I'm not sure, this is quite unprecedented"

                                            >"Well if he's dreaming then we just gotta call up Princess Luna get her in the big guy's head and pull him out, problem solved, and if that isn't enough she can take us with her and we can drag him out kicking and screaming if need be"

                                            "You're right, Spike take a letter"

                                            >With a salute your number one assistant pulls out a quill and some parchment and begins scratching away


                                            >Being sure to detail the situation as much as possible you double, triple, and quadruple check the letter before sending it off to the princess

                                            >A minute later and you get a reply

                                            >Hopefully if the doctor's assessment is correct Anonymous will be out by tomorrow

                                            >But still...

                                            >It hurts to see him like this

                                            >You tentatively place a hoof in his hand

                                            >It's cold to the touch and clammy too

                                            >But the worst part is that he doesn't respond

                                            >Not so much as a twitch

                                            >He used to tower over ponies, coming to eye level Celestia herself

                                            >He picked up a timber wolf and slammed it back down like it was a kids toy when it tried to hurt the CMC

                                            >But now, he seems so fragile and small, and you can't do anything about it

                                            >You hang your head and let the tears flow, sobs wracking your body

                                            "Anon, please don't leave me"

                                            >You're barley able to get your words out through the sobs

                                            >The day passes by and everyone soon retires back to their homes

                                            >But you stay put, even when the nurses have the unmitigated gall to try and remove you

                                            >You are jarred out of your sleep as the sun shines right in your eye

                                            >Slowly rising you try to pat down your disheveled mane

                                            >As the memories of yesterday come flooding back your head snaps to Anon

                                            >Sadly he's still laying there motionless

                                            >Celestia and Luna stand at the end of his bed

                                            >Quickly getting up you give a small bow before looking to them

                                            >They share a sad glance before turning back to you

                                            >"Twilight Sparkle, we are sad to inform you that the one known as Anonymous is not dreaming, we found no trace of his mind scape in our search, we tried all night to find any leads to it but came up with naught, we are sorry"


                                            >You feel your heart drop into the pit of your stomach

                                            >You turn your head up to Celestia, hoping beyond hope that she'd have some life threatening journey you could take to find a spell or an artifact or a pony or bucking anything to help here

                                            >All you get is a small shake of her head

                                            >You slump onto your haunches as the situation comes crashing down on you

                                            >You are embraced by your mentor as the tears once more come flooding to sting your eyes

                                            >Maybe he'd wake up tomorrow

                                            >He'll wake up tomorrow right?

                                            >Right?


                                            ----------------

                                            (My continuation starts here)

                                            ----------------


                                            >Your horn lights up and a familiar spell rips apart the fabric of reality.

                                            >With one swift motion of your head you make a sizable tear.

                                            >The feeling isn't something you ever use to, it's almost like a blade going through flesh.

                                            >In your frantic search you've gained knowledge even about this kind of feeling.

                                            >You are Twilight Sparkle and it's your hundredth jump. You counted.

                                            >To think that you'd have to completely abandon your home, your friends, your responsibilities, all in search for the one you love.

                                            >But you've abandoned those long before you started your journey.

                                            >A month has gone by since Anonymous fell into his coma-like state. There was no recovering him.

                                            >Ponies said you were like a ghost at his bed. From being near him constantly, to talking to him, gradually you barely left his side at all.

                                            >As you started to lose hope you started to lose your mind as well. You couldn't deal.

                                            >Your friends consolations were empty. Your mentor's plea to return to your life offended you.

                                            >This wasn't something you could just let go. Not only for your own sake.

                                            >You were a complete mess but you know he wasn't feeling better, wherever he was.

                                            >His mind is somewhere. There is some faint brain activity, he IS dreaming. Just not in this world. His dream is reality to him now so he can't wake up.

                                            >Desperate, you decided to pursue him.

                                            >Gathering magic energy from the remains of the portal to Equestria, you've created a spell that allowed you to travel through all realities, all dimensions.

                                            >There was no way to pinpoint where he is. So you just randomly searched for any traces of him.

                                            >There was a catch though. As the nature of his portal was, you can only go through it once. It closes right after.

                                            >The places you visit become inaccessible.

                                            >Naturally, it means you can't return to "your" Equestria that way anymore.

                                            >Your only hope is finding your Anon and waking him up.

                                            >Even if it takes something like destroying that reality altogether.


                                            >When you go through a portal, you end up in a strange plane.

                                            >It's an endless space of nothing. A complete void.

                                            >No sound, no heat, barely any light to see yourself.

                                            >You can just cut through it and you'll end up in your next place.

                                            >There was no predicting where, you quickly realised that this may take a long long time.

                                            >Yet for some reason you were never really tired. It's like in this void you don't lose any strength.

                                            >You barely eaten even in the hospital and here you almost forgotten about it at all.

                                            >You didn't have time. You have to find him as fast as you can.

                                            >Sometimes you landed in a world like Equestria, where ponies lived. Those were like alternate timelines, sometimes extremely twisted.

                                            >You still asked about Anon, to no avail.

                                            >Sometimes you landed in the worlds like he described, with humans living in there.

                                            >Knowing his history it was easy to pinpoint if it's his world or just some deviation of "reality".

                                            >But he could be anywhere. Maybe he's dreaming about his World Wars? Maybe he's living in the future. You can't know for sure.

                                            >That's the scariest part. How exactly are you going to locate him? People may not know him at all and he'd still be in that world, just in other places.

                                            >The idea of narrowly missing him drives you crazy. But there was no other way. You made sure you've searched as thoroughly as possible before moving on.

                                            >And another thing, with all these worlds, the word "reality" doesn't really apply anymore.

                                            >Veil after veil, you tear the drapes down, exposing the never-ending charade of strange places.

                                            >What is "reality" then? What is your home of not just another one of these?

                                            >It doesn't matter, none of it does. There is only one goal to this, and it's not curiosity.

                                            >You get so mad sometimes, feeling how helpless you are.

                                            >Sometimes you cry, but in the void your tears mean nothing. They disappear as soon as you enter it.

                                            >This is the only constant in your life now and it scares you.


                                            >Jump 128

                                            >A bleak and colorless winter.

                                            >Lots of blood on the streets.

                                            >People here speak strange languages, you don't think you can find him here.

                                            >The paper you found on the street has at least a year you can read: 1942.

                                            >Pointless, move on.

                                            >Jump 139

                                            >Equestria of the past. No noticeable deviations from the norm.

                                            >Canterlot is still under construction.

                                            >"Why do you have wings, dear? Are you a princess?"

                                            >Celestia looks a lot younger. And acts like a regular pony too.

                                            "You can say that."

                                            >"Ha, what does that supposed to mean? You know, you remind me of a pony I knew once."

                                            "Really?"

                                            >"Yeah, the royal mage. Her name was Twilight Sparkle. She made all kind of spells for me."

                                            "I'm honored to hear that, princess, but-"

                                            >"Just call me Celestia, dear."

                                            "I am looking for human."

                                            >"A what?"

                                            >You sigh. It would be so interesting to hear about you being this universe's Starswirl but you have to move on.

                                            >Saying your goodbyes you swiftly retreat to the void.

                                            >Jump 323

                                            >A small town of humans with a big fort near it.

                                            >People speak your language, aren't even curious about who you are.

                                            >No sign of Anon though. Shame, he would've loved it here.

                                            >A tall girl gives you a medallion.

                                            >She explains that it's a lucky charm of hers and you obviously need every bit of luck on your way.

                                            >You thank her and move on.

                                            >That was the first of the items you started carrying with you, but not the last.

                                            >It's been over 500 jumps now.

                                            >Some ponies and people get so invested in your story they don't even want to let you go.

                                            >But you have to. He is still out there.

                                            >These jumps are taking toll on you. You're becoming unnerved, desperate. Trying to get through worlds faster.

                                            >It's like a blur with only the void being your friend.

                                            >You think about Anon constantly and this saves you.

                                            >No matter how scared you are, the hope is still there. His embrace will make it all worth it.

                                            >There's no one to point out your obsession, and if you do it yourself you just scoff at it.


                                            >Jump 644.

                                            >Colossal monuments tower over a giant arena below you as you come out in the open.

                                            >A blend of Crystal Empire and pegasus architecture but you're not sure.

                                            >Royal guards encircle you and you recognize the ancient pony uniforms. Another time period, perhaps?

                                            >They are hesitant to apprehend you, looking around confused.

                                            >"Let her go."

                                            >The voice that issued the command sounds awfully familiar.

                                            >The guards move to the sides and you see before you Twilight Sparkle.

                                            >She is wearing that old armor you jokingly made for the Nightmare Night.

                                            >So is this really...

                                            >The mare before you is less than shocked to see you, more like glad.

                                            >Funny how both of you are absolutely unfazed by this occurrence.

                                            >"Twilight? Which world are you?"

                                            "I don't know? The normal one?"

                                            >"Oh my, looks like one that's not connected. Alright, what can I do for you?"

                                            "I am looking for a man named Anonymous"

                                            >The pony gasps. Looking around she motions you to follow her as you walk away from the guards.

                                            >"How did you know about him?"

                                            "Look, I have no idea who you are or what this unconnected world thing is, I'm just looking for someone important to me."

                                            >"I don't think I can help you. My own Anon... He died eight years ago."

                                            >A cold sensation washed over you. His death is not something you account for and being reminded that it's possible is rather chilling.

                                            >At least you're still able to feel something, right?

                                            >"I raised him as a brave warrior and a scholar but in the end even he too did not outlive me. Oh, cruel fate..."

                                            >Twilight's head hangs low so you give her a meek hug.

                                            >"I don't have a connection to the multiverse anymore so I can't give you any directions."

                                            "It's ok."

                                            >"Do not waste time, Twilight."

                                            "You don't have to tell me that."

                                            >You tear open a portal and, saying your goodbyes, jump into it.

                                            >What Twilight said makes you more determined than ever.

                                            >If Anon was going to die, you want it to be on the same day as you, after a long fulfilling life together.


                                            >Jump over a thousand.

                                            >Metal all around you. Long corridors filled with rubbish. Someone's speaking in the distance.

                                            >You walk and soon reach the voice. It's coming from a giant hall. Or rather an observation room, as you see stars above you.

                                            >The phantasmagorical vastness of colorful nebulae enchant you for a moment.

                                            >You wish you'd be here under different circumstances.

                                            >Before you stands a man adorned in a dark robe. He's muttering something but he's alone here.

                                            >"What brings you here?" he asks in a raspy voice not even turning to face you.

                                            >His gaze is fixated on the vast unknown before him. You can't blame him for admiring the view.

                                            "I am looking for a man named Anonymous."

                                            >He laughs softly.

                                            >"Why, I can't say I'm not him, since anyone can be called that. Me, you..."

                                            "He was named Anonymous, that's how he called himself."

                                            >"In the void we are all anonymous. We are all without meaning."

                                            "I...guess?"

                                            >"You traveled through it. You've been in isolation. Soon, the identity will mean nothing. Then, you may return and ask your question."

                                            >What a cold and distant person. But he also seem tragic.

                                            "What's your name?"

                                            >"What is yours?"

                                            "Twilight Sparkle."

                                            >"No... that name was left in the void when you first stepped through it. They called me a name before but it doesn't mean anything to me now."

                                            >Oh. He's THAT kind of guy.

                                            >You don't have time for this kind of discourse so you decide to jump again.

                                            "I'll be off, then."

                                            >"Once you reach him... Will he accept you?"

                                            "I'm sorry?"

                                            >"Ones like me and you aren't destined for the mundane. Those who step into the void, perish. Those who somehow survive, are changed forever."

                                            "I will keep that in mind."

                                            >Just get out of here, Twilight. He's nuts.

                                            >"We are reaching Cygnus soon, would you care for..."

                                            >You jump.

                                            >The void is emotionless but it also charges you.

                                            >The silence of it as you rest before jumping to another world soothes your ailing mind.


                                            >Jump ???

                                            >Ponyville.

                                            >Treebrary stands right where it used to.

                                            >Hearing voices inside, you knock on the door.

                                            >Voices quiet down and the door opens. It's Rainbow Dash.

                                            >You greet her. She goes pale like she's seeing a ghost.

                                            >She barely manages to pronounce your name and you hear murmurs behind her.

                                            >"TWILIGHT? TWILIGHT SPARKLE?"

                                            >Your friends are all there, shouting in delight as they drag you inside, piling on to hug you.

                                            "What's going on, girls?"

                                            >"W-what? What's going on?!" Rainbow's voice cracks as tears stream down her face.

                                            >"We thought we'll never see you again." chimes in Fluttershy.

                                            >"Oh quickly, get Starlight!"

                                            "Starlight?!"

                                            >Rainbow Dash flies off as fast as she can while others swiftly occupy the newly freed space next to you.

                                            "I'm going to need an explanation here."

                                            >Rarity answers you this time, in a shaky voice:

                                            >"Oh, Twilight, do you not remember anything? One second you're imbued with the Elements of Harmony and next thing we know, you...you just disappear!"

                                            >"With a horrible burn mark on the floor." adds Applejack, pointing down.

                                            >The burn resembles you cutiemark. Ugh.

                                            >"Twilight, um... Why do you have...wings?"

                                            >Fluttershy's question in turn answers yours. But then...

                                            "Never mind that, what about Starlight?"

                                            >"Oh, she was so heartbroken you were gone."

                                            >"Yeah, she took the loss of her childhood friend really hard."

                                            >"Today is exactly four years since...since we all lost you, Twilight."

                                            >That's all you had to know. Shame. A faint hope that you've returned home disappears swiftly.

                                            >Your old home.

                                            >Suddenly, in a bright flash, someone appears in front of you.

                                            >It's Starlight Glimmer, shiny and winged.

                                            >You're not nearly as surprised as you should be. Some pony had to be the princess of friendship after all, if not you.

                                            >The mare looks at you with hope and disbelief and then jumps into the cuddle pile.

                                            >You hear all about how much she missed you all these years but you can't focus on it anymore.

                                            "I'm looking for a man named Anonymous."


                                            >"Man?"

                                            >"Anonymous?"

                                            >You just sigh. You don't know what you're lamenting more right now, the fact that he's not here, in a different but still the same world he loved so much.

                                            >Or the fact that you have to obliterate these ponies' hopes and dreams. And you can't find anything inside of you to cry with them.

                                            >That too should make you cry. But the last tears you've had evaporated in the void between worlds hundreds of jumps ago.

                                            >Better to do it right now than later.

                                            "I'm sorry, girls. I'm afraid I'm not the Twilight you're looking for."

                                            >"What do you mean?"

                                            >Starlight looks so desperate, so scared that her dream come true is turning into a nightmare.

                                            "There are other worlds... I'm just a traveler looking for someone. I'm so sorry."

                                            >This is your life now, being sorry.

                                            >"N-no. It can't be. You're Twilight, aren't you? All this time I wished I could've just done something, prevent it in some way. To see you again."

                                            >"That goes for all of us."

                                            >Look at them, princess. You're a monster. Pinkie haven't even utter a single word yet, she's just bawling on the floor. Others aren't really better.

                                            >And Starlight looks like she's about to go into panic mode.

                                            >Imagine what your friends in your own world feel right now.

                                            >You feel sick and just want to get away, so you open the portal.

                                            >Your horn hurts.

                                            >Seeing your actions Starlight realises something is about to happen and casts a spell.

                                            >Not a second later you feel paralysed.

                                            >"No, wait! You can't go!" she screams and jumps up between you and the portal.

                                            >Others approach you as well, collective pleading voices resonating in your head.

                                            >For a second there you feel like you're enveloped in the void again and the voices crack your skull open.

                                            >You can't take it. You don't even realise how you shatter Starlight's spell.

                                            >Giving Starlight no time to react, you jump over the pony saying your last "sorry" and go into the portal.

                                            >The void accepts you.

                                            >As always, all the tears you shed are burnt off as soon as they form.


                                            >You're in a world that resembles something Anon was describing to you.

                                            >There are only ponies around, but you're hopeful.

                                            >For now though you have to unwind, so you find a place where you can eat something.

                                            >Or drink heavily after that last jump.

                                            >Ponies take your bits right away, at least the currency's the same.

                                            >It's probably just future, nothing to worry about.

                                            >You'd worry about a hit on the head you feel, but you were knocked out.

                                            --

                                            >Strapped to the table in a white room with a mirror in front of you.

                                            >"Uh, hello?"

                                            >The voice is coming from speakers hidden here somewhere.

                                            >"Pony Subject 5, do you know where you are?"

                                            "What?"

                                            >"Do you recognise my voice?"

                                            "I don't. And my name is Twilight Sparkle, not subject-whatever."

                                            >You hear worried whispers through the speakers.

                                            >"P-princess Twilight Sparkle?"

                                            "Yes, now let me go. What's going on here?"

                                            >"Impossible. Twilight Sparkle has been dead for over a thousand years."

                                            >No reaction. Can't even be surprised anymore.

                                            "Yeah, well, in your world maybe."

                                            >"Ponies saw the portal. You came from the void of isolation. Aren't you our Twilight, reborn?"

                                            "I'm afraid not, I'm from another world."

                                            >Silence lingers for too long. Another voice rings out:

                                            >"Pony Subject 5, isolation must've twisted your brain. There are no princesses anymore. We were hoping that one day-"

                                            "I am looking for a human named Anonymous." you interrupt.

                                            >"A human? The only one that was here in Equestria died with Twilight Sparkle."

                                            >Muffled voice joins in, you can barely hear the words:

                                            >"Boss, she just lost her mind in there, let's deal with it quickly."

                                            >Oh, come on. You don't have time for this.

                                            >With all your might you rip the shackles from the table. You're stronger than you thought you were, huh.

                                            >"Don't let her get away!"

                                            >Too slow, you've already opened a portal. It closes behind you.

                                            >Face to face with the void again. Maybe you are losing your mind. It's a possibility.

                                            >It doesn't matter. You must press on.


                                            >It's hopeless, all of it.

                                            >No matter how much you jump around, you can't find him.

                                            >Sometimes, you even forget what you're looking for, unable to ask the question.

                                            >This is bad. You are losing yourself to the void.

                                            >Ripping reality to shreds is easy. You are filled with power beyond anything a pony can dream of.

                                            >In any violent conflict you find yourself in, you overpower anyone standing in your way.

                                            >But you also don't feel safe anywhere, so you sleep floating in the void.

                                            >It's so entrancing you sometimes don't even want to leave.

                                            >Your magic became different, it's amplified. You feel yourself growing even though you still barely eat.

                                            >The simple fact that you aren't willing to face is that you're changing.

                                            >When you meet him, will he even recognise you?

                                            >No, it doesn't matter.

                                            >You jump again and again. Sometimes it's a world like his, but the date is different.

                                            >Sometimes it's Equestria again.

                                            >You've ran into yourself so many times you can't even see them as yourself anymore.

                                            >And other Twilights are afraid of you. Soon, other ponies begin to shy away from you too.

                                            >Strange, in reflections you look alright. Just a few scars here and there, elongated horn, dim eyes with nothing reflecting in them.

                                            >Nothing out of ordinary, really. It's only your mane that's bothering you, it's growing and sometimes it glows in the void, mirroring it's maddening swirls of nothingness crushing into nothingness.

                                            >Veil after veil you breach still, determined as ever.

                                            >Time lost all meaning. Space doesn't exist. Only your desire to reach...

                                            >Someone?

                                            >You stop in horror. You are amidst dead and cold structures with a tiny slit of night sky above.

                                            >Unfurling your enormous wings you effortlessly launch to meet it.

                                            >Just a labyrinth of these structures.

                                            >There is no one here, yet you've spent last few days here. Why? You don't even remember when was the last time you've seen any pony at all.

                                            >Not just this world. The last dozen of jumps were just as empty.


                                            >Or maybe the last hundred.

                                            >Or a thousand.

                                            >Are you running out of places to go? Are these all that's left?

                                            >What are you doing here? You are searching. For what?

                                            >For...someone?

                                            >Someone close to you. Someone dear to you.

                                            >He looks like...

                                            >Sharp pain stabs your head from the inside, so intense you can't even remain in the air.

                                            >Coming down from miles high you realize you aren't in control anymore.

                                            >You're going to crush and you can't regain balance.

                                            >With a massive thud that echoes around seemingly forever your body is squashed upon the coldness of this hopeless bedrock.

                                            >Every bone in your body feel broken. Blood is rushing from every orifice.

                                            >You want to scream but your body isn't yours.

                                            >No, it's not that. You ARE screaming. So loud you don't even notice it.

                                            >All you do is scream. A piercing, heart-stopping shriek that ends when your breath ends just to resume a moment later.

                                            >You became pain. It became you. The tears won't stop.

                                            >Gee, Twilight. You thought you were past crying. The void will make it all better.

                                            >Just gotta open the portal.

                                            >You aren't screaming anymore, everything around you is screaming.

                                            >Drowning you in sound of your own helplessness.

                                            >You failed. You failed him, you failed yourself, you failed everyone you've left, and now you're going to die. Here, alone.

                                            >You deserve it.

                                            >...

                                            >Focus, Twilight.

                                            >Open. The. Portal.

                                            >Mustering enough strength to move you head you cast the spell.

                                            >A wild stroke of magic tears reality asunder. Instead of the glowing horn ripping through space, a beam of pure white energy shoots forward and pierces the whole world.

                                            >A chasm underneath you, cracked sky above.

                                            >The structures around you are collapsing, and beyond them the stars are too.

                                            >The nebular drapes are merging.

                                            >You fall into the abyss you've created.

                                            >It is for the best, probably. The pain is ending. You are taken.


                                            >You wake up in the void, barely able to move.

                                            >The pain is gone, but so is your strength.

                                            >At least you're alive.

                                            >You remember clearly, you have to find Anonymous.

                                            >Why did you struggle with that before? It's clear as day.

                                            >You just gotta move. Something is preventing you from doing that.

                                            >Looking at your body you don't seem to understand what became of it.

                                            >It looks...liquid? Without form, but with some volume.

                                            >Don't even question it, Twilight. It's not why you're here.

                                            >Finally you found your determination back, nothing else is important. Try to move.

                                            >It's hard, but you somehow move your foreleg.

                                            >It's almost like you're stuck in some sort of wrap and can't get out.

                                            >After some struggle your liquid form breaks and your real hoof emerges.

                                            >It's good as new. Compared to broken, faded and dirty hoof you had this new look is shiny and perfect.

                                            >Like you're just out of the shower.

                                            >A hot shower with Anon, where he tells you all kind of stories while you let him take care of you.

                                            >He is gentle and his fingers are swift, caressing your body and massaging your head as he spreads shampoo all over your mane.

                                            >It smells like lilac and he tells you he likes the smell because he had lilac growing under his windows.

                                            >It reminds him of home.

                                            >Home...

                                            >...

                                            >You break through whatever it is that stops you from moving forward. The liquid form dissolves as you emerge from it.

                                            >And then you hear a horrifying scream.

                                            >You are on a bed. It's dark, but you wouldn't mistaken this room you've spent so much time in.

                                            >It's the hospital bed you're on. And right next to it, Twilight Sparkle is screaming in horror.

                                            >"Anon! What have you done with my Anon?!"

                                            >You shuffle around to get up but your body touches something cold and hard.

                                            >Investigating the rattling sound coming from under you, a realisation dawns on you.

                                            >It's a human skeleton.

                                            >Twilight next to you is crying and keeps asking you what have you done.

                                            >Your spine is ice and for a moment you can't move at all.


                                            >In panic and confusion you manage to stumble about and you end up stepping on the bones.

                                            >They crumble under your hooves.

                                            >No, it's not your fault. It's not him.

                                            >You have to get out of here.

                                            >Leaving the grieving mare alone, you jump off the bed and reach the door.

                                            >But you can't open it with magic. Touching your head in disbelief you find that you don't even have a horn.

                                            >"Where do you think you're going?"

                                            >The voice of a desperate, broken mare sends chills down your spine. Once again you are frozen in fear.

                                            >"Do you think you can escape? This is your responsibility."

                                            >Magic aura envelops your entire body and you are carried back to the horrible bed of bones.

                                            >"I wish you've never met him! I wish it would never came down to this!"

                                            >The screaming all around you is back, so is the headache.

                                            >Your body is slammed onto the bed with unreal force and for a second you feel like you're going to die.

                                            >Losing yourself for a moment you soon realize you're down on a hard rock ground.

                                            >There's blood all around you. Your bones are broken. You are silent.

                                            >Seems like you've never really left that place, huh?

                                            >There is nothing left of that shiny perfect form of yours. Your disgusting, disfigured self is dying right here in the middle of nowhere.

                                            >And yet you hear, in the distance, someone calling your name.

                                            >The voice sounds male.

                                            >...

                                            >It's him! He is here.

                                            >Why? Is this where he spent all this time, in some empty maze of nothingness?

                                            >You try to call for him but there is no control.

                                            >You feel your body but you can't move it. Not even the eyes to look around.

                                            >He has to find you. But you're afraid of it.

                                            >Time painfully passes as his voice draws closer.

                                            >Until you hear footsteps right around the corner.

                                            >"Twilight? Is that you?"

                                            >You haven't heard him for such a long time. And now he's here.

                                            >Even this torment can't dull the joy you feel. This moment is everything you've ever wished for.

                                            >Sound like he is running towards you.


                                            >"Twilight? Are you alright? Jesus fuck, what even happened here? Twilight? Can you hear me?"

                                            >Yes you can. But you can't let him know!

                                            >Oh no. This is the worst. Somehow you need to make him know you're alive.

                                            >Whispering all kind of curses he falls on his knees before you.

                                            >Reaching down he puts his finger on your neck. He wants to find a pulse.

                                            >Despair distorts his face as he apparently finds none. Which is just not possible. You are alive, you are right here.

                                            >Please, Anon, notice something.

                                            >"Twilight... No. Am I too late?"

                                            >He cradles your head as he brings you closer to himself.

                                            >Your broken neck snaps freely on his arm and he gasps in horror.

                                            >This of course is painful as ever, but you are unable to show your reaction.

                                            >Hands shaking, he strokes your mane and muzzle.

                                            >He shouldn't see you like this. Not like this.

                                            >It's unbearable to watch. Do SOMETHING, Twilight!

                                            >He is crying now, as he lays his head on your chest, hugging you.

                                            >Your mutilated body doesn't scare him off, he's drenched in your blood but he doesn't shy away from what's left of you.

                                            >He cries. He shouts. He damns the whole existence. He whispers vows of revenge upon whoever or whatever did this to you.

                                            >All of it is so painfully slow, and no matter how hard you try you can't escape this body like you did with the liquid one.

                                            >Eyes unable to blink, staring forward forever. You cry and no tears come out.

                                            >You call for him and no sound is heard.

                                            >Agony inside, nothing on the outside.

                                            >One word, one twitch, one breath would save him. But you can't grant even that.

                                            >No spells comes through no matter how you focus.

                                            >Twilight Sparkle is dead.

                                            >Now you're just angry. At yourself, at the world, at life. It's simply unfair.

                                            >The feeling escalates quickly and now all you feel is rage.

                                            >In an effort that would surely break the rest of your bones you try to at least move a hoof.

                                            >Imagining this revolting body giving in, little by little you feel like it's working.


                                            >The screams are returning. Among them, you can hear yourself.

                                            >Your hoof is freed, soon the rest of your body follows.

                                            >But when you blink and search for Anon you find nothing.

                                            >You're buried under something hard and cold, stacked chaotically on top of you.

                                            >Being able to move now you try to go up.

                                            >The stuff around you barely budges but you can't use magic for some reason, and so you move it with your legs.

                                            >After what feels like an hours of just squeezing between hard blocks of yet unknown nature you feel your surroundings getting softer.

                                            >You can even see light in the cracks up above.

                                            >Another hour of work and you emerge from your unwanted grave, tired and hurt.

                                            >Looking around you it becomes obvious what were you buried under.

                                            >And honestly, you were better off now knowing.

                                            >Countless human bodies. Some disfigured, some intact. Some rotten, some fresh.

                                            >It's a mountain next to a mountain, a desert of nothing but bodies.

                                            >They are all Anon.

                                            >And they suddenly twitch.

                                            >Together, in one motion they turn their heads to you. They are all looking at you now.

                                            >The inescapable stare is driving you crazy. No matter where you look a pair of eyes will meet you.

                                            >You get up and run, but the stares follow. You try to fly but you have no wings.

                                            >Your desperate cry echoes among the bodies as you stumble and fall on them.

                                            >Immediately you are grabbed by multiple hands and they push you down.

                                            >Too late you realise that they're trying to bury you again.

                                            >You scream and cry.

                                            >And you call for him.

                                            >The disgusting, cold and empty touch of these abominations is nothing compared to how Anon treated you.

                                            >Sure he could be rough with his hands sometimes, but he always touched you with care and respect.

                                            >You trusted him with everything. He wouldn't ever hurt you.

                                            >These hands are not him. He would NEVER do such a thing.

                                            >These corpses have nothing to do with him. The very thought of it is insulting.

                                            >You demand to be freed right away.


                                            >With a light thud you fall onto your butt on something cold and metal.

                                            >You are surprised to find yourself in the observation hall of stars again.

                                            >The figure before you isn't turning to face you still.

                                            >"Back so soon?"

                                            >The voice! It's Anonymous.

                                            >You run up to him and indeed, here he stands, smiling at you.

                                            "How is this possible?"

                                            >"How? How is all that you've done possible?"

                                            "I just don't know if it's really you."

                                            >He smirks.

                                            >"Are you really you?"

                                            >Wait a second. This is another trap, isn't it?

                                            "Listen, I'm not here to play games. Can you answer me for once? I'm completely lost. I'm tired, beaten and I just want all this to be over."

                                            >"Well, I like to tease. Remember that one book that supposedly went out of stock and you couldn't get it, only for me to give it to you because it was me who bought the last copy?"

                                            >Squinting, you give whoever it is standing before you an angry frown.

                                            "Maybe I do. Now tell me something I don't know about you."

                                            >"Oh no, you got me! What a clever pony. Maybe you should be Anon instead?"

                                            >You blink a few times in confusion and suddenly find yourself on eye level with him.

                                            >Standing on two legs like it's nothing, looking at your arms.

                                            >But this is more unnerving than amusing.

                                            >Seeing your reaction your host continues.

                                            >"Anyone can be one, I told you. Do you have a name still?"

                                            "Yes, I do. I'm Twilight Sparkle. What a stupid question."

                                            >"Well, seems like-"

                                            "I know what this is all about. It's so funny, isn't it?"

                                            >"Yes, and yet you're still talking to yourself despite knowing it."

                                            >You hesitate for a moment.

                                            >You are both ponies now, though you are without horn and wings and this thing is a younger version of you.

                                            >Or maybe it's you as you were before, you can't recognise your own body anymore.

                                            >"Can't you see you're falling for it even if you think you're in control?"

                                            "But I-"

                                            >"You can't say what's real anymore. When exactly do you think you've lost track of it?"

                                            "Does it matter?"


                                            >"Not really. You're trying to find someone whose life is as real as it gets. And yet he is dreaming."

                                            >Twilight walks closer to the windows, dragging her now comically oversized cape behind her.

                                            >"And you are jumping "real" worlds, to find his world that's not real. What do you think of that?"

                                            "Ugh. That reality is subjective? Spare me this discussion, I might barf."

                                            >"Well, guess what. You're not real now. You're dissolving in the void and you can't stop it. Is this what you want to hear?"

                                            "Yes. You know what, I'll just skip to the end of it. Anon once asked me if I'm real, if his life in Equestria is just a dream."

                                            >The pony looks back at you, unamused.

                                            "I never understood why he would ask such a thing. But now I think I do."

                                            "I didn't come this far to question my identity or my motivation. I don't care if I'm real or not. I only need to be real enough for him."

                                            >She just shakes her head and turns away.

                                            "Now if you'll excuse me, I want to wake up and continue my search."

                                            >"You can't wake up from something that's not a dream."

                                            "Is that a challenge?"

                                            >A white tear in space forms in front of you as soon as you swing your hornless head downwards.

                                            >"It was only a matter of time then. Get lost."

                                            >You jump.

                                            >Gasp. You wake up in the void. Back to square one.

                                            >You have no idea what was the last place you visited, the memory is hazy.

                                            >Looking over yourself you note you're in one piece still.

                                            >And that means you can move on.

                                            >At least in these visions you remembered what you're searching for. What's important.

                                            >Maybe if you focus enough, if you imagine it just right.

                                            >What IS Anonymous? Who is he to you?

                                            >Maybe the void will guide you if you just share your thoughts with it.

                                            >You just have to let it into yourself. Just a little.

                                            >Your thoughts will light it up and make a fine pattern you can follow.

                                            >Why didn't you think of this before? Silly Twilight.

                                            >Did you think it was dangerous or something? Big deal

                                            >If it brings you closer to Anon, what is there to lose?


                                            >It's spring again.

                                            >Even though you live on the third floor, you still notice the smell of lilac under your apartment building.

                                            >Just one thing to remind you of her.

                                            >It was a nice dream, while it lasted.

                                            >You actually don't regret it. For some time you were happier than anyone can even imagine.

                                            >Anonymous? Happy? That was too good to be true. And it wasn't.

                                            >All good things come to an end. And so you were here, alone.

                                            >You remember it clearly as ever. But it's been almost twenty years now.

                                            >You had to let go.

                                            >At first you were so desperate. Five times over the first year you pressed the gun to your head, spending hours like that, sweating in hesitation.

                                            >It was so silly but you hoped for her to appear.

                                            >One time something unbelievable happened, right? What if it happened again?

                                            >But a year passed. Then two, then ten.

                                            >And now you're in mid-forties, working a more or less paying job and just drifting through life.

                                            >As much as you're accustomed to this now it's still feels empty without her.

                                            >They say that it's better to love and lose. That time is the perfect healer. Why does it still hurt then?

                                            >You gave up on waiting, you had to accept it and move on. But you never gave up on her.

                                            >Spring is the season for you to remember the good old days. You close the window to not get in the mood more than you need to.

                                            >Returning to your room you feel like it's a bit colder than before.

                                            >There's also some strange smell. It smells like ozone.

                                            >At first you don't notice anything unusual. But then something sends shivers down your spine.

                                            >There's something in your bed under the covers. And it's twitching.

                                            >It's alive.

                                            >Rushing from one horrible thought to another you can't decide what to do.

                                            >So you just wait.

                                            >A low grumble comes out of it, and it's so animal-like, as if... Fuck, you can't even imagine what could it be and why it's here.

                                            >What's even more terrifying, is that your sheets are soaked in something pitch-black. Not blood.

                                            >More like oil.


                                            >It moves. It thrashes around. The blanket falls off, revealing a sight of nightmares.

                                            >It's a pony. In fact, it's an alicorn.

                                            >A form bigger than Luna, but a bit smaller than Celestia.

                                            >But it can't be compared in any other regard.

                                            >Scars cover her body and face. Even in the poor light of your room her coat looks discolored and grey.

                                            >The horn is a sight to behold, probably bigger than Celestia's, making the head look disproportional.

                                            >But that's not all. The snarling muzzle is leaking that black goo.

                                            >The eyes are completely dim, as if the light doesn't even reflect in them.

                                            >Her pupils look normal but the eyes are not moving. It's as if she's blind.

                                            >The wings suddenly unfold, showing their massive span, and the dark-blue mane sparkles with stars, flowing rhythmically.

                                            >And the cutiemark... You can't believe your eyes.

                                            >Whoever this mare is, she is nothing like Twilight.

                                            >The pony tries to get down your bed, but her legs are all wobbly.

                                            >You hesitate to do anything. But catching her gaze you see something so familiar.

                                            >She's in pain. She's pleading for help.

                                            >Despite everything the realisation dawns on you.

                                            >It is her. It's Twilight. She came back for you.

                                            >The mare's legs give in but you're quick to at least somewhat catch her, preventing the head from hitting the floor.

                                            >What horrifying things have happened to her? If it's still your Twilight, then what's all this?

                                            >Holding her head you can't ask any of these questions and she doesn't talk as well. Just grunt in pain, like an actual horse.

                                            >She shudders when you touch her, hooves ready to kick.

                                            >In her eyes you read everything you need to know.

                                            >Fear, doubt and turmoil. Like an abused animal feeling a touch that doesn't hurt it.

                                            >And she's so cold, barely even alive.

                                            >Just how long has this pony been like that?

                                            >It's you who spent twenty years in isolation, not her. Right?

                                            >But finally, after all this time, you can do something you've been missing so much.

                                            >Give her a nice, warm and strong hug.


                                            >For a second she becomes silent and stops all her movement in a stupor.

                                            >But then her whole body convulses and she begins to make terrifying noises.

                                            >Her head is on your shoulder and you feel the freezing goo rushing down your back.

                                            >But you don't care much. She's here, you're not about to reject her because of some strange body fluids.

                                            >This pony doesn't even resemble Twilight anymore. But it's her. And that means you accept her.

                                            >She starts coughing, and soon there's a black pool under you both.

                                            >As she coughs though, her voice is clearing and you hear her bawling. That only makes you hold her tighter.

                                            "It's alright, Twily. I'm here for you."

                                            >She cries louder, almost screaming.

                                            >Turning your head you see that she cries the same black liquid she vomited all over the place.

                                            >But her eyes are clearing. There's life in them now. Come to think of it, her coat is regaining color now too.

                                            >It's your Twilight, your little pony. Well, not so little anymore, but it's ok.

                                            >You can't even count how much time you've spent like that, holding the mare, comforting her.

                                            >Never for a second believing this is actually happening.

                                            >There are no words said. She just cried. And when no more tears came out she just sobbed on your lap while you stroked her gorgeous mane.

                                            >The black liquid seemed to be evaporating fairly quickly. You wonder if inhaling it is safe for you.

                                            >Twilight is calming down now and when she looks you in the eyes it's the most profound loving look you've ever received from her.

                                            >"Anon..."

                                            >Her voice is so weak, so feeble. But it's music to your ears.

                                            >You missed her so much. And now you feel like you're going to cry.

                                            >Seeing that, Twilight smiles.

                                            >Everything you've known in life is a lie. Only this matters.

                                            >You don't even try to stop the tears. It's the mare's turn to hold you.

                                            >God, even if this is just another dream you are thankful for it.

                                            >She holds you up her chest as you both now rest sitting at your bed.


                                            >"I can't believe I finally found you."

                                            "But how? I thought... I thought it was a dream."

                                            >Twilight's soft laugh turns into a cough once more but no liquid comes out of her mouth.

                                            >"It wasn't, silly. You're dreaming right now."

                                            "What?"

                                            >"It was pretty hard to find you, you know. I must say, this one made even me sweat."

                                            >Pride in her voice makes your heart flutter. Brag about it, princess.

                                            "You look like you've been through hell though, don't sell yourself short."

                                            >You give her a chuckle but there's no response. Looking up on her you see the princess staring nowhere.

                                            >It's not even a thousand yard stare, it's a thousand light years stare. Enough to make your skin crawl.

                                            "Twilight?"

                                            >She snaps out of it in a moment and smiles at you.

                                            >"I'm just a bit tired is all."

                                            "A bit? Have you been neglecting yourself again?"

                                            >You follow Twilight's gaze at the remains of the dark oil spilled from her.

                                            >"It's nothing. All part of the plan. You know me. Always complicating things, hehe."

                                            >Her weak attempts at a giggle end with more coughing. It doesn't stop and soon she literally vomits out more of that black stuff right on you.

                                            >Frightened, she shoots a look at you. Is she going to have to explain this to you? Are you going to be mad? Will you scold her?

                                            >No, not this time. You bring her head up and give her wet nose a soft kiss.

                                            "Maybe now that you're here you can rest?"

                                            >She's blushing. You are so glad to see that.

                                            >"No, not yet. There's still one more thing before that."

                                            "What's that?"

                                            >"You have to wake up."

                                            "Wait, when you said this was a dream, you meant it? How can this be? It's been twenty years."

                                            >Twilight ponders this for a moment.

                                            >"It's a long time, sure. But time is nothing. I'm sure you're still on your hospital bed like there's not even a minute passed."

                                            "Hospital bed?"

                                            >"Come."

                                            >The mare stands up, still wobbly.

                                            >"Twenty years, huh. It sure felt a lot longer."


                                            >She says that under her breath but you still hear her.

                                            "What are you going to do?"

                                            >"Take us back home"

                                            >Home? You mean you can go back to Equestria?

                                            >It's still hard to wrap your head around your life being a lie.

                                            >But it doesn't even matter. She is here, she is real, and you have to follow her.

                                            >You get up and stand near Twilight. She almost reaches your eye level. You can't complain though, it's not like you're getting younger too.

                                            >Her horn lights up and in a second this light blinds you.

                                            >The back of your head tingle. Then it starts to hurt. You yelp in sudden piercing pain.

                                            >"Don't worry, it's going to be fine."

                                            >Instead of light, it's pitch-black now. And you can't find her.

                                            "Uh, Twilight, I'm not feeling too good."

                                            >"Relax."

                                            >From the darkness princess covers you in her wings.

                                            >"I haven't spent so many years looking for you to just fail this one spell."

                                            >She moves closer and puts her head on your chest. You hug her, and even through growing pain you feel comforted.

                                            >She emanates tranquility. After years of zero rest and frantic movement she can finally allow herself to calm down. And it's the most peaceful presence.

                                            >"Do you trust me?"

                                            >The alicorn closes her eyes as you run fingers down her neck.

                                            "I do. Thank you for this."

                                            >You close your eyes as well and you feel like you're floating together with her.

                                            >Never before have you felt so close to your mare.

                                            >The pain goes away and your body feels like it loses form.

                                            >So light, so carefree. So young again.

                                            >All around you is cold viscous blackness, much like Twilight was coughing out.

                                            >But you're not afraid.

                                            >You're coming home with her.


                                            The End.