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FoE: A Dry Heat

By shAnon
Created: 2024-06-25 01:06:42
Updated: 2024-06-25 07:43:54
Expiry: Never

  1. (for context the outline and main points of this came to me in a dream so i had to write it into a story)
  2. (enjoy?)
  3. >was a hot day in the wasteland
  4. >remarkably hot even for this part of equestria
  5. >despite the ever-present cloud layer, it was still hot
  6. >that kind of dry heat that made you want to go without barding, even if no armor was more of a health risk than anything the heat could do to you
  7. >full saddle bags didnt help the sweltering heat either
  8. >or the half'a armory of clapped out scrap guns i was carrying from our last fight
  9. >the jingle of caps i heard from one of my partner's bags was reassuring though
  10. >and the cash we would make off the guns and chems we snagged would make suffering through this heat more than worth it
  11. >i could feel the sweat pooling under my combat barding
  12. >it made every hoof fall heavier than it had to be
  13. >"feeling the heat, eh Slick?" drawled the colt trotting beside me
  14. "eeeeeyup. but its a dry heat, pardner...."
  15. >i said with a slow drawl and a smirk, looking out the corner of my eye down to my companion
  16. >he laughed at my look and trotted a lazy circle around me before returning to his original position at my side
  17. >it wasnt far to the caravan hub from here, straight shot down the trail
  18. "just past the end of the canyon"
  19. >i accidently said out loud
  20. >"eeeeeeeeeyup.' he said without turning to me but i knew he had a wicked smile on his muzzle just by the tone
  21. >the tall shadow of the canyon's mouth came into sharper view as we approached, all wavy and warped by the heat
  22. >a yellow blip came into range on my E.F.S before i knew it
  23. >not a second later an equine form exited that shadow melting into the warped silver waves of the mirage, and they were walking down the trail to us
  24. >"you see em too?"
  25. "eyup."
  26. >i felt the muscles in my back tense up
  27. "maybe theyre just a scavver?"
  28. >"scavvers dont usually soak their cloaks in blood, right?" ,he said with a smug look while lowering his binoculars down in their holster
  29. "yea thats what i was afraid of..."
  30. >i say with a sigh
  31. "but remember young colt, always start with a big smile!"
  32. >i add with the biggest, most faux, used carriage salesstalion smile i could muster
  33. >he rolled his eyes in response, looking again through the binos around his neck
  34. >"they got a spear, looks like." colt says as he holsters the binocular rig and trots back to my pace
  35. >i pop half a mintal and we continue at the same trot down the trail to meet our new friend
  36. >getting closer now i can tell by a glance at their frame theyre a mare
  37. >gaunt and thin like your typical raiderpony
  38. >the cloak is a little wide at the top though
  39. >they wearing a hat under that cloak?
  40. >closer to meeting in the middle of the trail now
  41. >pop another half a mintal, slick back my thinning mane with a hoof, straighten my hat back on my head and clear my throat
  42. "WEEEELLLLLLL HOWDY-DO THERE mis..."
  43. >as i started my opener the mare threw her hood back to reveal two heads with necks both starting at the shoulders
  44. >i heard colt gasp at the revelation
  45. >the raider's coat and mane were maybe blue below all the dried blood and other foulness whos origin i did not want to know in this lifetime
  46. "ahem ....uhh Missus?"
  47. >"BOOMWORK!" yells the head on the right with unblinking wild eyes and a manic chipped grin to match,
  48. >"and shortwork..." the other says almost too quiet to hear with her mane covering her eyes and most of her muzzle, i can see her trying to keep a straight face, like shes trying her hardest not to laugh
  49. "ah yes well, worksisters? may i as-"
  50. >"WHAt the hell are yall doing with all them guns there huh where yall get em at huh gimme a straight answer right damn now alright" the right sister says in a breathless run on sentence while squinting one eye at me and jabbing her head out as if it were a pointed hoof in an interrogation
  51. >"....and what bout them fat saddle bags too eheh." the left says, looking away from us, stifling a giggle now with noticeably less composure
  52. >how could she even see us though that mane?
  53. "well to answer your inquiry we are simple camp-to-camp scavvers looking for salvage, my fair fill- er.. fillies.'
  54. >i say puffing out my chest with the used carriage salesstallion smile dialed to 11
  55. "we just left the near by mining camp there,"
  56. >with the flick of a forehoof i gesture far off to the raider camp that we just wiped out the day before, more than likely the sisters' destination
  57. "and they were mighty gracious hosts too! allowed us to trade our ample stores of ammunition for their quality salvage, some of the best ive ever laid eyes on i tell ya what!"
  58. >i boast while giving the shabby firearms in the bundle on my back a rattle
  59. >tip the hat up
  60. >and flash The Smile to top it off
  61. >the right sister still holds that same inquisitive squint at me, slowly bringing her head back next to her sister's
  62. >"oooookay then mister scavverpony....." she patently says turning to the other mare
  63. >nudging the left one they both make eye contact with me and turn their heads to their back in unison
  64. >overly loud whispers and giggles are issued back and fourth from behind the left ones overgrown mane
  65. >this goes on for a few seconds
  66. >i perk my ears up to hear words like "later" and "cute" and "slice" mixed with silent laughing
  67. >fininshed with their deliberation they turn back to colt and i
  68. >...we decided to"
  69. >"KEEP TROTTING!!!!!!"
  70. >they say together and without skipping a beat to canter right between us through the middle of the trail making a beeline for the raider camp
  71. >i take my pocket watch from one of my barding's pockets
  72. >just past noon
  73. >colt lets his overloaded saddlebags drop to the dirt
  74. >"shock and awe?" he asks with a full body stretch like a cat
  75. >i nod to him as i make my own preparations
  76. >free of my burden as well i give my neck a crack and think of how nice that visit to the caravan bathhouse is going to be later tonight
  77. >"come on studley we dont have all day for you to soak up the heat with your eyes closed." colt snaps, positioning himself broadside to the quickly departing mare
  78. >with a groan i take the missile launcher from its holder in my battlesaddle
  79. >and i lean down to ask with a smirk as wicked as i imagined his was earlier
  80. "moments like this pardner, make me extra glad i saved ya, you ready?"
  81. >"just get it over with, horseapple." he mutters as he stuffs cotton in his ears
  82. >with the weapon shouldered i sit down on my haunches lying the massive tube of a weapon across colt's back
  83. >hunkering down into a comfortable firing position i bring my S.A.T.S up
  84. >it flickers a few times in my eyes before starting up proper
  85. >looking down range through the scope shes maybe a hundred yards out
  86. >targeting her in S.A.T.S it gives me the probability of a torso shot at 50%
  87. >then it shows 100%
  88. >and then it flickers back to 50
  89. >the hit chance keeps going back and forth
  90. >i try to time it when it flickers to 100
  91. >3....
  92. >2....
  93. >1........
  94. >FOOM!
  95. >WOOSH!
  96. >the missile wizzes through the air towards its target
  97. >and goes right above the mares heads
  98. >BOOM!
  99. >into the hill in front of them
  100. >i see them both shoot their heads right in our direction
  101. >fuck...
  102. >"told you we should have had that steel ranger techie look at your pipbuck when we had the chance last week." he says taking the small tufts of cotton from his ears giving them each a reflexive flick
  103. "yea yea i know i know"
  104. >i say putting the launcher on top of the gun bundle
  105. >"you thought about how much we're gonna get for all those guns?"
  106. "dont worry, should get plenty for the ones that arent falling apart, the rest we sell as parts like i said last night."
  107. >i say with a dismissive wave of my hoof as i go digging through my saddlebags
  108. >there you are
  109. >first aid kit
  110. >popping open the seal i am met with the fruity clinical scents ive come to love
  111. >"i dont know, those things would be better used as clubs i think. you could even try to trade them as that. rare raider skull bashers!" he says as he shakes his hooves in mock fright
  112. >i find my prize amongst the potions and gauze
  113. >dash my beloved, you go so wonderfully with your best friend buck
  114. "hush up about money colt, you know you got more than enough in that bag of yours to treat that bar filly in town real nice for a night or two"
  115. >at that i see the burgundy coat on his muzzle go a whole new shade of red
  116. "heh acting like i dont have eyeballs, foalish little colt you are."
  117. >i stand up and stretch
  118. >groan as i straighten up to my full height
  119. >chew on two tabs of buck
  120. >take my hit of dash
  121. "feelin slick as slime half the time ready to wine and dine honey LETS GET IT GOING COME ON!!!!"
  122. >"what the hay does that even mean?"
  123. >im off without an answer because i dont know either
  124. >the wind in my mane im off, i have become one with the air in my lungs
  125. >head down and all hooves beating the ground like its my last day alive
  126. >moving fast like the missile from my launcher
  127. >except ill be meeting my target
  128. >bringing my head up to see through the dust and im there
  129. >BANG!
  130. >my body is a rocket fueled by dash and i hit my bull's-eye
  131. >the sisters are still tumbling when i bring my head up to see what became of them
  132. >rising like a phoenix from the dust of my crash landing i spring to my hooves
  133. >on them again i see they lost their spear and cloak in the collision
  134. >i expected laughter on the left ones face but only fear was home
  135. >the right one was the one smiling
  136. >her side lunged for me
  137. >a hoof coming for my face
  138. >with its lift off being driven by one hind leg it didnt have much power behind it
  139. >shoulda had your sister on the same boat when you left dock for murdertown, little filly
  140. >i take the shot to the eye but i come down on them with a double hammer forehoof blow from on high
  141. >like the moon princess shooting down for revenge my hooves come down in one strike on righties muzzle
  142. >she was smiling when her wild eyes met mine in my swing
  143. >i hear bone and enamel shatter beneath my blow
  144. >"NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!" leftie screams in the most inequine wail imaginable
  145. >ive heard some good ones in my day but that takes the cake
  146. >righty and the appendages she has control over are limp
  147. >ah i know how to wake her up real fast
  148. >the other one is screaming about how im a murderer and a killer and blah blah blah blah
  149. >she keeps trying to get up with half her whole body as dead weight
  150. >will raiders never learn
  151. >i straddle them to pull their writhing wailing form into my forelegs like a hug from behind
  152. >then i stand up on my hind legs
  153. >moving my grip up higher to the base of their necks i drop their rump onto the ground with both our weights combined
  154. >with a crack and a start i feel the whole mass of mutant mare in my legs come to life
  155. "SO NICE OF YOU TO JOIN US FOR THIS PART HONEY BEAR!!!!"
  156. >now with their whole form awake they both begin to thrash in my iron grip
  157. >they pull and bash weakly at my forelegs wrapped around their breast
  158. "OH THATS NO WAY FOR LITTLE RAIDER FILLIES TO PLAY WITH LITTLE COLTS NOW IS IT!?!?!?!?"
  159. >still screaming and struggling they protest
  160. >rightie spitting blood and teeth at me and leftie telling me how evil i am
  161. >time to end it
  162. >i shimmy the grasp of my forelegs up to righties chin
  163. "THIS HERE LITTLE FILLY IS WHAT YOU GET WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT DOING THOSE THINGS TO MY COLT!!!!!!!!!!!!"
  164. >with my hind legs wrapped and locked around their waist i ratchet my grip around righties neck
  165. >"YOU MONSTER WHY WHY WHY PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS PLEASE LET US GO PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!!!!" screamed the left one but it was too late
  166. >righty sputtered and spat for air for her life but thats not how she would go out
  167. >tightening all my limbs to their fullest now i arched my back in the opposite direction of her backbone
  168. >pulling with all my dash and buck fueled rage i pulled untill i heard it
  169. >the pop
  170. >and with that the side righty controlled went limp one last time
  171. >their body went half slack but leftie was still making all that noise
  172. >"HOW COULD YOU HAVE KILLED HER YOU ANIMAL YOU ARENT EVEN A PONY YOURE A MONSTER HOW COULD YOU TAKEHERFROMME!!!!!!!!"
  173. >she was beating at my legs with her free forehoof and still trying to get her footing to escape
  174. "YOU DONT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT BEING AWAY FROM HER MUCH LONGER LITTLE RAIDER FILLY!!!!!!!"
  175. >and with that i loosened one foreleg from her sisters ragdoll neck to retrieve my combat knife
  176. >"WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO NOW NONONONONONONO I DONT WANT TO DIE PLEASE!!!!!!!"
  177. "ALL THE PONIES YOU KNEW ARE DEAD AHAHAHAHA!!!!!!"
  178. >knife now firmly in my mouth i began to saw
  179. >i lifted her muzzle up and started my way through righties neck just at the base of her head
  180. >as i got to the spine bit i had to saw with a little more effort
  181. >and with another pop the head was off and i heard her sister go quiet
  182. >in an instant the severed head rolled out of my bloody grip along with righties neck
  183. >i pushed their dead weight away from me and i rolled on my back to look at the cloud layer high above
  184. >"wow slick did you really have to do em like that?"
  185. >i guess colt walked over to see the aftermath
  186. >maybe to see if i needed healing
  187. "they had it coming to em. you know!"
  188. >i jabbed a forehoof up at him
  189. "you. know."
  190. >and then i realized the blood
  191. >it was black and thick
  192. >like it wasnt blood
  193. >i had a good amount on my forehooves so i rolled over and i pawed some at the dirt below me
  194. >it was like a smear of paint when i moved the tip of my hoof along the ground and drew a line
  195. >weird
  196. >"woah look at what you did to her face."
  197. >looking over i saw what he meant
  198. >lefties face was pure horror, eyes wide and mouth agape
  199. >frozen as a mask of shock half hidden by her unkempt mane
  200. >and i looked at righties face a few feet away
  201. >her mouth was a bloody mess and her left eye was cocked to the right looking at the other one that stared off into nothing
  202. "they got what they deserved, never forget that colt"
  203. "raiders ain't ponies and they always get what they deserve."

FoE: A Dry Heat

by shAnon