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1936 10.79 KB 169
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>sometimes all of ponyville holds a big town-wide game of pretend
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>all that really means just pretend fighting (no contact of course)
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>and anon LOVED it
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>he loved it so much that he started ordering cosplay outfits from rarity just to get more into the feel of it
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>but this isn’t where our story begins
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>no, not in the slightest
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>for you see, twilight made the grave mistake of giving anon an amulet
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>and not just any amulet mind you
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>but an amulet that can perform some pretty aesthetic spells
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>nothing more than teleportation and sound and lights
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>sadly for twilight, this would be one of her biggest mistakes
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“Twi, I can’t play until you hit my summon sign”
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>twilight was secretly an avid dark snowpity fan
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>from her perspective, she thought this was bound to be a cool adventure with her new side kick
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>but brewing within anons mind is a scheme to really piss her off
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>twilight was surely autistic
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>she had to have been
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>anon had never seen someone go on such long and detailed rants about the most mundane stuff in her stupid pony videogames
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>but there’s nothing in this world that really wrecks her autistic brain as much as one thing
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>inconsistancy
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>and there’s nothing more inconsistent to her than crossovers
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>sometimes she gets so twi-tistic that when she sees spike reading one of those mass produced crossover comics she has to go on a walk just to cool down
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>and today, anon knew just how to get her good
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>”OOH! This is gonna be so FUN!”
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>she playfully taps the glowing squiggles on the ground playing along with anons newfound abilities
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>anon disappears only for him to rise from the ground gracefully
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>thought for twilight, seeing him do the ‘praise the sun’ pose despite having a white sign has already gave her a good dose of annoyance
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>though if that weren’t enough, anon had decided to change outfits (magically of couse) in the time it took for him to rise from his summon sign
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>”anon… what is… that…”
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>her disappointment is obvious
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“Cmon twi, I thought i would switch it up a little bit”
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>”REALLY, HERD FORTRESS 2???”
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“... gotta admit it’s stylish…”
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>her scrunch is immeasurable and her tone is venomous
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>”it just doesn’t fit…”
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“But twi, I love playing scout”
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>anon absolutely hated scout but he had to do it for the bit
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>”fine…”
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>anon and twilight roam around town waiting to surprise attack any nearby contenders
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>’fights’ sprawl around town consisting of imaginary weapons and lots of vocal sound effects
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>twilight unenthusiastically leads anon towards pinkie pie
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>currently she is having an absolute BLAST
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>swinging her big, uh, i’m not sure maybe it’s like a really big sword, I can’t read her mind honestly
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>but basically she’s fighting off derpy and fluttershy
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>the only reason she hasn’t flat out won yet is because derpy doesn’t understand the rules and never back down and fluttershy is way to cautious to try
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>twilight turns to anon to reveal her plan
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>”okay anon, im going to loop around behind pinkie while she’s distracted and sneak attack”
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>”I need you to distract her in case anything goes wrong”
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“Got it“
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>anon in fact, did not get it
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>anon planned for nothing more than to annoy her
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>following her plans would defeat that purpose
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>as twilight pretended to be sneaky (which always worked for who knows what reason) anon had another plan in mind
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>just as twilight was about to get in position, anon pulled out his imaginary rocket launcher and made his (vocal) attack
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“WOOSH”
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>flutters pinkie and derpy all looked towards anon
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>anon spread out his arms to mimic an explosion effect (saying boom super loud is too evil even for anon)
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>with smiles on their faces they all play along, even derpy had a huge grin as she flung her front hooves up and rolled backwards
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>by the time it was all over they were all giggling and having a fun time
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>anon saw twilight peak around the corner of her surprise attack spot with shock
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>but he had one more little trick up his sleeve
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“CAT BEANZ!”
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>twilight’s face was motionless
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>anon cringed horribly inside but he REALLY needed to pull this off
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>derpy rolls over and faces anon while still on the ground
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“OH! THAT’S DEMO PONE’S TAUNT!”
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>twilight’s brain finally made it back to reality upon hearing this obvious mistake
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>she jumps out of her hiding spot to confront anon
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>”THAT’S NOT WHAT HE SAYS, NOT ONLY DOES SCOUT NOT DO THAT TAUNT, BUT DEMO PONE SAYS KA-BOOM, EVERYPONY KNOWS THAT”
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>anon feigns ignorance
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“But, but I thought that’s what he says…”
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>twilight tries everything she can to suppress her anger at anons clear disrespect of her glorious franchise
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>sucks for her that she’s twi-tistic and is about to have a melt down
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>”THAT. IS. NOT. WHAT. HE. SAYS!”
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>anon and the other three look at twi a little surprised
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>twilight grumbles before looking back at anon
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>”I’m not playing with you anymore if you don’t play it right…”
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>anon actually kind of starts to feel bad for pissing her off so much
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“Alright, I’m sorry twi, i’ll play the game the way you want from now on”
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>twilight seemd content with that answer for now
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>it’s too bad anon has short term memory loss
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>team anon and twi finally made it to town square
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>the place with the most action
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>and anon had to scramble his brain in order to come up with something else to because he was running out of material
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>”okay anon, listen, town square is filled, im thinking if you back me up with healing spells I can take on some of the fighters on the outskirts”
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>”We can make our way in slowly and then we can take the winners crown for ourselves”
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>now, the winners crown was simply a cardboard crown colored with markers
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>but to the residents of ponyville, to win that crown is a symbol of high status
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>not that anypony else is low status, that would be mean
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>anyways, anon had to come up with something but he was running out of time
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>twilights plans were essentially already in motion so he had to play along for a little bit
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>as twilight swung her imaginary sword with autistic vril her opponents played along and fell back with each swing
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>but unlike her opponents, when twilight is hit she simply looks to you to ‘heal’ her so she can keep playing indefinitely
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>this goes on for a little while until you find a golden opportunity
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>a lone changeling, clearly nervous to be in ponyville all alone
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>he looks on at the crowd completely unaware of your gaze
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>he seemed like he was anxious to join in but was worried about something
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>this was perfect
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“D CLASS SPOTTED”
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>everypony turns to you and stops fighting
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>the lone changeling whips his head around to face you
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>you get in position to fire your ki blast
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“Kaaaaa, Maaaaaae, Haaaaaaa, Maaaaaae…”
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>you fire your imaginary kamehameha towards the changeling (within a reasonable volume of course)
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“HAAAAAAAAA!”
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>everypony’s eyes track the imaginary blast as it goes straight towards him
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>his face lights up with joy as he prepares his part in the play
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>he stands up on his hind legs, twirls around with his front leg on his forehead then falls over and lets his tongue hang out
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>but he still keeps one eye open to see everyones reaction
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>twilight grits her teeth and slowly turns to you
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>now was your chance
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>in your most overly exaggerated voice you spoke
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“Counter-terrorists win!”
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>her face fills with red as she grits
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>now this would have been funny under any other circumstance
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>but you see there’s one little issue
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>her eyes are teary
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>for normal ponies that means sad
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>but for somepony with horse autism that meant an incoming meltdown
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>she huffs and puffs before shouting
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>”NONE *HUFF* OF *HUFF* THOSE *HUFF* THINGS *HUFF* EVEN *HUFF* GO *HUFF*TOGETHERRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrraaaaAAAAAAAAAAHHHHhhhhh”
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>twilight stomps her hooves in a tantrum
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>”THEY. DONT. FIT. TOGETHER. THEY. DONT. FIT!!!!!!”
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>she sprawls out on the ground continuing her tantrum
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>now anon surely felt bad
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>but he REALLY has to finish out the bit
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“Twi, wait, I’m sorry, it’s just that…”
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>she looks up at you from the ground still bitterly angry at anon not being as much of a puritan as she is about her favorite media
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>”JUST WHAT!”
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>the final strike is about to commence
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“It’s just that, I haven’t even done my taunt after the takedown”
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>twilights eyes look like they’re on fire
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>both her and anon know what comes next
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“CAT BEA-”
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>her rage boils over so much that she starts frothing at the mouth
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>everypony panics, including that one changeling, though he looks like he’s pretty clueless about what’s going on so he’s having fun
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>anon panics thinking he just fried twilights purple brain from so much cringe
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>suddenly a nurse red heart runs up to twilight
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>she grabs an emergency canteen of chocolate milk and pours it onto twilights lips slowly
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>as twilight slowly comes back from her autistic HYPER meltdown she starts to just barely move her mouth around to lap up the chocolate milk
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>after a few seconds pass she starts to gain back her motor control and grabs the canteen and chugs it for all it’s worth
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>the aftermath was a mixed bag
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>twilight had to go to the hospital, apparently chocolate milk and cookies were needed to keep her healthy after such an intense meltdown and she needed to be monitored for a bit
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>on the other hand, anon’s performance wowed everypony so much they all decided to give him the victory crown for this months game
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>anon made friends with that one changeling and got him to socialize around ponyville after the game officially ended
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>at least anon did one good thing
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>but honestly, one good thing didn’t make up for how bad he felt
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>hey, anon might be retarded but he’s not stupid, he still had a conscience
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>anon entered twilights hospital room
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“Um, hey twi…”
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>she looks at him all grumpy like
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>”what do YOU want…”
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>little did twilight know, anon had something behind his back just for her
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“Twilight… you’ve been a really good friend to me for a long time now”
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“You even put up with me all day even after i was so mean to you, I kind of got carried away and i’m ~actually~ sorry for it this time…”
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>twilight is still silent and refuses to look anon in the eye
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“I know you’re mad, but i figured i would give you something that rightfully belongs to you”
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>her eyes flick towards anon but her head stays facing the window
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>anon pulls out the victory crown and presents it to Twilight
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“I think you deserve this twi, I wouldn’t have made it outside the front door if it weren’t for your quick thinking”
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“...we were a team after all, and besides, this crown represents more than just victory, but also how good of a team member you really are”
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>twilight looks down for a moment only to look back up with a big smile
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>”I, I… Thanks anon!”
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>though she didn’t say much, her smile said it all…
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The End :D
by Wall-o-text
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