GREEN
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2395 13.91 KB 297
2395 13.91 KB 297
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Originally uploaded to Pastebin: November 8th, 2016
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Written in response to a picture an Anon posted of a drunken Fluttershy talking mad shit and trying to start fights.
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"Does this often happen?"
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>"YOU P-PANSIES WOULDN'T KNOW WHAT A... a... uh--YEAH EVEN IF IT HIT YOU IN THE FACE!"
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>Applejack finishes her drink and adds it to the pile of empty mugs beside her.
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>"Eyup. She'll have a small sip of water laced with lemon or somethin' then it's off to the races. Usually she'll start a fight with a stallion six times her size, hit him once, then start crying."
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>She yawns and stretches, several joints cracking.
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>"Happens every Saturday."
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>"YOU WANNA GO YOU... YOU NINCOMPOOP?!"
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>You watch in silent awe as the tiny yellow mare struts up to a stallion so large he's struggling to get through the door.
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>He grunts in distress as his huge shoulders get crammed in the wooden door-frame, preventing him from getting any further.
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>The bartender nearby throws his towel to one side in frustration, leaning over the counter to yell at the gargantuan white pegasus.
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>"Gad dammit Bulk, ya know you can't use doorways, ya freak!"
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>Bulk hangs his head in shame, muttering a 'Yeah' that sounds more like a kitten's mewl.
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>Fluttershy, undeterred by the hulk before her, struts on up and starts berating him.
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>"YOU LOOK LIKE A SNOWPONY I MADE WHEN I WAS A FILLY!"
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"Ouch."
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>Applejack grunts in response as she accepts another beer from the bartender.
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>"Yeah, her insults can get pretty intense. She called someone a ninny once."
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>The farmer shakes her head.
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>"Grizzly night, that one; lotta hurt feelings and therapy."
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>Fluttershy pulls back a hoof, taking her time to build up what meagre strength she has.
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>AJ raises an eyebrow.
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>"Oh, here we go."
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>As foretold, Fluttershy punches Bulk.
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>With a loud 'pop', the wall of muscle suddenly bursts free from his wooden prison.
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>He blinks a few times, then smiles at Fluttershy.
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>"Thanks, miss! Now I can pretend I'm normal again!"
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>The stallion prances off further into the bar.
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>Fluttershy watches him go.
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>Then starts crying.
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>"H-heee, auwaaaaghhhh!"
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>Another in a series of strange, garbled wails erupts from Fluttershy.
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>You pat her on the back, consoling her, though what for you're not sure.
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>Applejack is too jaded to care, and keeps drinking.
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>"Y'know, this is it now."
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"What's that mean?"
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>"This is it. This is your evenin'. Fluttershy's a lightweight, she's gonna keep sobbin' for the next few hours, so if you wanna bail I'll look after her."
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>You frown.
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"That's not really fair on you, AJ."
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>She shrugs.
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>"I'm used to it. Every Saturday, remember?"
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"Yeah but..."
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>You glance at Fluttershy, who's using her mane to wipe her tears away.
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"...Hey, AJ."
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>"Mm?"
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"How about I take her home?"
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>Applejack cocks her head.
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>"Take her home? Ya'll sure about that?"
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"Sure. It'll give you some peace, instead of looking after her for another evening."
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>Applejack stares at you.
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>Then slowly smiles.
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>"That's real kinda you, Anon."
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>She grins.
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>"Good luck."
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"Relax, this is for you, not her."
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>She shrugs, still smiling.
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>"If you say so."
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"God damn you're like a beanbag."
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>Fluttershy doesn't want to cooperate.
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>You half-carry, half-drag her along the moonlit, dusty back-roads towards her house.
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>She cries the entire time, sometimes having moments of lucidity to comment on a nearby owl or bat that glides by.
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>Then goes right back to sobbing.
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>Eventually you manage to grip her in a way where she can't escape.
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>With one hand firmly under her rump and another holding her back, she rests against your chest, her head under your chin.
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>Blubbering.
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"Nearly there, Shy."
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>"Bwuh."
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"Mm."
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>You shiver from the cold of the night, the mare in your arms like a dead-weight.
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>A part of you regrets doing this.
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>What would Applejack be getting up to now, you wonder.
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"Applejack you've had enough."
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>Applejack burps, then regards the hundred-something mass of drained mugs beside her with a bored expression.
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>"Nah."
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>You reach Fluttershy's cottage at last.
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>Fumbling for a moment, you crouch down, still clutching Fluttershy, and dig the key from under her welcome mat.
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>A quick fiddle with the lock results in the door swinging open.
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"There we are, home sweet home."
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>Fluttershy sniffs.
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>"Th-thank you..."
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"So you do this every Saturday, huh?"
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>"No. This is the first time someone's taken me home."
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>She gives you a drunken, coy smile.
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>You ignore it and carry her inside.
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>Ascending the stairs, you nudge her bedroom door open with a foot, proceeding inside and approaching the side of her immaculately-made bed.
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"You fine if I drop you here?"
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>"Mhm, just--"
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>You drop her.
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>She bounces once and sails off the other side of the bed.
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>A loud crunch signals her hitting the hardwood floor.
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>...
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>You stare in shock for a second, trying to process how that happened.
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>Then the loud, drawn-out wailing begins again.
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"I'm sorry Shy, I'm so sorry, I said I'm sorry!"
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>You sit on the bed, Fluttershy tucked up under the covers with an ice-pack on her head.
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>She's currently calling you every name under the sun.
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>Like 'meanie'.
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>And 'meanie' again.
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>You tend to the shockingly large bruise on her forehead.
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>The headache she's gonna have when she wakes up tomorrow will be legendary.
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>Tentatively dabbing the bruise with a wet cloth, the mare winces.
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>"It hurts..."
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"Yeah, no kidding, it looks like you got hit with a fucking shovel."
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>Fluttershy winces as you touch her again.
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>"You did this."
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"I get it, no need to keep harping on about it."
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>She glares at you.
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>"All I wanted was a nice night out with my friends and you had to go and ruin it..."
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"I'm still struggling to comprehend how or why only you and Applejack going to the bar on weekends is 'a nice night out', but alright."
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>"We normally have fun! But you just had to tag along and ruin it..."
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"You were starting fights, Fluttershy."
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>"They're not fights. They're aggressive misunderstandings."
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>Rolling your eyes, you pull your hand away from her face, the cloth gripped in your fingers.
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>A huge black bruise is now present on Fluttershy's forehead.
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>It looks terrible.
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>Fluttershy probably knows that too by the way you're sucking air through your teeth and making the most dramatic face possible.
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>"You'd better make this up to me, mister. I'm very upset with you!"
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"Alright, shit, sorry, -again-."
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>She scowls.
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>Then develops a small, cheeky grin.
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>"K-kiss it better."
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"Oh come on."
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>"Kiss it better!"
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"What are you, five? Just sleep on it, I'll get you another drink if you'd like."
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>"Do it or I'll tell everyone you threw me on the floor after taking advantage of me whilst drunk."
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"They won't buy that, I'm gay."
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>"No you're not, you have playmare under your bed. Seven monthly editions and the swimsuit special."
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"Fuck, well that--"
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>You do a double-take and give her a strange look.
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>She smiles innocently.
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"...Well that's just peachy."
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>"Come on, Anon, pleease?"
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"I don't like you when you're drunk. Or concussed. Whichever this is."
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>"Likely both. There's two of you right now."
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"Jesus."
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>"Now pucker up, mister."
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>Give out an exasperated sigh and lean forwards.
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>Plant a firm, loveless kiss on her forehead and pull back, an annoyed expression on your face.
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>"Mm, that was okay."
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"Oh, sorry, would you like more tongue, your highness?"
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>Fluttershy stares at you.
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>Then gives you a toothy smile.
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>"O-oh, oh my, that was, um, r-really lovely~."
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>You wipe your mouth.
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>It tastes like lemons and horse drool now.
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>Fluttershy giggles and nestles deeper into her pillows, pulling the covers up slightly.
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>Her face is adorned with a deep blush.
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>"So, what now?"
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"Hell do you mean 'what now'. Now I go to sleep on your sofa and leave early tomorrow, this isn't going any further, Fluttershy."
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>"Aww, come on, what about fooling around a bit? I'm drunk, you're drunk--"
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"I'm sober. You might have brain damage."
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>"--And there's no one that can disturb us..."
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>She bats her eyelids and chews her bottom lip.
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>"Aaaanooon~"
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"What."
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>"I'm feeling really naughty..."
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>You rub your eyes and squint at her alarm clock.
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>11:02
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>Applejack must be having the time of her life right now.
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>"Waddya mean 'all out'?"
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"You've literally drained every keg we have. Go home, Applejack."
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>"Nah."
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>"Come ooon, I never got to do this stuff as a filly..."
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"You've never messed around with someone whilst drunk?"
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>She shakes her head.
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>"That was always Rainbow Dash. I didn't, um, go to parties."
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"Really? That's totally shocking and not at all expected of you."
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>She frowns.
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>"I might not be an animal at parties..."
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>"...But I -am- an animal in bed."
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>...
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"Fluttershy you literally stole that from the rom-com we saw at the movies the other week. It wasn't a good line then, and it's not a good line now."
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>"Horseapples."
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"Just go to sleep, alright? I'm gonna be downstairs."
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>You stand up and head for the door.
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>Fluttershy whines desperately behind you.
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>"I-I'll tell everyone you raped me!"
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>As soon as she says it, she squeaks.
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>You slowly turn to face her again, your face a picture of shock.
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>She's pulled the covers over her face, her eyes peering out over the top at you.
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>Even she can't believe what she just said, but going off your stunned reaction she knows it worked.
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>Gingerly, she pulls the covers down, a nervous smile on her lips.
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>"I'll, um, tell everyone you raped me."
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>The next few moments are a stare-down between you and a mildly concussed possibly virginal pegasus.
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>...
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"Bullshit you will, go to sleep."
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>Slam the door.
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>Hear a muffled "Ponyfeathers!" from the other side.
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>You trudge downstairs and lie on her sofa, your legs dangling off the end.
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>All you wanted was to do something nice for Applejack.
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>She owes you big time for this.
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>As you stare at the ceiling, you hear the bed upstairs squeak.
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>Then the sound of hooves crossing the floor.
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>Followed by a door creaking open.
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>Hooves on the stairs.
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>And a small voice calling out into the dark.
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>"Anon? Are you asleep yet?"
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"No."
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>"O-oh. Sorry."
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>...
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>...
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"I'm still not asleep, Fluttershy."
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>"Sorry."
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"Go back to bed."
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>"Right, sorry."
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>...
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"I know you're still there."
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>"Please can we try kissing again?"
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"Shit like this is why you're single. Also take a breath-mint before kissing someone next time, your mouth tastes gross."
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>"O-oh, um, sorry."
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>Rapid hoofsteps up the stairs herald her departure.
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>Shortly after the voice calls out again.
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>"Sho cam we try kishing agun?"
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"Are you chewing gum?"
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>"...Mo."
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"Yes you are, I can smell it from here, Jesus did you eat an entire packet?"
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>"...Yeff."
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"I'm only sleeping down here to make sure you don't do anything dumb, Fluttershy. If you're gonna act like a dork then I'm going home."
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>"P-please don't go."
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"Then go to sleep."
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>"...Sleep with you?"
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"Sleep alone."
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>"Sleep alone with you?"
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"I'm never going out drinking with you again, I swear to god."
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>"Right, right, sorry."
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>Hoofsteps running upstairs signal her leaving again.
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>You fold your arms against your chest and push yourself into the cushions some more, trying to get comfortable.
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>Eventually, you find yourself drifting off to a pleasant sleep...
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>...Your eyes snap open.
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>Fluttershy is leaning over you, her eyes wide with shock.
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>Her mouth is hanging open.
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>You can still see a bit of gum in there.
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>Looking down, you see that she's stretched awkwardly over your body, trying not to touch you.
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>She gulps nervously, eyes darting from side to side.
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>"This is. A dream?"
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"Dreams don't smell like peppermint."
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>You glare at Fluttershy.
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"Mind explaining what you're doing?"
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>"Oh, well, I asked you if you'd changed your mind about the whole kissing thing? Then you didn't respond so I asked again and when you still didn't answer I took that as a yes so..."
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>She gulps, swallowing her gum.
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>Then wets her lips with a hasty tongue movement.
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>"...Wanna try kissing again?"
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>For a brief, terrible moment, you consider doing just that.
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>Giving her what she wants so that she'll leave you alone.
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>But you feel like doing that at this point would be encouraging this to happen.
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>If you keep giving her what she wants, she'll start pestering you for more.
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>Might even start chasing you around or knocking on your door when you're trying to eat breakfast in a morning.
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>You shudder at the thought of such a woeful horror.
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>Fluttershy takes your silent contemplation as an excuse to mash her mouth against yours.
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>Peppermint.
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>Lots of peppermint. And horse spit.
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>Fluttershy's inexperienced mouth attempts to tango with yours.
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>Yours stays completely rigid, refusing to move or open for anything.
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>Eventually she gives up doing that, sucks on your top lip for a while, then licks your face.
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>Just a huge lick. Right from the chin to the space between your eyes.
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>She pulls back, panting, and giddy.
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>"H-how was that? Pretty good, right?"
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>You stare at her, your face going sticky from pony slobber.
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"That was absolutely horrendous. Never do it again, nor tell our friends that you did it."
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>Sit up abruptly, grabbing the mare as you do so.
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>Place her on the floor and nudge her away with your leg, then rise to your feet.
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>She stands awkwardly pawing at the carpet with a hoof as you check yourself over in the darkness.
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>The mare tries to speak a few times, but gives up.
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>You walk to the door and open it, the moonlight flooding in.
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>A final look at Fluttershy, and she watches in return.
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>The tiny yellow mare avoids direct eye contact, and still says nothing.
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>With that, you step out and close the door behind you, leaving Fluttershy on her own.
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>You tried to do something nice, and this is how it turned out.
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>Well, at least one thing is for certain.
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>Thank god it's over.
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>...
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>Knock knock knock.
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>You lumber to the door, scratching your stubble.
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>Never usually get visitors this early in the morning.
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>Pull open the door and look down.
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>"H-hi. So um, the other night was really weird and I'm sorry, but I was just um, wondering if maybe you wanted to try kissing some more?"
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>You stare at Fluttershy in bewilderment.
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>"I-I brought peppermint if that's a turn-on?"
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The End.
by Nebulus
by Nebulus
by Nebulus
by Nebulus