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- >Be Normal Norman
- >After crazy days at school, the vacations finally put a stop to the suffering
- >Nobody is calling you racist, nobody is playing pranks on you
- >And you give Chloe your friend Scott to be at peace with no hipster bullshit
- >It's an only you day!
- >And what better way to spend the day than the new amusement park, Equestria Land!
- >You bought a full service ticket, so you can go to any attraction you want
- >Entering the amusement park filled you with that silly childhood nostalgia
- >The games, the laughs
- >And the high quantities of sugar in any food you eat
- >Cotton candy, popcorn, candy apples, cookies, sweets, lollipops
- >You run to the food area, and buy one of everything
- >Sitting in one bench, you go full madness on anything that lands on your mouth
- >If cavities and diabetes were the punishement for this glorious moment, it was well worth it
- >A while later, maybe you are having seconds thoughs
- >Sickness and dentist are easy to go by, but God, bellyache is cruel
- >"Corndogs! Churros! Hotdogs! Sodas!"
- >Well, another bite won't hurt
- "Hey man, one corndog please"
- >"That'll be $3.50"
- >You pay the good man, and eat the corndog
- >*Gruooooo!*
- "Oh man, that was a mistake..."
- >You run to the port-o-potties, but there's a long line
- "Oh man..."
- >You make a desperate run to the water ride
- >The log ride is full of wet people laughing like mad men
- >The ride is simple but effective: a few quick turns, a slow rise up, and one big fall
- >But you aren't here because of the game
- >You run all the way behind the attraction, and in one very well hidden area, you undo your pants and squat
- >Your ears were perking up, waiting for the ultimate sound: the splash made by the log falling
- >Time doesn't help, your stomach is burning and hurting more
- >When you though everyone was going to hear you crap, a loud splash shakes the place
- "AAAAAHHHHHHH!"
- >You scream as loud as you can so you can blend in with the other ones, and a loud fart followed by a big shit leaves your body
- >You enjoy the calming sensation of an empty belly after taking a big smelly shit for a few seconds, and clean up
- >Well, service is going to take a while before coming here
- >You are back at the entrance of the log ride, thinking what to do now
- >Well, you feel really chill after taking a shit in a place that was probably more clean that the portable bathrooms
- >Walking around, there's the games for kids, like a mini-zoo and a small rollercoaster
- >Flutters and Rainbow are there
- >You choose to walk back before they see you. You don't need magic crazy girl shit today, only fun
- >Walking around, the relaxing area is nothing special. But something was weird. AJ was there only sitting a bench
- >You keep walking, and you see Tim with that nerdy little boy getting a candy apple. Adam is working there
- >Now that you think about it, you have been seeing Tim a lot with that nerdy kid everytime he gets away from Nolan.
- >And that kid gave him that new jog sweater
- >"Tim, look! Let's go there!"
- >he points to that giant octopus carousel
- >"Ok, ok. We are going"
- >They go to that game
- >A walk later, you find the carnival games
- >you stop right there
- >Sunset and human purple are in front of the bottle game
- >"This game is rigged!"
- >sunset walks away while throwing a ring, and lands it on the bottle
- >"Yes! Come one, come all! Everyone's a winner!"
- >Well, it's not the only game there. There are a lot of other carnival games
- >After a bit of pondering, the mini-zoo it is
- >A small walk back, you enjoy yourself with the little farm animals
- >Funny, this place would look like yellow's place instead of the rollercoaster
- >Whatever, you saw her with Dash. She probably didn't had a choice
- >she wouldn't have a choice with you neither to deal with the equestrian bullshit, but I guess you are too nice so you wouldn't tell her no
- >Whatever, petting time
- >A small sheep comes to you
- "Aww"
- >A smaller cute sheep goes closer too
- "Awwwww"
- >You look at a cuter little lamb at the side
- "Awwwwwwwww!"
- >The big sheep comes to your sight
- "Get off you!"
- >You shove the sheep away, and look at the little lamb
- "Awww..."
- >A few pets later, you leave the zoo with an "I petted a lamb" pin
- >"Bah!"
- >A loud sheep scream comes behind you
- >The sheep you shoo away is there, looking angry at you
- >"Bah!"
- "Oh shit!"
- >The sheep starts to chase you, and you run away
- >All the park is watching a young adult boy being scared by a small sheep
- >You run to the food court, and throw anything to stop it
- >Bagels, apples, cotton candy
- >The sheep shrugged off most of the sweets, some sticking in his wool
- >You keep runing until you pass the park again
- >You see a hive of bees, and in a cartoony way, you throw it to the sheep
- >"BAAAAAAHHH!!!!"
- >The bees get stuck in the sweet wool and attack the sheep, and she keeps running until it falls in the park fountain
- >Animal control arrives, and take the sheep away
- >Whoo, oh man that was close
- >Well, you guess you can't check the zoo now. May as well go to other place
- >A speakerphone goes on
- >"Attention visitors. The rainbooms are going to sing in today's parade! Please be ready!"
- >You check your watch
- >You can go to five attraction games before the parade
- >After a crazy sheep chase, you need to unwind
- >You go to the carnival games area, and go to the shooting dart game
- Flim: Welcome to the darts game
- Flam: Just $10 bucks a play
- Flim: Rules are simple
- Flam: $1 for big ones, $3 for medium, and $5 for smaller ones
- Flim: You only have 5 shots
- Flam: Now don't go and make this a bust
- >They give you five darts
- >You aim, shake your hand a bit, and throw the darts
- >*pop!* *pop!* *pop!*
- >Well, that was a close one
- >you almost recover what you paid for
- >You missed one, two popped big ballons, and you threw two darts at the same time, but they only hitted one of the small ones
- >$9 back, you lost one
- Flim: Oh, shame, that was close
- Flam: But looks like you lost
- Flim: Give it a new shot next time
- Flam: We will be waiting
- >well, at least nobody was watching
- >Somehow you hear a post-ironic laugh at the bottom of the area
- >Well, you can still go to other 4 games
- >You go to the shooting game
- >Maybe if you can aim at something, you can hit it better
- >Anyway, there it is
- Flim: Welcome to the shooting range!
- Flam: Feeling brave bucko?
- Flim: Just for $5 dollars you get 3 shoots
- Flam: At least with an aim you can hit something
- >These guys can read minds? And weren't they at the darts game?
- >Now that you think about it, they were in the tossing rings game too
- >This is freaky
- "Yeah, whatever. Give me 3"
- >You pay the fee, and they give you a fake rifle with 3 corks
- Flam: Now no backing down
- Flim: Aim, shoot, and win a price
- >You read the rules next to the game
- >The closer targets are 3 points, the middle 5, and the far ones are 10
- >You can get a small prize with 9 to 12, a medium with 12 to 15, and a big one from 16 to 25. If you get 30, you get a special prize
- "Ok, just imagine you are playing dodgeball..."
- >you take aim, breath..... And shoot!
- >*ping!* *ping!* *ping!*
- >You hit three close targets
- Flim: Well, look at that!
- Flam: Not bad for a casual FPS gamer
- Flim: Get some training, and maybe you get a better prize
- Flam: Congratulations! Here you go
- >they give you a small pony plushie. Hooray
- >Alright, while you are carrying a small pony toy, you feel very macho
- >you go to the strenght test, and talk with the guy
- >Bulk biceps is there!
- "Bulk? I though you were working on that fruit punch stand at the mall"
- >"Yeah, well, I couldn't mix up so well, but the amusement park was hiring, so I got hitched here"
- >He gives you a hammer
- >"Want to try? $5 dollars for a hit. If you touch the bell, you get a prize"
- "Deal"
- >you pay up, and grab the hammer with your two hands
- "Here goes nothing..."
- >you grab the very heavy hammer with one hand with ease
- >You focus all your strenght in this hit. You feel this is the perfect one
- >You open your eyes, and run back to get some air
- >You jump to a pole, bounce, and hit the target
- >*PUM!*
- >the bell goes all the way up quickly, and breaks, flying away
- >*THHHIIIiiinnnnngggg.....*
- >Everybody are amazed by your strenght
- "Hey bulk, you need to caliber your game a bit better"
- >"H-how did you...."
- "By eating my greens and drinking lots of water during training. Now, my prize"
- >He gives you a small golden trophy: is a golden small dumbell on top of a pedestal. It reads "the strongest!"
- >you still have time for other 2 games
- >After showing off your macho strenght, you go to the tilt'n'whirl
- >The game stops, and you get strapped to go a few laps
- >The game starts, and the machine goes up and down as it spins
- >The speed increases, and you hold with all your strenght as the velocity is fighting your body
- >This is what astronauts probably feel
- >"Ugh..."
- "Hey dude, are you-"
- >"BLOOORRGGG!!!!"
- >The vomit hits you right at your face!
- "Ah, fuck man! You hurwl all over!"
- >"Ogg"
- >the man behind you couldn't last neither, and vomits behind your head
- "HHHEEEELLLLPPPP!!!"
- >Your head can't hold it anymore, and you throw up
- >Your vomit went to the center, where it broke into pieces, and everyone got hit
- >The wheel was turn into a vomit-a-ton
- >During the gross event, your zoo pin flies away to the center, clogging the game
- >You fly away comically into the supply area, and land on boxes
- >Your body got a few stickers and pins. You even recovered your "I petted a lamb" pin
- >Walking dizzy, you hit a water barrel, washing you up, but the gross feeling lingers on
- >You find another barrel, and let it out. You drop sitting right there
- >A time later, a guy founds you
- >"Hey hobo, go away. Only authorized personnel"
- >He takes you out of the area, and takes the barrel where you hurl
- >"Hey dude, where's this thing go?"
- >"In the candy apple supply. It's the caramel"
- >"Ok, got it"
- >You think you won't have any candy apple now
- >Well, at least you feel better
- >Only one attraction left
- >You go back to the carnival games, and find the coin pusher
- >Whoa! You came in a very good moment, it's really full
- >You go and put a coin
- >That coin was the last push. The resistance is trembling
- >The sweeper pushes, and a lot of coins fall
- >*Ting! Ting! Ting! Ting!*
- >You grab all the money it fell off: around $50 bucks. Nice!
- >*Tuuu* "Last call to the parade! Please come to the main street!"
- >Ok, it's time for the main show
- >In the crowd, you get ready to see the show
- >"Why, hello pleb"
- "Oh, hi Scott. How was your day with my cus?"
- >"Lethal. She may know about underground mangakas, but her sexual fetishes are bothering, even for the likes of me"
- "I see, I own you one. DOOM tomorrow? The original one"
- >"Acceptable. I choose the music"
- "Fine by me"
- >>"Onnichan!"
- "Hey Chloe, had fun today?"
- >"Yup! Scott is a very nice senpai"
- >Scott shudders a bit
- "Well, have fun you two. Oh! I almost forgot, don't eat the apples"
- >"why not?"
- "Because a guy-"
- >The lights turn up, and the music starts. The rainbooms are playing on the parade ride
- >Or whoever they are. They look like holograms.
- >They play a whack tune, and the girl in front is singing a shitty song off-key
- "Boo!"
- >"Boo!"
- >The crowd starts to jeer
- >You can barely hear, but see her taking her phone out
- >before she takes a picture from you and the crowd, the Rainbooms stop her
- >Wait, so is she evil?
- >The girl transform and the aryan beauty attacks the girl with a lightning whip
- >You don't know what is going on, but you cheer with the crowd
- >After that, the real Rainbooms play a cool song, and it was awesome
- Epilogue
- >Back at home, you put your prizes and money in order, and go to bed
- >Next day, you go and have breakfast
- >"Hey champ, enjoying your summer vacas?"
- "Sure thing dad. I went to the amusement park yesterday"
- >"That's my kid. Had a lot of fun?"
- "I earned money in the coin pusher and a trophy for being strong"
- >Your mother appears with pancakes
- >>"Alright. Good to see you had fun. Here"
- >Your dad turns on the radio while everyone enjoys pancakes
- R: ".... And the show starts tomorrow. In other news, the amusement park will close temporally. The park suffered a strange sickness. Reports say it was because something contaminated the syrup for the candy apples. We will cover more of this after these commercials"
- >"Son, do you know something about this?"
- "Nah"
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