[FLUTTERRAPE] Damage Control


                                            Originally uploaded to Pastebin: November 20th, 2020

                                            ---


                                            An Anon posted:

                                            "Fluttershy tears Ponyville apart when she can’t find Anon for her guess, because he went on vacation."


                                            ---


                                            >"I wouldn't say it's -that- bad, just that the whole city doesn't really have the same feel as Manehatten. I'm not much of a fashionista, Rarity, so I can't really give an educated opinion."

                                            "Mmm, I appreciate that, Twilight, I do, but I still wanted your opinion. So that's a no on Las Pegasus?"

                                            >"Just seems like an odd place to open a new store. It's far afield and the competition is fierce, isn't it? I'm just worried you'd be travelling a lot, and even -I've- seen some of the stuff coming out of there lately. Kinda seems..."

                                            "Avant garde?"

                                            >"I'd have said 'weird and creepy', and your work isn't that. Your work is... classy! Proud, dignified!"

                                            >You smile at your friend.

                                            "Dignified. Well, that certainly settles it then; Las Pegasus can be struck off the list."

                                            >"Are you sure? You seemed pretty intent--"

                                            "I'm certain, Twilight. I suppose I wouldn't want my brand to become tarnished by the, ah, 'oddities', let's say, coming out of the Strip."

                                            >Twilight pauses nibbling her slice of cake and gives you a coy smile.

                                            >"I thought you'd have been more understanding of oddities after all our adventures together."

                                            "But of course! However, oddities in the real world don't necessarily translate well into fashion, darling."

                                            >"I'll take your word for it. Do you think Anon will bring back anything for us? I was kinda hoping for a souvenir, but it felt rude to ask him for one."

                                            >You raise your teacup to your lips and sip, nodding pensively and thinking about your mutual friend as you watch the world go by from your seat inside the cafe.

                                            "Yes, it would be nice for..."

                                            >Your mind wanders for a moment, and after a few seconds of silence you turn back to Twilight and frown at her.

                                            "How... long, exactly, is Anonymous away for?"

                                            >"He said a week. Why?"

                                            >You attempt to keep your expression neutral.

                                            "And did you, or anyone else, explain this to Fluttershy before he left?"

                                            >Twilight holds your stare, chewing her bottom lip.

                                            >"I thought you did."

                                            "Ah. No, I didn't."

                                            >"Maybe Anon did?"

                                            "Dearest, why in Equestria would he ever tell her anything?"

                                            >"Good point."

                                            "So she doesn't know."

                                            >"Probably not? Maybe she's figured it out?"

                                            "And I'm sure that once she discovers that her 'beloved' has absconded from Ponyville, she will be perfectly reasonable about the whole thing."

                                            >"Yes. I'm, uh, sure she..."

                                            >Twilight trails off, and the two of you stare at one-another for a little while longer.

                                            >Then you both make a wild, frenzied scramble for the exit.


                                            >"Any sign of her?"

                                            "Not in here!" you shout, "What about the shed?"

                                            >"Nope, it's locked anyway!"

                                            "It's always locked!"

                                            >"Yes, but I can't see anything through the windows! Should I break in?"

                                            "You're not breaking into her shed, Twilight!"

                                            >You trot briskly out of Fluttershy's front door.

                                            >The door was unlocked, so you didn't feel too guilty about entering, and Angel didn't seem bothered anyway as he lay in a catatonic state on the sofa surrounded by half-eaten carrots.

                                            >Twilight emerges from the back garden, shaking her head.

                                            >"No sign of her."

                                            "She may well already be at Anonymous' house."

                                            >"Maybe. What time is it?"

                                            >You crane your neck to look back into Fluttershy's cottage at a clock on the wall.

                                            "Almost ten."

                                            >"That's usually when she goes looking for him, come on."

                                            >You both take off down the garden path.

                                            "I'm sure she'll be fine."

                                            >"Of course! Just need to explain that Anon will be gone for a little while."

                                            "Only gone to Las Pegasus for a week."

                                            >"He'll be coming back."

                                            "No reason to worry."

                                            >"None at all."

                                            >You crest a hill and look out onto a row of houses.

                                            >Anonymous' abode is the one on the end.

                                            >You can tell because of the dishevelled garden.

                                            >And because the door is wide open.

                                            >You and Twilight share a nervous look, and canter down the path to see what the damage is.


                                            >"Where are you?!"

                                            >A loud smash greets you as you step over the threshold.

                                            >More crashes sound from the kitchen.

                                            >Twilight bumps into the back of you, and cringes at the already-wrecked hallway leading to the kitchen.

                                            >You take the initiative and trot further in.

                                            "Fluttershy! Darling, we know where Anonymous is, please calm down!"

                                            >The mad rustling stops, and Fluttershy's head pokes out from behind the door frame.

                                            >"You know where he is...?"

                                            >She looks to be in a terrible state; mane a mess, bloodshot eyes, a strange twitch in one of them.

                                            >The mare gives you a shaky smile.

                                            >"H-how wonderful! Please could you tell me? Now? Please?"

                                            >You look around at the kitchen, taking note of the empty cutlery drawers.

                                            "Fluttershy I really doubt he'd have been in the drawers."

                                            >"You never know! Those humans are a crafty bunch."

                                            "We only know one human."

                                            >"I know."

                                            >She sighs.

                                            >"Isn't he dreamy?"

                                            "Ahh, yes, and also not small enough to hide in a drawer-- anyway, what we need to tell you is that Anonymous has taken a little vacation to Las Pegasus. There's nothing to get worked up over, and he'll be back in a week."

                                            >You smile at your friend, Twilight by your side smiling also.

                                            >The two of you regard Fluttershy as she processes what you've said.

                                            >"...So he's not in Ponyville."

                                            >"Nope!" Twilight chirps, "he's far away. No reason to wreck his house! Again!"

                                            "Really, Fluttershy, you don't have the money to keep paying for these damages."

                                            >"What was it, a hundred bits last time?" Twilight ventures.

                                            "Might have been two."

                                            >"Two hundred bits! Come on, Fluttershy, let's just go to the spa and unwind. If anything, this'll be a nice week to relax, take a load off, and not worry about Anon for a while."

                                            >...

                                            >"Doesn't that sound like fun?"

                                            >Fluttershy fixes Twilight with a worrisome look.

                                            >"A vacation. Yes, that's... that's exactly the sort of thing you would say."

                                            >Twilight glances at you, then back to Fluttershy.

                                            >"...Fluttershy? Are you alright?"

                                            >The pegasus narrows her eyes.

                                            >"I'm not sure, Twilight; would you be alright if your friends STOLE your soulmate and hid him from you?"

                                            "Oh bugger, not again."

                                            >"Fluttershy I'm not--"

                                            >"I KNEW you couldn't be trusted! Always spending time with Anon, MY Anon, instead of letting him be with me! And now he -mysteriously- vanishes on the day of our anniversary?!"

                                            "Anniversary." you flatly state.

                                            >"Well I'm not buying it! He's hidden somewhere in Ponyville, isn't he? Is he at the library?! I bet he is! That's where you hide everything! I know it's where you hide your weird sex books!"

                                            >Twilight narrows her eyes and lights up her horn.

                                            >"If I need to restrain you--"

                                            >Before she can do so, Fluttershy bashes said horn dead-on the tip with a wooden cutting board before shunting the unicorn to the side and galloping out the door, screaming "I'M COMING, ANON!" as she goes.

                                            >You sigh as you watch her retreat, then help up your friend, who tentatively pokes her horn with a hoof before wincing.

                                            >"Guess I'm not reading several books at once for a while," she grumbles, giving it another poke and wincing again, "Or teleporting."

                                            "Don't fidget with it dear, let it rest."

                                            >"A part of me wonders if we should have taken the doctor's offer for therapy. Might have nipped this in the bud."

                                            "Twilight, you and I both know that Doctor Loveboat wasn't to be trusted."

                                            >"He did molest a -lot- of ponies. So now what?"

                                            "I suppose we try and restrain her the old fashioned way and hope she causes as little damage as possible."

                                            >"I just hope Spike is alright."

                                            "I'm sure he'll be fine."

                                            >...

                                            "What was that about 'weird sex books', by the way--"

                                            >"Only Celestia can judge me, Rarity."


                                            >You find Spike lying face down in the mud outside Twilight's library.

                                            >Gently extract him from the goop via levitation, taking care not to get any on you.

                                            "We don't suppose you've seen Fluttershy, Spike?"

                                            >He gives you a deadpan look and jerks a thumb over his shoulder at the library.

                                            >"She bucked me out of the top floor window. Said something about treachery and sex books."

                                            >Twilight snorts far too loudly.

                                            >"Haha what a funny joke. So is she still in there? Has she reached my bedroom?"

                                            >"Nah, couldn't find whatever she was looking for so she left. Is it related to Anon?"

                                            "It would seem that way, yes."

                                            >"It's -always- about him with Fluttershy..."

                                            "She's very much in love with him, dear. One day you'll understand."

                                            >He twists himself around as he floats to look at the broken front door of the library, beholding the toppled bookshelves and mess all over the floor that he'll have to clean up.

                                            >"If that's what love looks like then count me out."

                                            "And deny Ponyville your charms? You'll break the hearts of every mare in town, Spike."

                                            >You give him a peck on the forehead and put him on the floor.

                                            >He tries to cover a smile and gestures towards the centre of town.

                                            >"She's probably gone to bother Pinkie. Maybe try there next?"

                                            "We'll do just that; thank you!"

                                            >As you trot away towards Sugarcube Corner, Twilight leans down next to her aide.

                                            >"Did she find...?"

                                            >"The box under your bed is safe."

                                            >"Okay good."

                                            >"Weird smell coming from it though."

                                            >"Nevermind that, just make sure it's locked and hidden."

                                            >"So are you going to help me clean up the--"

                                            >"Sorry, I gotta help stop Fluttershy!" Twilight shouts over her shoulder as she gallops away.

                                            >Spike glares after her and waddles back inside, grumbling vengefully.


                                            >The two of you enter Sugarcube Corner to find that everything is in order.

                                            >No signs of Fluttershy or a correlating struggle.

                                            >Mrs Cake is manning the counter, so you approach with a smile.

                                            "Good morning! We're looking for Fluttershy?"

                                            >"Oh, I'm sure I saw her flying past the shop earlier, seemed quite upset, is it about Anon?"

                                            "As always."

                                            >"Dear me. Send her my love when you find her, won't you?"

                                            "I can, but I doubt she'll listen."

                                            >"Never does when she gets going, that one."

                                            "Quite. Is Pinkie Pie around?"

                                            >"She's out running an errand at the moment, should be back in a few minutes; why, do you need her?"

                                            "Do let her know that Fluttershy needs restraining again. She'll understand."

                                            >"Oh! Alright then. Take care, dear!"


                                            >As you step outside the shop, Twilight puffs out her cheeks.

                                            >"Well that was a bust. Now what?"

                                            "Perhaps Sweet Apple Acres?"

                                            >Twilight frowns.

                                            >"I don't think doing a full circuit around Ponyville and meeting all our friends and seeing how they react to today's wacky hijinks is necessary. She'll be looking for places relating to Anon, surely?"

                                            "That's rational; where do you think she'll go?"

                                            >"Hm."

                                            >She thinks for a moment.

                                            >"What about Ponyville Lake? He likes going there on occasion."

                                            "Ah, but Fluttershy believes we're hiding him, so by that logic surely he'd be stolen away somewhere--"

                                            >"Your shop."

                                            "...My shop."

                                            >"Oh crap."

                                            "MY DRESSES!"


                                            >As you thunder around the corner of the street, fuelled by aristocratic fury, you see Carousel Boutique just in time to see a pink tail disappear inside a broken window.

                                            >Twilight staggers to your side, wheezing.

                                            >"I'm not... guh-- as in-shape as you, Rarity...!"

                                            "Not now, Twilight, this is a matter of life and death!"

                                            >You surge towards the shop, leaving Twilight panting next to you.

                                            >"They're, hah, just... dresses!"

                                            >She drags herself forward.

                                            >"I really need to stop teleporting everywhere..."

                                            >You shoulder-barge open your front door to find Fluttershy in the process of hurling bits and pieces of your Fall Fiesta collection all over the shop and screaming for Anon.

                                            >As the centrepiece of the whole range slides across the floor, accumulating dirt and cat-hair, you let out a shriek.

                                            "Fluttershy, you animal!"

                                            >Hurling yourself at your friend, you both begin rolling around on the floor, yelling.

                                            >"You took him from me!"

                                            "He took himself from you!"

                                            >"How do I know you're not already married?!"

                                            "What the blazes are you talking ab--"

                                            >Fluttershy grabs your belly and screams at it.

                                            >"Are you getting pregnant?!" she pushes her face against your tummy fat, "Tell me where your father is!"

                                            >You both continue to wrestle for dominance until Twilight enters the shop and collapses next to you as you writhe.

                                            >She reaches with a hoof, lightly slapping Fluttershy on the hind leg before completely giving up from exhaustion.

                                            >Sweetie Belle, alerted by the noise, appears at the top of the stairs.

                                            >"Rarity? Are you playing with a stallion again? Do I need to stay in my room for a few more hours?"

                                            "Sweetie! The Fall Collection! HELP!"

                                            >Thrilled to be of use, Sweetie Belle canters downstairs and throws herself into the melee between you and Fluttershy.

                                            >She doesn't do much, just sort of gets rolled around between the two of you, but she's having a blast and is generally just happy to be involved.

                                            >"Next time you and a guest do this, can I join in?"

                                            >You grunt in response and punch Fluttershy in the jaw.

                                            >She responds by biting your neck.

                                            >You moan involuntarily, but manage to get a few more swings in.

                                            >Beaten and bruised, Fluttershy recoils back, disengaging from you.

                                            >You lie panting on your back, Sweetie Belle draped across your belly and giggling mirthfully.

                                            >As she steps away, Fluttershy topples backwards over the prone body of Twilight, who is still gasping for breath from her earlier exertion.

                                            >For a moment you stare at the ceiling of your boutique, neck sore from Fluttershy's bite and body soft and spongy from all the blows you received.

                                            >You look sideways at your Fall Collection.

                                            >It seems to be mostly intact.

                                            >A bittersweet victory at most.

                                            >Groaning, you sit up, pushing Sweetie Belle off you, the filly declaring victory and prancing off to the kitchen to eat junk food as a reward.

                                            >You blink a few times, surprised to see Fluttershy apparently gagged and hog-tied in bright pink ribbon, completely incapacitated.

                                            >Pinkie Pie sits on the pedestal in the centre of the showroom, swinging her legs.

                                            >She beams at you as you look between her and her handiwork.

                                            >"Hiya, Rarity!"

                                            "Pinkie Pie...? When did you--"

                                            >"Oh I was here the whole time. I was just waiting for you to tire Fluttershy out. Great job, by the way!"

                                            >You narrow your eyes, but before you can speak, Twilight pushes herself off the floor.

                                            >"Okay, okay, I'm good, alright Fluttershy, let's go!"

                                            >She socks the helpless Fluttershy square in the face.

                                            >The mare whines in protest.

                                            "Twilight, please."

                                            >Your friend, only now realising the pegasus' position, deflates.

                                            >"Oh; well, at least she's secure."

                                            "Very much so. Oh, Mrs Cake sends her love, by the way, Fluttershy."

                                            >"Fanf fyoo", mumbles Fluttershy over the gag.

                                            >"What now? Drag her back to the cottage?"

                                            "Once we've rested, dear."

                                            >"Good." Twilight nods and sits on Fluttershy, who whines again.

                                            >Pinkie, now clearly bored, gets up and goes to join Sweetie Belle raiding the cupboards.

                                            >You flop against the pedestal, rear legs splayed before you and front hooves at your side.

                                            "We can't keep doing this."

                                            >Twilight shakes her head.

                                            "It's every other week."

                                            >"Yup."

                                            "Fluttershy, darling, can you -please- promise us this won't happen again? The property damage alone is bad enough, but if you go after my dresses again I'll probably end up in jail."

                                            >Twilight clicks her tongue.

                                            >"I could probably just, you know, whip up a spell to make Anon fall in love with her, then she won't feel the need to break any more stuff."

                                            "Twilight that is a -deeply- unethical misuse of magic."

                                            >"You -did- just nearly lose a collection you've been working on for five months."

                                            >...

                                            "So do you think you can get it working before Anon gets back?"

                                            >"Give me two days."

                                            "Marvellous."


                                            The End.