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Protagonist

By Writefag_Roulette
Created: 2021-07-16 21:31:33
Updated: 2021-01-20 14:27:30
Expiry: Never

  1.  
  2. >you suppose you've never really been the main character of the story you've been living in
  3. >to be sure, you've been in situations like this more times than you can count
  4. >but those stories have always been about...
  5. >her
  6. >a beam of dim starlight shines bright white through a gap in the forest canopy
  7. >it lights up the woods just enough for you to pick out the purple in her coat
  8. >Twilight Sparkle
  9. >she's effortlessly beautiful
  10. >brilliant
  11. >favored by the princesses
  12. >actually, she's a princess herself now
  13. >or, technically, she was
  14. >you see, that's just the reason you're watching over your sleeping friends in this forest tonight
  15. >nothing unusual in the course of your life
  16. >some artifacts you've never heard of were stolen by some megolomaniac
  17. >the megolomaniac escaped into the Everfree Forest
  18. >and now the six of you are sleeping in the dirt
  19. >except for you
  20. >it's your turn to stand watch
  21. >not that you're eager to sleep in the dirt
  22. >annoyingly enough these artifacts you've never heard of couldn't even have to decency to be jewels this time
  23. >no
  24. >they're some sort of apples
  25. >but apparently, if they aren't sitting in a jar somewhere in Canterlot Castle
  26. >then alicorns can't exist in Equestria
  27. >frankly, you find the whole premise highly unlikely
  28. >weren't Princesses Celestia and Luna supposed to have been alicorns when they first arrived in Equestria?
  29. >you're sure if you asked Twilight Sparkle she'd have an explanation for you
  30. >you're not really interested
  31. >so it was a pair of perfectly ordinary unicorns, one white and one blue
  32. >who commissioned another perfectly ordinary unicorn
  33. >this one purple
  34. >with the task of retrieving these apples
  35. >and this perfectly ordinary purple unicorn asked her five best friends in the whole wide world to help her
  36. >ah, but there are a few major complications that come from this
  37. >in the first place, since ordinary unicorns Celestia and Luna have only ordinary unicorn power, they cannot raise the Sun or the Moon
  38. >you seem to recall learning that before the two of them, ordinary unicorns would combine their powers and raise the Sun and Moon together
  39. >but what do you know?
  40. >so right now, neither the Sun nor the Moon are in the sky
  41. >and your journey thus far has been lighted only by horns and stars
  42. >in the second place, without the magical effects of the magic apples, the former alicorns are aging rapidly in a bizzare reversal of their immortality
  43. >that's not such a problem for Twilight Sparkle
  44. >she was barely an alicorn for four years, so the most she can age is another four years
  45. >though you can't help noticing a pair of thin lines beneath her eyes
  46. >but Celestia and Luna
  47. >they're somewhat over one thousand years old each
  48. >Twilight gives the two of them about a year to live
  49. >and that's why you're sitting in the woods in a darkness that might be midnight
  50. >but it could be noontime
  51. >and there's mud on your hooves
  52. >it's not the first time something like this has happened to you
  53. >and it won't be the last
  54. >and this isn't your story
  55. >it's...
  56. >where did she go?
  57. >you see only four ponies asleep on the forest floor
  58. >none of them are purple
  59. >you stand on all fours
  60. >and wheel around
  61. >looking in all directions
  62. >but a hoof gently lands on your shoulder
  63. <"Rarity."
  64. >oh
  65. >there she is
  66. <"It's my turn to stand guard. Get some sleep."
  67. >you sigh
  68. "Thank you."
  69.  
  70. ~"Rise and shine, ladies! It's mornin' time now!"
  71. >Applejack quints her eyes in the dim starlight
  72. ~"Er, uh, probably. Maybe. Jus' gettup, y'all."
  73. >you've learned the art of packing lightly
  74. >just an ordinary pair of saddlebags seated on your rump
  75. >they're bulging and heavy
  76. >but if this had happened a year or two ago, you'd be pulling a wagon loaded high with frivoloties
  77. >this is about as minimalist as you're going to get
  78. >even now, you can see the sillhouette of one of your friends stooping to take a mouthful of grass
  79. >don't they know creatures step on that?
  80. >sometimes they even… do other things on that
  81. >it's much too icky to think about at this time of day
  82. >or… night?
  83. >fortunately, you don't have to worry about it
  84. >with the blue glow of your magic, you whisk a scone out of your saddlebag
  85. >you make quick, yet polite, work of it
  86. >pretty soon the six of you are trudging through the near total-darkness once again
  87. >except for hornlight, of course
  88. >the magenta of Twilight's horn compliments the blue of your own in a way that fascninates you here in the dark forest
  89. >maybe you can copy this effect in some of your works when you return
  90. >it's a sort of introspective feeling
  91. >too introspective
  92. >you'd go so far as to call this silence somewhat grim
  93. "Oh, Twilight."
  94. <"Hm? Yes?"
  95. "Doesn't this feel… poetic?"
  96. <"What do you mean?"
  97. "You're a unicorn, the Princess is in danger, Equestria is threatened with eternal darkness, and here the six of us are adventuring through the Everfree Forest once more. Doesn't it all sort of… rhyme?"
  98. <"Uh…"
  99. >a bounding figure appears at Twilight's side
  100. >awash in the pink glow of magic, you'd almost imagine that she was actually white
  101. /"Yeah! It's like destiny!"
  102. >Twilight sighs
  103. <"Pinkie, be quiet. This is serious. We don't know what could be out there listening for us."
  104. >well
  105. >just because it's true doesn't mean you can just out and say it like that
  106. >they say that an artist's creations are only an outlet for the art she cannot live herself
  107. >someone who actually lives art won't have much of an appreciation for it
  108. >the thought makes you want to groan
  109. >Twilight extinguishes her horn
  110. >then looks at you and silently bids you to do the same
  111. >the forest is dark once more
  112. /"Whoah! Who turned out the-"
  113. <"Quiet. Something is coming."
  114. >sure enough, up in the canopy
  115. >an orange light grows closer
  116. >the forest grows imperceptably warmer
  117. >as the sound of firey wings grows nearer
  118. >somehow, you're not really worried about it
  119. >it's much too early in the story for anything truly horrific
  120. >indeed, when the creature comes into view, you feel
  121. >at peace
  122. >and you know that you're right when you hear Fluttershy squeal
  123. _"Philomena!"
  124. <"It is Philomena!"
  125. >"And Spike!"
  126. >yes, there he is
  127. >dangling from the claws of the majestic phoenix
  128. <"What? Spike!"
  129. >"You didn't think you could just leave me behind, did you?"
  130. <"I-, errr, this is dangerous!"
  131. >"Relax, I've been on tons of adventures with you guys. Besides, the Princess wanted me to bring you this."
  132. <"A… nut?"
  133. >"Yeah, I don't really get it either. But the Princess said you'd find it useful…"
  134. >their conversation turns to background noise when something fuzzy lands on your neck
  135. >oh, ew! is it a bug?!
  136. >it's a…
  137. >a feather?
  138. >yes, what you've grabbed off of your neck is a feather
  139. >it's glowing a soft orange
  140. >like a sunset
  141. >or like coals in the dark
  142. >Philomena is perched on a branch above you
  143. >staring at you
  144. >if you didn't know any better, you'd say she winked at you
  145. >but you don't have time to tell for sure before she takes wing and disappears
  146. >"Hey, wait! Philomena! You're my ride!"
  147. ~"Oh? I thought you wanted ta come along."
  148. >"I-I do, it's just…"
  149. >giggles
  150. >you study the feather in your hoof
  151. >it's very lovely
  152. >you stick it in your bag
  153. >maybe you'll be able to weave it into a piece after you get back
  154.  
  155. _"Ah! What was that?"
  156. ~"It's nothin'. Pipe down already."
  157. >Rainbow Dash coughs
  158. #"Isn't it kind of weird that we've been wandering abound the Everfree Forest for so long and still haven't met anything that wants to eat us?"
  159. /"But why would we want to meet anything that wants to eat us?"
  160. <"Rainbow's not saying she wants to meet any monsters. She's just saying it's strange that we haven't. And she's right. It's almost as if-"
  161. *"-As if I was right behind you this whole time?"
  162. #"Ha! Knew it!"
  163. >from behind, a section of the woods lights up as bright as day
  164. >and in the light stands a shadow
  165. >a unicorn mare, a bit too tall to be perfectly ordinary
  166. >her coat is glossy black like ebony
  167. >her mane is a flowing mass of gold, emitting light like the Sun
  168. >hm, yellow on black…
  169. >it's eye-popping to be sure…
  170. >but it's so unorthodox as to be jarring
  171. >there's no way those are her natural colors
  172. >there's no mistaking it
  173. >this menacing figure is the maniac of the week
  174. >now what was her name again…?
  175. <"Idun!"
  176. >right
  177. >Idun
  178. <"Give us back the apples!"
  179. >Idun laughs
  180. *"Why? So you can have them? No, I think I can put them to much better use."
  181. >Twilight's horn lights up with arcane power
  182. <"Then we'll have to take them."
  183. >Idun laughs again
  184. >why do they all laugh?
  185. >always the same laugh, too
  186. *"I own more magical artifacts than you own tiaras, princess. Did you really think I'd come unprepared? Be a good girl now and settle down. I'd hate to do anything drastic before you've led me to the Elements of Harmony."
  187. <"You want the Elements?"
  188. #"Never!"
  189. >a blue blur races toward Idun at face-smashing speed
  190. >but it never connects
  191. >where did that sceptre come from?
  192. >what was that noise?
  193. >it's pitch black now
  194. >and windy
  195. >are you… falling?
  196. >something hurts
  197. >and then…
  198. >nothing
  199.  
  200. >the first thing you see is green on the ground
  201. >is the Sun back up?
  202. >did you sleep through the whole adventure already?
  203. >ah, no, if only
  204. >the green is, in fact, not grass, but dragonfire
  205. >a burning branch held aloft in Spike's claw is casting an eerie glow through what seems to be some sort of cave
  206. >"Rarity! Guys, she's waking up!"
  207. _"Oh, Rarity, thank goodness!"
  208. /"Have a good nap, silly-head?"
  209. >hm
  210. >Spike, Fluttershy, and Pinkie Pie are crowding around you
  211. >but where are the others?
  212. "Mm, indeed not. I'd say it was a very dreadful nap indeed. Where is everyone else?"
  213. >the cavern wall speaks
  214. <"We're over here, on the other side. Now that you're awake, we can work on moving forward and regrouping."
  215. "Oh, dear. However did we get separated?"
  216. <"Another one of Idun's toys. I knew she had an extensive collection of artifacts, but I never guessed that she had the Staff of Sysyphus."
  217. "The staff of who now, darling?"
  218. <"The Staff of Sysyphus. It transports the victims to a monstrous underground realm."
  219. "Oh, that's wonderful. How do we get out?"
  220. <"As long as the victims are in the underground realm, the caster has to be there too. Idun is down here somewhere with us. If we can find her and get the Staff, we can go home."
  221. "And I suppose you already have a plan?"
  222. <"Well, it's not much of a plan, but we only really have one option. On either side of this wall, there's only one way to go: forward."
  223. "So we just move along and hope for the best then?"
  224. <"More or less. There's probably a junction somewhere further down where our tunnels come together. It might even lead us straight to Idun."
  225. "And if, instead, we come across winding and treacherous paths that separate us?"
  226. >Twilight pauses
  227. <"We'll figure that out if we come to it. But there's really no choice but to keep moving until we find each other and then Idun."
  228. "Well, in that case, I'm about as ready to be done with this week's adventure as you are. Let us proceed."
  229. <"Agreed, let's go. Rarity, you're in charge over there."
  230. "What? Me?"
  231. <"Who else?"
  232. >oh
  233. >Twilight
  234. >Applejack
  235. >Rainbow Dash
  236. >they're all on the other side of that wall
  237. >oh, dear
  238. >for all the adventures these friends of yours have gotten you caught up in
  239. >this is one thing that's never happened before
  240.  
  241. >beyond the combined light of your horn and Spike's makeshift torch, the darkness is impenetrable
  242. >pop
  243.  
  244. >the solid wall of black obscures the origins of a thousand subtle noises
  245. >pop
  246. >indeed, Twilight had called this place a "monstrous realm", and what monsters could be lurking just out of sight is a question you dare not imagine the answer to
  247. >pop
  248. >a sound of moving air could be merely a draft, or it could be the breath of some massive abomination
  249. >pop
  250. >a sound of dripping water could simply be a leaky aquifer, or it could be the drool of a horrific creature
  251. >poppop
  252. "Pinkie Pie!"
  253. /"Whaaaat?"
  254. "Stop that!"
  255. /"But it's soooo quiet down here!"
  256. _"T-too quiet…"
  257. <"Quiet over there! I think I hear something!"
  258. >you hold your breath
  259. #"Aw, come on, it was noth-"
  260. >the cavern
  261. >trembles
  262. <"There it is!"
  263. ~"Hwat in tarnation!"
  264. "Twilight! What's happening over there? How can we-"
  265. >you're cut short by a very, very un-subtle noise
  266. >some sort of roaring shriek, presumably from whatever the girls on the other side of that wall are seeing
  267. <"Rarity! Keep moving forward! Try to stay near this wall, but staying out of harm's way is your number one priority. If you see any monsters, r-uagh!"
  268. >"Twilight! Twilight!"
  269. >a large chunk of boulder is loosed from the cavern wall and lands mere inches away from you
  270. >you don't need to be told twice
  271. >unceremoniously, you toss the panicking Spike onto your back
  272. >then you shove the frozen Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy
  273. >and the three of you run
  274. >as fast as you can
  275.  
  276. >all
  277. >is quiet
  278. >gone are the drips
  279. >the winds
  280. >the subtle clackings in the distance
  281. >even the suggestion of a constant roar in the background has given way to an oppressive wall of silence
  282. >even your own hoofsteps have been muffled to the faintest sound of shuffling as the cave floor has graduated from rocky to earthen
  283. >the path, at least, has been fairly straight
  284. >your plan right now is to come to a point where your side of the cave merges with Twilight's
  285. >and to wait
  286. >and hope
  287. _"You really think…"
  288. >Fluttershy hesitates
  289. >as though she's unsure if she really wants to break the silence
  290. _"… they're okay?"
  291. >you take a few silent steps before answering
  292. "Of course, darling. Twilight, Applejack, Rainbow Dash… they're all… very, very strong."
  293. >the worst thing about the silence?
  294. >Pinkie Pie is the number one source of it
  295. >you regret telling her to stop making annoying sounds earlier
  296. >you wish she'd tell her silly little jokes
  297. >or do that bouncing-walk thing she always does
  298. >or something
  299. >claws wrap around your neck
  300. >"Hold up, Rarity. It looks like the path splits off here."
  301. >you stop looking forward for a second and see what's in front of you for once
  302. >the path to your right would keep you nearest to the dividing wall that's separated you from the others
  303. >but…
  304. >it's strange
  305. >it feels as though…
  306. >it feels as though the silence is pouring out of that tunnel
  307. >it makes you feel uneasy
  308. >but a feeling is only a feeling
  309. >rationally, that's probably the wiser path to take
  310. "I suppose we'll have to-"
  311. _"Wait."
  312. "Hm?"
  313. _"Sh."
  314. >something like a lizard comes scampering out of the right-hoof tunnel
  315. >there's nothing monstrous about it
  316. >it's certainly small enough to be non-threatening
  317. >but where are its eyes?
  318. >Fluttershy crouches down in its path
  319. >and lets it smack into her face
  320. _"What's wrong, little guy?"
  321. >the creature lets out a panicked chattering sound
  322. _"Oh… my…"
  323. >the creature chatters some more
  324. >and then scampers past Fluttershy
  325. >and vanishes from sight
  326. _"Something down the right-hoof tunnel has been terrorizing the animals. Something has been…"
  327. >Fluttershy looks at her hooves
  328. "Something has been what, darling?"
  329. _"… hurting them."
  330. >the silence pouring out of the right-hoof tunnel intensifies
  331. >it feels like something is getting closer
  332. >it feels like something is only just out of sight
  333. >and you're starting to trust in feelings
  334. "We need to move. Down the left-hoof tunnel. Now, there isn't a moment to waste."
  335.  
  336. -"Rarity."
  337. >you press onward
  338. >quickly
  339. >panickedly
  340. >Spike is sitting on your back
  341. >whispering into your ear:
  342. -"Rarity."
  343. "What?"
  344. >"Something is following us."
  345. >you know
  346. "I don't hear anything behind us."
  347. >"I don't hear anything either. But I see it."
  348. "What do you see?"
  349. >"It's kinda hard to explain. You should look at it for yourself."
  350. "I can't very well stop and turn around if there's something frightening following us, now can I?"
  351. >"I didn't say it was frightening."
  352. "Is it not, then?"
  353. >"No, it is."
  354. "It's smiling at us, isn't it?"
  355. >"Yeah. How could you tell?"
  356. "I can feel it."
  357. -"Rarity."
  358. "Yes, Fluttershy?"
  359. _"Um… that wasn't… me…"
  360. >you know
  361. "Oh, wasn't it?"
  362. _"No."
  363. -"Rarity."
  364. "Pinkie Pie, darling, is that you?"
  365. >your eyes are trained straight forward
  366. >but you can feel PInkie Pie shake her head no
  367. -"Rarity."
  368. "Spike…"
  369. >"Rarity…"
  370. -"Rarity."
  371. >you're not listening
  372. -"Rarity."
  373. >can't
  374. -"Rarity."
  375. >hear
  376. -"Rarity."
  377. >you
  378. -"Rarity."
  379. >you wheel around as though having a fit
  380. >and you shout
  381. "What? What do you want?"
  382. >and it smiles
  383. >and it waves
  384. >and it says
  385. -"Hi."
  386. >and you see it for what it is
  387. >it's the criminal who commits unthinkable crimes
  388. >but it's also the nasty little school filly who annoys her teacher
  389. >what you see is Cruelty
  390. >you look at Fluttershy
  391. >she sees it too
  392. >and she knows what to do
  393. >Fluttershy takes one step toward Cruelty
  394. >Cruelty's smile falters
  395. >how little did Cruelty expect to find its natural predator in a place like this
  396. >Kindness embraces Cruelty in the sweetest hug you've ever had the privilege of witnessing
  397. >and Cruelty whithers away pathetically
  398. >Fluttershy giggles
  399. >as though she's just witnessed a foal make a silly mistake.
  400. _"Let's keep moving on."
  401.  
  402. >Fluttershy is glowing
  403. >not literally, of course
  404. >ever since Spike's torch went out, the only thing that's been glowing down here has been your horn
  405. >but Fluttershy is standing a little taller
  406. >walking forward with a quiet confidence
  407. >Pinkie Pie, however…
  408. >for lack of a better way of putting it
  409. >she's still in a bit of a funk
  410. >eyes downcast
  411. >mouth closed shut
  412. >all in all, she's being very un-Pinkie-like
  413. >it's not so hard to understand
  414. >Pinkie Pie develops very strong affections for almost everyone she knows even incidentally
  415. >and she knows Twilight, Rainbow Dash, and Applejack much more than incidentally
  416. >more than likely, the fact that the last she's heard from them was the three of you…
  417. >well…
  418. >abandoning them to some sort of giant moster
  419. >that's probably what's got her feeling so gloomy
  420. >truth be told, you're more than a little uneasy about the fate of your friends yourself
  421. >your sense of reason is trying to tell you the three of them can more than handle most monsters
  422. >but you've got a bad feeling
  423. >and bad feelings can't be reasoned with
  424. _"Why hello there, little one."
  425. >hm?
  426. >oh, you've been lost in thought again
  427. >Fluttershy is crouching down to smile at…
  428. >a little blue filly?
  429. "Um, Fluttershy, I'm not sure that's quite a good idea…"
  430. >the child begins to sniffle
  431. _"Oh, don't say that, Rarity. You're hurting her feelings."
  432. "Um…"
  433. >the filly opens her mouth
  434. >and begins to wail in earnest
  435. _"Oh, there, there. Are you lost? We'll-"
  436. >a stone strikes Fluttershy in the head
  437. >a laurel of stars and birds whirls around your poor dazed friend
  438. >and she stumbles her way back to you
  439. _"I may need a moment to rest."
  440.  
  441. >the situation as far as you can tell:
  442. >the little blue earth pony crying on the cave floor before you probably isn't, strictly, speaking an earth pony
  443. >you say this because her crying seems to be causing rocks to fly about in the air
  444. >your immediate reaction would be to turn around and try to go down the other side of that fork in the path you came to earlier
  445. >however
  446. >Fluttershy is dazed and confused from being hit with a rock
  447. >she's currently leaning against the cave wall, her head swaying and her knees shaking
  448. >she's not exactly in any shape to be making a speedy escape
  449. >Spike is sitting on your back and screaming into your ear
  450. >and if Pinkie Pie has any ideas, she certainly isn't voicing them
  451. >that little filly needs to be cheered up
  452. >you duck your head and barely dodge a stone that would have probably ruined your facial
  453. >she needs to be cheered up immediately
  454. >you use your magic to rummage about your saddlebags
  455. >you should still have a few…
  456. >pastries!
  457. >this muffin should do the trick
  458. "Ah, excuse me. Little filly? Are you hungry? I've got a nice banana nut muffin here for you, if you'll be a dear and stop crying for a moment."
  459. >and for a moment
  460. >she stops crying
  461. >she looks at the muffin for a moment
  462. >and then
  463. >an ear-piercing wail
  464. >and the rocks come flying again
  465. >and for an instant everything is white
  466. >and then everything is blurry
  467. >and your head hurts
  468. >you groan
  469. "Ah, I'm sorry… You must be watching your weight…"
  470. >you stumble over near Fluttershy
  471. >did Spike fall off of your back?
  472. >spinnking around, you catch a glimpse of Pinkie Pie
  473. >it looks like she's smiling again
  474. >that's… good…
  475. >the next few minutes are odd
  476. >you're definitely conscious
  477. >but you can't really focus on anything beyond keeping your hoof on the spot where the rock hit you
  478. >but you think you can hear…
  479. >laughter?
  480. >eventually, the pain dulls to tolerable levels
  481. >you find yourself facing into the tear-stricken face of Fluttershy
  482. >she's still cradling what looks like a nasty bruise on her forehead
  483. >you force your hoof to the cave floor
  484. >and you turn your body to see what's going on
  485. >the rocks are all strewn about, but all calm
  486. >Pinkie is sitting in the middle of them
  487. >and the sad little filly
  488. >not so sad anymore
  489. >is sitting between Pinkie's forelegs
  490. >giggling
  491. /"And I said, 'That's no racehorse, that's my mother!'"
  492. >the filly's laughter turns to squeals of delight
  493. >and then
  494. >she's gone
  495. >she leaves behind a fleeting echo of merriment
  496. >and that passes too
  497. >Pinkie Pie smiles and waves at you
  498. /"Hi, Rarity! Sorry I've been such a debbie-downer today. That joke you told earlier really cheered me up!"
  499. "Joke?"
  500. /"You know, the one about watching your weight."
  501. >you scoff in disbelief
  502. >then you grin
  503. >and then
  504. >you laugh
  505.  
  506. >maybe it was minutes ago
  507. >maybe it was hours ago
  508. >maybe it was yesterday
  509. >but at some point you started hitting forks in the path rather frequently
  510. >at the first fork there was something of a lengthy discussion as to which path to take
  511. >which one was most likely to lead to Twilight's group
  512. >which one had more air flowing from it
  513. >which one sounded like it might have monsters in it
  514. >which one looked the prettiest
  515. >the second fork had a rather similar discussion
  516. >the third might have as well
  517. >but at some point the discussions stopped
  518. >and at some point after that you lost track of how many paths you had to choose
  519. >maybe it's been dozens
  520. >maybe it's been over a hundred
  521. >somehow you're not worried about it
  522. >it's not that you've despaired of all hope
  523. >no, you feel quite hopeful that you'll be home quite soon
  524. >nor is it that you've lost your sense of reason
  525. >it's as though you're operating on a sense of reason operating on a different level from your conscious thought processes
  526. >the feeling of an arch in your back reminds of you of your cat, Opalescence, as she creeps toward an unfortunate pony's tail to claw at it
  527. >there's just something about this place
  528. >it makes you know exactly what to do, somehow, without telling you what exactly you need to do
  529. >this is a realm of beasts
  530. >and within it, you possess a beast's instinctual reason
  531. >you're on the prowl
  532. >you know that you've passed your last fork
  533. >and that just around this next bend is…
  534. "Idun!"
  535. >a tall, garishly colored unicorn sits upon a shining throne, and pulls her chin away from her hoof
  536. >she's seated in a vast chamber surrounded by what seems like hundreds of impressive magical artifacts
  537. >and she's laughing
  538. *"So it was you three who found me first. I'm so glad. I'll use you as hostages against the stronger three, and hopefully I can get my hooves on the Elements without anyone getting hurt."
  539. >"Uh, there are four of us."
  540. >Idun chuckles
  541. *"Even better. The four of you then, be dears and get in that cage over there."
  542. /"What?"
  543. >Pinkie Pie leaps to her hind hooves and jumps about in exaggerated mock-fisticuffs
  544. /"You think we're just gonna get in some cage and give up? What's with you? Most bad guys would at least do it themselves, you lazy-flank!"
  545. *"You'd be foolish not to. None of you have the strength that the others possess, and you couldn't hope to defeat me. I'd much prefer to do this the easy way, so that noone has to get hurt."
  546. _"I don't want anyone to get hurt…"
  547. "Neither do I, but we aren't getting in any cage. Idun, I'll make a bargain with you."
  548. *"Oh?"
  549. >what are you saying?
  550. >you're rummaging about in your saddlebag, looking for…
  551. >a feather?
  552. >oh
  553. >oh!
  554. >a shining, scarlet feather floats in the air, surrounded by your sparkling, blue magic
  555. "This is the Feather of Philomena. With it, you may live forever just as surely as you could with Celestia's golden apples. I'd like to trade."
  556. >Idun is blinking
  557. *"The Feather… what? If it can make you live forever then why do you need the apples?… Is this a trick?"
  558. >you're staring into her eyes
  559. >and she's sweating
  560. *"I can just take it from you without any trade. How will you stop me?"
  561. "I'll trample this feather under my hoof, Idun, unless you give me the apples and send me and my friends home."
  562. *"You wouldn't! You can't just trample… I won't let you!"
  563. >the phoenix's feather is wrenched from your grasp
  564. >Idun is smelling it
  565. >rubbing it against her face
  566. >salivating over it
  567. "Idun. Will you let me have the apples now?"
  568. >Greed glares at you with hatred, and its horn shines with ominous power
  569. *"Of course not!"
  570. "Very well then."
  571. >with one hoof you grab Spike by the tail, and with the other by his neck
  572. >"Whoah, Rarity, what are you- gak!"
  573. >you yank on poor Spike's tail
  574. >and a stream of dragonfire hits the Feather of Philomena
  575. >and for a moment
  576. >everything is green…
  577.  
  578. >six mares stand in a nighted forest
  579. >with them is one baby dragon
  580. >one jar of golden apples
  581. >one magic staff
  582. >and one newborn foal, with a pink coat and a silver mane
  583. >you smirk
  584. >you knew her hair was dyed
  585. >Twilight's mane is mussed up and singed
  586. >Rainbow Dash is splattered with some sort of green substance across her chest
  587. >Applejack is breathing heavily and matted with sweat
  588. <"Huh? What? Who? Where? Rarity? Pinkie Pie? Fluttershy? Spike! What happened?"
  589. "Oh, nothing much, darling, I just defeated Idun for you."
  590. >"With some help…"
  591. <"What? You? But-"
  592. "Why, I get to be the hero sometimes, don't I?"
  593. >Twilight blinks
  594. <"What happened?"
  595. >you and your erstwhile companions explain the trials you all had to face
  596. >Fluttershy's encounter with Cruelty
  597. >Pinkie Pie's conquest of Tears
  598. >and how Idun, when you got right down to it, was Greed
  599. >and how you deafeated her
  600. >with Spike's help, of course
  601. >apparently, the adventure's of Twilight's group weren't nearly so poetic
  602. >they mostly just had to fight with giant monsters
  603. >Twilight scratches her chin with her hoof
  604. <"But… there's one thing I don't understand."
  605. "What's that?"
  606. <"The thing you did with the dragon fire and the phoenix feather. I've never heard of that. How did you know it would work?"
  607. >you shrug
  608. "I suppose I just had a feeling."
  609.  
  610. >after a trip to Canterlot, the Princesses are young again and the Sun graces the sky once more
  611. >after a train ride back to Ponyville, all you want to do is take a nap
  612. >folks always suppose that these stories end with a quip, or a group laugh, or even a musical number
  613. >but really, they end with about six additional hours of beauty rest
  614. >adventures are exhausting
  615. >you're about to push open the door to the Boutique when something tickles your neck
  616. >oh, ew! is it a bug?
  617. >it's a…
  618. >a feather?
  619. >you grin
  620. >perched on the sign displaying the name of your business is a majestic, orange bird
  621. >she winks at you
  622. >you giggle
  623. "Good night, Philomena."

Horse Confessions

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