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No Student Parking in the Faculty Lot 2

By Greggums
Created: 2021-10-24 10:10:13
Expiry: Never
anonymousprincipal celestiavice principal luna/egq/dean cadence

  1. 1.
    Originally Published March 2nd, 2018
  2. 2.
     
  3. 3.
    >Monday in Equestria
  4. 4.
    >You are Vice-Principal Luna
  5. 5.
    >You enjoy helping educate young minds
  6. 6.
    >And there is a horse in your parking space
  7. 7.
    >A beautiful mare with a pristine white coat
  8. 8.
    >A pristine white that you can just barely see through what must be four layers of blue dye and given black dappling
  9. 9.
    >There's even a crescent moon of undyed fur that's on each of its flanks
  10. 10.
    >And trying desperately to get out from an upside down saddle is Anonymous
  11. 11.
    Oh god.
  12. 12.
    >You roll down your window and lean your head out
  13. 13.
    Anonymous! Why is there a horse in the faculty lot?
  14. 14.
    >Anonymous strains to look at you, causing the horse to fidget
  15. 15.
    >"Oh hey, VP! You're probably wondering about Princess Luna here."
  16. 16.
    >He pats the horse as he says this
  17. 17.
    Yes, I a-why does that horse have my name?
  18. 18.
    >"Well I was walking home last night," Anonymous grins, "and I was just struck by the beauty of this majestic creature. She reminded me so much of you!"
  19. 19.
    >He pats the horse again, and you swear you can see it wince
  20. 20.
    >"So I broke her free, cleaned her up, and brought her to you as a gift! I just cant get the saddle right though..."
  21. 21.
    >He starts fidgeting with the straps again, and a smile spreads across your face
  22. 22.
    Allow me to help you!, you exclaim before leaning onto your horn.
  23. 23.
    >BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP
  24. 24.
    >The horse panics and runs out of the lot, carrying a screaming Anon with it
  25. 25.
    >"Stay, Princess Luna! HEEEEEEEEEL..."
  26. 26.
    >His screams fade out as they round the corner
  27. 27.
    >Giggling, you park your car and practically skip to your office
  28. 28.
    >No need for a reminder today, since Anon will probably be a while before he makes it back to the school
  29. 29.
     
  30. 30.
    >Tuesday in Equestria
  31. 31.
    >You are Dean Cadence
  32. 32.
    >Head of Crystal Prep Academy
  33. 33.
    >And there is a young man on a horse in your parking space
  34. 34.
    >Well, less on and more under, really
  35. 35.
    >He looks pretty scraped up, so you stop your car and get out to help him
  36. 36.
    Are you alright, Mister...
  37. 37.
    >"Name's Anonymous", he tiredly declares as he tries to look at you
  38. 38.
    >When his eyes catch yours, he seems to brighten up considerably
  39. 39.
    >"But you can call me 'Smitten', sweetness", he winks at you
  40. 40.
    >You let him drop to the floor as you undo the last strap
  41. 41.
    I think I'll stick with "Anonymous", thank you.
  42. 42.
    >He groans as he rolls over to look at you
  43. 43.
    >"Yes, you're right! I'm afraid our love cannot be."
  44. 44.
    >He strikes a dramatic pose for emphasis
  45. 45.
    >Love? You barely know him!
  46. 46.
    I'm sorry?
  47. 47.
    >"Yes, for my heart is already taken by the fair Miss Luna. I mean, you're nice and all, but I'm not really into cougars."
  48. 48.
    >He pats you on the head as he jogs out of the lot, leaving the horse with you
  49. 49.
    >"Later toots! I got a woman to woo! Maybe I should try ice cream this time...."
  50. 50.
    >As he leaves, you pull out your phone and call the number on the saddle, telling the owner where to pick up his horse
  51. 51.
    >Then you push 3 on the speed-dial
  52. 52.
    Luna? It's Cadence. I'm sorry I ever doubted you.
  53. 53.
    >"I told you!"
  54. 54.
     
  55. 55.
    >It's Monday in Equestria
  56. 56.
    >You are Principal Celestia
  57. 57.
    >You enjoy long walks on the beach and sunbathing during the summer months
  58. 58.
    >And in your office is a young, greenish boy
  59. 59.
    >Your sister, Vice-Principal Luna is standing behind him, a pained expression on her face
  60. 60.
    So, Mr Anonymous. Would you mind explaining why you are here this morning?
  61. 61.
    >He clears his throat, and begins picking at his fingernails
  62. 62.
    >"Well, today is my lady love's birthday, so I decided I should do something special for her."
  63. 63.
    >Ah, young love. You had so many boys after you when you went to high school, all doing foolish things to try and get your attention.
  64. 64.
    >"So, I built a papier-mache statue to show just how much I care about her, an-"
  65. 65.
    >Luna doubles over and begins laugh
  66. 66.
    >"AND THEN-HAH- IT FELL OVER ONTO YOUR CAR AND EXPLODED"
  67. 67.
    Yes, I'm sure she'll still enjoy any gift you gi-...exploded?
  68. 68.
    >Luna throws open your blinds, showing the school janitors struggling to put out a flaming green civic in the faculty lot.
  69. 69.
    >Next to it is what you believe to be a large statue of your sister as Aphrodite
  70. 70.
    >It too is on fire
  71. 71.
    >"AHAHAHAHA, I TELL YOU T-TIME AND AGAIN, NOTAHAHA"
  72. 72.
    >Luna falls to the ground laughing, not even trying to speak anymore
  73. 73.
    >Anonymous meanwhile is crossing something out in a small notebook and mumbling
  74. 74.
    >"So the Lunaphrodite is a no go...I knew I should have gone with the ice cream cake!"
  75. 75.
    >Back in the faculty lot, the civic has been put out
  76. 76.
    >You see firetrucks pull into the lot to put out the statue, smacking Anonymous's civic into your car on their way in
  77. 77.
    >Luna is gasping for air as she continues laughing
  78. 78.
    >"AH MY SIDES AAHAHA"
  79. 79.
    >You sigh and reach for the emergency whisky in your desk
  80. 80.
    >This is going to be a long day

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