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Ain't Life Beautiful

By PoppedAnon
Created: 2023-09-05 18:22:54
Expiry: Never
anonapplejackrainbow dash/aie/pregnancy

  1. >Day rotten apples
  2. >You are Applejack
  3. >And today you work on your orchard
  4. >Or you would if you weren't so sick
  5. >Not much to do anyway
  6. >Especially since you gave a plot of land to those bats
  7. >Disgusting varmits
  8. >Bucking season is still months away and cider season ended a couple months ago
  9. >Hay of a way to end it though
  10. >Just glad Dash and Anon kept it under their hats
  11. >Don't need it getting out that you're a fillyfooler and some kind of apefucker to boot
  12. >Even if it was the best rut of your life
  13. >Mac is walking you to the hospital to get something for this nausea
  14. >Ain't a fan of hospitals
  15. >Takes too long to tell you it was nothing, but Granny was no help
  16. >Took one look at me then started cheering how its about time someone bucked the bats outta my orchard
  17. >Weird since the little monsters are in our orchard now
  18. *urk*
  19. >Mac looks over and cocks an eyebrow obviously worried
  20. >Big galoot
  21. Sorry Macintosh thinking about those durn bats again, I'll be fine 'till we get there.
  22. Just have that bucket ready
  23. >"Eeyuh", he replies still clenching the bucket handle in his teeth
  24. >Willing to bet my bottom bit he wishes he was a unicorn right now.
  25. >Luckily we make it to the hospital without me spillin my guts
  26. >Had to swallow a lot of bile to get here though
  27. >After some time in the waiting room Nurse Redheart came in to give me a few tests
  28. >Temperature, blood pressure, blood sample and all then she heads off
  29. >A good twenty minutes after Dr. Stable walks in, giving Mac a curt nod then smiling at me.
  30. So Doc, I assume you got some good news. Just some stomach bug, take two and call ya in the mornin or somethin?
  31. >"Much better news than that Applejack!", he says happier than anypony addressing an ill pony should be.
  32. Don't tell me its all in mah head Doc, the wastebin at home would say otherwise.
  33. >"Ugh Eeyup", Mac agrees. Still sour about having to clean up after me.
  34. >"Miss Applejack, you're pregnant! Congratulati-
  35. I didn't hear anything after that, fainted hard enough to do Rarity proud.
  36.  
  37. >Day cool but could be cooler
  38. >You are Rainbow Dash
  39. >Also know as The Dash, Fastest flier in the world, Equestria Games medalist, Hero of Equestria
  40. *Hurk*
  41. >And one really sick pony
  42. >Today is the day
  43. >You've worked your entire life for this day
  44. >Every day of training, every drop of sweat, every second of flight has led to this day
  45. *Bleugh*
  46. >There is no way some lame germ will cheat you out of your dream
  47. >Your destiny
  48. >After a bit of coughing and spitting it seems it has passed
  49. >Or you've just ran out of food to vomit
  50. >"Um...Rainbow, are you feeling better?" Fluttershy asked outside the stall
  51. Yeah Flutters I think it is over. Nothing I can't handle.
  52. >"Well you should drink some water, to rehydrate yourself."
  53. Good idea, I'm going to be doing my most intense routine. Gotta be better than my best today!
  54. >"M-maybe you should reschedule when you're feelin-
  55. NO WAY! Did you see who was out there Fluttershy? Spitfire, Fleetfoot, Soarin, Princess Celestia, and Princess Luna!
  56. Hay, this is Princess Luna's very first judging of the Wonderbolts flight exams, she wasn't around when they were formed.
  57. Not to mention the rest of the girls
  58. >"But you said you have to be better than your best, a-and you can't be your best if you're sick Rainbow Dash", Fluttershy replied a bit more conviction in her voice than usual
  59. >"Plus Applejack has been sick too, she couldn't even make it today, and she knows how much this means to you. Maybe you caught what she had!"
  60. >You haven't hung out AJ that much, any less than anypony else anyway
  61. >Not since Pinkie's Super Cider Season Cessation Celebration
  62. >Now that was an AWESOME night
  63. >Anon made the studs from Rarity's stories look like geldings
  64. >But that was nearly three months ago, so what got AJ couldn't have got you
  65. >Gotta have some "drinks" with him after this
  66. Maybe you are right Fluttershy, but I can't just ask the Princesses and hundreds of ponies to come back another time because I got a stomach ache.
  67. Besides, 90% of Rainbow Dash is still better than the competition!
  68. I'm going to blow them away, then once I get well my first show will be that much better!
  69. >"I hope you're right Rainbow Dash, I'll be cheering you on from the stands."
  70. >You get out the stall, wash your hooves, and chug a bit of water from the sink
  71. >Splash a bit of water on your face to refresh yourself, and look at that awesome mare in the mirror
  72. >You walk out of the mare's room next to Fluttershy head held high, and promptly fall into her side when a wave of nausea hits.
  73. Heh, sorry Flutters.
  74. >"Rainbow, please...
  75. Sorry, Fluttershy, but there are 200 ponies in those stands who were promised The Dash, and I'm here to deliver!
  76. >You take your place at the Coliseum arena the crowd cheers and you take it all in.
  77. >A quick glance to the stands and I see the Princesses in their seats of honor, with the girls under them
  78. >Each in smaller thrones representing their elements with one empty seat where AJ would be
  79. >They're split down the middle with Pinkie and Rarity cheering and applauding, and Fluttershy and Twilight looking a bit worried
  80. >No doubt Fluttershy told her about how you've been sick
  81. >"Reservist Rainbow Dash, are you ready?"
  82. >You snap back to attention to Spitfire, giving her a crisp salute
  83. Ma'am, yes ma'am!
  84. >"Your routine will be judged on speed, originality, and style," she says pacing in front of you.
  85. >"You will start off with 10 points with each mistake deducting one point minimum."
  86. >"Mistakes include, unstable flight, dropping below the cloud layer, and any injury to self or others. Do you understand?"
  87. Ma'am, yes ma'am
  88. >"You need five points to stay in the Wonderbolts program, seven to stay a reservist, and a full ten and approval from both princesses in order to be accepted. Do you understand?"
  89. Ma'am, yes ma'am
  90. >"Good, you may begin when I have cleared the field," she says as she flies past you. "Don't worry Dash, you got this," she whispers as she passes your ear.
  91. >She's right you got this
  92. >As soon as she clears the arena you shoot straight up an ascending Sonic Rainboom to start off strong.
  93. >Anything with wings know how much more power you have to put into ascending than descending.
  94. >Speed, check
  95. >Next you go into a wide corkscrew grabbing any cloud you can pulling them into your quickly forming whirlwind
  96. >Your speed making the tornado look like a colorful top
  97. Style, check
  98. >You fight back another hit of nausea focusing on this last trick
  99. >Every cloud packed tight in the eye of the storm darkening as they condense further
  100. >A couple well placed hits charges them up for the last bit.
  101. >A long loop from the bottom of the tornado to the top and directly in the center you buck the stormhead hard as you pass through it.
  102. >Landing on the cloud layer on the bottom of the arena, wings flared and head high a massive lightining bolt hits
  103. >The bolt itself comes out as colorful as you are and dispels the tornado, arcing between the stormhead and the cloud you are standing on
  104. >A perfect representation of your cutie mark hangs in the sky for a full two seconds
  105. >Five seconds of silence fills the arena before the crown erupts in cheers and applause
  106. >None louder than Fluttershy
  107. >Originality, check
  108. >After the crowd dies down the Princesses and Spitfire approach
  109. >"Well done, reservist Rainbow Dash perfect score," Spitfire announces steady face threatening to break out into a grin.
  110. >"COMMENDABLE PERFORMANCE, FRIEND RAINBOW DASH! EXCELLENT USE OF YOUR COLOR SCHEME AND TRAIL. I GRANT YOU MY APPROVAL TO ENTER THE WONDERBOLTS," Princess Luna announced in full Canterlot voice.
  111. >She looked more like a fan than royalty with a Bolts hat and t-shirt beneath her vestments
  112. >Then the worst thing that could happen did happen
  113. *HURK*
  114. >And just like that you vomited pure water and stomach acid in the middle of the Cloudsdale Coliseum in front of the Princesses, Captain Spitfire, your best friends, and about 200 other ponies.
  115. >"Goodness. Rainbow Dash are you all right? Was that routine too much for you?" Princess Celestia asked pure concern in her voice.
  116. N*hurk* no Princess, just a stomach virus or something.
  117. >If 100 hooficures, and being Rarity's model for life could stop this from happening you would be there asking for the hoof polish
  118. >If kissing Discor-
  119. *BLARGH*
  120. >Ok bad thought
  121. >"Rainbow Dash your skill has earned you my approval, but you must go to a hospital to get checked out. The Wonderbolts will be here when you're cured," Celestia says her smile just a bit wider than usual.
  122. >And just like that life is golden. You're in the Wonderbolts, and after a bit of medicine you start living the dream
  123. >"Princess Twilight Sparkle," Twi and the girls were already teleported next to me by the time the third syllable left Celestia's mouth
  124. >"Yes Princess Celestia," Twilight answers as if she doesn't know her next words
  125. >"Please teleport Rainbow Dash to the Ponyville Hospital."
  126. >"Sure, Princess, but why not here? Cloudsdale has just as good a hospital."
  127. >"Yes, but I get the feeling Rainbow Dash will need her friends with her," looking happier than ever, "and your cloudwalking spell only has another three minutes left."
  128. >"Of course Princess," and in a flash that would exhaust most unicorns all five of you are in front of Ponyville hospital.
  129. >After a good 15 minutes of reading last years Daring Do in the waiting room Nurse Redheart leads us back to a room.
  130. >On the way we pass Applejack sleeping with Big Mac next to her looking like Flim and Flam came back.
  131. >"Hello Macintosh, is Applejack well?", Rarity asks concern in her voice.
  132. >"Eeyup" Big Mac growls out sounding more like a timberwolf than the big red lug we all know.
  133. >Most of the girls backed up a step in surprise
  134. >"Obviously not, if you're in this sort of mood. Tell us what happened to Applejack, we're worried," Rarity asks again unphased by Mac's mood.
  135. >"Enope," he replies sounding much more calm than before
  136. >"Well why not? Did she eat a bad apple? A good orange? Is she just sleepy? She should have a cupcake then! That always wakes me right up! Here!," Pinkie manages out in one breath while plucking a pristine cupcake from her mane, and setting it on the table next to the bed.
  137. >Nopony will ever understand that mare.
  138. >"She just got a bit a big news, ain't takin it well. Cain't take it well considerin, she'll tell you gals when she's good 'n ready. Sorry, jus ain't mah place ta say." Big Mac says, looking down at his unconscious sister
  139. >Immediately you wonder what news could be big enough to make AJ faint.
  140. >"Thanks Big Mac, let us know when she wakes up?" Twilight asks worried about AJ and curious about the news
  141. >"Um, girls. We need to get Rainbow to her room to get her checked out," Fluttershy says urging me forward
  142. She's right, we'll get the dirt on AJ after I get cured, and tell her MY big news!
  143. >You are escorted to a room just down the hall from AJ's
  144. >Redheart takes your temperature and all that and heads out to test your blood.
  145. >Only five minutes later Dr. Stable comes back in evenfaced while Redheart is giggling behind him.
  146. >"Um, Miss Dash I have a bit of news for you." he says calmly
  147. Uh, sure lay it on me Doc, can't be that bad of Redheart has the giggles.
  148. >"That's just a funny coincidence we had a patient come in earlier with the same news. In fact it was the first thing Nurse Redheart tested for," he says small grin on his face.
  149. >"Oh no, is it something going around?" Fluttershy asks clutching my foreleg.
  150. >Now the Doctor is laughing along with Redheart, "Yes actually."
  151. >"Doctor Patient Stable, please mind your bedside manner you are needlessly keeping us in suspense. Now we know the news isn't bad, but still," Rarity says getting the Doctor to drop his laughs to just some small giggles
  152. Ya know Doc, to be so jolly I'm still sick here
  153. >That shut him right up,"You're right Miss Dash I'll get to the point, now before I say do you wish for your friends to remain?"
  154. Yeah, they're my friends anything you have to tell me you can tell them.
  155. >"Alright, Rainbow Dash you are pregnant. Congratulations!" he says happily.
  156. impossible
  157. >"Ooh Rainbow, who is the lucky stallion"
  158. >"I'm s-so happy for you Rainbow Dash"
  159. >"How did you manage to keep him from us for so long?"
  160. >"Wow that was the doozy I had last month, I gotta plan a baby shower, a birthday, a cutecineria, oh I bet your baby will be great friends with Pumpkin and Pound, coulda sworn there were two doozies last month maybe twins!"
  161. Impossible
  162. >"I can't wait to try out a new line of pre and post-natal apparel. HA! Ponies will be getting pregnant just to try my new line!"
  163. >"I'll be happy to help you through the whole thing Rainbow, I just know your little foal will be just precious."
  164. >"Wait, why did you keep him from us for so long? We're your best friends Rainbow Dash."
  165. >"I can foalsit, I totally have experience, we can play games, and make cookies, and play some pranks, and make cupcakes, and nap, because naps are important for a growing foal, also it'll give me a chance to bake a cake!"
  166. IMPOSSIBLE!
  167. >"What?"
  168. >"W-what?"
  169. >"How?"
  170. >"Not really, when a mare and a stallion love each other very much, or just had too much alcohol and wanted to feel good and then wake up feeling nothing but regret and heartbreak because that bastard was already married. How dare he! He said he loved me! Now I'm stuck raising his bast-"
  171. >Every hoof flew into Pinkie's mouth, including hers
  172. >"I'm sorry Dashie, I didn't mean to imply."
  173. No I mean literally impossible, I haven't been with a stallion in over a year. The only time I've even been drunk was at Pinkie's party at AJ's
  174. >"Y-yes and the only stallion there was Big Mac, and he turned in early so he could get an early start on clearing out the cider cellar," Fluttershy said being the only one who was sober at the end of that night.
  175. >"Besides I cannot imagine Macintosh ever taking advantage of a mare in a compromised state," Rarity said in his defense
  176. >"*Ahem* all the same ladies, Miss Dash will be needing some help in the coming months, if you can think of any potential father we could easily test the paternity." Dr. Stable cut in noticing the conversation getting personal.
  177. I'm being serious girls I haven't been with any stallion and I haven't been getting drunk, its all been in training for the Won-
  178. >The Wonderbolts
  179. >Your dream
  180. >Your whole life
  181. >Done
  182. >"Well Rainbow Dash it doesn't necessarily need to be a stallion, offspring from griffin, pony couplings have yielded the occiais-"
  183. No Twilight, there hasn't even been a griffin on Ponyville since Gilda, and I'm really sure we couldn't yield anything.
  184. >"Well a foal doesn't just spontaneously generate, some guy hast to be the father," Twilight says frustrated her guesses aren't going anywhere
  185. But the last male I was with was, um...
  186. >"Gals, AJ's awake"
  187.  
  188. >Day rotten apples still
  189. >You are Applejack again
  190. >You have awakened after hearing the worst news of your life
  191. >And then being congratulated for it
  192. >Mac's looking at you, looks like the Doctor is gone
  193. Hey Macintosh, did the Doctor come back
  194. >"Eeyup"
  195. A-and did he tell me what was botherin my stomach
  196. >"Eeyup"
  197. And was that that I was preg- p-
  198. >*sigh*"Eeyup"
  199. >You can't even meet his gaze anymore, what is your life now
  200. >You can't buck apples next season
  201. >You can't haul the apples to market
  202. >In a matter of months you can't even sell them at the market
  203. >Cider season will worse than ever, and it was always tough keeping up with demand.
  204. >"Who?"
  205. Ah, ah dunno.
  206. >Mac looks at me a bit harder, thinking I'm protecting somepony no doubt.
  207. Ah mean it Mac, ah ain't been with a stallion since ah met Twilight and started this whole Harmony business.
  208. >"Who?"
  209. Macintosh that ain't neither here nor there, it was years ago, ah don't go 'round askin you what mares you mounted.
  210. >"Ain't got none with child."
  211. >You glare at him for a hot second, but in the end he is right.
  212. >You are pregnant, and aren't even married.
  213. >Your anger withers to simple despair
  214. Yer right, but ah mean it. Ah ain't had no relations with a stallion in years.
  215. >"Bar?"
  216. No, Mac ain't had a touch a drink since Pinkie's little get together at the end of cider season.
  217. You were the only stallion there, and you were almost as stone sober as Fluttershy
  218. >"Any come after?"
  219. No, it was just you and An-
  220. >"IMPOSSIBLE!"
  221. Was that Rainbow?
  222. >"Eeyup."
  223. Did you tell them?
  224. >"Nnope"
  225. Did they see me?
  226. >"Eeyup"
  227. Ask to get them when ah woke up?
  228. >"Eeyup"
  229. *sigh* don't suppose ah could hide it for long anyway.
  230. Go ahead and get 'em.
  231. >"Eeyup"
  232. >Big Mac walks out and gives you time to think
  233. >You, Dash, and Anon had a hell of a rut.
  234. >No stallions though
  235. >Can't be right though, Anon isn't any kind of Equine
  236. >He literally has zero hooves
  237. >He doesn't even walk on all fours
  238. >Everypony knows that if you get with a dog, drake, or minotaur the worst you get is humiliated parents
  239. >Ain't been nopony else though
  240. Ah can deny it all day but there is nopony else it could've been
  241. >"Applejack! Applejack! Applejack! Applejack, guess what it is the bestest most awesome thing that could've happened ever! Well aside from a cake that makes cupcakes, that makes cookies, that taste like they've already been dipped in milk!"
  242. That sounds uh, great Pinkie. Ah suppose Dash got into the Bolts then.
  243. >"Yep, yep, yep, and you should have seen it she was all BOOM then WOOSH then ZAP BOOM! It was the coolest thing ever! Then something even cooler happened!"
  244. >"Now Pinkie that news isn't yours to tell," Rarity said cutting off the endless stream of Pinkie's excitement, "It is for Rainbow Dash to say or not say."
  245. Wait, what happened ta Rainbow
  246. >"I'm fine Applejack, just a bit of news," she says flying in slowly alongside Fluttershy.
  247. Iffn you don't mind mah sayin, you look awful down for somepony who finally got on tha Wonderbolts.
  248. >"Don't remind me," she said with pure spite.
  249. What are ya on about now Rainbow, ya did it, your lifelong dream.
  250. Bolts this Bolts that, now that you're in tha Bolts you're mad, what happened Rainbow.
  251. >The girl looked like she was told she could never fly again
  252. >I've known Rainbow for a long time, I've seen her look down, but now she just looked beat.
  253. >"I'm pregnant AJ. There now everypony knows, assuming the Wonderbolts decide to keep me, I won't be able to fly for at least a year and nine months."
  254. >For the first time I've known Rainbow Dash she was crying. Not holding it back, or hiding it.
  255. >"By the time I can fly again, I'll be so out of shape I won't even qualify."
  256. >"I'll be out of the loop for so long nopony will know or care, beyond 'There's the stupid whorse who lost her one shot, and doesn't even know the stallion that knocked her up!'"
  257. >My eyes went wide, there was no doubt now.
  258. >I looked over at Mac, who was sitting on his haunches by the door.
  259. >He was too smart to not know what was going on.
  260. >The girls were already hugging Rainbow trying to calm her down.
  261. >Trying to convince her that this was a good thing.
  262. >"Um, Applejack," Fluttershy breaks me out of my shock
  263. >"W-what was the matter with you, when we came by you were unconscious. Are you alright?"
  264. >"That's right Fluttershy, but you seem fine now Applejack. What did the Doctor have to say to you?," Twilight asks, still hugging Rainbow.
  265. >No hiding it now, all I can do is hope the girls don't think less of us.
  266. What ah'm about to say cannot leave this room, not yet.
  267. >"Darling, please we have no intenti-"
  268. No Rarity ah mean it, all of ya have to Pinkie promise right now that what ah'm about to say doesn't leave this room
  269. >The girls all go through the motions, Pinkie being the only one to produce an actual cupcake.
  270. >That crazy mare
  271. You too, Macintosh. Pinkie promise me right now, or leave the room.
  272. >"Ugh, eeyup." he huffs as he goes through the motions. Mad that I noticed him.
  273. Ah'm pregnant too
  274. >"WHAT!" Everypony in the room is shocked except Big Mac
  275. Yep, and Dash ah'm sure we both came to the same conclusion, now if not before.
  276. >All eyes were on her, as usual Rarity was the first to speak up
  277. >"Scandalous! Both of you taken by some stud of a stallion, able to satisfy the two most athletic mares in Ponyville! A full minute of ecstasy!"
  278. >All the girls looked at Rarity like she had grown a second head, except Macintosh who looked at nothing like he wanted to tear a head off of somepony.
  279. >"You're sure about this Applejack, we both know he is-"
  280. The fact that it is both of us means that there ain't no other option, even if it does spits in the face of what we all learned in school.
  281. >"What do you mean Applejack?," Twilight asks teleporting in a quill, some ink, and a scroll.
  282. No, Twi. Ya Pinkie promised.
  283. >"I'm sorry Applejack, but you said that you aren't ready for it to get out yet. So I figured I could take some notes in the meantime. Of course I won't publish them without your consent."
  284. No, Twi, no notes, no studies, its far too soon to even consider it.
  285. >"Alright Applejack, I'm sorry, but when you said it spits in the face of what we were taught, I couldn't help myself."
  286. >"Honestly, Darling hold off I need to find out who this gift to mares is, now please continue uninterrupted Applejack."
  287. It is Anon
  288. >"ANON! But, but how. Applejack he is clearly bipedal."
  289. Ah know.
  290. >"But bipedal and quadrupedal races can't interbreed, this has been known since before Luna's banishment."
  291. Ah know, but he is the only male ah've been with since ah've known ya Twi.
  292. Ah'm willin to bet the same goes for you Dash.
  293. >Once again, all eyes were on the blue pegasus, who merely nodded
  294. Ah, thought we were safe. Ah mean he is bipedal, and from another world. It doesn't make sense that he can plant in mah field.
  295. >"We? You mean y-you mean both you and Rainbow," Fluttershy asked, unable to even finish the question.
  296. >"Yeah, AJ and I had a drinking contest, with Anon, when we finished off the cider one thing kinda led to another and..."
  297. >"Ho yeah! Best party of all year! I can't wait until my next SCSCC, maybe we can get Fluttershy to join in, and hopefully stop licking on Twilight's horn long enough to get in on the the action. I knew you guys were having fun in the loft, but I didn't think it was super ciderfilled sexytime fun that lasts for hours on end!"
  298. >"H-hours, but that's impossible and frankly inconvenient. I mean, how could a species get anything done if it takes that long to breed. How did they manage to evolve to the point of sentience if it takes so long to reproduce?"
  299. >"Twilight, dear that is far from the point. Our interplanetary guest has it in him to last longer than every stallion in Ponyville combined, allegedly."
  300. >"Um, that sounds nice and all, but that isn't the point either Rarity. Anon is apparently the father to two foals, or kids of our best friends. Not to insinuate we break a Pinkie promise, but he needs to be told."
  301. Yer right Fluttershy, just nopony else. Ah ain't ready for that kind of attention yet.
  302. >As you see the girls nod in agreement, Flutter unusually calm despite the subject matter, and Rarity unusually heated, you notice Big Mac try to sneak out.
  303. Macintosh, where do you think you're going?
  304. >"Gonna kill him"
  305. >He almost made it out of the door by how stunned we all were, by the simple stallion bringing out murder like it was just another apple to be eaten.
  306. Don't you dare even touch him!
  307. >"Ya'll expect me ta ignore tha fact that he took advantage of ya.
  308. >"Uh, Big Mac he didn't take advantage of us. It was kinda the other way around," Dash said earning the spotlight again.
  309. >"Ok, now this MUST be explained, darling."
  310. >"Anon wasn't really into ponies, and well we kinda loosened him up a bit to the idea.
  311. >Blank stares, you weren't even sure the girls were even breathing
  312. Yeah, Dash and ah had been way past drunk when we invited Anon to join our drinkin contest, n he was alredy tipsy himself.
  313. >"The only reason we both even remember that night was because he kept us awake, heh.
  314. >Macintosh looked at us for a good hard minute before speaking up again.
  315. >"Eeyup, gonna kill him."
  316. Mac, if you beat him up who is going to help us with the foals!
  317. >That stopped him good, he turned back around sat down, knowing that you had made too much sense.
  318. Ah, understand that ya want to protect me and all, but we were just bein adults havin a bit of fun. None of us thought that this would happen.
  319. >"It's true, in my studies of Anon, he told me that no different species could interbreed on his planet without being closely related, like primitive horses and donkeys or lions and tigers," Twilight added.
  320. >"And we told him that even here bi and quads couldn't make children, it was an accident. An accident that cost me everything, but still an accident," Rainbow finished, worlds calmer than before.
  321. >Having gotten over the shock, anger, and depression a bit you decided to speak up.
  322. It is about time we went over and told Anon this, ah know he planned for this just as much as we have, but it is only right he know.
  323. >With that we all left the hospital, picking up some medicine to help with the nausea, and some pamphlets on healthy pregnancy habits that Twilight insisted we needed.
  324. So Macintosh, you takin the stuff down to the farm?
  325. >"Eeno."
  326. Coming with us?
  327. >"Eeyuh."
  328. Gonna make sure Anon takes responsibility
  329. >"Eeyuh."
  330. Well, ah can't fault you for that. Just let me talk to him first, nopony will want to be near me if mah brother wants to rip 'em apart for talkin to me.
  331. >"Mmm eeyuh." He nods, finally resaonable enough to at least fake being calm.
  332. >So my best friends and brother make our way to Anon's place just outside of Ponyville
  333. >Getting strange looks thanks to Big Mac looking like he wanted to kill somepony with the bucket in his jaws.
  334.  
  335. >Day any other
  336. >You are Anon
  337. >The first, last, and greatest human in Equestria
  338. >And you are working out
  339. >Without the distractions of video games, the internet, or the endless stores of pornography within physical activities have become your entertainment
  340. >You were never a neckbeard before, but you weren't exactly fit either
  341. >Now?
  342. >You are an Adonis
  343. >Exercising just to get out of the house, since there isn't much for you there anyway
  344. >Especially since the most you could do is read a ponified version of a book
  345. >Of Mice and Mares was alright, though
  346. >But now you are running in the Whitetail Woods
  347. >Much better than the Everfree
  348. >Mostly because the animals know through Fluttershy to leave you alone
  349. >Then again, it could be that you hunted them for the first couple of weeks here before you found out that they were intelligent
  350. >Meh
  351. >You would think that Fluttershy would kill you or herself when she found out
  352. >But she was really understanding
  353. >She knew that carnivorous and omnivorous creatures needed to kill in order to survive
  354. >Circle of life and all that
  355. >She made a deal with you though, every week she would provide you fish and in exchange you would not hunt her animal friends
  356. >That is why you are heading to her place right now
  357. >Your brisk pace gets you there in minutes, not that you were far away anyway
  358. >You knock on the door, and Angel answers
  359. Hey little dude, I'm here for my fish
  360. >He immediately opens the door and leads you inside
  361. >According to everyone else Angel is a real bastard, but you haven't seen it
  362. >In fact Fluttershy has noticed a real improvement in his behavior, he eats whatever she gives him without complaint
  363. >Then again it could be that he knows that she is the only reason you haven't gutted and eaten him as nature intended
  364. >He leads you to the kitchen and pulls a cooler out of the refrigerator containing three decent sized fish.
  365. >Taking it you head out the door giving Angel a wave
  366. See you next week little dude
  367. >He closes the door behind you gently
  368. >With no business left you decide to run home
  369. >Might head out again later, maybe try to engage the townsfolk
  370. >Too many of them are still scared of you, and after being here over a year it is getting old
  371. >Especially now that there is a break between cider and apple buck season, so you can't work with AJ and Mac
  372. >Can't talk to critters so you can't really help Fluttershy
  373. >You're just terrifying enough to scare away customers if you're seen baking food that children may eat
  374. >Twilight is more or less done interviewing you, and Spike has any jobs she may have locked down
  375. >Can't beat free labor
  376. >Maybe you could help out Rarity digging for gems, and guarding her from those dumbshit dogs
  377. >Plus you need to put some time in with Rarity, she has a nice soft ass
  378. >And you finally arrive home, ready to clean up and relax
  379. >As soon as you enter you put the cooler on the table and your clothes in the laundry bin
  380. >Hopping in the shower you wash your stink off and reflect on how awesome your life is, considering the fact you'll never have sex with a woman again
  381. >Admittedly your performance at Pinkie's bash at AJ's wasn't your best, but when 25 seconds is considered decent sex even a virgin can make stallions weep with envy
  382. >Had to get a bit drunk though, give that last push from cute talking animals, to cute hoofed girls
  383. >Just the right amount of drunk
  384. >Drunk enough to use your tongue on a pony, but not so drunk you couldn't use your dick
  385. >That is how you found out that you may as well be a fertility god here
  386. >Well without the fertility part
  387. >Your line dies in Equestria
  388. >You will never teach your son to play any sports, or find peace in fishing
  389. >You will never threaten the life of some poor bastard that has the hots for your daughter
  390.  
  391. >And you are so happy for that
  392. >Who has time for that shit
  393. >Fuck kids
  394. >Little fuckers take the joy out of good sex
  395. >No need to worry about that here though
  396. >Even in a magical world where hybrids exist you don't qualify
  397. >Plus there is like a four to one ratio in favor of mares here
  398. >Though a scant few can even look at you without cowering
  399. >You could be up to your ears in mares if you let slip AJ's and Dash's bisexual adventure though
  400. >But you're not a dick
  401. >It is one of your failings
  402. >Getting out of the shower you head downstairs toweling off fuck clothes nobody here but you
  403. >You then turn on the one thing that made the trip to Equestria and survived the two weeks in the Everfree
  404. >Your shit iPod
  405. >Set it Guile's theme and hit repeat
  406. >Takes you back to beating your brother in Street Fighter 2 back in the 90's
  407. >He would always pick Chun, he would always spam kicks, and he would always lose
  408. >You kinda miss telling him to go home and be a family man and hear that lovely hate filled groan birthed from years of well placed Sonic Booms and Flash Kicks
  409. >Him not being here is the one thing keeping Equestria from being perfect
  410. >Tell anyone else that and they either thank you or ask what a man is
  411. >Fuck
  412. >You'll never see him again
  413. >And just in time to keep you from falling into the trap of being a morose motherfucker you hear a few knocks at the door
  414. >Wrapping your towel around yourself and cutting off your iPod you open the door a crack to see all six girls and are so glad you didn't masturbate
  415. >Then you see a pretty dour looking Big Mac and wish you masturbated when you had the chance
  416. Um, give me a second girls I'm a little indecent
  417. >"Nonny we have super important news, more important than frosting on a cake, than on a cupcake, than on an eclair, THAN ON A SPOON NONNY! MORE IMPORTANT THAN SPOONLICKING, ANON"
  418. >Pinkie, of course, burst through the door and into your face to relay this message.
  419. >Clamping onto your chest like an adorable cotton candy scented facehugger
  420. >This had the unwanted side effect of nearly exposing your barely concealed erection which is about eye level to all the girls
  421. >And Pinkie oblivious to what she is inches above, or very aware and milking your embarrassment to feed her otherworldly powers, is swishing her tail back and forth across the relatively thin terrycloth above it
  422. >Making sure you stay firm despite your humiliation
  423. Erm Pinks, still kind of indecent here. Mind of I go change and cover my shame?
  424. >"Okie dokie lokie Nonny," she says sliding down off of you like a fireman
  425. >Down your fireman
  426. >Before things could somehow get anymore awkward you run upstairs to put on some clothes
  427. >"Wowie! If that is Nonny's shame I can't wait to see his pride," Pinkie says before cackling like a madmare
  428. >Even in your bedroom you can hear the girls' laughter
  429. >Quickly tossing on one of the more casual outfits Rarity made for you, you head back downstairs to see that they all made themselves at home before falling somewhat silent as you descend
  430. >Oddly enough it is Fluttershy that breaks the awkward silence
  431. >"Anon, I see you got your fish today. Did Angel Bunny give you any trouble?"
  432. None at all Fluttershy, little dude has yet to even look at me the wrong way.
  433. >"Good, I'm glad he is still being well behaved. I put it in your fridge, and switched it for the empty one."
  434. >"Now Fluttershy, we didn't come here to Anonymous's home to discuss fish, bunnies, or catch him in a compromising, yet enticing, position," Rarity says adding a touch of seductive silk to her voice at the end.
  435. >"That's right Anon, girls I believe you have something rather important to say to him," Twilight says nudging AJ and Dash.
  436. >AJ and Dash, FUCK Mac found out about the threesome and told the girls
  437. >You really don't want to fight Big Mac
  438. >He is one of the only cool guys in this town
  439. >Poppa Anon didn't raise no punk though
  440. >You will make him into a grosser pile of meat than the McDonald's meal of the same name
  441. >Then again, maybe it is something else having to do with Rainbow, Applejack, and yourself so you just remain calm, quiet, and listen
  442. >Momma Femanon didn't raise no fool
  443. >So you put on a nice smile and sit back on your loveseat opposite the couch where the girls are all sitting
  444. Sure, what did you girls want to tell me?
  445. >Applejack gets up and walks to you
  446. >Slowly steadily, her beautiful green eyes focused on yours
  447. >She sits down in front of you and sighs, obviously getting ready to tell you something she'd rather not tell
  448. >"Anon, ah don't know how to put this any other way than straight, so ah won't beat around the bush none."
  449. >You wipe the grin off your face, and sit up straight.
  450. >Whatever this is means a lot to her, and isn't a laughing matter if she needed the support of her friends and brother just to come say it
  451. >So you give her your full attention
  452. >You aren't a dick
  453. Go ahead and say what you need to AJ, I won't feel any different about you. You're still gonna be my best friend, boss lady.
  454. >She chuckles at the nickname you use while working for her
  455. >All the girls seem to visibly relax a bit
  456. >Even Big Mac goes from 'I'm gonna kill dis nigga' mad to a tepid 'Don't make me choke a bitch' mad
  457. >"*sigh* Anon, ah'm pregnant."
  458. >What
  459. >That's it
  460. >Why give a shit
  461. >A second ago AJ looked like she found out apples gave you cancer
  462. >And that cancer existed in Equestria
  463. >Well she is the one carrying the little bastard, so it would be big to her
  464. >Still you aren't a dick
  465. >And she is still your friend
  466. >And a pretty good fuck too
  467. >So you scoop that silly pony up in a nice, close, reassuring hug
  468. Applejack, is that all?
  469. >"What, Anon, ah thought-"
  470. Don't even worry about it, if this is some country fried notion that you are any less a mare because you aren't married yet you can throw that shit out the window
  471. You are still one of my best friends, and I'll help you through it.
  472. >You can feel a couple tears on your neck, she really needed this
  473. >Just like that all the tension in the room evaporated
  474. >Even Big Mac dropped down to 'Dis nigga cool'
  475. >No idea why you gauge his emotions in terms Niggisms
  476. >"Rainbow, maybe you should share the good news as well. Anon is proving his people to be quite understanding," Twilight says pushing Dash forward.
  477. >Unlike AJ, Rainbow dash is looking everywhere but at you as she flies over
  478. >And she looks like life has kicked her in the ovaries pretty hard
  479. Come on Dash, I doubt you can match AJ's bombshell
  480. >Pinkie started having a giggle fit, when you said that
  481. >"Actually, Anon, I can. I'm pregnant too," she says looking at your very interesting wall
  482. >You lean up a bit and grab her out of the air with your free arm
  483. Get in here you
  484. >"Hey you don't have to get all mushy on me"
  485. Oh, shut up. I don't know how you guys do things in Equestria, but you girls don't have anything to worry about as far as I'm concerned.
  486. This isn't some horrible doom cloud here to end the world, it is just a couple babies.
  487. >Rainbow doesn't fight the hug, but she doesn't look like she loves it either
  488. >You can imagine why an athlete isn't looking forward to the joys of motherhood
  489. >"Oh, Anon, that is so wonderful to hear, we were so worried you would be upset," Fluttershy says as she floats over to hug on Dash.
  490. >"Once again, Anonymous proves himself a stellar example of a gentlecolt. I told you girls you had nothing to fear," Rarity says as she joins in on Applejack's hug nuzzling your face a bit.
  491. >Gotta put in some time with that mare
  492. >"Well Anon, I don't know if being this understanding is baseline for your species, but it is commendable nonetheless," Twilight adds hugging onto Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash.
  493. >"CUDDLE PUDDLE!"Pinkie screams before jumping into the pile of mares and ending up perched on your head giggling at her own antics.
  494. >"Eeyup" Mac finishes still sitting on your recliner, looking really proud of something.
  495. Alright girls get up, this is exactly how I want to die, but not yet though.
  496. >All of the girls reluctantly get up, except Pinkie who merely dropped from your head and is now riding you piggyback
  497. >And Rarity who is sitting next to you, leaning on your arm eyes closed and smiling
  498. Ok ladies, this might get awkward, but I have to ask.
  499. >They all look at you smiles on their faces, except for Dash who while much better than when she came clearly isn't as happy as the rest
  500. Who're the lucky stallions?
  501.  
  502. >Day dramatic tension
  503. >You are still Anon
  504. >And you think you may have found a paralyzing spell
  505. >None of the ponies have moved since you asked about the fathers of AJ's and Dash's foals
  506. >Pure shock on each face
  507. >Even Big Mac's
  508. >There is only two places this leads
  509. >One is big red and kinda disgusting
  510. >Though not wholly unexpected
  511. >The other
  512. >Holy shit
  513. >You really hope that it isn't what you're starting to think it is
  514. >You will straight up murder a pony if it is
  515. Could one of you answer me?
  516. I'm starting to think that I should go get an angry mob together.
  517. >"No, oh by Celestia, no Anon. Nopony did that!," Twilight says a little disgusted that the pleasant conversation was going towards
  518. >rape
  519. >"Darling, please no need to breach such horrid subjects there was no foul play involved in the conception of the foals," Rarity says trying to calm everyone down.
  520. Good, but that doesn't explained why you guys blue-screened on me.
  521. >"Excuse me?"
  522. Human term Twilight, all of you just froze up in shock when I asked. What was I supposed to expect?
  523. >"Oooooh Nonny doesn't know, can I tell him, I can let him down easy and we could all shed a single masculine tear together, like those buffaloes in the old stampeding grounds commercials! Or, or I can just rip the band-aid off and scream NONNY ___'__ ___ ______!" Pinkie screamed, somehow spoiler protecting her own speech.
  524. >"Pinkie calm down, and quit confusing everypony," Twilight said.
  525. >"Ooh or we can make it like Marey Pullbits and tell him he isn't only to switch back and say he is when he is doing the zebra jig so that AJ and Dashie can do the zebra jig! Or even better we can make it into a guessing game! Nonny who do you think are the fathers of Applejack's and Dashie's foals?"
  526. Uh, Caramel and Thunderlane?
  527. >"Caramel? That tran-"
  528. >"THUNDERLANE you think I would lift my tail for bucking THUNDERLANE?!," Dash roars flying right up in your face.
  529. Nope, but it is better to see you mad than depressed.
  530. >"I uh.."
  531. >"Ooh he got you so good Dashie, I've been trying to get you to out of that funk all day! Why do you think they call it a funk anyway? Think it is because it looks like you're always smelling a moldy cupcake that you left under the oven in case of a cupcake based emergency, and couldn't reach because your hooves were too short? Or because it is the face you make when you get funkay! But that has to mean a different thing! Funky, Funkay which do you think is better Applejack? Funky or Funkay, Funky funk getting Funkay tee hee hee!"
  532. >"PINKIE you are getting way off topic. Now, I'm sorry I had to shout, but Anon asked a question. I know you're excited, but I have to remind you that this is their big announcement not yours."
  533. >"You're right Fluttershy, I'm sorry."
  534. >"Now as we were tryin ta say," Applejack says tapping on Dash's head to get her to stop grumbling about that lazy bucking Thunderlane, "The father of our foals is-"
  535. Wait, 'father', singular? Oh wow what party did I mis-
  536. >"Its you Anon, you bucking idiot," Dash shouts crushing your admittedly pathetic attempt to distract.
  537. >Now it is your turn to stare at nothing in shock
  538. >You knew it
  539. >You knew it when it was both of them that had an announcement
  540. >You knew it when Dash was depressed on the day of her Wonderbolts tryouts
  541. >You knew when Big Mac was looking like someone fucked his sister
  542. >"-onny?"
  543. >You knew it when Dash couldn't even look you in the eye
  544. >"-sn't funn-"
  545. >You knew it when it took all of Applejack's willpower all of her friends, and her brother to just say she was pregnant
  546. >"-erously Nonn-"
  547. >You knew it when Applejack cried tears of joy at you accepting her
  548. >"ANONYMOUS!" Pinkie screams directly in your ear
  549. >You only reaction is to carefully put a finger over her mouth, silencing her
  550. Another minute please.
  551. >You can't tell how the mares are reacting to you right now, there is a bee outside and you're too invested in seeing which flower it picks to pollinate
  552. >Outwardly anyway
  553. >Inside, your mind is racing, and fighting over where to go from here
  554. >Even if you do the right thing, one mare ends up out in the cold.
  555. >Not to mention that you barely know either of them enough to do the right thing, and be ok with it.
  556. >All you wanted was a fun night, you didn't even want to fuck ponies when that damn party started
  557. >This shit is supposed to be impossible, you're not even close in species
  558. But we're not even close in species
  559. >You weren't even talking to anyone, just tossing words in the air
  560. But we're not even close in species
  561. >You say to the girls, it is a small flimsy defense, but it is yours
  562. >"We know that, Anon, but according to both Applejack and Rainbow Dash you were the last *ahem* male company either of them...engaged with," Twilight said trying her best to avoid talking about sex.
  563. >"Nonny, you're not sad now are you?," Pinkie asks clutching your neck a little tighter and laying her head on top of yours
  564. >You aren't sad, pissed, shocked, confused? Definitely, but sad, no.
  565. >You're even a little glad you aren't sad, AJ would be able to tell in a heartbeat, and you would be an even bigger hypocritical fuck if you were after reassuring her.
  566. No Pinkie, I'm not sad, pretty shocked though, and more than a little confused.
  567. >"Well that is something I am hoping to clear up in the coming months, Anon," Twilight says with a frightening cheer to her voice. "If Rainbow Dash's and Applejack's claims are true then for the first time in Equestrian history a bipedal species has managed to interbreed with a quadrupedal one. Discounting the fact that you may have disproved thousands of years of scientific fact in one night you will be the the progenitor of an entirely new species. I cannot wait to see the results of such hybridization. Bipedal, or quadrupedal, furry, or hairless, will they be a pure lateral hybrid like hippogriffs, or will they take qualities from each parent like mules and zebroids?"
  568. >"Um, Twilight"
  569. >"And that isn't even factoring in the entirely new magical studies that will have to take place, by the result of a species crossed from magical and non-magical parents! An entire new field of magical study will be found! In our time! This is big, Starswirl the Bearded's Animorphic spell big, and I'll be at the forefront! They'll name a wing at Princess Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns after me! It'll be my greatest honor and achievement! Lectures will be given based on my studies, and my mere musings will be pontificated on for centuries to come!"
  570. >"Twilight, you stop right there Missy. How dare you, how DARE you?! Treating two unborn foals like test subjects, for shame. I know you love to learn new things, but that is no reason to disregard their lives as mere study." Fluttershy said looking livid, but somehow still adorable.
  571. >"Mere study! MERE STUDY!" Twilight then stops and takes a deep breath while making a weird motion with her hoof, "*sigh* Alright Fluttershy. I'll admit that I may have taken things too far, but do not disregard the greatest scientific discovery in our generation as mere study."
  572. >"Twilight I-"
  573. >"AND my studies will be important to both parents and foals. The faster and more thorough my studies, the better prepared we will be during their development, birth, and life. I'm sorry again Fluttershy for my zeal, and I'm sorry Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and Anon for seeming callous. However without knowing anything about your child, we won't know how to treat it in case of illness or injury."
  574. Um apology accepted
  575. >"No problem Twi."
  576. >"Whatever."
  577. >"Thank you," Twilight says that insane look leaving her eyes, "So, Anon we will pick up our interviews again tomorrow, nothing can be withheld, your children may depend on it."
  578. >You look over to see Big Mac staring intently at you
  579. >Not furious, but the look of a big brother looking at the guy who fucked his little sister
  580. >You then turn and look at Rarity, being oddly quiet despite the drama playing out around her
  581. Heh, enjoying the show Rarity?
  582. >"Oh darling, I'm just waiting for the grand finale," she says laughing quietly.
  583. >Grand finale? What could that be, the drama bomb has been dropped you are allegedly the father of two.
  584. >With two baby-mommas.
  585. >Fuck, you aren't black enough to handle this shit
  586. >May as well bite the bait, just to distract from wanting to 'go get a pack of smokes'
  587. >It is hard not being a dick
  588. Well, why wait? Lets cut to the chase already.
  589. >"Just remember, you asked for it," Rarity whispers in your ear before sitting up straight, and saying a bit louder, "So where will you go from here, Anon?"
  590. >Oh shit
  591. >"Surely you intend to take responsibility, for your part in all of this, darling."
  592. >Oh Fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck
  593. >Now you have the full and undivided attention of every pony in the room
  594. >None more than Big Mac, who is full on 'wish a nigga would'
  595. >Shit shit shit shit
  596. >Wait
  597. >The only winning move is not to play
  598. >Momma Femanon didn't raise no fool
  599. I can't
  600. >"EENOPE!" Big Mac growled out
  601. >"Now, calm down Macintosh" Applejack says getting in front of him
  602. >"Eenope." Mac replies.
  603. Hold it Mac, I didn't say I won't, I said I can't.
  604. >All the girls are looking worried at the prospect of a fight, except Rarity who is complely calm and has resumed leaning against you, and Pinkie who is humming a tune on your head.
  605. You guys are in the off season, can't fly to help with the weather, can't bake at Sugarcube Corner without running out half the customers, Spike has the library taken care of, can't talk to animals, and can't sew anything.
  606. Can't really work for anyone else because most of the townspeople are still scared of me.
  607. I can keep myself just fine. Because push comes to shove I can be self sufficient, and just take what I need from nature. Taking care of anyone else? No chance.
  608. >"Well," Rarity says, slipping off the loveseat, "if mere employment is your problem I believe I can be of help. At least for a time."
  609. What do you mean Rarity?
  610. >She paces in front of you nonplussed by the upset red stallion off to her side
  611. >"Like you said, we are in the off season. That means I must restock for next season's line, All About Amethyst," she says with dramatic flare. Seemingly waiting for a spotlight to appear, "This will take me fairly close to Diamond dog territory, and while I trust little Spikey Wikey, I couldn't forgive myself if I put him in harm's way again. He is, after all, just a baby dragon. However I'm sure a fine example of a man, such as yourself, will be in no danger."
  612. >"Also Anonymous, I will be willing to reimburse you for your time at the interviews and your willingness to perform a few simple tests. In fact, I can start tomorrow," Twilight says, putting the last nail in the coffin of your defense.
  613. >"And that's that, so Anonymous I'll ask again where will you go from here?" Rarity asks smiling sweetly
  614. >This mare is good
  615. >"Weddin," Big Mac says surprising the whole room.
  616. Uh, no I'm not.
  617. >"Uh, no he's not." you and Applejack both reply without missing a beat
  618. >"Tradition. No Apple is born outta wedlock," Big Mac says
  619. >"Now, Big Mac, ah know yer tryin ta protect me, bu-"
  620. >"Eenope," Big Mac says cutting off AJ,"Ah'm tryin to protect the family, no bastards born in the Apple clan."
  621. >"And what about Rainbow and her foal Macintosh?" Applejack asks, "Are we jus supposed to leave her high and dry."
  622. >Big Mac took a second to look at Rainbow Dash, who had more or less excused herself from the conversation since telling you that you are the father of her child.
  623. >Head on the couch's armrest looking at nothing, just looking tired and uninterested.
  624. >Only her ear twitching when her name was said is the only thing indicating that she is even awake.
  625. >"Ah care about her, Applejack. Ah care about all yer friends, but family comes first. Always."
  626. >"Now now, everypony. Everything doesn't need to be decided tonight." Rarity cuts in
  627. >"Night?," Twilight looks out the window to confirm, "Oh no! I need to get back to the library, I need to prepare my laboratory for the tests, and Spike must be worried sick."
  628. >"Oh dear, I need to go home and feed my nocturnal animal friends. Gerald the lemur should already on his way, poor sweetie must be starving. Um, Rainbow, are you ok?"
  629. >Finally getting up and taking a quick stretch Dash floats off the couch and heads to the door
  630. >"I'm fine Fluttershy, just tired, I'll see you tomorrow alright."
  631. >"Ok Rainbow Dash, be careful."
  632. >"Sure," Rainbow Dash says then takes off towards her home.
  633. >Fluttershy, flying just above ground heads off to her house
  634. >"I should be off as well, Sweetie Belle will be over tomorrow and I need to be awake early to receive her. Anonymous, I expect to see you at the boutique Monday bright and early."
  635. Sure thing, my lady.
  636. >You give her a mock bow.
  637. >"Please, Anonymous. Miss, or Miss Rarity shall suffice during business hours. Pinkie come along, I know you have to be up early too, Saturday mornings are your busiest after all."
  638. >"But Rarity, Nonny's head is sooooo comfy." Pinkie says rubbing your scalp with her head
  639. >"But who will tuck in Gummy, if not you Pinkie."
  640. >Pinkie immediately pops up and hops off and is at the door in an instant
  641. >"You're right Rarity, I'd hate to see Gummy all grumpypants because he stayed up too late. Bye bye Nonny!"
  642. >Pinkie then bounces out the door with Rarity following behind
  643. >Applejack and Big Mac head toward your door to take their leave as well
  644. >"Ain't done" Mac says, then turns and snorts before walking out.
  645. >"Ah'm sorry about Macintosh, he means well, but he acts like ah'm still a filly when it comes to fellers."
  646. No problem, comes with being a big brother.
  647. >Applejack then rears up on her hind legs and gives you a hug, her head reaching your chest.
  648. >One which you gently return
  649. >"Ah wouldn't mind it so much, ya know."
  650. >Before you can reply she is already down and out the door.
  651. >You smile and close the door behind her
  652. >You walk into the kitchen, nearly tripping over a small wooden bucket and munch on some leftover salad for dinner.
  653. >After your food you head upstairs to bed, stripping down to your boxer-briefs
  654. >Damn comfy
  655. >As you fall asleep all you can wonder is how you went from making plans to give little miss Diamondback the D, to working a job and subjecting yourself to Twilight's 'simple tests' just to help with the offspring you never wanted nor thought you'd have
  656. >Ain't life beautiful
  657.  
  658.  
  659. >Night somewhat less rotten apples
  660. >You are Applejack again
  661. >And that talk with Anon left you with a warm feeling in your heart
  662. >He brought you back up when you were feeling mighty low
  663. >And was willing to do his part
  664. >Took the fact that a night of fun, the entire premise of which was the impossibility of a pregnancy, led to two pregnancies much better than anypony else would've
  665. >Yourself included
  666. >You will have to get him alone with Rainbow and you soon
  667. >It'll take a lot more work to bring her out of her depression
  668. >Mostly because she has no experience with it.
  669. >You'll also have to get both of you closer to Anon
  670. >Like it or not you guys are going to be tied together for life, one way or another
  671. >Plenty of time for that though
  672. >Then the nausea hits again
  673. >You pull out of your reverie and spill in the bucket you had Mac bring
  674. >Or at least where it would've been if that fool Macintosh had brought it instead of posturing to Anon.
  675. *urk* Just hooves?
  676. >"Ugh, Nope."
  677. Sorry
  678. >"Eeyup."
  679. Should've remembered the bucket
  680. >"*sigh* Eeyup."
  681.  
  682. >Night couldn’t be awesome if Daring Do needed you to adventure again.
  683. >You are Rainbow Dash
  684. >Fastest flier in Equestria, the world, Equestria Games medalist, Hero of Equestria, Airmare First Class of the Wonderbolts
  685. *sigh*
  686. >And a stupid whorse
  687. >You lay upon your now darkened bed, not even caring if it goes full thunderhead
  688. >You just want to sleep while whatever your cider addled brain allowed inside you continues to grow
  689. >Feeding off of you
  690. >Like a parasite
  691. >For the rest of your life
  692. I-I could just give the little monster up
  693. >Are you really thinking this?
  694. >One trip Manehattan, one outpatient procedure, maybe a couple of awkward questions, and you’re free
  695. >You’d just have to kill the thing.
  696. >Kill
  697. >Could you really kill your child?
  698. >You groan and roll over trying to get more comfortable.
  699. >It isn’t a child yet, it isn’t a foal yet
  700. >It’s just a thing, doesn’t even have a gender yet.
  701. >It isn’t even thinking yet.
  702. >But it is alive.
  703. >It couldn’t feed off of you if it wasn’t.
  704. Ugh, why can’t I just sleep?!
  705. I just don’t want to forget this for a while.
  706. I just want to be able to dream again…
  707. >You hate being like this.
  708. >Your eyelids start to get heavy
  709. >You’ve been so weak and mushy all day.
  710. >You aren’t acting like a Wonderbolt
  711. >Maybe because you aren’t a Wonderbolt
  712. >Didn’t even get your uniform
  713. >Stupid whorse
  714. >You close your eyes, the fatigue of the day finally allowing you to sleep.
  715.  
  716. >Day couldn’t be more awesome if there were two of me
  717. >You are First Lieutenant Rainbow Dash
  718. >Fastest flier in the universe, creator of the Buccaneer Blitz, bodyguard and inspiration of Daring Do, personal flight trainer of Princess Celestia and Luna, and Equestria Games gold medalist
  719. >In every event
  720. >Five years running
  721. >Solo
  722. >You’re flying with Captain Soarin
  723. >To see Lieutenant General Spitfire
  724. >For another promotion no doubt
  725. >You could’ve been there and back seventeen times, but you don’t want to make the Cap look too bad
  726. >You’re super humble and cool like that
  727. Hey Captain?
  728. >”Yes my super awesome Lieutenant, who would and should be my superior, but isn’t because she is so humble and cool and turned down Princess Celestia’s endorsement to Brigadier General?”
  729. Can you tell me when the next show is?
  730. Beating down jerks, spies, and ninjas has been fun, but I miss entertaining the everyday pony.
  731. >”Actually the next show is after the meeting with the Lieutenant General.”
  732. >”Since you don’t have to practice at all, because you’re so awesome, we just didn’t tell you.
  733. You’re supposed to tell me where they are Cap, doing a show in Fillydelphia and Trottingham at the same time is rough.
  734. I was almost winded.
  735. >”I wish I was as cool and fast as you.”
  736. >Poor colt was getting down on himself again.
  737. >He gets soft like this every once in a while since you won that first gold medal in the relay.
  738. >Kinda tough making up for Fluttershy and Tank
  739. >Not too tough for you though.
  740. As long as you’re awesome to yourself and your team, you’re awesome to me.
  741. Now come on, I don’t want to break out the Rainbow Warp to make it back to the Amarezon to find a few more artifacts for Daring.
  742. >Just like that you and Soarin hit sub Rainboom speed.
  743. >”Goo goo”
  744. >Suddenly a heavy weight hits your back
  745. >You look back to see a foal
  746. >Must’ve saved it by accident
  747. >”Mama”
  748. >Just then you look down to see a baby hanging from your neck
  749. >Just a small version of Anonymous
  750. Woah, kiddos, I am noponies’ momma.
  751. >You slow down to sub awesome speed so they don’t fall
  752. >”Mommy!”
  753. >Suddenly there is some weird thing hanging from your back hoof
  754. >Looks like Anon, but covered in peach fur, with its small muzzle scrunched in effort to hold on with furry hands as her back hooves clack together
  755. >Absolutely disgusting
  756. >Before you have a chance to shake the abomination off another small thing is on your head
  757. >”Momma, Dashbro Blitz took my dolly, tell him to give it back!”
  758. >A blue Tirek with Anon’s face and extra eyelashes sits upon your head
  759. >Only now do you notice that their extra weight is starting to pull you down
  760. H-hey, I’ll just drop you guys off on the ground and I’m sure your real mom wi-
  761. >”Rainbow Unknown is fibbing, I didn’t take her stupid doll!”
  762. >This one is lying lazily across your flank, hiding a doll behind his wings
  763. >His hooves holding onto you, while his feet kick lazily in the breeze
  764. >You’re losing altitude kinda fast now
  765. >This isn’t cool at all
  766. Soarin, help me out here!
  767. >Soarin appears behind you out of nowhere
  768. >”Why would I help some stupid whorse nopony?”
  769. Soarin, w-what are you talking about we’re friends and teammates.
  770. >”Teammates? I’m with the Wonderbolts, random nopony, the best fliers in all of Equestria. You’re having trouble just staying in the air.”
  771. B-but
  772. >You’re falling like a rock now, fighting back tears
  773. >”You’ll never be a Wonderbolt, nopony, not in that shape.”
  774. >You look down and see that your, firm stomach is now swollen with foal
  775. >You look down on the ground and see Anon, looking up smiling a cruel smile.
  776. >He starts to speak, mouth filled with razor sharp teeth
  777. >”Ah, there’s my little broodmare. Shouldn’t you be feeding the others?”
  778. >You then notice that Anonymous isn’t standing on a hill, but a literal mountain of fillies, colts, babies, and foals.
  779. >You look down and notice that your teats have swollen to proportion with your stomach, each leaking an abundance of milk
  780. >You’re dropping like a meteor now
  781. >”Mommy I’m hungry.”
  782. >The filly on your back says
  783. >You flap your wings harder than you ever have before, but you don’t even slow down
  784. >”Mommy I’m hungry”
  785. >Repeats the baby boy on your neck
  786. No
  787. >”Mommy we’re hungry”
  788. >Say the hybrids
  789. Please
  790. >”Mommy I’m thirsty.”
  791. >Begins the wretch on your leg
  792. Stop
  793. >The tears start now, running down the fur beneath your eyes dripping into the thirsty maws below you
  794. >”Mommy we’re hungry”
  795. >Chants the mountain of young below you
  796. I can’t do this, it isn’t right, I don’t deserve this!
  797. >”Of course you can, honey.
  798. >”You did it yesterday; you’ll do it today, and tomorrow and every day after that!
  799. >”You’re my beautiful little broodmare.”
  800. NO! I JUST WANT TO LIVE MY LIFE!
  801. >”You’re a mother now, this is your life!”
  802. This nightmare can’t be my life!
  803. >”INDEED IT ISN’T!”
  804. >Just then a shockwave blew away the mountain of foals, and fake Anonymous like they were made of sand
  805. >Your body turns back into the lithe shape you’ve worked years to attain
  806. >The children clinging on your body started to fade away too, one by one.
  807. >The last two, the foal and baby each gave you one last hug as they faded.
  808. >”We love you mommy.”
  809. >Gone
  810. >Those words sent a shiver down your spine
  811. >And a pain through your heart
  812. This is only a dream, thank Cel-
  813. >You look over to the dark alicorn as she appears from nothing
  814. >Her eyebrow raised slightly, face unamused
  815. Erm, thank Luna
  816. >”You are welcome, Loyalty, sister told us of your plight just as Twilight left Cloudsdale with the other Elements.”
  817. >You couldn’t have heard that right
  818. Celestia knew?
  819. >”Of course she did, just a simple spell, while you were busy regurgitating.”
  820. Why didn’t she just tell me?
  821. >”We never asked, but would it really be better if the fact that you are with foal was announced before hundreds of ponies?”
  822. Uh, heh, no.
  823. >”Now, back to your dream Loyalty, what makes you fear the young so?”
  824. *sigh* Okay, but this cannot leave….wherever we are.
  825. >”We are in the dreamscape, Loyalty, where we traverse each night ensuring peaceful rest for all of our subjects”
  826. >”As to your oath, noponies’ dreams are shared with anypony else. It would be a most heinous betrayal to our subjects, should their personal desires and fears be shared with the waking world.”
  827. Hmm, ok, I’ll trust you Princess.
  828. >You sit down on the…nothing below you, which is strangely comfortable and catch Luna up
  829. >Who the father was, how AJ is preggers too, how you’ll never be a Wonderbolt.
  830. >Nothing was spared.
  831. >She was kinda in your head, why bother.
  832. So Princess that was how I became a whorse
  833. >Feeling down again after recounting your many failures
  834. That’s why I’m thinking of taking a trip down to Manehattan and getting rid of it
  835. >”Hmm, sister has told us of THAT particular procedure, and while we personally do not agree with it, it is not our decision to make.”
  836. Yeah, while the girls are sure to hound me a bit, especially Fluttershy, it really is for the best.
  837. >”Perhaps, perhaps not, Loyalty.
  838. What do you mean, Princess?
  839. >”You see, while the choice seems obvious now, you shouldn’t so quickly decide to end something that could be great.”
  840. Well, maybe, but I AM great.
  841. Present tense, don’t need to take a few years off being great, for some leech that’ll just bleed me for the next few years.
  842. >”Well then, Loyalty, follow us, and see where your choice would lead.”
  843. >Just then an open door appeared beside the two of you
  844. >You couldn’t see where it leads, since wherever it led was too bright to see.
  845. No problem, Princess, but I know I’m right.
  846. >With your fear squashed down, you fly through the portal, with no hesitation
  847. >Just like a Wonderbolt would
  848.  
  849. --
  850.  
  851. >What you see once you step through is…
  852. >Admittedly anticlimactic
  853. >It is just the outskirts of Ponyville, near where Anon’s house would be
  854. Uh, Princess, did you hit a wrong turn? We’re just outside of Ponyville.
  855. >”We are just where we need to be, Loyalty.”
  856. Ok whatever you say Zecora
  857. >”Were you expecting to do battle against an immortal dragon at the dying moments of time?”
  858. Ehh, hopefully
  859. >”Despite your reasons for thinking so, a foal is not the end of the world.”
  860. >Before she says anything else, you turn your attention to the large cottage
  861. >Looks kind of like Anon’s, but it is much bigger.
  862. >Twice as wide with an extra floor on top, even a balcony like Twilight’s tree house library had.
  863. Well, looks like Anon is doing well for himself
  864. >”Yes, the magicless one has accomplished much here, though not in the way you would think.”
  865. >Luna walks ahead and through the closed door of the house
  866. >Right, ‘dream logic’
  867. >You follow right behind her to see Rarity talking to Anon
  868. >”Darling I know this time can be a hoo-, no a HANDful, however it is a part in every filly’s life.”
  869. >”Ugh, Jesus, I know Rares, human girls go through the same kind of thing, but I doubt there are any human girls her age that could shatter my leg in an angry huff.”
  870. >”I didn’t know you were so frail, dear. I suppose I’ll have to be a bit more careful around you.”
  871. >”Applejack has her bucking now, thanks to a dash of human physiology the kid is already stronger than Mac.
  872. >Your eyebrows raise to this, not only that Applejack had her child, but that humanity could be a benefit.
  873. >Could your foal be a better flier than you.
  874. >As you are thinking the conversation continues on
  875. >”Oh my, and to think that we were all worried if she would be strong enough to stand properly.”
  876. >”Heh, those were stressful times. No idea of she would be more me or Applejack.”
  877. >Rarity begins to giggle
  878. >”How scared the girls were when she couldn’t stand on her own after birth.”
  879. >The foal couldn’t even stand after birth
  880. >Now she is supposedly stronger that Big Mac
  881. >Anon laughs hard, at the memory you assume.
  882. >”I thought I told Twilight that humans take a few months before they take their first steps”
  883. >”Howdy Rares, Anon.”
  884. >Applejack walks in the room from the door behind you, and through you.
  885. >’Dream logic’
  886. >”Ya’ll ain’t gonna believe what I jus saw, while I was out with little Apple Charlotte.”
  887. >”What’s that AJ?”
  888. >”Rainbow Dash is back visiting.”
  889. >”Darling, that is wonderful news! I simply must tell Fluttershy, I know she misses her dearly.”
  890. >Rarity then hops off the couch to leave
  891. >But not before smiling and giving Anon a kiss on the cheek
  892. >”Until next time, dear.”
  893. >”Well AJ, let’s not keep the Wonderbolt waiting.”
  894. >”Right behind ya, ‘Non.”
  895. >Your friends then follow Rarity out the door
  896. >Walking through you again
  897. Well that was weird, and kinda boring.
  898. >”Not as much as you would think, Loyalty.”
  899. >”And though it lacks the punch of a battle with an elder dragon, we would’ve hoped that you learned a bit here.”
  900. >You did
  901. >Whatever the foal turned out looking like, it was healthy.
  902. >Strong
  903. >Applejack didn’t look much different
  904. >She seemed happy
  905. Whatever, let’s go see future me.
  906.  
  907. --
  908.  
  909. >You take one step outside the home and you’re in a very crowded town square
  910. >Also Rarity is arriving with Fluttershy, despite only leaving to get her a few moments prior
  911. >Anon is also entering the town square with AJ
  912. >You immediately notice two things
  913. >One, Applejack is looking way too excited to see you
  914. >And two, ponies aren’t cowering before Anon as usual.
  915. Hey Luna, the ponies aren’t scared of Anon anymore, what’s up with that?
  916. >”Is it not obvious, Loyalty?”
  917. >”The Magicless One, has his comings and goings in the town proper far more than he used to.”
  918. >”He has had to be both stern and pleading with the shop keeps while providing his mare through her late pregnancy.”
  919. >”He has had to recruit help from the populace for help extending his home to accommodate a mare and a foal that could potentially grow to his size.”
  920. >”He has had to speak to the schoolmarm about accommodations for a foal that could be any shape or size.”
  921. >”He has had to speak to the upperclass about loans to support the farm, while Honesty was infirm.”
  922. >”He has had to speak to the bureaucracy to finalize bonding himself to his new family.”
  923. >”He had to become a part of the community.”
  924. >”And in each interaction, as he did many things he hated in the name of his love and family, he wasn’t seen as a hungry predator, nor a speaking beast, but a stallion who merely cared about his mare and foal.”
  925. Wow, that’s deep Luna.
  926. >”This is no prose, Loyalty, merely a statement of fact.”
  927.  
  928. >”However, we are not here for the Magicless One’s benefit, but your own.”
  929. >You turn and see the dream resume, from where it paused while Luna spoke.
  930. >’Dream logic’
  931. >Just outside the ring of ponies, Applejack reared up on her hind legs and shouted over the crowd.
  932. >”Ah wonder if Rainbow has forgotten the little ponies in her new high falootin position!”
  933. >”Applejack?”
  934. >It was weird hearing your voice without speaking yourself.
  935. Is that how I sound to ponies?
  936. >Just then you see a slightly older you flying above the crowd, sporting the Wonderbolts uniform, and protective eyegoggles.
  937. >You looked awesome.
  938. >Not as awesome as the start of the dream, but still awesome
  939.  
  940. >”APPLEJACK!”
  941. >Your double tackles the mare in a hug.
  942. >”Applejack it’s been too long!”
  943. >”Quite a few years, far as I reckon.”
  944. >Years.
  945. >You’ve been away from your best friend for years.
  946. >The Wonderbolts allow for one month of leave a year, why wouldn’t you spend that time with your friends?
  947. >”DASHIE!!”
  948. >Just then your future self is hit by a pink blur
  949. >Turn a few feet to see Pinkie giving you a crushing hug, and telling you in her hyper fast language how happy she is to see you.
  950. >Her
  951. >Dash2
  952. >That works
  953. >Bucking dream logic
  954.  
  955. >Anon simply waves at Dash2, asking her how she’s been
  956. >Pretty boring now
  957. So what was the point of all this Luna?
  958. From what I can see things turned out alright
  959. >Rarity arrives on the scene with Fluttershy
  960. >For some reason everything has turned tense
  961. >Really tense
  962. >”Rainbow, darling I am so happy to see you.”
  963. >”We simply MUST swap stories about your time away.”
  964. >You sigh knowing exactly where this is going until a certain voice catches your ear.
  965. >”Hello, Rainbow Dash.”
  966. >What.
  967. >That sounded like Fluttershy
  968. >But nothing like Fluttershy
  969.  
  970. >”Hello, Fluttershy.”
  971. >”How are the Wonderbolts, Rainbow Dash?”
  972. >”They’re awesome, Fluttershy.”
  973. >This isn’t cool.
  974. >This isn’t cool at all.
  975. >You’re talking to your first friend in the world the same way you would Trixie, or Lightning Dust.
  976. >And now that you see her you see something you haven’t seen on her before
  977. >A scowl
  978. >A deep one
  979. >”That’s good.”
  980. >She then turns to Rarity, small grimace still apparent.
  981. >”There, we have talked, we are fine, I’ll see you at the spa.”
  982. >”Fluttershy dear, it has been years, you can’t still be so ups-.”
  983. >Fluttershy cut her off with a glare.
  984. >”She was a foal Rarity, I will see you at the spa.”
  985.  
  986. >As you watched the literally kindest pony in the world flutter away coldly, you didn’t notice the incredibly stupid think you were about to do.
  987. >Other you
  988. >Dash2
  989. >”IT wasn’t a foal, Fluttershy.”
  990. >The world stops, not dream logic pause the world stops, just stops.
  991. >It began again when Fluttershy turned around
  992. >Looking furious.
  993. >”SHE was your daughter, Rainbow Dash.”
  994. >Fluttershy, FLUTTERSHY growled out.
  995. >”IT was a mistake that I avoided, Fluttershy.”
  996. >Dash2 replied flying up to Fluttershy
  997. >”SHE was a girl that you KILLED, RAINBOW DASH!”
  998. >Fluttershy, fired back getting into Dash2’s face
  999. >They are then separated from each other in a familiar purple aura
  1000. >”Girls, please. It has been, over ten years; can’t we just forgive and forget?”
  1001. >Thank you based Twilight
  1002. >Best unicorn princess ever
  1003.  
  1004. >Fluttershy and Dash2 were both lowered to the ground a good distance away from one another.
  1005. >Both were ruffling their feathers
  1006. >Both were ready to fight
  1007. >Then they looked at the ponies around them
  1008. >All the ponies that were cheering Dash2 before are just trying desperately to not look at her, or sneak away
  1009. >Pinkie was looking at the ground, mane deflated, though not flat.
  1010. >Anonymous was trying to comfort the pink mare, stroking her mane tenderly.
  1011. >Rarity was beating herself up, about how ‘she thought Fluttershy was over it’ and how ‘this was all her fault’
  1012. >Applejack just looked mad.
  1013. >It only took you a second to figure out why
  1014. >Dash2’s mistake, was AJ’s pride and joy
  1015. >Dash2’s thing, was Aj’s filly
  1016. >Where Dash2 held to her dream, Applejack took responsibility
  1017. >”Not even Tirek killed anypony.”
  1018. Ok, Luna I think you made your point.
  1019. >As Fluttershy turned and walked away, you knew what was coming next
  1020. >You knew because, you would never let anypony get the last word on you if you could help it
  1021. >”Not even Fluttershy did anything with her worthless life.”
  1022.  
  1023. >Before anything else was said, Dash2 opened her wings and took for my cloudh-
  1024. >My house is gone
  1025. >Dash2 was just flying to Cloudsdale
  1026. I left Ponyville, I didn’t even try to apologize, and I acted like more of a jerk than Gilda could ever be accused of.
  1027. >”Loyalty it wasn’t you, at least not yet.”
  1028. >Luna’s words fell on deaf ears
  1029. I insult Aj’s kid, I don’t even try to stay and spend time with them, or any of my other friends in Ponyville.
  1030. I didn’t even see how Scoots is doing.
  1031. I didn’t even care about them.
  1032. I got rid of what would’ve been Anonymous’ daughter, and I didn’t even care.
  1033. >”You held fast to your dreams, and through hard work and determination grasped them.”
  1034. Princess I kn-
  1035. >”No Loyalty, you do not, the Magicless One had no quarrel with what you did.”
  1036. >”If anything he was the most understanding, ‘your body your choice’ were his words I believe.”
  1037. >”Kindness as you very well saw, saw your actions as nothing but infanticide.”
  1038. >”She begged you to see it through to term, even saying that she would take care of it herself, so you wouldn’t lose your dream.
  1039. >”You refused, joined the Wonderbolts, entering as Airmare First Class, and dedicated your life to moving up the ranks.”
  1040. >”You lost touch with your friends after a time, gaining new ones in the service.”
  1041. >”You are still you, even after all of that, you were still quite loyal to your friends, however Kindness stopped being your friend after you got off the train from Manehattan.
  1042. >”At least down this particular path of your decision.”
  1043. What do you mean?
  1044. >”Down this path you held your dream above all else, including your loyalties.”
  1045. >”With this knowledge maybe you’ll do things differently.”
  1046. >”Maybe you will carry your foal to term and hoof it off to Fluttershy, and join as a mere Basic Airmare, work harder, and still reach your dreams.
  1047. >All the while keeping your friends.”
  1048. >”Or maybe you’ll take the opposite path.”
  1049. >Behind where Luna stood another portal opened up
  1050. No more Princess, I don’t think I can take it
  1051. >”This shall be brief, Loyalty.”
  1052. >So tiredly, despite your sleeping state, you step through
  1053.  
  1054. --
  1055.  
  1056. >Once again you step through a dream portal
  1057. >Once again you land in front of Anon’s cottage
  1058. >Once again it is bigger than it is in the real world
  1059. >What is different, is how much bigger it is now than it was
  1060. >What was once a humble two story house, is now a mansion
  1061. >Well, as close to a mansion a hoof-made cottage can get.
  1062. >That wasn’t the biggest change however
  1063. >This biggest change was the cloud house right above it
  1064. >Your cloud house
  1065. >It was bigger too
  1066. >A lot bigger
  1067. >And you already had the best cloud house outside of Las Pegasus
  1068. So, what I stayed here and got rich?
  1069. >”In more ways than you think, Loyalty.”
  1070. What? Is this a ‘My wittle foals are all I need to be happy’ thing?
  1071. Because, if it is, I think I’d rather be a total cunt.
  1072. >Luna huffed before approaching the home and walking through the closed door
  1073. >You follow behind her.
  1074.  
  1075. >Rather than Anon’s humble den you are greeted by a spacious foyer
  1076. >Complete with a spiral staircase that led to a large currently open skylight
  1077. >Once again you hear the muffled sounds of Rarity and Anon speaking through the door to the left in a pretty spacious den
  1078. >Once again you are greeted by Anonymous and Rarity mid-conversation
  1079. >”-en we have time for full nights darling. I don’t think I’ll ever get used to your vigor.”
  1080. >”What can I say? I have to make sure you know that I still love you, and that you are still ridiculously sexy.”
  1081. >At the expected kiss you were officially ready to roll your eyes and leave
  1082. >You already knew the story
  1083. >You had the foal
  1084. >Anon kept it
  1085. >He and Rarity got together, for some reason
  1086. >And he may have kept Applejack’s foal too.
  1087. >For some other reason
  1088. >You were about to tell Luna that you’re ready to go, but you were cut off
  1089. >”And what does that make me? Chopped pears?”
  1090. >What?
  1091. >”You are always welcome to join us Applejack, dear.”
  1092. >”I’m fine with reminding you why I call you Applebottom, Aj.
  1093. >Anonymous, Rarity, and Applejack
  1094. >Together
  1095. >This dream has officially become weird.
  1096. >And a little hot
  1097.  
  1098.  
  1099. >”Ah’m not sayin no, but some of us have to be able to move to do our work.”
  1100. >”The cider is barreled Aj, your mornings have become free as of today”, Anon says with a wicked smile on his face
  1101. Um, Princess are we really going to stay for this?
  1102. >”This would be far from our first time experiencing such a dream, Loyalty.”
  1103. >And now you’re suddenly conscious of every wet dream you’ve had since you and Twilight met
  1104. >”However, watching Generosity, Honesty, and the Magicless One mate isn’t why I brought you here.”
  1105. >With those words the home rushes through you and you are in what looks like the back yard
  1106. >What you see is a more than a little surprising and a little shocking
  1107. >More so than the constantly shifting young are the ponies around them
  1108. >Fluttershy is nursing a foal sized one
  1109. >Pinkie is playing with a team of four of them
  1110. >Twilight is sitting before two talking egghead magic stuff with them
  1111. >And another, slightly chubbier, you is in the air trying to coax two small ones from a cloud
  1112. >While two older children hover alongside you on blue and yellow wings respectively
  1113. >In fact whenever the kids have fur their fur color is the same as yours or your friends’ fur
  1114. >But even the idea that Anon rutted you all isn’t the shocking part
  1115. >The shocking part is Princess Luna lovingly tending to the starry tail of a kid that doesn’t change form from having a human top half and pony bottom half
  1116. >”I see”
  1117. >You jump when the Luna beside you speaks, forgetting she was there for a second.
  1118.  
  1119.  
  1120. >She doesn’t take her eyes off the scene as she speaks to you
  1121. >”Down this path, Loyalty, you gave up everything in order to take care of your foal, and like every mare loved your foal dearly.”
  1122. >”With the combined meddling of Generosity and Magicand with the blessing of Mi Amore Cadenza, a herd was formed.”
  1123. >”I joined because of this very scene, myself with a child of my own, learning that a union with the Ma- with Anonymous allows for alicorn breeding.”
  1124. >That’s new
  1125. What does it being Anon’s have to do with anything?
  1126. >”Ask Magic within the waking world if you desire a lesson in alicorn physiology and reproduction, Loyalty. You may need to rise early, as she adheres strictly to her set schedule.
  1127. ‘Nah, I’m sleeping in’, you say waving a hoof dismissively.
  1128. Besides, the real question is why we all agreed to it?
  1129. I mean Anon can rut like nothing else, but that doesn’t explain how or why we’re all married to him.
  1130. >”A herd and a marriage are different bonds, though one may exist within the other"
  1131. >"In fact down this path Anonymous is married to only one of us.”
  1132. >”However, there is far more to this life than love, marriage, and family.”
  1133. >The scene changes again, ground rushing beneath your hooves.
  1134. >You are suddenly in Manehatten
  1135. Luna why are we in Manehatten?
  1136. >”We have not gone so far Loyalty, we are just now entering the limits of Ponyville.”
  1137. >Had this not been a dream you’d be shocked
  1138.  
  1139.  
  1140. >There were towering skyscrapers, busy paved streets, and a multitude of ponies walking around.
  1141. >Some were riding around in self propelled carts, some were staring at a small glowing square, all of them were sporting clothes and technology you’ve never seen before.
  1142. >”Welcome, Loyalty, to the City of Ponyville”
  1143. >You are surrounded by bustling ponies going about their day to day
  1144. >But one thing was oddly similar
  1145. >Every single one of them was holding an eye pod.
  1146. >Just like Anon’s but in different colors.
  1147. >And only some of them were talking to each other.
  1148. >Shopkeeps and customers
  1149. >Few barely acknowledge that other’s existed
  1150. >None of them were smiling at each other
  1151. >None of them were laughing with each other
  1152. None of them are friends
  1153. >”Now you see Loyalty.”
  1154. >”Supporting a herd and the many children resulting from it, each who needed special accommodations, takes a substantial amount of bits.”
  1155. >”Anonymous, Generosity, and Magic combined their talents, but in the name of money rather than survival, acclaim, or magic”
  1156. >”Ponyville is the technological, and economical center of Equestria, and the world.”
  1157.  
  1158. >You turned to look up at Luna
  1159. >”The town where friendship reined, where Laughter ensured everyone had a birthday party”
  1160. >”Where, Generosity and Honesty would happily give away their merchandise when they saw one in need of it.
  1161. >”Where, Kindness would see to the needs of those, without a voice to speak.”
  1162. >”Where, you, Loyalty ensured that those under you were protected from the wild magic of the Everfree.”
  1163. >”And where the very, Princess of Friendship dwelt, is filled with thousands of ponies who couldn’t tell you the name of the one next to them.”
  1164. >When she said your name you just then noticed the sky
  1165. >The clouds were moving on their own
  1166. >They weren’t being maintained by any pegasai
  1167. >It was creepy as all Tartarus.
  1168. >”In the care and needs of your foals, your love, and each other, you have all forgotten about the world around you.”
  1169. >”And worst of all, we cannot help because we are under the same spell.”
  1170. >The scene changes back to where dream Luna was now delicately combing the mane of her daughter, a serene smile on her face, and humming a song that you remember from your own foalhood.
  1171. >”Even with all the dreamscape tells me, and the battles that would be fought without the Elements, I still wonder if it wouldn’t be worth it”
  1172. But-
  1173. >”It is time to awake, Loyalty, and start on your path.”
  1174. >Luna touches your head with a hoof and you launch into the sky
  1175. >The last thing you see is Luna still staring at herself and the child, who looks up and waves her hand at you
  1176.  
  1177.  
  1178. >You yawn and stretch, and look over at the clock.
  1179. 8:17am
  1180. >You get up and use the bathroom then fly back to your bedroom
  1181. No princess is going to stop me from sleeping in.
  1182. >But as your head hits the pillow a wave of nausea hits you
  1183. >Looks like the brat will, though.
  1184.  
  1185.  
  1186. --
  1187.  
  1188. >Night diamonds in the sky
  1189. >You are Rarity, Element of Generosity, Advisor to Princess Twilight Sparkle, Countess in the court of Friendship, and giddiest unicorn in Equestria
  1190. >You cannot believe your luck
  1191. >After months of silent pining and despair over being unable to indulge your affections
  1192. >You must share the good news with Opalescence
  1193. >Scooping up your cat gently in your magical aura as you head for the loo.
  1194. Oh Opal I still cannot believe it, darling Anonymous has finally ‘gone native’ as they say.
  1195. >”Meow.”
  1196. >No doubt she is just as amazed as you are
  1197. The only male in this town that is a true gentlecolt, while still having that aura of danger that lets you know you are dealing with a real stallion.
  1198. To hear he wasn’t attracted to ponies was distressing, to say the least.
  1199. >You finish removing the last of your make up and place your false eyelashes in their proper container
  1200. I knew I saw him looking at my flank more than once, but to hear him admit to his attraction was simply wonderful beyond description!
  1201. >You levitate Opal once again as you head to your bedroom and apply your eye mask
  1202. I know it may be considered a bit, gauche, to move in so soon, however one must strike while the iron is hot so to speak.
  1203. >”Meow”
  1204. >Of course she understands, Opalescence always understands
  1205. I’m not wrecking any homes, both Applejack and Rainbow Dash have made it known that they do not desire a romantic relationship with Anonymous.
  1206. I can’t be blamed if I go for what I always wanted
  1207. >As you delicately settle into bed, and lay Opal into her smaller but equally comfortable bed you can’t help but think of your perfect plan to land your stallion
  1208. >You can’t help but think about his scent as you leaned on him today
  1209. >You can’t help but think of the admirable growth that Pinkie slid down today
  1210. >Lucky filly
  1211. Oh Opal, I can’t help myself. I think I’m going to ‘bump’ into Anonymous while he is with Twilight tomorrow.
  1212. >”Meow”
  1213. Good night to you too Opal
  1214. >Using your magic you turn off your light and settle in for a full night’s sleep

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