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Anonfilly's Friendship Balloon [8]

By FajitasAnon
Created: 18th December 2020 12:44:27 AM
4th December 2021 04:06:51 AM

  1. >A cool autumn day in Equestria
  2. >Be the Great and Powerful Anonymous
  3. >You are not giving this cloak and hat back
  4. >Not even if she asks nicely
  5. >It's always nice watching the leaves start to fall in this time before the Running of the Leaves
  6. >It's quiet, peaceful
  7. >And some days, that's the way you like it
  8. >Even if that sun is DIRECTLY IN YOUR HATEPATH
  9. "FUCK YOU, YOU SHINING SACK OF SHIT!"
  10. >Somehow, this makes the late morning better
  11. >Your calm, collected, and reasonable discussion with Celestia's ward is interrupted by childish giggling
  12. >Ah shit, they're up to something
  13. >Following the sounds, you end up walking around your cozy house
  14. >To find Nonny and Green sitting next to a bound and gagged Starlight Glimmer
  15. >...this had better not be exactly what you think it is.
  16.  
  17. >Be a perfectly normal human analysis experiment gone wrong
  18. >Better known as Nonny the unicorn
  19. >You have a perfectly good explanation for why Commiehorse is bound and gagged
  20. "Hey, Anon. Nice to uh... see you here?"
  21. >Damn you tiny horse body, you're supposed to hide the nervousness
  22. >"Nonny. Green. Why is Starlight in ropes?"
  23. "Anon, there's a perfectly good explanation."
  24. >"That explanation better not involve three tickets on an air-balloon ride."
  25. "It may or may not, depending on what you consider an air balloon, a ride, and a ticket."
  26. >He knows. Fuck.
  27. >You subtly use your perfectly precise magic to take the tickets Green's hiding under her wing, then gently push her in front of Anon
  28. >"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
  29. >As she goes flying at Mach 2 into him, you start to book it
  30. >This plan was planned, dammit, for like a whole hour!
  31. >It's not gonna fail now!
  32.  
  33. >Be a mess of feathers and mild pain, currently known as Green
  34. >You're regretting not being allowed to choose a better name
  35. >And also regretting following Nonny's plan
  36. >"Green. What the fuck is going on?"
  37. >Anon groans in pain, and sits up after you were launched at him like a intercontinental ballistic fillymissile
  38. "I uh... blame Nonny?"
  39. >"You would, wouldn't you. Starlight, game's over, you can stop with the ropes."
  40. >What
  41. >Starlight teleports out of the ropes you so carefully tied to make sure that she couldn't
  42. >WHAT
  43. >"You really didn't have to play their game."
  44. >"Well, those two little fillies said they wanted to take me for a hot air balloon ride, and it sounded like fun. They insisted the ropes would make it more fun, but..."
  45. "How did you? What did you? Huh?"
  46. >"Green. I thought you'd remember by now. What do unicorns have?"
  47. >Anon points at Starlight's horn, like it's the most obvious thing in the world
  48. [spoiler]>Mostly because it totally is you fucking tard.[/spoiler]
  49. >"Starlight, could you be a dear and find Nonny for me? She and Green here have just a bit of explaining and apologizing to do."
  50. >Starlight sighs, and teleports away.
  51. >Anon whispers in your ear
  52. >"You forgot the magical binding, and to prep the hot air balloon beforehand. That, and she's not a dirty commie anymore. You two can have some salmon later, but I gotta save face here."
  53. >Right. He's you. Of course he's secretly on board.
  54.  
  55. >Be Nonny again, master of minds
  56. >And realize that you're somehow lost in Ponyville
  57. >This place is so small! How did you manage this!?
  58. >Shut up, we're small too now
  59. >Fair point
  60. >But the plan is still going! You have three tickets, a bound Pony Russian, and-
  61. >You forgot to get SeizeTheMeansOfProduction-light
  62. >fuck
  63. >And you sacrificed Green already
  64. >Fuck!
  65. >And a there's flash of blue in front of you, causing your concentration to drop
  66. >FUCK
  67. "Hey Starlight..."
  68. >She only looks mildly amused as you are teleported back to your house
  69. >You might have to take up Twiggle's lessons again for that trick
  70. >In front of you is... Anon holding Green by her scruff
  71. >"Nonny."
  72. >Yup, that's your... his I'm-tired-of-your-shit tone
  73. >"Mind explaining to our REFORMED communist friend here what exactly what you were doing?"
  74. >"Anon, what's a communist?" Stalinlight asks
  75. >"Don't worry about it, Star."
  76. >You realize there's no real escape route here
  77. >...might as well skip to the apology.
  78. >"Starlight, I'm sorry for trying to trick you into a wonderful hot air balloon ride."
  79. >"Anon, how is a hot air balloon ride bad?"
  80. >"Nonny, continue."
  81. >Fuck, that almost worked.
  82. "...and for planning to throw you out of that balloon for being part of the Red Menace."
  83. >"I'm sorry too! I mean, I didn't really plan this, but I'm sorry!"
  84. >Dammit Green, you're such a coward
  85. >Should've just taken the fall like I planned you to!
  86. >"Nonny, stop glaring at Glimmer. Now, Glimmy, any idea on how to give these two a proper punishment?"
  87. >He wouldn't, he didn't
  88. >"Well, I think that friendship is better than a punishment. I forgive you."
  89. >So easily? You smell a trap.
  90. >"Especially considering it wouldn't've worked anyway. I'm a unicorn too, you know."
  91. "Huh? But... hng. Right, you can teleport. How do you even do that?!"
  92. >Your cries of frustration are halted by Maolight's own idea
  93. >"Oh! I could teach you! That way we'll be better friends, and you'll think more next time before trying to throw a non-pegasus out of a balloon!"
  94. >"That's a wonderful idea, Glimglam. Still at the castle these days?"
  95. >"Yup!"
  96. >"I'll send her over... tomorrow morning work for you?"
  97. >"It's perfect. I still have some things to do today, so I'll see you later Anon! You too, Green, Nonny."
  98. >As she poofs away, you scream internally. This was not how this was supposed to go
  99. >This is the opposite of how this was supposed to go
  100. >And now you have to LEARN MAGIC FROM HER
  101. >At least you still have those tickets, there's room for a next ti-
  102. >DAMMIT YOU DROPPED THE TICKETS WHEN STARLIGHT APPEARED
  103. >You resign to sulking for the rest of the day
  104. >Such is life being the little green filly.

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