SCP-000


                                            >SCP-000

                                            >Containment Class: Apollyon-Thaumiel

                                            >Danger: Incalculable

                                            >Disruption: SCP-000's true nature would likely cause 15x the harm of finding out that [REDACTED] isn't real


                                            >Special Containment Protocols:

                                            >SCP-000 cannot be physically contained by any currently-known mortal means.

                                            >Containment of SCP-000 relies on making SCP-000 believe it is in control of its surroundings.

                                            >To this end, SCP-000 is contained within an elaborate staged play centered around the core chambers of Site-001.

                                            >SCP-000 is generally oblivious and unambitious so long as its ego is sated; within its containment center, it will be content to make sweeping and non-specific demands that are generally in line with the Foundation's mission.

                                            >In the event of SCP-000 going afield and/or in any way directly interfering with Foundation operations, the risk of casualties and containment breaches increases astronomically.

                                            >Do. Not. Let. This. Happen.

                                            >MTF Round Table will carry out daily memetic incantations and rituals to keep SCP-000 in a state of self-containment.

                                            >MTF Baker's Dozen will keep SCP-000 fed by any means necessary.

                                            >SCP-000's containment measures are producing diminishing returns at a slow but steady rate.

                                            >It is expected that containment will fail entirely within [REDACTED] years.

                                            >Due to the extreme risk to morale and SCP-000's reach and influence, speculation as to the true cause of SCP-000 is strictly prohibited.


                                            >Description:

                                            >SCP-000 is a tall, white unicorn of aberrant musculoskeletal features; commonly referred to as Princess Celestia.

                                            >Previously assumed to be a pony of great importance, recent and consistent patterns of events have put this into question.

                                            >SCP-000 has displayed flagrant disregard for beings it commands(1), complete lack of tactical or strategic acumen(2), pettiness unbefitting of even a schoolfilly(3) and active hinderance towards those defending its person(4).

                                            >While any long-lived creature is bound to take missteps, the recent extreme trend of these and other abnormal behaviors shows no sign of stopping.

                                            >By unanimous O5 secret vote, SCP-000 was classified as Old and Stupid(5), and containment measures were seamlessly integrated through previous routines.

                                            >Meg help us all if she finds out.


                                            >1. Sending the six of us to FIGHT A GOD without even a doctor or a wilderness survival expert!?

                                            >2. What about the wedding she insisted on when there was an army of bugs screaming that they wanted to invade?

                                            >3. OOH! Speaking of wedding, she made Twilight cry and never apologized even after Twilight turned out to be right!

                                            >4. Y'all 'member the Storm King? Don't we have big catapults? Seems like he should never have gotten close to Canterlot. Like, ever.

                                            >5. Yea and verily and such, my sister really is a pill. And not the kind you take with your mouth.


                                            *****


                                            >Twilight flipped through the palacewarming present Celestia had left her

                                            >An older model of Foundation journal, containing what Celestia considered their 'greatest hits.'

                                            >Her diary synced with the tome and opened itself to a clean command page

                                            >Welcome, user: O6 TWILIGGHT. Suggested page: SCP-000.

                                            "Ha. I remember this one- we really thought Celestia had gone senile for a bit. Good times. Thankfully she was still Celestia so she just laughed about it."

                                            >WARNING

                                            >INVISIBLE INK DETECTED

                                            >ATTEMPTING TO PARSE

                                            >ADDITIONAL TEXT PRESENT

                                            "What."

                                            >LEXICOGRAPHICAL ENCHANTMENTS DETECTED

                                            >TRIGGERING IN SANDBOX

                                            >STANDBY

                                            >ENCHANTMENT CONFERS SEAL OF AUTHORITY:

                                            >HIDDEN TEXT SUPERCEDES PRIMARY TEXT VIA COMMAND AUTHORIZATION: FLUTTERPONY

                                            >WARNING: UNKNOWN RUNIC FRACTALS STILL PRESENT.

                                            >ESTIMATION: TARGETING PARAMETERS: G. G. G- ERggggOR

                                            >REBOOTING IN SAFE MODE

                                            >COMMENCING SECON-


                                            >Twiligght frowned and put her quill to the magic paper.

                                            "Negative. Display the document."

                                            >LOG DUMPED TO JOURNAL NUMBER TWO

                                            "I need to figure out what this is. SPIKE! No visitors until further notice!"

                                            >"Didn't that book just warn you there might be more tra-"

                                            "I always keep my inoculations up to date. Now go clear my schedule!"

                                            >"You'd think YOU of all ponies would know not to rush into-"

                                            >Spike slunk away as his sentence was cut off with a lavender glare from the lavender mare.


                                            >SCP-000

                                            >Containment Class: SHE IS COMPROMISED

                                            "We did think that, didn't we? Heh."

                                            >Danger: Total unsustainability of aetheric ecosystem. Subsequent collapse of all that we call 'Magic.'

                                            >Disruption: Total societal collapse, possible failure of the entire Tree of Harmony project. Most optimistic projection predicts a return to pre-diarchy ethnocentric city-states.


                                            >Twiligroght's eyebrows raised. Even her worst predictions about Celestia only amounted to more ponies in the nurse's office.


                                            >Special Containment Protocols:

                                            >SCP-000 is to be allowed to assume the Throne of Dusk and Dawn

                                            >As per the cover document, bureaucratic rituals are to be used to keep herHIM/ pacified and removed from any actual running of operations.

                                            >Keep everything orderly. Keep up with the routines. She likes routines, she likes her bookkeeping. Spike's little HANDS are so great for that, aren't they?

                                            "Hm. They are indeed."

                                            >Just act casual. Smooth transition of power. We can still fix this if we take TwiligGARht by surprise.

                                            "They're talking about ME!? How dare they!"

                                            >twiliGht spaRkle was nOt happy

                                            "Something fishy is going on here!"

                                            >the bad faith in her was just hurtful!

                                            >sure, she used some inflammatory lanGuAge when plotting against celestia, but everypony's done that!

                                            "But this? Total collapse of magic!? Ponies dwindling to scattered enclaves!? Failure of the-"

                                            >she Really should stand up for herself! [spoiler]DREAMSCAPE ANOMALY DETECTED. PRIMING.[/spoiler]

                                            >what was that about that stupid tree? what other secrets has the infernal princess kept?

                                            "Tree of Harmony? Project? That's not ominous at all."

                                            [spoiler]RED FLAG. TWILIGHT HAS BEEN BRIEFED ON SCP-11. SCP-000 INFECTION EARLIER THAN PREVIOUSLY SUSPECTED?.[/spoiler]

                                            "No. No. I'm better than this. I'll just ask."


                                            >Grrrrrr

                                            >Really princess

                                            >Of course it would be better if she read the entire thing right

                                            >Good idea

                                            >Attagirl

                                            >Read


                                            [spoiler]ANOMALY ISOLATED. PREPARING CONTINGENCY.[/spoiler]


                                            >do it

                                            >you know you want to

                                            "OKAY! AUGH! My mind IS racing today- I suppose leaving this book unfinished won't do my mental state any favors."

                                            >yes

                                            >ha ha ha yes

                                            >oh this is rich the sun nag is surrendering to me ha ha ha

                                            >wait

                                            >what

                                            >oh no

                                            >abort abort abort

                                            >you stupid book horse abort

                                            >there's a ward right at the end of that docum-


                                            >Twilight suffered a migraine and fell on her plot

                                            >At least she thinks that's what a migraine is, from Anon's descriptions

                                            >What sort of horrible episode was she just having? They say everypony is their own worst critic but even Rarity never yelled at herself that much!

                                            >Luckily, she had the instant pain relief of Book nearby

                                            >Book!

                                            >Open container!

                                            >Apply words therin to the brain via ocular absorption!

                                            >Be amazed as your durable kinderbrain reroutes pain signals to the lexiconic battery!

                                            >It's that simple!


                                            >Description:

                                            >SCP-000 is a mind-disrupting spectral entity, strongly suspected of harmfully influencing ponies throughout recent centuries

                                            >SCP-000 is suspected to be ponykind's oldest still-active enemy, in case the number didn't clue you in.

                                            >Once a potential victim is targeted, SCP-000 will insert itself and be experienced as an intrusive thoughtform

                                            >SCP-000 slowly asserts control by using the victim's existing quirks to mask its own desires, typically involving attaining total political power and/or slaves and/or removing ponykind's ability to defend themselves.

                                            >Previous suspected victims include but are not limited to:

                                            >Princess Luna

                                            >The Great and Powerful Trixie (Beatrice Lulamoon)

                                            >King Crystals 'Sombra' Crystals

                                            >Sunset Shimmer

                                            >Starlight Glimmer

                                            >Stygian

                                            >Cozy Glow

                                            >Does Chrysalis count? She looks like a pony with diabetes legs, so I'll count her too.

                                            >SCP-000's current host is suspected to be Twilight Sparkle

                                            >Given the entity's age, power and experience, and Twilight's tendency to brute force her way through any magical scroll/tome/candy wrapper she can find-

                                            >Princess Celestia is afraid she must declare [spoiler]she can cast Explosive Rune, you stupid sheep.[/spoiler]