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Inspiration from Kinderquestria thread
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Anon:
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>Anon tries to introduce the concept of divorce for his own accidental horsemarriage
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>ponies being ponies misinterpret it and just use as an excuse to marry their spouses again, because the first time was so great, they could go for an encore
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Short Green-
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>Out of curiosity one day, you asked Twilight what the divorce rate was
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>She didn’t know what a divorce was
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>Nopony did
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>So you tried to explain it as when two ponies didn’t want to be married anymore
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>Twilight asked why you would want to do that
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>You said it was because people stopped loving each other
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>She just gave you a blank look and you walked away two minutes later as she processed the information
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>A few days later you got an invitation
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>To a divorce
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>Twilight asked the Cakes to get divorced for research purposes
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>The divorce was basically just a reverse wedding ceremony
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>First there was the reception
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>Pinkie was honored to be the first divorce planner in Equestria and the party was her usual fare of balloons, cake, and dancing
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>After that, everypony lined up to take photos with the soon to be divorced couple
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>Half the town was invited so you waited at least 40 minutes before you got a chance to take a photo
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>You kneeled for it so that your face would actually be in the shot
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>Next up on the schedule was a walk to the library
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>Twilight dressed up in some black robes and proceeded to use technical jargon to state that the Cake marriage was to be null and void
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>You’re pretty sure no one attending knew why she was talking about at all
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>After the “I don’ts”, Twilight officially pronounced them as Mare and Stallion
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>Everypony cheered
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>You just went along with it and congratulated the newly separated couple
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>They seemed about as happy as they normally are
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>Twilight went up to you
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>“Looks like the divorce was a success!”
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“Twi, you just separated a happily married couple”
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>”Well yeah, you told me that was the whole point of divorces”
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“The whole point is that they’re suppose to leave each other”
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>”How long is the field trip they take from one another? Because the Cakes are suppose to get married again soon”
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“Wait, how soon?”
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>You turned your attention back to the Cake family and you see the two of them stare into each other’s eyes and say those three magical words to one another
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>”I love you”
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>The cheers of the crowd grew even wilder as everypony congratulated them on their marriage
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>You turn your attention back to Twilight
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“It’s that easy to get married here?”
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>”If two ponies love each other, why would getting married be hard?”
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>The crowd went back to the reception area
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>There was more cake, more music, and more dancing
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>Rainbow Dash caught the thrown bridal bouquet
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>And then promptly ate it
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>You turned in for the night, with some thoughts that maybe Fluttershy’s repeated declarations of “I love you” weren’t so innocent after all
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>A few weeks later and your mailbox was getting filled with even increasing amount of divorce invites
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>Divorce-mania was sweeping the town and word was getting out into the wider nation
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>Married ponies everywhere were getting divorced so that they could be married again and throw wedding parties
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>Pinkie became the premier divorce planner
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>Rarity’s business was booming as so many orders for divorce and wedding dresses were coming in
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>Even the Apple Family was cutting a cut of the profits by creating a tradition of eating Apple pie for the divorce reception and eating cake for the wedding party right after
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>As you leaf through your mail, you think about all of these obligations to attend to
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>Filthy Rich, Big Mac, Cherry Fizzy, and Starry Eyes were just some of the ponies getting separated in the next three weeks
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>Twilight asked you to be her divorce date to her brother’s own separation next month
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>Oh, and the Cakes were going through their fourth divorce as well
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>You don’t even like weddings
by MisterAnon
by MisterAnon
by MisterAnon
by MisterAnon
by MisterAnon