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[FLUTTERRAPE] Multiverse Adventures

By Nebulus
Created: 2020-12-17 16:46:05
Updated: 2021-07-03 09:30:45
Expiry: Never

  1. Originally uploaded to Pastebin: December 17th, 2012
  2. ---
  3.  
  4. >Day ADVENTURE HO in Equestria
  5. >Wake up and yawn
  6. >Feels like one of those days
  7. >You know which ones.
  8. >No, not those.
  9. >THOSE days.
  10. >Yeah, those.
  11. >Get out of bed and throw on whatever was on the floor
  12. >Shit shave shower
  13. >Walk downstairs and open the door
  14. >Pick up the paper
  15. >"Extremely dangerous experimental technology stolen!"
  16. >Blink
  17. >Look up
  18. >Fluttershy is stood infront of you, beaming
  19. >She's wearing a large box on her back, covered in flashing lights and cup-holders
  20. >Belts, straps and velcro are sticking out all over her to secure the machine to her back
  21. >Look back down at the paper
  22. >"It looks like this if you see it"
  23. >Picture looks identical to the box Fluttershy is wearing
  24. >Look at her
  25. >Check your watch
  26. >8:00 AM
  27. >Sigh
  28. >Oh yeah. It's gonna be one of THOSE days alright.
  29. Go on. What now.
  30. >"S-so Anon, A nice pony lended this machine to me! They said it would make you love me!"
  31. >Look at the paper
  32. >"Scientist 'Antee Mater' reported being forced to the ground and had to watch as a masked mare bludgeoned the entire science team then jumped out the window screaming about the power of love"
  33. >Look back up at Fluttershy
  34. I am so not in the mood for this shit.
  35. >"Tough"
  36. >She slams a dial attached to her forehoof and the machine starts up
  37. >Read the paper some more while Fluttershy tries to do stupid shit
  38. >"The Funky-Lighty-Universe-Tearing-Temporal-Energy-Rift-Singularity-Harbinger-Yes Machine was created with the intention of Science"
  39. >"When asked what kind of science, Antee Mater replied 'Hell if I know. But it looks cool'"
  40. >Hear a low whirr come from Fluttershy's machine
  41. >Look up
  42. >She's shaking like a Jackhammer and is clearly scared of her own looted piece of tech
  43. >Scrunch up the paper and throw it over your shoulder
  44. >Clasp your hands together and assume a ready postion
  45. Alright, Science. Show me what you've got
  46. >Feel your body become weightless as you and Fluttershy are torn out of Equestria and deposited in a different plane of existence
  47. >You both pop back into reality and stagger around for a bit
  48. >Fluttershy throws up
  49. >Gross
  50. >Look around
  51. >Well fuck
  52. >You and Y.Pone are stood on a desloate plateau overlooking a equally dead looking valley
  53. >Creatures you can't even begin to comprehend circle the skies and the screams of a thousand alien lifeforms hit your ears
  54. >There are also 7 suns, but you're more concerned about the aliens
  55. >Turn back to Fluttershy, who's just recovering
  56. Nice work, Fluttershy. You sent us to an alien world with seven suns.
  57. >"O-oh good. Is it your fetish?"
  58. No. No it isn't.
  59. >"Darn it. I was sure you'd love this"
  60. >Look down to the valley and watch a swarm of creatures collide with another in a vicious melee of fang and claw
  61. >The monsters violently tear each other asunder and don't stop until every single creature is dead
  62. >Blood and other unnamable substances coat the area where the battle happened
  63. Oh yeah, I was sure I'd love it here as well. Now please send us home.
  64. >"Ok ok... Fucking Anon..."
  65. What was that?
  66. >You both get sucked back into the void and tumble around for a while until you both land in the middle of a grassy field
  67. >Fluttershy groans
  68. >You don't, because you're hardcore.
  69. >Look around
  70. >Well there's your first problem
  71. >This isn't Equestria.
  72. >Nudge a wheezing Fluttershy with your foot
  73. Get up. You haven't sent us home.
  74. >"W-what? But I pressed... umm... oh..."
  75. >That doesn't sound good
  76. >Pinch the bridge of your nose with your finger and thumb then sigh
  77. What now?
  78. >You knew you should have stayed in bed today
  79. >"W-well the instruction manual said that in order to get back the original destination, you need to suck hot monkey dick"
  80. I see... I see...
  81. >Wait no you don't
  82. Wait no I don't, what was that last bit?
  83. >She blushes
  84. >"S-so if you want to get home, you'd better get naked, mister!"
  85. >Yeah.
  86. >Nah.
  87. >Crack your knuckles
  88. Please remember that I take absolutely no joy in doing this, Fluttershy
  89. >She starts backing away
  90. And that any injuries you may sustain are purely by accident
  91. >She starts shaking
  92. >"N-now d-don't do anything you'll r-regret, Anon"
  93. >Body Slam her
  94. >You both kick and scream like little girls for about 5 minutes until you managed to tear the machine off Fluttershy's back
  95. >She also orgasmed like, 4 times throughout that
  96. >Fuckin' Horse.
  97. >Attach the machine to your back
  98. >The straps are tight as hell
  99. >Look at Fluttershy, who's twitching on the floor in a puddle of discharge and happiness
  100. >"W-was that good for you too, Anon?"
  101. You're hilarious. Now get up and lets go. I'll show you how to operate a fucking Singularity Generator
  102. >You once beat the first level of Starcraft 2 on Normal mode. So how hard can this be?
  103. >Press the dial on your wrist
  104. >One rollercoaster ride and a wave of temporal sickness later you arrive in Equestri-
  105. >Hang on, no, you fucked up as well.
  106. >Look around at the Alien city stretching before you
  107. >Watch hovercars and hoverboards fly past your head
  108. >A hover-newspaper is at your feet
  109. >Pick it up
  110. >October 21, 2015
  111. Great Scott.
  112. >Fluttershy seems to be getting better with rift-travel
  113. >She stares in awe at the city
  114. >"Oh my goodness! It's so... Pretty"
  115. >You have to admit. It's a spectacular sight
  116. >Skyscrapers as tall as the heavens
  117. >Billions of lights and sounds all around you
  118. >A jungle of cold steel and computers
  119. >You almost feel at home
  120. >Fluttershy looks at you
  121. >"A-are you ok, Anon? Is this your fetish?"
  122. Nearly. But it's not home.
  123. >"Do you miss home?"
  124. More than you can imagine. Come on, lets go.
  125. >Slap the wrist dial
  126. >Nothing
  127. >Oh.
  128. Fluttershy, check the box, is there anything different?
  129. >She flies up behind it
  130. >"Insert monkey dick"
  131. I'll eat every animal you own.
  132. >"INSERT MORE SALT! INSERT MORE SALT!"
  133. That's better
  134. >Well. A rift machine powered by salt
  135. >That's just rad.
  136. Come on, you. Lets go find some salt. Gotta be SOME lying around.
  137. >You and Fluttershy wander around the alien city for about 30 minutes, awestruck by the sheer complexity of it all
  138. >You literally cannot see the tops of some buildings.
  139. >It's broad daylight, but you can't see them.
  140. >These aliens must be gods of their time.
  141. >"FUCK YOU, YA BLOODY BASTARD! I'LL FUCKIN' CUT YOU, YEAH?"
  142. >Now that's just silly
  143. >Walk over to two aliens arguing
  144. >They look like humans, but with 4 arms, green skin and eyes so slanted it makes an asian man look white.
  145. >Fucking hell you're racist.
  146. >They're pushing each other and shouting in a Middle-eastern accent
  147. >This place is weird
  148. >Clear your throat as you approach
  149. Uhh, excuse me, gentle..uuhhh, men? But where can I find some salt?
  150. >They look at you with shocked expressions
  151. >Oh yeah. You and the talking horse probably aren't from around here
  152. >"That fuckin' human?"
  153. >"Sheeeeeeeeit! I though they all extinct!"
  154. >"Fuckin' cray, that, bro."
  155. Extict. What.
  156. >"Yeah, man! You peeps are fuckin' crazy! Went and picked a fight with the Albraxan Empire! You all got fucked up and your homeworld got blown up!"
  157. Oh. Ok then.
  158. >You're quite sure how to take this news. But then again this IS a different universe
  159. >Thank god for the multiverse theory
  160. >You realise, as you stand talking to an alien being who isn't hostile, and is also speaking fluent english, that you must be the luckiest man in the history of the universe
  161. >Fucking Lady Luck
  162. Sooo yeah, where can I find salt?
  163. >"Salt? Just go to a cafe, man. There's one over there."
  164. >He points two arms at a neon-lit diner with several aliens eating at tables
  165. Thanks a bunch, really.
  166. >"No problem. Always happy to help a human. Our races got on great until those faggot Albraxans ruined everything."
  167. >"Oh and one more thing, you might wanna keep your horse-thingy on a leash. Can't take pets into cafes"
  168. I kinda guessed that. Well I'd better be going, laters, bro!
  169. >You walk over to the diner
  170. >Stop just outside it
  171. >Turn to Fluttershy who's been oddly quiet this whole time
  172. Ok. I'm gonna go in there and grab as much salt as I can. You stay out here and don't do anything stupid. Ok?
  173. >"umm... ok... P-please don't be long, I don't like these creatures"
  174. They aren't so bad. You just need to be more assertive.
  175. >She smiles at that
  176. >You glare at her
  177. You got us stranded in a parallel universe. You don't get to smile
  178. >She frowns
  179. Much better.
  180. >Walk inside the diner and up to what you assume is a waiter
  181. Uhhh, hi.
  182. >He looks at you and gasps
  183. >"Holy hell! I thought you people were extinct!"
  184. Nope. Can I have some salt?
  185. >"Sure!"
  186. >Runs into the kitchen, leaving you in the middle of the diner floor
  187. >Aliens are looking at you and taking pictures
  188. >You smile slightly and give little awkward waves
  189. >The waiter comes running back in
  190. >"Here's your salt, mister human! H-have a great day!"
  191. Thanks, buddy
  192. >He mumbles something like "he called me buddy" before fainting
  193. >Whatever
  194. >Walk out the cafe with a bowl of salt
  195. >Fluttershy is literally glowing. Like she's irradiated
  196. What did you do?
  197. >"Umm. W-well a nice alien came and offered me some of this liquid... And I didn't want to say no-"
  198. Did you drink radioactive fluids?
  199. >"...Yes"
  200. Fucks sake. Well lets hope you don't die or get superpowers. Because I don't want to have to explain that when we get back
  201. >Fluttershy pours the salt into the machine and it churns again
  202. >It speaks out in a generic robotic voice
  203. >"FULL. POWER."
  204. >Cool
  205. Right. Hang on tight, Ya goddamn rapist. Next stop- EQUESTRIA!
  206. >Slam the dial and the rift opens
  207. >You land gracefully on your face at the other end of the void
  208. >Fluttershy lands on your leg and starts humping it
  209. >"Ugh, oh-OH! Oh yes..."
  210. >Shake her off like you would with an overbearing dog
  211. Knock it off, asshole. We're he- OH COME ON!
  212. >Fire rains down from the skies over the boiling seas.
  213. >You and Fluttershy are stood on a little island that's dissolving fast
  214. >Fluttershy sees this
  215. >"PUSH THE DIAL!"
  216. >You push that fucking dial
  217. >Pop into another world
  218. >This one has Dinosaurs
  219. >Pop into another world
  220. >Everything is made of mirrors
  221. >Pop into another world
  222. >End up in a city much like New York
  223. Woah, hey, is this Earth?
  224. >Look around
  225. >Walk over to a taxi-driver
  226. Hey, buddy, is this New York?
  227. >"No shit, sherlock. Since you're so amazing at stating the obvious, let me ask YOU a question. Is that a meteorite?"
  228. >Look up
  229. >There's a fucking meteorite heading towards you
  230. OOOOOH SHHHHIT!
  231. >Press the dial just as the meteor collides with the Empire State Building
  232. >Pop into another world
  233. >"Greetings, Anon. We are the Council. We have been expecting you."
  234. Awesome.
  235. >"You have finally arrived after millions of years of us waiting. And now we shall grant you the secrets of the universe"
  236. Am I going to Hell?
  237. >"No."
  238. Good.
  239. >Press the dial
  240. >Pop into another world
  241. >This time there's grass, and a familar scent on the wind. You look around and see Sweet Apple Acres, Applejack is sorting out some tools and other objects
  242. >Smile
  243. Finally.
  244. >Turn to Fluttershy
  245. Well. Looks like we're home.
  246. >She looks worn out
  247. >"So was any of that your fetish?"
  248. Nah.
  249. >"Thank Celestia. I'm going home"
  250. >She just walks away
  251. Hey! Don't you want your machine back?
  252. >She shouts over her shoulder
  253. >"Keep it! I don't want it anymore!"
  254. >Huh. Cool.
  255. >Walk home and throw the machine down on the kitchen table
  256. >Stare at it for a while
  257. What the hell am I going to do with you?
  258. >Think
  259. >Bingo.
  260. >5 minutes later you smile as you read a book with your feet up on your new interdimensional footrest
  261. >Today was weird.
  262. >Fucking Fluttershy.
  263.  
  264. The End.

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