Anonfilly Wants to Know What A Horn's Made Of [4]


                                            >Another day in Equestria

                                            >Be the filly with a question that needs to be answered

                                            >Which you can ask if this lecture ever ends

                                            >"So is it getting through to you now how dangerous that was? Or if I thought Discord gave you as a gift and you were left as a life-sized filly lawn gnome?"

                                            >This speech would probably be more effective if it were coming from someone other than yourself

                                            >The you that's the original, purple found out cloning was hard

                                            >Apparently the other you was worried at some point

                                            >Though some ponies were talking about him yelling at the sun again before actually helping you

                                            "A pony would've reported me to someone, they don't take lewd statues lightly here."

                                            >"And whose fault is that? Especially after the quesadillas?"

                                            >You still hate when not-you is right

                                            >Especially because he thinks exactly like you do

                                            "Point is that you should've let me have the trout, faggot."

                                            >"Not when you act like that, and you know that's not the point. Just- fine, go fuck off until I think of a way to actually get through to you."

                                            >Hah, you won the stall-out of stubbornness

                                            >That means freedom to go bother purple about your forehead protrusion

                                            >Bookhoers knows about being a pony and should have a surface level knowledge on what exactly a horn is made of

                                            >You arrive at the castle after a long run-turned-walk

                                            >Running still sucks, no matter the number of legs

                                            >You knock on the large crystalline door

                                            >It takes a moment before the biggest beta you know opens it

                                            "Ey, Spike! What's up? I'm here to talk to-"

                                            >"Sorry 'Non, Twilight said to tell you that she's not helping you find more poison joke."

                                            >Damn, there goes those future plans

                                            >But that's not what you're here for this time

                                            >You're here to learn something important, something vital

                                            "It's not that, but I do have a question for her. Fate of Equestria may depend on the answer."

                                            >Spike gives you a flat look, like the one you'd give to a child who's obviously lying but it's more effort than it's worth to confront them about it

                                            >"She's in the library. Seriously, don't ask about the poison joke."

                                            "Yeah, yeah, whatever you gem-munching fag."

                                            >He opens the door more so that you can squeeze in

                                            >You immediately start for the library

                                            >This place seems almost nostalgic, back from your first few days here

                                            >Back when the current pony-you wasn't made yet and had just gotten here, Twi wanted to study you

                                            >And again when Twilight gave you pony-lessons and magic lessons after her cloning failure

                                            >You reach her personal library door, and find it closed shut

                                            >Usually a sign that whatever she's trying to research, she's deep into it

                                            >A perfect time to yell for her loudly while walking in

                                            "OH TWILIGHT! I NEED SOME HELP FROM THE PRINCESS OF FRIENDSHIP!"

                                            >You walk in to see the mare stumble off a stepping stool while letting out a pained cry

                                            >She quickly gets up, and shoots you a glare

                                            >"Spike should've told you that I'm-"

                                            "Not helping me find poison joke. Yeah, I've heard. I just have a question, a very important question that I need you to answer. Purely academic."

                                            >Twilight gives you a shocked look

                                            >"You... have an academic question? For me? You're the same Anon that slept through all of my lectures on how to be a pony, and you have a question?"

                                            "Yeah, don't get your tail in a twist. It's been bothering me, what exactly is a unicorn horn made of?"

                                            >Her face lights up in a way you've only seen just before your lessons

                                            >"I thought you'd never ask such an important and scholarly question! It's quite simple, I just need to get a couple of my bio-sorcery books from the other shelf and we can get started!"

                                            >This might have been a mistake

                                            >"To start you off, what do you know about our horns?"

                                            "That I traded my lower horn for this one, and that it makes magic."

                                            >She completely ignores your joke while levitating a few books from the shelves

                                            >"They don't make magic, they harness it from a nearby gland. Now, do you have any theories on what they're made of?"

                                            "Bone, maybe? Or a solid chunk of hair like a buffalo?"

                                            >"Neither, it's a completely different structure completely!"

                                            >Her voice pitches up in enthusiasm as she finds the book she was looking for. "Basic Pony Physiology - Second Edition"

                                            >Opening it up, she points at a diagram of a unicorn head with a label on the horn

                                            "...Alicorn? Isn't that what you and Lulu are?"

                                            >"Well, yes, but it was discovered by Starswirl the Bearded that horns were in fact not bone but a highly conductive bonelike material that had a plethora of nerve-endings that could not sense pain. He named the material after the princesses to honor their strength and sensitivity. Also, that's Princess Luna to you, not Lulu."

                                            "Huh. The more you know. Now, second question."

                                            >Twilight stamps her hooves in a sort of clapping of excitement

                                            >"Yes, Nonny?"

                                            "Where's Discord, I have an idea-"

                                            >Her smile immediately drops, and her horn lights up

                                            >"No."

                                            >You hear a pop, and you blink to find yourself right outside your house

                                            "C'mon! That whole thing was weeks ago!"

                                            >It was worth a shot anyway

                                            >You hear the human Anon inside

                                            >"Oh, sounds like she's back. Wait here, I'll get her for you."

                                            >He opens the door and looks at you with a smile

                                            >Oh fuck you know that smile, that's your I've-Already-Won shit-eating grin special

                                            "What did you do?"

                                            >"I found a way to get through to you."

                                            >Damn, forgot about that

                                            >It's getting late, so maybe it's something quick

                                            >Neither of you like to miss bedtime

                                            >You walk in the door only to have that hope crushed

                                            >Three fillies, three sleeping bags, and your own markless ass

                                            "Oh, hey girls, what's up?"

                                            >Your attempt at a calm, collected voice comes out as a shaky, nervous one

                                            >You really hope they don't say what you think they're going to say

                                            >Sweetie Belle confirms your worst thoughts

                                            >"Mr. Anon said we could have a sleepover! Isn't that great, Nonny?"

                                            >You quietly swear an even deeper oath of vengeance upon Anon for this