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[FLUTTERRAPE] Fluttershy's Eggs

By Nebulus
Created: 2021-07-16 21:31:33
Updated: 2021-07-03 23:50:32
Expiry: Never
anonfluttershysafe/flutterrape/random

  1. Originally uploaded to Pastebin: November 17th, 2013
  2. ---
  3.  
  4. Just a short one. Don't cry.
  5. Shhh... Don't cry.
  6. STOP FUCKING CRYING.
  7. ---
  8.  
  9. >Day gestation in Equestria.
  10. >Drag yourself into the kitchen using your arms because you can't be bothered to walk.
  11. >See the cupboards high up and groan.
  12. >Stand up with great effort and moaning.
  13. "Aaahn~"
  14. >Woah.
  15. >Good thing no one heard that.
  16. >Crack your joints and pull open the cupboard.
  17. >A loaf of bread falls out and slaps you in the face.
  18. >This will do nicely.
  19. >Rip open the bag and pour vegetable oil on them.
  20. >Light a match.
  21. >Set the bread on fire.
  22. >...Vegetable oil can't set on fire.
  23. >Look at the can.
  24. >[ PETROLEUM ]
  25. >Shit, that explains the funny tasting salad you had yesterday.
  26. >And why you spent all of last night vomiting.
  27. >See that your bread is nicely toasted.
  28. >Throw it in the sink and turn on the water.
  29. >Once the fire is doused, pluck the soggy, oily mess out the scummy water and chow down.
  30. >Shit, you forgot the butter.
  31. >No wonder it tastes so vile.
  32. >Shrug and eat the rest of it anyway.
  33. >Dust your hands off and write your future self a note to clean up the mess when you come back home.
  34. >Future you is a fucking nerd.
  35. >He does everything you tell him.
  36. >Hear a knock on the front door.
  37. >Walk over and open it.
  38. >Fluttershy is stood there, looking pleased with herself. Like she just learned to like the smell of her own--
  39. >We're not going that far. I have some element of class, you know.
  40. >She reveals a massive box full of yellow and pink eggs.
  41. >"F-from me to you, Anonymous! I hope you like them..."
  42. "What are they?"
  43. >"...They're eggs"
  44. "Oh damn, they are!"
  45. >Fluttershy sighs and mutters something to herself.
  46. >"So umm. Yes! Enjoy them! I made them myself!"
  47. "Fluttershy are you implying that you gave birth to these eggs, and in this vast a quantity?"
  48. >"...Yes?"
  49. "I don't believe you."
  50. >Take the box from her.
  51. "But I'll eat them anyway just to shut you up."
  52. >"Oh Anon! Thank you!"
  53. "Why are you thanking me? I'm going to eat your children, presumably."
  54. >She blinks.
  55. >"GIVE ME BACK MY BABIE--"
  56. >Slam the door in her face and walk back into the kitchen, setting the box on the table.
  57. >You feel like they need more light set on them, as well as a more luxurious bed, so you open your fridge, pull out the entire haybail you keep stored there for this very reason, and pack the eggs into something more cozy, then get every lamp in your house and shine them into the box.
  58. "That's better. Now you'll be nice and warm for when I eat you in..."
  59. >Check your watch
  60. "Whenever the plot demands it."
  61. >Glance at your sexy calender.
  62. >A picture of Braeburn leaning seductively over a barrel winks back at you.
  63. >The caption beneath his voluptuous ass reads "Just do it~"
  64. >Well, the plot -did- demand it.
  65. >Reach into a drawer and pull out your meat tenderiser.
  66. >Pull back your arm and prepare to smash the first egg.
  67. >Still pulling it back.
  68. >Man, it's taking you a long time to smash this egg.
  69. >To your utter shock, the egg you had so quickly declared judgement upon cracks and moves.
  70. "Oh my god she wasn't kidding."
  71. >Watch in disgust and horror as a disgusting and horrifying hybrid of Fluttershy and a chicken emerges.
  72. >It looks like a griffin, actually.
  73. >They all have pink manes and yellow coats.
  74. >And chest fluffs.
  75. >Unf~
  76. >"Nya!"
  77. "D'aww--"
  78. >The chickenshy opens it's beak to reveal an arsenal of razor sharp barbed teeth and five forked tongues lashing around within.
  79. "FUCKING CHRIST."
  80. >Smash the little bastard's skull in with the tenderiser.
  81. >Panting, you look back at the calender while you wonder what to do.
  82. >"Just do it~"
  83. >Braeburn's ass is surprisingly insightful today.
  84. >Begin smashing as many eggs as you can.
  85. >You're too slow, however, as the eggs begin hatching, giving birth to a horde of disgusting and horrifying abominations.
  86. >Rather than risk fighting a swarm of nasty little fucks that vastly out number you, you get the hell out of the house.
  87. >Your kitchen window explodes outwards as the swarm exits dramatically and descends on Ponyville, hungry for the flesh of lesser beings.
  88. >Screams of the innocent fill your ears.
  89. >"They're so disgusting!"
  90. >"And horrifying!"
  91. "Fuck."
  92.  
  93. ---
  94.  
  95. Eheheh.
  96. AHAHAHAHA.

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