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Various /mlp/ shorts
By GlimbrainCreated: 2023-10-19 21:54:46
Updated: 2023-11-29 18:42:21
Expiry: Never
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Short one-or-two-post greens that I wrote up for various threads.
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Encased in [square brackets] are the prompts that inspired them, if any.
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General tags for ctrl + f: /AiE/ /aj/ /dragon/ /ggf/ /golly/ /moon/ /omg/ /QUEEN/ /sun/
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/sun/ - (You) and Celestia - (26/09/23)
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["I want to hug Celestia."]
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["I want to fug Celestia."]
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["I want to mug Celestia."]
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["In what order?"]
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>You (try to) mug Celestia.
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>Her incandescent snowpity essence purifies your soul right then and there.
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>Prostrating yourself before her, you beg forgiveness for your misdeeds.
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>In her boundless compassion, she states everyone has their lowest moments, their darkest days, but as long as you are willing to carry love in your heart, you will always be welcome in Equestria.
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>She asks that you rise, and as you do, you find yourself staring into her gentle magenta eyes.
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>You hug Celestia.
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>Still feeling indebted, you ask if there's anything, anything at all you can do to pay her back for changing your worldview forever.
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>She appoints you as a royal advisor.
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>Years later, as her closest advisor, you two are enjoying a private dinner, reflecting on all the good you've done together.
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>She invites you into her room.
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>You fug Celestia.
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/QUEEN/ - Boopaline - (26/09/23)
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>*Boop*
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>Opaline recoils from your touch, nose scrunched up.
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>"Human! What is the meaning of this assault?! Explain yourself right now or I'll send you to the dungeon!"
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>Oh god, not the dungeon, that's where she stores all her garlic.
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"I-it's called a boop, My Queen. It's…it's how we humans transfer our magic."
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>Her eyes light up at your mention of "magic."
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>"Magic, you say… Very well, Human! You may proceed with this 'boop.'"
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>She leans in, exposing her snout to you, eagerly anticipating more where that came from.
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>*They proceeded to have lots of boops afterwards.*
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/AiE/ - Pocket Spray! - (27/09/23)
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>You're strolling through the streets of the Crystal Empire with the Princess of Love.
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>She's having a conversation with one of the crystal ponies, some dispute about love or something.
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>"Leave the situation to me, my dear subject, or my name isn't Princess Cadence!"
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>You immediately sense something amiss.
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>Shuffling your hands into your pockets, you query her as the crystal pony leaves.
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"Hey Lovebutt, could you repeat that last thing you said?"
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>"'Or my name isn't Princess Cadence?' Why, Anon, is there something wrong?"
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"Actually, it's 'Cadance,' not 'Cadence.'"
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>She briefly gives you a look of confusion, but her eyes soon widen in realisation.
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>She starts sweating profusely.
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>"Well that is—I mean—What I meant to say was—"
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>Quickly pulling your hand out of your pocket you reveal your—
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"POCKET SPRAY!"
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>"AAAAAAH!"
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>Denizens in town can see that strange biped, holding a can of bug spray, chasing the Queen of the Changelings throughout the streets.
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/omg/ - Donkpity - (03/10/23)
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["What are the unique qualities of donkpity compared to the average snowpity?"]
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>You and Octavia are sitting on the couch in her apartment getting shitfaced.
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>You bullshit to her that you're collaborating with the leading experts in Snowpity to produce a comprehensive report on its benefits for mankind.
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>And that you must see it: her Donkpity.
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>Surprisingly, she accepts, and reveals it to you.
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>The sensations are…overpowering, blindingly so.
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>A rustic smell begins to fill your nostrils, and a familiar sense of home washes over you.
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>You can faintly hear a violin being played in the background, the notes feel like they're massaging your eardrums.
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>Opening your eyes, you find yourself on a path following a countryside meadow, a clear night sky cast overhead.
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>You look over to the meadow and, strangely, see a herd of donkeys from your world grazing.
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>One of them looks up to you, nodding to you and giving you a glance of…acceptance?
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>You begin to walk alongside the path as the melody increases in volume.
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>The cool night breeze nips at your skin as you walk, but it's not an unpleasant feeling, more akin to the gentle pecks of a passionate lover.
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>Before long, you succeed in locating the source of the music: her—your ashen-grey angel; illuminated by the moonlight, it's as if the entire world exists only to bear witness to her symphonies.
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>Noticing you, she gestures for you to join her, and it's then that you notice a unmanned piano next to her.
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>Making your way over to the piano and seating yourself, you tentatively test the keys.
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>While you can't claim to have any true proficiency when it comes to this instrument, somehow, the notes come naturally to you as you play.
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>Octavia smiles at you, and you continue to play into the night.
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>As you come to, you're back on the couch in her apartment, and you see Octavia practising her latest composition on her violin.
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>Seeing you wake up, she smiles at you, stopping her session to make her way back to you.
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>Seating herself on the couch once again, she asks you if her "Donkpity" was what you'd hoped.
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>You tell her it that it was even better than you were expecting.
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>As she snuggles up to you and closes her eyes, you two drift into slumber, closer than ever.
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/omg/ - Tea in White Space - (07/10/23)
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[Image of Octavia drinking tea in White Space]
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>You find yourself in an expansive white void.
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>You're not sure how you ended up here; one moment you were walking to the kitchen, and now, you're here, wherever here is.
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>A familiar voice calls out from behind you.
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>Turning around, you see Octavia.
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>You ask her where the both of you are.
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>She tells you that this is White Space: a personal getaway for her for when she needs to escape the worries of everyday life.
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>You question her on how to leave this place.
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>She tells you that you can leave when you're ready.
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>After all, if you wandered in here, you must have some worries of your own.
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>She pats the spot next to her.
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>Sitting down next to Octavia, you ask her what you can even do in this place.
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>With a smile, she offers you a tea cup, it already has some tea in it.
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>Reluctantly, you take a sip, and you notice an immediate calming effect on your nerves.
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>In this state, you feel like you can truly appreciate the tranquillity of this place.
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>No shouting, no loud music, no industrial machinery.
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>All you hear is the faint, steady breathing (and occasional sip of her cup) of the mare next to you.
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>You look at her, she looks back.
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>You smile at her, she smiles back.
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>Maybe White Space isn't so bad after all.
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/sun/ - Like a Swan - (24/10/23)
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>You're bird watching next to a lake adjacent Ponyville.
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>Today's featured bird: swans! A whole flock of them have gathered in the water.
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>You throw out some birdseed that you had prepared, watching it float away in their direction.
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>Gazing at them as they gorge upon your seed, you notice one them looking your way.
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>Compulsively, you find yourself giving a small wave; not that you expect it to respond, anyway.
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>But surprisingly, it swims over to your location, and you soon find yourself face-to-face with this aquatic avian.
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>It is then you notice that this swan is much larger than the rest, and is also wearing a top hat for some reason; but hey, you're not gonna start judging the local wildlife on their fashion choices.
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>The swan gives you a curious gaze through her magenta eyes—you think she's a her, anyway.
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"Aw, aren't you a big girl!"
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>You rub along the side of her neck, and give her a few scritches under the chin.
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>She coos, then whinnies—wait, whinnies?
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>The sound startles you, causing you to flick your hand upwards, taking the poor swan's face off.
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"Oh God! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean—wait—"
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>That's not a face, it's a…mask? The top hat is a part of the ensemble too, it seems.
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>No, that's not a swan, that's…
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"Princess Celestia?"
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>Indeed, that long horn and auroral mane can belong to none other.
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>Just how was she able to fit her long, flowing locks in there…?
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>Upon hearing the utterance of her name, her ears fold down and her pupils shrink to pinpricks.
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>She hurriedly glances around, likely checking for other witnesses, but it's just you, her, and the other swans.
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>Turning her head back to you, the proximate temperature soon rises to a threatening peak as she stares you dead in the eyes.
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>"Nopony must *ever* find out about this, understand?"
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"O-okay."
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>She magically fits the swan mask back on, and the temperature cools down.
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>"…And I didn't say stop."
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>You spend an uncomfortably long amount of time massaging around her neck as she hums in contentment while the other swans look on in abject jealousy.
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>She was very soft. 10/10 would swan watch again.
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/sun/ - The Sun Code - (25/10/23)
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["What’s the cheat code to spawn Celestia?"]
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>You stand in front of the mirror in your bathroom.
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"Wheely Bopper Wheely Bopper Wheely Bopper."
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>You shoot your reflection some finger guns, spin 720 degrees and moonwalk out of the bathroom and into the hallway.
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>Without turning around, you carefully sidestep your way rightwards to your living room.
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>Every sidestep is equidistant, and for every three sidesteps you take to the right, you take one back to the left.
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>Eventually, you judge yourself to be the right distance from your living room; you make a 90 degree turn to face it.
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>After readying yourself, you perform a dive roll, landing yourself into a prone position.
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>You crawl forwards until you reach the end of the room, where a window awaits.
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>From your grounded position, you launch yourself into the air with a Worm manoeuvre, orienting yourself in an upright standing position.
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>Looking out of your window, you stretch your arms upwards into a Y-position, praising the sun; this part isn't necessary for your ritual but you find it funny.
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>Turning towards the centre of the room, you walk forward three steps, arms at the ready.
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>You thrust your left arm up, and then thrust your right arm up.
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>Next, you thrust your left arm down, and then thrust your right arm down.
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>Then, you thrust your left arm left, and then thrust your right arm right.
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>Afterwards, you thrust your right arm left, and then thrust your left arm right.
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>Following that, you pinch your right nipple, and then you pinch your left nipple.
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>Finally, you end with a pelvic thrust.
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>A near-blinding flash occurs as a bathtub materialises itself in the middle of your living room.
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>And in that bathtub—is Princess Celestia; she's humming while combing herself with a brush.
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>"Hmm~ hmm—huh?!"
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>She quickly realises that she's had a change of scenery, and her eyes soon fall upon you.
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>Her expression is one of tired resignation.
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>"…What is it this time?"
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"Can I borrow your crystal remote thing? I lost mine and I wanna watch TV."
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>"I already lent it to you last time, don't you remember?"
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"Uh…"
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>"Did you check under the couch?"
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"Oh, let me see."
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>Making your way over to the couch, you do so, and—hey, there it is!
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>You wave it to her.
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"Ah, here it is. Thanks Celly!"
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>She sighs, and teleports out without another word.
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"…Wait a minute, there's no charge left!"
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>You stand in front of the mirror in your bathroom.
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/dragon/ - Smoldering Affection - (26/10/23)
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>"Hey hot stuff, how about you and me ditch this joint and *really* heat things up, huh?"
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>Sitting on a nearby windowsill, Smolder wiggles her eyebrows at you.
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"This 'joint' is my workplace, Smolder."
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>You walk past her, proceeding down the school hallway, not slowing down for a moment.
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>"Oh, I've got a place for you that needs working over, needs working over *real good.*"
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>Flying up behind you, she rests her claws on your shoulders as you walk; you can feel her breathing on one of your ears, gross.
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>"Come on, big guy, you know you want to *slay* this naughty dragon~"
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"Smolder, I have a class to teach, and *you* have a class to attend, if I'm not mistaken."
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>"Eh, they won't miss me."
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"…I'd hate to have to bring up your truancy to Principal Twilight on account of you skipping valuable friendship lessons."
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>Smolder coughs.
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>"Whoa—hey! Let's not do anything drastic here! We're both adults here, aren't we?"
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"Only one of us is an adult here."
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>"I can be an adult in all of the *right* ways, Nonny."
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"My name is Anonymous."
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>"Come on, we don't have to be so formal with each other, we live under the same roof, after all."
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"*You* live here. I've got my own house, Smolder."
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>"Call me Smol, big guy."
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"I'd rather not."
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>"Aw, don't be like that. You put up a cold front, but I know you're hiding a heart of gold in there, and we dragons *love* gold."
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>Leaning into you, she repositions her claws from your shoulders to around your upper torso
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>As she slowly begins to caress your chest, she lowers her tone to a sensual whisper.
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>"I mean…maybe we can work something out? I'd be willing to do *anything* for your silence, big guy…"
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"Really, anything?"
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>"Mmm, yeah. Interested now, Nonny?"
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"I want you…"
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>Her breath hitches.
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>"Y-yeah?"
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"To attend Fluttershy's class."
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>She groans.
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>"Ugh, that butterball? I'm a dragon! I don't need to learn about how to feed birds or brush rabbit fur!"
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"Well, if attending Twilight's office is more your speed…"
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>"No! No—that's fine! I'll go, alright! Geez…"
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>Detaching herself from your body, she flies off. Finally, some peace and quiet.
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>Spike, your teaching assistant who was walking with you all throughout this conversation, speaks up.
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>"Yikes. You think Smolder would get the hint, huh?
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>"I mean, you two are completely different species! And that age gap too, am I right?"
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>You roll your eyes.
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/golly/ - Once a Golly… - (11/11/23)
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>"I don't understand, you've been reformed for years! You're happily married! Why are you doing this?!"
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>At the end of a long and bloody coup, Twilight Sparkle, Ruler of Equestria, lies defeated and powerless on the castle floor.
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>She casts a betrayed look towards Cozy Glow—once a filly, now a full-grown mare.
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>Yet still irredeemably evil.
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>All except in the eyes of one—her beloved.
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>That's you, by the way, standing right next to her.
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>Cozy wields a Staff of Dunking Specifically on Purple Pony Princesses.
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>"Gee, Twilight, I do appreciate my lovely Anon and all…"
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>She nuzzles into your side, before turning to Twilight with a smirk.
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>"But I don't know why you thought I'd suddenly start caring about other ponies after that."
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>"Because that's how we ponies are! We love and respect one another!"
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>Cozy takes a mocking tone.
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>"News flash, I'm not like the other ponies. And you *still* haven't realised that? That's okay, you'll have plenty of time to reflect on your mistakes later."
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>"You mean…after all these years, you were just faking it? But why? Why now?!"
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>"Typical Twilight, never able to see the bigger picture."
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>Cozy flies up close to Twilight.
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>"All of your friends are gone. The other princesses? Gone too. It's just you left, now."
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>"Even though we may be apart, Equestria is stronger than ever!"
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>Twiight struggles to a standing position, determination building on her face.
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>"You may have won today, Cozy, but somecreature will see you for who you truly are and stop you. The Magic of Friendship lives on in each and every—"
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>Cozy bonks Twilight on the horn with the staff, causing her to drop down, wincing.
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>"Oh, right, you and your incredibly diverse Equestria, of course. Pfft.
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>"Puh-lease, Equestria is easier than ever to turn against itself. I didn't even have to try compared to the Coronation.
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>"Face it, Princess. This is where your 'friendship' has lead you. Your journey is over."
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>She hovers over Twilight, forelegs outstretched.
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>"But me? My journey's just getting started."
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>She turns and leaves, slowing down to brush past you.
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>"Come on, Nonny. We have an empire to build."
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>Taking one last look at Twilight, you turn and follow Cozy.
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>You're conflicted.
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>On one hand, you've got a cute, evil Gollywife.
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>But on the other hand, you might have helped kickstart the founding of G5's Equestria.
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[Note: An Anon continued this at https://desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/40351520/#40525938 ]
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/ggf/ - Griffon Lifeguard - (16/11/23)
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["Imagine falling overboard in the ocean and your griffon gf immediately dives in to rescue you from drowning"]
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>You're on a cruise ship with your bro, Rainbow Dash.
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>The Wonderbolts are performing a show over the ocean, and Dash got you a front-row ticket to the action.
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>Shit's not just cash, it's cash-money.
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>Dash is flying with them in the skies high above—she's the star member, after all.
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>After executing a set of coordinated spins and turns with the squad, she splits off from the formation and starts descending—fast.
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>Oh hell yeah, she's gonna do it.
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>Your dumb ass heads to the edge of the ship deck, leaning against the railing.
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"Fuck yeah, Dash! Show that sound barrier who's boss!"
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>Just before she hits the water, she makes a sharp turn upwards, breaking the sound barrier and performing her signature Sonic Rainboom; a symphonic shock wave of colour overtakes your senses.
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>The shock wave sends an ocean wave colliding against the ship, rocking it back and forth.
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>It's not much of a problem for most of the passengers.
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>But you? You feel like you're on air right now, and that's because…you are.
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>Wait, what?
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>In the midst of the excitement you find yourself with nothing to stand on and no railing to grab onto.
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>Out of the corner of your eye you see that same railing you were once holding onto, but it's now moving farther and farther away.
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>The realisation finally hits you: you've fallen off the deck, and now—
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>You plunge into the cold water, sinking straight to the dark depths.
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>"Anon! Hold on! I—"
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>Dash flies up to the water surface and stops.
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>Panic starts to set in on her face as she looks at her wings, and then at you descending deeper and deeper.
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>"GET BACK, DWEEB!"
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>Dash is pushed to the side by…something else descending into the water—a bird of some kind?
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>The bird catches up with you quickly, wrapping its talons around your body; its feathered form provides a comforting warmth to contrast the abyssal chill.
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>And then, you ascend.
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>Out of the freezing ocean, and back into the comfortable open air.
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>Within a few moments, your saviour lays you down on the floor of the ship deck.
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>You cough and gasp for air as your body enjoys breathing oxygen once more.
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>Laying on your back, you see a pair of amber eyes gazing down at you.
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>"You good?" you hear a feminine, raspy voice say.
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"Y-yeah."
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>"Good."
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>Steadying yourself back to your feet, you get a better look at your hero.
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>While the front of her is bird-like, with white plumage and a set of yellow talons, the other half of her is lion-like in appearance, with brown fur and brown wings.
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"Thanks."
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>"Be more careful next time, dweeb."
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>She gives you a light spank on the behind with a wing.
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>"A nice ass like that is wasted on the ocean floor."
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>She takes off into the sky, and Rainbow Dash trots up to you.
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>"Anon!"
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"Hey Dash, sorry about the scare."
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>"I know I'm awesome, but try to tone it down for the next time, will ya?"
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>Rubbing the back of your head, you look upwards, tracing the bird-lion's flight path with your eyes.
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"Who…who was that?"
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>"That's Gilda. She's working as a lifeguard here."
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>You see Gilda perch on the top of the ship mast; that's a hell of a lifeguard seat.
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>"Oh, and she's also a griffon. First time seeing one, right?"
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"It is."
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>Damn, Gilda, huh?
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>Dash prods your side with a hoof.
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>"Hey, I was totally gonna save you, y'know. Just didn't wanna steal the whole show, 'cause I'm already a lead Wonderbolt and all."
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>You give her a few reassuring pats on the withers.
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"Yeah, yeah, Dash. It's all good."
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>Satisfied with your answer, she turns and flies off to join the rest of her squad, ready to continue the show.
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>Your eyes drift to the top of the ship—towards Gilda.
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>She's still up there, surveying the area, ready to leap into action should the need arise.
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>She turns her head to you, noticing your stare.
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>And gives you a wink.
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>Whew.
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/moon/ - Moon Up - (21/11/23)
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"Can you make it bigger?"
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>"Bigger?"
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"Yeah, the Moon, can you make it bigger?"
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>"I…we can change the phase, if that's what you would like."
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>You and Princess Luna are sitting in a open grassy field, gazing up at the night sky.
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>Luna's horn lights up, manipulating not the Moon—but the unseen Sun.
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>The manipulation of the Sun's light causes the Moon to shift phases—from waxing, to full, to waning, to new, then back to waxing again.
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>"How about that?" She beams proudly.
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>That's kind of freaky that she can do that with just magic, freakier still that it's the Sun that moves in this world, but that's not what you're here for.
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"That *is* impressive, but I meant like—the size, the actual size of the Moon."
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>She frowns.
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>"We are sad to say that that is beyond the scope of our talents. We can only move the Moon, not modify it."
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"But what if you brought it closer to Equestria so it would seem bigger?"
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>"I…do not think that is a good idea, Anonymous. Sister warned me of the dangers that the celestial bodies can pose when they drift too close to Equestria. The Sun, for example, is capable of eradicating all life with its unrelenting heat if it is left unchecked."
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"Yeah, but that's because the Sun is a giant ball of fire. The Moon, on the other hand, is completely harmless—a kind, stone goliath that watches over the night."
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>"When you put it like that…yes, I can see why the Moon isn't one to be feared—at any distance, even."
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>She gives you a pensive look.
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>"But still…I'm not sure about this, I can't imagine my sister will be pleased if she hears that I've been tampering with the Moon in such an unorthodox way."
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"That's exactly why you should do it. It'll be the sisterly prank to end all sisterly pranks."
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>"…Do you really think so?"
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"I know so. In fact, I have the utmost confidence that this will be…"
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>You lean in close.
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"The *ultimate* prank."
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>"Hmm…"
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>She rests her chin on her forehoof, deep in thought.
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>Her eyes soon light up with mischievous conviction as she turns to you.
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>"Very well, Anonymous, you have convinced me! I shall pull the Moon in to make it seem bigger."
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>She giggles to herself.
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>"And to see the look on my sister's face when my Moon dwarfs her Sun!"
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>Luna adopts a pointed stance towards the Moon and closes her eyes in concentration.
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>Her horn begins to glow.
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>And slowly, but surely, the Moon inches ever closer.
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>You can hear the faint sound of rushing water in the distance; a high tide is building.
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>As the moon closes in, so does the impending sense of dread.
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>Curiously, Luna herself seems to be growing in size as the Moon draws near.
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>Exponentially so, even.
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>Maybe this wasn't the best idea for a prank.
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>Hm.
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>You hear Luna shouting out to you from high above.
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>"We are making the Moon bigger, Anonymous! WE ARE MAKING THE MOON BIG—"
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>The end times have come.
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/AiE/ - GG no re - (24/11/23)
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["It wasn’t my fault princess! It was Anon’s it was all his idea. Hes the one responsible for everything so punish him. Hes clearly much more trouble than hes worth. Why take it out on me your faithful student or your subjects? Make anon suffer for his transgressions princess we all know he deserves it!"]
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>Purplesmart just threw you under the bus in front of Celestia.
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>What a cunt, you didn't do anything to deserve this.
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>Slipping laxatives into her coffee is high-brow humour and you're not going to hear a single word otherwise.
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>Twilight is grovelling at Celestia's hooves, eager to ship you off to the fucking Sun or whatever morbid fate she has planned for you.
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>Celestia gives the both of you a judging look.
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>Maybe petrification?
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>She speaks with a commanding tone.
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>"Very well, I think I know what to do with Anonymous."
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>"Excellent! Whatever you choose, I'm sure it'll be the right decision! B-but if you want my opinion, Anonymous deserves only the harshest punishments you can give. H-he's pure evil! Not even the Elements work on him!"
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>Fuck off, Spergle; ain't nobody got time for that rainbow bullshit.
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>"Anonymous, come here." Celestia beckons you with a wing.
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>Welp, it's time.
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>You walk over to her and close your eyes; your punishment will hurt less if you can't see it, right?
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>"Anonymous…" She wraps a wing around you.
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>"As punishment for your crimes…" Here it comes.
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>"I hereby sentence you…" It was a good run, Anon. It was a good run.
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>"To live with me at my castle." And there it is—
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"Wait, what?"
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>"WHAT?!" an autistic voice cries out.
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>"I can see I made a grave mistake in sending you here, Anonymous. I had hoped your…unique perspective would help Twilight in her friendship studies. But clearly, she hasn't taken your wisdom to heart."
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>"T-that was a test? No! Wait, Celestia! Give me another chance I'll—"
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>"So, effective immediately, you're coming back to Canterlot, with me. I could certainly do with having someone like you around to help stave off the dreadful monotony of the day courts."
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>Celestia nuzzles your cheek and you hear a loud thud behind you.
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>She crouches down in front of you, extending a wing.
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>After holding this position for a few seconds, she questions you.
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>"Well, what are you waiting for?"
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"You don't mean—"
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>"Of course I do. Mount me, Anonymous, I'll fly you to Canterlot personally."
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>You situate yourself onto her back, ready to take off.
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>But before you do, you look back to Twilight one last time.
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>She's sprawled out on the floor, twitching and frothing at the mouth.
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>Damn.
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>GG, Sparkle, no re.
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/aj/ - Apples - (26/11/23)
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[">Need to start a converstation"]
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["Um... apples?"]
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>The most beautiful mare you've ever seen sits on the other side of the bench.
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>Her gamboge coat; her olive mane done up in a lovely ponytail, tied off with a red ribbon; her serene, verdant eyes; her stylish stetson hat; her cute country accent.
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>Everything about her is just perfect; there's just one problem.
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>You don't know what to say to her; you don't know how to break the ice!
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>The two of you occasionally steal glances from each other.
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>You have to say something; if you let this chance slip, you may never get another one.
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>Steeling your nerves, you take a deep breath and speak.
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"Apples?"
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>She turns her head to you, raising an eyebrow.
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>"…Apples?"
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>You nod.
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"Apples."
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>"Apples…"
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>She closes her eyes, deep in thought.
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>After a few moments, she opens them, and nods at you with a smile.
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>"Apples."
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"Apples!"
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>Her eyes shoot open.
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>"A-apples?!"
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>A bead of sweat drips down your forehead, did you go too far?
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>Before any more invasive thoughts can enter your mind, Applejack gives you a playful nudge, having scooted a lot closer to you on the bench.
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>"Apples? Apples."
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>You two laugh.
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>The two of you chat for a bit longer; the ice has successfully been broken.
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>Soon though, Applejack hops off the bench, and walks a few steps.
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>She looks back at you.
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>"Apples…?"
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"Apples."
by Glimbrain
by Glimbrain
by Glimbrain
by Glimbrain
by Glimbrain