Guess The Fetish


                                            Originally Published February 25th, 2018


                                            >Day Game Show in Equestria

                                            >Be Anon, star of Equestria's favorite live gameshow: "So You'd Like To Guess Anon's Fetish?"

                                            "With your host, Fluttershy!"

                                            >Flutters steps out from behind the stage, beaming as she does every time you introduce her to the audience.

                                            >When you ended up in Equestria, you weren't really sure what to expect

                                            >You know you didn't expect T.V. execs to find your being sexual harassed by a timid yellow horse to be "good for sweeps"

                                            >You also didn't expect the show to still be running after five years

                                            >Such is life

                                            >"S-so Anon, what will be tonight's challenge for the grand opportunity of guessing your fetish?"

                                            >Oh right, you host a gameshow

                                            >You want to keep reminiscing though, so you give out a challenge that requires little effort on your part.

                                            "I'm feeling like 'King of the Hill' tonight, Shy!"

                                            >Basically, the show works by contriving challenges for ponies to compete in, with the prize being a chance to guess your fetish, plus a million bits if you guess right

                                            >Not wanting to work with Fluttershy, you did everything you could to sabotage the show in the beginning:

                                            >The Eat The Hay Challenge

                                            >The Get Kicked in The Balls Challenge

                                            >The Insult Princess Celestia Challenge

                                            >You even had ponies recreate wholesale episodes of Jackass, but it just kept shooting ratings up, and you eventually put effort into making the show

                                            >Plus nobody had ever even come close to guessing your fetish anyway, and this was the first stable employment you'd had since coming here

                                            >Heh, stable. Ponies.

                                            >It even helped mend your relationship with Fluttershy, thanks to numerous HR meetings, and you now consider her one of your closest friends

                                            >"A-and we have a winner folks!"


                                            >You snap out of your daze, and follow Fluttershy's hoof to where it's pointing

                                            >Looking into the the Challenge Arena, you see a mountain of unconscious ponies

                                            >Hopefully they remembered to pass out the liability wavers this time

                                            >The liability wavers had to be implemented after somebody OD'd during the "Eat All The Fucking Coke" challenge

                                            >On top of the pile of knocked-out horses stands a young griffin, probably no more than 20 years old, and a thin build for her size

                                            >Powerful hind-legs though. If she were human, you'd be on her in an instant. Like damn.

                                            "Are you surrrrre you didn't cheat?", you say with a practiced smarmy grin.

                                            >The audience eats it up. You still don't know why they enjoy that, but hey

                                            >Ratings.

                                            "Anyway, come on up, and we can GUESS..."

                                            >"...THE..."

                                            >"...FETISH!!!!"

                                            >From the bottom of the stage rises a relatively plain looking chair

                                            "Now as we all know, this chair is able to detect my feelings towards what I'm hearing..."

                                            >You sit in the chair, and a hush falls over the crowd

                                            "...And if this chair lights up and you hear bells ringing, then that means you have successfully guessed my fetish, and win the prize of One Million Bits."

                                            >Fluttershy steps up beside you and the Griffin

                                            >"B-but before you guess, why not tell us a bit about yourself?"

                                            >Flutters hands the mic over to the griffin, who takes it

                                            >"I'm so glad to be on the show! My name is Gal; I've been watching since the very beginning, and I'm a huuuuge fa-"

                                            >DINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDING


                                            >Oh no

                                            >"G-geeze Anon, aren't you getting a little ahead of yourself?"

                                            >The crowd roars with laughter

                                            >You chuckle too, but your blood runs cold

                                            >Without even making an effort, she got your fetish to a T

                                            >Her voice

                                            >For some reason, her voice is a dead ringer for Eartha Kitt's, and her legs aren't helping you out either

                                            >More important than your fetish though, what's going to happen to you?

                                            >This show was built around your fetish being unguessable

                                            >You're a ratings juggernaut in the late-night category

                                            >You have to find a way to get her off the stage, now

                                            "WELL folks, I'm afraid that's all the time we have tonight!", you say as you stand up from the chair.

                                            >The griffin looks confused

                                            >Good, maybe she'll leave

                                            "But I haven't gotten a chance to gue-"

                                            >DINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDING

                                            >You kick the chair off to backstage

                                            >"S-she's right anon! P-plus we still have ten minutes left in our timeslot."

                                            >Fuck

                                            >You quickly come up with a reason to get her off

                                            >GET HER AWAY, NOT OFF

                                            "Uhhh, I think she cheated? Yes! I'm pretty sure she did."

                                            >The griffin looks furious now

                                            >Oh right, the griffins tend to be pretty prideful

                                            >Fuck

                                            >She knocks you down, pinning you to the floor

                                            >You can feel her thighs resting on the outside of your hips, warm and soft

                                            >bonerpleaseno.jpeg

                                            >Just as your dick accepts your plea for help, the griffin starts yelling at you

                                            >"I WOULD NEVER CHEAT! HOW DARE YOU SAY SUCH A HORRIBLE THI-"

                                            >DINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDING

                                            DINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII


                                            >The chair explodes from the energy overload, taking out the entire theater.

                                            >Except for you, Gal, and Fluttershy

                                            >The latter of which is shoveling wingfuls of dirt into her mouth and pressing her hooves hard against her throat

                                            >"W-what do you think Anon? Do I sound like Gal n-EUSGH"

                                            >She starts puking up dirt, and a little blood

                                            >Gal tries yelling at you again, but turns pale and covers her mouth before flying off instead

                                            >You go pick up Fluttershy, and head for the studio doctor to wait for hell.

                                            >Two days passed before the trial began

                                            >The lawyers were just barely able to you and YellowUnderDoctorsOrdersNotToUseHerVocalChordsForTwoMonths from pirson time, thanks to the liability wavers

                                            >But you had to give all your earnings for that season to the families of those who died, a tidy thirty-million bits

                                            >You were also barred from Canterlot Studios for the foreseeable future, and Gal wouldn't even look at you during the trial

                                            >Everybody in town speaks to you in a flat monotone since the final episode aired

                                            >All because of a kids movie from 2000

                                            >Fucking Emperor's New Groove