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Originally Published February 25th, 2018
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>Day Game Show in Equestria
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>Be Anon, star of Equestria's favorite live gameshow: "So You'd Like To Guess Anon's Fetish?"
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"With your host, Fluttershy!"
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>Flutters steps out from behind the stage, beaming as she does every time you introduce her to the audience.
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>When you ended up in Equestria, you weren't really sure what to expect
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>You know you didn't expect T.V. execs to find your being sexual harassed by a timid yellow horse to be "good for sweeps"
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>You also didn't expect the show to still be running after five years
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>Such is life
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>"S-so Anon, what will be tonight's challenge for the grand opportunity of guessing your fetish?"
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>Oh right, you host a gameshow
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>You want to keep reminiscing though, so you give out a challenge that requires little effort on your part.
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"I'm feeling like 'King of the Hill' tonight, Shy!"
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>Basically, the show works by contriving challenges for ponies to compete in, with the prize being a chance to guess your fetish, plus a million bits if you guess right
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>Not wanting to work with Fluttershy, you did everything you could to sabotage the show in the beginning:
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>The Eat The Hay Challenge
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>The Get Kicked in The Balls Challenge
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>The Insult Princess Celestia Challenge
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>You even had ponies recreate wholesale episodes of Jackass, but it just kept shooting ratings up, and you eventually put effort into making the show
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>Plus nobody had ever even come close to guessing your fetish anyway, and this was the first stable employment you'd had since coming here
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>Heh, stable. Ponies.
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>It even helped mend your relationship with Fluttershy, thanks to numerous HR meetings, and you now consider her one of your closest friends
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>"A-and we have a winner folks!"
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>You snap out of your daze, and follow Fluttershy's hoof to where it's pointing
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>Looking into the the Challenge Arena, you see a mountain of unconscious ponies
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>Hopefully they remembered to pass out the liability wavers this time
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>The liability wavers had to be implemented after somebody OD'd during the "Eat All The Fucking Coke" challenge
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>On top of the pile of knocked-out horses stands a young griffin, probably no more than 20 years old, and a thin build for her size
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>Powerful hind-legs though. If she were human, you'd be on her in an instant. Like damn.
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"Are you surrrrre you didn't cheat?", you say with a practiced smarmy grin.
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>The audience eats it up. You still don't know why they enjoy that, but hey
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>Ratings.
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"Anyway, come on up, and we can GUESS..."
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>"...THE..."
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>"...FETISH!!!!"
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>From the bottom of the stage rises a relatively plain looking chair
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"Now as we all know, this chair is able to detect my feelings towards what I'm hearing..."
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>You sit in the chair, and a hush falls over the crowd
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"...And if this chair lights up and you hear bells ringing, then that means you have successfully guessed my fetish, and win the prize of One Million Bits."
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>Fluttershy steps up beside you and the Griffin
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>"B-but before you guess, why not tell us a bit about yourself?"
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>Flutters hands the mic over to the griffin, who takes it
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>"I'm so glad to be on the show! My name is Gal; I've been watching since the very beginning, and I'm a huuuuge fa-"
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>DINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDING
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>Oh no
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>"G-geeze Anon, aren't you getting a little ahead of yourself?"
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>The crowd roars with laughter
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>You chuckle too, but your blood runs cold
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>Without even making an effort, she got your fetish to a T
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>Her voice
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>For some reason, her voice is a dead ringer for Eartha Kitt's, and her legs aren't helping you out either
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>More important than your fetish though, what's going to happen to you?
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>This show was built around your fetish being unguessable
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>You're a ratings juggernaut in the late-night category
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>You have to find a way to get her off the stage, now
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"WELL folks, I'm afraid that's all the time we have tonight!", you say as you stand up from the chair.
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>The griffin looks confused
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>Good, maybe she'll leave
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"But I haven't gotten a chance to gue-"
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>DINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDING
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>You kick the chair off to backstage
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>"S-she's right anon! P-plus we still have ten minutes left in our timeslot."
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>Fuck
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>You quickly come up with a reason to get her off
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>GET HER AWAY, NOT OFF
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"Uhhh, I think she cheated? Yes! I'm pretty sure she did."
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>The griffin looks furious now
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>Oh right, the griffins tend to be pretty prideful
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>Fuck
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>She knocks you down, pinning you to the floor
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>You can feel her thighs resting on the outside of your hips, warm and soft
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>bonerpleaseno.jpeg
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>Just as your dick accepts your plea for help, the griffin starts yelling at you
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>"I WOULD NEVER CHEAT! HOW DARE YOU SAY SUCH A HORRIBLE THI-"
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>DINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDING
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DINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
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>The chair explodes from the energy overload, taking out the entire theater.
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>Except for you, Gal, and Fluttershy
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>The latter of which is shoveling wingfuls of dirt into her mouth and pressing her hooves hard against her throat
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>"W-what do you think Anon? Do I sound like Gal n-EUSGH"
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>She starts puking up dirt, and a little blood
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>Gal tries yelling at you again, but turns pale and covers her mouth before flying off instead
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>You go pick up Fluttershy, and head for the studio doctor to wait for hell.
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>Two days passed before the trial began
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>The lawyers were just barely able to you and YellowUnderDoctorsOrdersNotToUseHerVocalChordsForTwoMonths from pirson time, thanks to the liability wavers
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>But you had to give all your earnings for that season to the families of those who died, a tidy thirty-million bits
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>You were also barred from Canterlot Studios for the foreseeable future, and Gal wouldn't even look at you during the trial
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>Everybody in town speaks to you in a flat monotone since the final episode aired
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>All because of a kids movie from 2000
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>Fucking Emperor's New Groove
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